13
The waiting room looked more like an talent agent's office—a place where you would exchange your headshot, tell about your previous acting experience, and be called into an office to discuss how you were an extra in the crowd scene in the movie JFK.
Photos lined the walls—mostly black and white—some eight by ten, some poster sized, all of people smiling. There were large, green potted plants in every corner and many more in between. It was slightly unnerving to the blonde attorney the way there were no other patients there, subscriptions to Glamour and National Geographic magazines on the coffee table.
This doctor had been recommended by Melinda who had known several women and couples who had used the services. Not only was Dr. Nicole Bensaro a fertility doctor, she had also been a gynecologist and obstetrician for over twenty years. Melinda trusted her and so did Alex and Olivia.
The blonde looked over at Olivia, who seemed to be fine. The brunette was wearing dark blue jeans and a button down white Oxford with a red leather jacket over it, slowly flipping through a Good Housekeeping, casually chomping on a large wad of bubble gum, possibly just two or three pieces of chewing gum—Alex didn't know.
All she knew was that they were here. The doctor was about to root around up inside of Olivia's business and tell her if it was a go or a no go to carry a child.
Alex looked at Olivia again, the blonde not even having sat back against the chair yet, her rigid body anxiously tense, her hands rubbing the tops of her charcoal gray pantsuit nervously. She took a deep breath and then immediately felt a hand on her back. She looked to her left, to the woman she loved more than anything and, seeing those warm cocoa eyes, and felt her body melt with relaxation.
If Olivia was at ease, Alex would make an effort to be at ease, as well.
"Babe…you OK?" Olivia asked and then blew a bubble.
It was bubble gum. Alex could smell it and see its bright, almost fluorescent, pinkness.
"I—I think so…how are you, Liv? You're the one that's about to be opened like an oyster…poked…prodded."
Olivia laughed, her body shaking, throwing her head back. "Oh, Alex…I love you…"
"Mrs. Benson?" A petite woman of Pacific Island descent questioned, possibly Filipino, with mauve scrubs on, a short black pixie cut and a perfect white smile, held the door open.
Olivia closed the magazine and set it on the table, smiled at Alex, and stood, taking Alex's hand. "That's me…" She squeezed the blonde's hand reassuringly. "You ready, Babe?"
Alex nodded, her eyes tearing. Olivia kept hold of her hand as they walked down the hallway and they stopped at a scale.
"Shoes off and just step right on up…" she chirped.
"Ugh…we don't even have one of these at home…" Olivia smiled.
"We don't need one, Babe…that's what I'm there for," Alex kidded. "I'll let you know when you start to pudge out…"
Olivia shook her head, smiling.
"It might be a good idea to get a digital scale for when you do get pregnant so that you can make sure you maintain a healthy weight during pregnancy. Dr. Bensaro will recommend it." She moved a few levers. "OK…all done. You can step off…"
Olivia stepped off of the scale and slipped her leather slip-ons back on. "Bad?"
"No…absolutely perfect weight for your height, Mrs. Benson-Cabot…"
"Please, call me Olivia…since we're going to be seeing a lot of each other…"
The doctor's assistant smiled and said, "I'm Annie…I have a feeling we will…"
The two women were led down a short hallway and into a small room, examining table, sink, large window with another large plant, and a small settee overlooking the city.
"Undress and slip this on…" she held a baby blue gown up, "…the doctor will be with you in a few moments. Any questions?"
Olivia handed her purse to Alex, and the blonde moved to the small sofa by the window. "Can my wife stay?"
"Absolutely, Olivia…"she smiled and closed the door.
Alex set both purses down and looked at Olivia who now, had slight apprehension on her face. Alex walked up to her and put her hands on the brunette's shoulders. "You OK?"
Olivia placed her hands on her wife's waist and took a very slow, very controlled breath and let it out, smiling. She nodded slowly and then her focus went to Alex's mouth, "Do you realize I might be pregnant for the holidays?"
A giddiness rose inside of Alex at the thought and she couldn't help the grin that slowly crept across her face. She leaned in and kissed Olivia gently before pulling away, eyes closed. She opened them and placed her hand on the brunette's cheek, "I'm so excited, Liv…" she whispered.
Olivia smiled, "I'd better change…"
"Wait…let me get comfortable…" Alex smirked, sitting on the settee. "OK…"
"You ready, Your Majesty?" Olivia removed her leather jacket and placed it next to Alex.
"That I am…carry on…" Alex leaned back and folded her hands on her belly. Olivia proceeded to remove her clothing, placing each item carefully next to Alex, and then slipped on the soft, cotton gown on, pulling the small step of the exam table out and stepping onto it before sitting on the crackly, white paper.
A knock was heard at the door, a pause, then the door opened, revealing a woman, about Alex's height and weight, but with a thick salt and pepper braid down the middle of her back, tortoise shell glasses, and an earthy brown, ankle-length dress underneath her white doctor's coat, a necklace of tiger's eye beads in between her lapels. She smiled at Olivia, then Alex, then Olivia again, holding her hand out to the brunette who was already comfortable on the exam table, her legs stretched out and crossed at the ankle.
"I'm Doctor Nicoletta Bensaro, or Nicole to those that know me…Olivia?" She shook Olivia's hand.
"Yes…" Olivia smiled.
Dr. Bensaro turned to Alex and stepped towards her, "Alex?"
Alex smiled, already feeling the warmth radiating from this woman with kind, brown eyes. "Yes, Alex…this gorgeous woman's wife…" Alex smiled at Olivia.
"OK…" Dr. Bensaro pulled up a small rolling stool to the space in between the women, "I see that you are newly married…congratulations…" She smiled, her gaze moving among the two, "…forty-two…never had a child, menstrual cycles are regular…disease free…exercise regularly…ovulation seems to be the middle of the month…according to your list of your past six menstrual cycles you've provided…"
Olivia nodded. "I try to take care of myself, Doctor…I know how important it is, not only in life and my job, but also to be able to get pregnant and carry a baby…"
"Wise woman…I see that you are with the NYPD? Dangerous job…"
Alex saw Olivia's face fall, "It is…my captain knows that I might be taking a leave of absence…"
"Well, I highly recommend it…with your age and the stress on your body that this pregnancy will bring, it'd be a good idea to slow down at work and then gradually leave it behind until you've come full term and delivered."
Olivia smiled, "Of course…"
Alex's eyes filled with tears. This was happening. The doctor was speaking like Olivia was already pregnant, had already been impregnated. The reality hit Alex like a ton of bricks. The woman she had been in love with for years…now her wife…now the mother of her children…
Alex's lower lip trembled and she drew her mouth inward to avoid a full out blubber.
"Al?" Olivia questioned from the table. "Babe…come here…"
Alex stood and walked to Olivia, taking the offered hand. Alex brought her caramel skin to her mouth and kissed. "Happiness, Babe…pure happiness." Alex smiled.
"OK…lean back and relax. I'll begin with the typical gynecological exam. Then, I'll do the ultrasound, which will give me an idea of everything and how it's situated; if everything is where it should be as far as ovaries, fallopian tubes, the position of your cervix…then we'll draw some blood to check hormone levels. The ultrasound will let us know, today, in just a few minutes, if your body has the capacity to carry a baby, and the blood work will let us know if your body is chemically ready. Make sense?"
OOO
Olivia nodded, noticing her bride was still crying. Alex was so emotional and Olivia loved it. Although, seeing her so emotional pulled at the strings of longing to take her into her arms and kiss her senseless, hold her until her body relaxed against her, and she felt peace.
"Lay back…and just relax…think of the beach..." Alex coaxed.
Olivia nodded as the doctor placed her feet in the necessarily glorious stirrups, her legs awkwardly positioned in a knock-kneed fashion.
"Think of Greece, Babe…"
"Mmm…I'm already there, Al," Olivia smiled, closing her eyes, one hand behind her head, the other over her upper belly.
Dr. Bensaro manipulated Olivia's legs the way she needed them to be positioned and then got to work, sliding the metal cart closer, tools on top of a blue medical cloth. "A little pressure…"
Olivia winced slightly, inhaling a quick intake of air.
Alex was right there, grabbing her hand and smiling. Olivia looked into those cerulean pools and melted.
"Almost done…" the doctor said slowly, concentrating on the task at hand. "OK…all done…you can put your knees together now." She removed her blue latex gloves, the snapping sound echoing throughout the room. "Looks good in there…everything appears normal. I took a cervical sample to run for any unknown diseases but, as you said, and we have in your records, they will undoubtedly come out clean. We'll do the ultrasound next."
Olivia smiled at Alex, the blonde stroking Olivia's hair from the top of her forehead and backward.
"You OK?"
"You know…you're gonna have to go through this, too, Babe…one day…"
Alex whispered, "I can't wait, Liv…" She kissed Olivia's forehead softly.
"Well, I can tell you two have a happy sex life…" the doctor said, smirking at the women.
"Wh—you can tell that?" Alex looked absolutely mortified.
"Oh, yes, we have a very happy body right here…"
Olivia began giggling, knowing the doctor was teasing her wife.
"You can see that from your…exam?" Alex asked innocently.
"Not really…but I can see it in your faces…"
Alex relaxed, smiling along with Olivia. "You got me, Doc…"
Olivia smiled at Alex as the doctor took the ultrasound probe into her hand and turned the display screen on.
"OK…this is gonna be cold." Dr. Bensaro squirted some gel onto the sensor of the probe and set the bottle down. "You ready?"
Olivia nodded and looked at Alex.
Alex's lower lip trembled, "Next time we look at this…our baby will be growing inside you, Liv…"
Olivia nodded, her own eyes tearing mercilessly now.
Dr. Bensaro pressed the probe to Olivia's belly and then began moving it around—top, bottom, sides, center. "Looks good…and you're right…next time there should be a baby growing inside, ladies."
She smiled knowingly at both women.
Olivia witnessed Alex take a deep breath, trying so hard not to be a blubbering fool.
"Looks good…everything is where it should be...blood next…"
The doctor put the probe on top of the machine and then took the necessary materials to take a vial of blood. "Just a little stick. You have good veins, Olivia…" Carefully, she inserted the needle, letting the vial fill up to capacity. She removed it and then held a piece of cotton to the area before taking a band-aid and applying it gently.
"OK…that's it…results will be back tomorrow. So far, everything looks perfect. Now, you know that it may take as many as six or seven tries but could happen on the first one…"
"Yes…" Olivia said softly.
"Have you picked out a donor?"
"Not yet, but…Alex and I were going to look at the books and decide together." Olivia squeezed Alex's hand firmly. "Babe?"
"Yes…" Alex said softly, "…we want Olivia's coloring for this one and my coloring for the next…"
"Well, it looks like it's a go for choosing a donor…Susannah will give you the books to peruse at home and you can bring them back when you've made a decision…"
Both women nodded.
"You can get dressed now…I'll leave you two alone…I am happy for you two, in more ways than you know…I also have three babies at home thanks to this procedure…" she winked.
Olivia understood what the doctor was saying, completely.
"My wife and I had our babies years ago but I would do it all over again with as wonderful children as it has brought us…" She squeezed Olivia shoulder, turned, and left the room.
"Well, Baby…that's it," Olivia said smiling.
"Yeah, that's it…" Alex whispered. She leaned over and kissed Olivia softly.
… … … … … …
Alex and Olivia sat with a bottle of cabernet on the coffee table, after having had a dinner of roasted chicken and salad. They sat close on the sofa, Alex's legs overlapping Olivia's, a donor book spread across both of their laps. Landon and Charles had to postpone the dinner because Charles was feeling under the weather, a cold taking over his system.
"Anonymous donor #324767…Jeez…three-hundred thousand, Al…"
"Good money, I guess…" Alex scrolled down the information with her finger, "…brown hair, green eyes, twenty-three, Irish and Italian descent…I.Q. 109…absolutely not, Liv…"
Olivia looked at Alex now, "What's an appropriate I.Q., Al? What's acceptable to you?"
"One-thirty and higher, Liv. Come on…"
Olivia looked at Alex, smirking. "What's your I.Q., Al?"
Alex looked sheepishly at her wife, "One thirty-nine…do you know yours?"
Olivia smirked, "Yes, I do, actually."
Alex looked at her with raised eyebrows, "And?"
"I don't think I should tell you…"
Alex sat back and looked at Olivia, smirking. "Because it's higher or lower?"
Olivia began giggling, watching the competitive side in her wife emerge.
"Liv…what is it?"
Olivia shook her head which turned into a grope fest, Alex trying to tickle the information out of her. Olivia began laughing and then moaning as Alex's hands found their way underneath Olivia's loose black, silk, night shirt, fingering her bare breasts.
"If I can't tickle it out of you, I'll seduce it out of you…" Alex smiled, kissing Olivia's neck in just the right spot.
"Uhhh…Al…" Olivia closed her eyes, still smiling. "If I tell you, you and your type A self are gonna be mad…"
Alex pulled away, hands still on the brunette's breasts, "Because it's higher…" she said matter-of-factly.
Olivia smiled and nodded.
"What is it, Babe…?"
"One forty-six…"
Alex's mouth dropped open, the blonde staring dumbfounded at Olivia.
"What, Babe? It doesn't matter…come here…" Olivia tried to pull Alex closer, the blonde resisting her hold. "It's not that much higher…negligible, really…"
"Oooh, she pulls out the robust vocabulary now…"
"I've always had robust vocabulary, Babe…you've just always been too focused on my lady parts to notice…"
Alex smiled then and leaned in and kissed Olivia, mouths parting, tongue gently probing. "You're right…I can't get past your lady parts, Babe…they blur my focus and diminish my intelligence…" Alex hands found their way to Olivia's breasts again, thumbs lightly caressing hardened nipples. Olivia shivered beneath her, moaning her satisfaction.
"Let's do this later…we have all weekend, Al…"
Their kissing continued, even as they stood, even as they walked down the hallway, even as they fell onto the bed.
Picking from the hundreds of thousands of names could wait. Their love couldn't.
… … … … … …
Saturday night and the dinner party was going well. Charles was feeling better and had chosen to be the bartender for their intimate dinner party of ten. Food had been prepared and was ready to be served as the group talked and partook of pre-dinner cocktails.
"So…what's the deal with you and Fin?" Olivia asked Melinda, casually, the two sipping on a special drink Charles had concocted for them, complete with umbrellas, pineapple wedges, maraschino cherries and tiny cocktail straws. Olivia was in trouble because this delicious drink tasted like fruit punch Kool-aid to her.
"What do you mean, Liv? Fin and I are just friends…"
Olivia smiled, bumping shoulders with her friend. "Uh huh…got it…"
Melinda took a step back, smirking. "He is more like a brother to me than anything…"
Olivia smiled, sipping her drink. Her focus now went to her pointed, glittery gold sling-back heels, her black pencil skirt, and her dolman gold sequined top, pretending to remove a piece of lint from it. "I see something else…" Olivia said casually.
"Oh, you do, do you?" Melinda smiled.
"Hey guys…what are we talking about?" Casey asked, joining their group.
Alex was in the kitchen, talking to Madeleine and Constance, Fin, Charles, Landon, and Munch talking by the bar cart next to the TV that was showing a basketball game Fin had requested be on—Knicks against the Spurs—soft Diana Krall playing in the background.
"We're not talking about anything, Casey…" Melinda tried, smirking at Olivia.
"You never thought about it, Mel?" Olivia continued.
"Oh, I've thought about it…"
"What happened to Leo?"
"He's still in the picture…we're just taking things slow…"
Casey looked between Olivia and Melinda, obviously feeling the effects of the three mixed drinks she had already had. "Thought about what?" she asked, smiling.
"Oh, Casey…you look so beautiful tonight…" Olivia began, "…that green top really brings out your eyes, girl…"
"Nice change of subject…" Casey admitted. "Are we talking about Mel and Fin?"
"No, Casey, we're not talking about Fin and I…" Melinda tried.
Casey's shoulders sagged slightly, "Oh…darn…because you two would be hot…"
"Who's to say that hasn't happened already?" Melinda asked.
"Ooooohhh!" Olivia and Casey crooned together, drawing the attention of everyone in the room.
Alex came up behind Olivia now, wrapping one arm around her waist, the other holding a drink, Constance and Madeleine close behind. Constance looked regal in simple black dress and heels, and her girlfriend, Madeleine, was a gorgeous, petite blonde, in a simple red sheath dress.
"Babe?" Alex asked, whispering against Olivia's ear. Olivia felt her breath brushing her neck hairs and smiled.
"Yeah?"
"All the dishes are out…let everyone know it's ready…" Alex kissed her neck softly, Olivia closing her eyes from the sensation.
Olivia cleared her throat and announced, "Dinner's ready guys…it's buffet style so help yourself…"
Alex now wrapped both arms around her wife and Olivia could feel the blonde's breathing against her ear. The attorney had already had a couple of drinks and Olivia pulled away smiling, looking at her gorgeous long-sleeved ivory silk top and black palazzo pants, black heels making her inches taller, her hair down, glasses on.
Dinner was a simple baked salmon, roasted olive oil and sea salt asparagus, and sun dried tomato couscous, all prepared by the women. Everyone enjoyed filling their plates, raving about the food, wonderful conversations had. Perched at various locations in the penthouse, some sitting, some standing, Landon brought his fork to his glass in a toast. "Ladies and gentlemen…may I have your attention?"
Everyone became quiet, their focus now on Landon. "Olivia and Alex said that it's OK to share…but I wanted to be the first to congratulate them on their impending plans of motherhood…"
All eyes turned to Olivia and Alex, the brunette taking the blonde's hand as they sat on the sofa.
"According to them…" he winked at the ladies, "…everything looks good for Olivia to become a mother…and our sweet Alex, as well."
The small dinner group erupted in cheers and whistles.
Olivia leaned into Alex and pressed her lips to the blonde, mouths opening slightly. Olivia could feel Alex's lips turn into a smile as they kissed.
Olivia smiled, pulling away.
"And these two…" Landon's voice caught, "…are gonna be the most wonderful mother's I've ever seen…" Charles came up to him and wrapped his arm around his shoulder. "To Alex and Olivia!"
Everyone held their glass up in a toast.
Clinking was heard all around and Olivia looked at Alex, now practically on her lap. Alex leaned into Olivia, "There's another announcement, Babe…look at Constance and Madeleine's fingers…"
Olivia looked and noticed a diamond ring on each of their fingers. She gasped and smiled, looking at the women who had their arms around each other.
"Girls!" she beamed. "Congratulations!" Olivia stood, Alex following as the four women took each other in hug, everyone else following suit.
"When did it happen?" Olivia asked.
"Last weekend…it was so romantic…" Madeleine spoke. "Constance asked me after dinner over dessert…"
Olivia inspected the rings. "I'm so happy for you…"
"You've inspired us…" Constance said, her voice shaking. "Thank you…"
… … … … … …
With dinner eaten, a dessert of bananas foster had, coffee served, the crowd began to disperse. Alex sat with Olivia, the basketball game long over, the news on mute in the background, as the remaining guests—Casey, Melinda, and Fin—sat on the sectional talking.
"So…" Olivia began slowly.
Alex could tell that her wife was feeling the fruity cocktails Charles had been making like Tom Cruise all evening.
"Well, we're gonna be going…" Melinda stood, Fin following her, eyeing her backside as she stood from the sofa and began to move from the sofa and towards Alex and Olivia.
She saw her wife smirk at Melinda and Fin. "Brother, my ass…" she mumbled as she stood to hug the two.
Alex stayed on the sofa, not sure she would be able to stand without help. Melinda leaned over her and kissed and hugged the blonde, Fin doing the same.
"Leaving together?" Alex asked.
She and Olivia had already discussed the blatant attraction between the M.E. and fellow senior detective and now any clues to their attraction had been blown obscenely out of proportion.
"You two have a good night," Olivia chided.
Fin spoke, smiling, "You two have a good night, Baby Girl…" Fin said, smiling.
"Oh, we will…" Olivia winked.
"Goodnight all…" Melinda made her way toward the door, Fin following close behind. They exited and closed the door behind them.
Alex looked over at Casey, the red head's eyes closed, head leaning back on the back of the sofa. "Looks like this one is a sleep over buddy again…" Alex kissed Olivia softly.
"Yeah…looks like it…we should start charging her rent…" Olivia giggled.
Olivia walked over and nudged the sleeping attorney with her knee, Casey stirring in her sleep.
Her emerald eyes popped open. "Is it time to go?" she questioned.
"No, Babe…you're staying here…" Olivia answered, leaning forward to grab Casey's hands. "Come on, Case…"
"I can stay here…I'm comfortable…just bring me a blanket…" she mumbled.
Olivia smiled at Alex and motioned her head towards the hallway. Alex walked to the linen closet in the hallway and took a blanket and a pillow from it.
She handed the plush blanket to Olivia and the brunette draped it over the red head's form, Alex placing the pillow underneath her head gently.
With the dishes already done by their generous guests, the two women locked the door, turned the lights out and walked back to their bedroom, Hillary already on the bed sleeping. Alex closed the door, leaving it open a crack.
… … … … … …
AAA
Alex could hear Olivia thinking as they lay, ready for bed, waiting for sleep to take them.
"Liv?" Alex questioned, sidling up to Olivia and spooning her. She wrapped her arm around the brunette's middle.
"Hmmm?" Olivia answered.
"You OK?"
Olivia turned slightly, "Yeah…I'm OK…you?"
"If I thought that was the truth, I'd be OK…" Alex offered.
Olivia smiled in the light of the city streetlights. Alex saw her wife's face as the light hit her olive complexion just so. "You know me so well, Al…" Olivia said dramatically, "I'm just worried about the I.Q. thing…"
Alex pinched Olivia's side.
"Ow!" She grabbed Alex's hand. "You know you can't do that when I get pregnant…the pinching has to stop, Babe…"
She could still see Olivia smiling and she could still sense something was on her mind.
"Olivia…talk to me…"
"What if I can't get pregnant, Al? What if everything is set to go and it doesn't happen? What if we pick the wrong donor? What if—"
"Baby…remember how I was before our wedding? Full of what ifs?"
Olivia nodded, Alex propping herself on her elbow to see the detective better.
"There are so many things we could anticipate, this could happen, that could happen. Like you said the night before our wedding…we could think about those things…obsess about them…but whatever happens, we're in it together and we can get through it…"
Olivia turned now, looking at the blonde in the darkness. Alex could see her eyes filling with tears. "Yeah…you're right…you're the one that calms me, you know…"
Alex leaned her forehead to Olivia's and inhaled deeply, closing her eyes.
"I love you, Al…"
"And I, love you, Olivia Benson…no name change required…"
The two women laughed before Alex returned to pressing her body against her wife, the two drifting off into another night of blissful, marital slumber.
… … … … … …