"Oh my god, I am dead!"
"Oh stop being so dramatic!" my mother brought a martini glass to her lips and took a long sip. Well it was nice to know that they let her drink in heaven. Probably the only way they could stand her up there. God maybe accepting of all his beings but he sure didn't have to put up with them all.
"But you're dead, and now your here, so ipso facto- I must be dead as well. Really mom logic never was your forte."
"You aren't dead, you in between."
"So I could be dead?"
"When has this obsession with death started?"
"I just want to know, life was just starting to get good down there. I just want to know if I'm ever going back."
She sighed, "drink?"
I took the offered glass and gulped the contents down. Handing it back I noticed the glass was full again, God sure knew how to keep my mother happy.
"So what am I doing here? What are you doing here?" I thought for a moment, "am I going to be visited by three ghosts to show me my past present and future, and how I have to change my ways?"
"No you'll just have to do with me?"
"And what am I doing with you?"
"I'm just here to talk to you."
I hesitated, "about what?"
"Life. I see you have a boyfriend now."
I smiled, "yeah."
"And you're still bothering your sister."
"If by bothering you mean trying to be a part of her life, then yeah."
"Leave Loretta alone, she has to learn that all on her own, and she doesn't need you pushing her faster than she's willing to go."
"Are you sure you're my mother?"
"I have the stretch marks to prove it."
"Really you still have stretch marks? You'd think they'd have gotten rid of them up here."
"I know right. A plague on my angelic form."
I laughed. "So is this what you came to tell me? That you have still have stretch marks and to leave Loretta alone?"
"No. Listen to your grandparents, don't to anything stupid, for goodness sake don't get pregnant before you get married and don't you dare get married before you turn 25. No parent likes to say this but you're doing just fine with out me."
I wrapped my arms around her and hugged her tight, being careful not to spill her drink. "Why did you have to go sailing anyway?"
"The Clarks were out sailing and you know they were going to pass off that pathetic dingy as the best yacht in the fleet, and you know we could never pass up an opportunity to show them who's best."
I hugged her tighter, "never."