"Chlo?" Beca calls out as she walks through the door. "I'm home!"
God, that sounds so domestic, she's not even your girlfriend. Beca rolls her eyes at herself and drops her bag and suitcase at the foot of the door.
"Beca!" Beca whips around at the sound of her name, and she barely has time to gasp before Chloe barrels into her, almost tackling her to the floor with the force of it.
"Dude!" Beca protests, but the smile on her face gets so big upon hearing Chloe's joyful tone. God, she's so glad to be home.
"I got a job!" Chloe exclaims, breaking the hug but grabbing Beca's hands in her own. She is bouncing on the balls of her feet and Beca struggles with keeping up with her bubbliness.
"Woah, slow down," Beca says gently, waving their fingers together. She knows Chloe's hands like the back of hers, and there is no fumbling in doing so, they fit together perfectly. It's natural act and Beca doesn't have to think much about it before doing it anymore. "Let's sit down, you're making me dizzy."
She leads Chloe to the couch and sits her down. Raising an eyebrow, she waits for the redhead to start.
"I got an interview last week in a school to be their new music teacher next year, and they called me ten minutes ago to tell me I had it!" Chloe beams, and her happiness is so contagious that Beca mirrors it, tears starting to prickle behind her eyes.
"Oh my God," Beca is the one almost suffocating Chloe in a hug now. "That's amazing, congratulations."
Chloe exhales as Beca pulls away, "Thank you."
"Why didn't you tell me you had an interview?" Beca asks. They talked nearly every day when Beca was in New York and it hasn't come up once.
Chloe looks down, then back up, playing with Beca's fingers absent-mindedly. "I wanted to do this one thing on my own. Ever since I got married, I've felt like I was always relying on someone else. With Greg first and... obviously with you too since I moved here. I wanted to prove myself that I could do something without feeling the need to have someone support me through it."
Beca nods, understanding Chloe's reasons perfectly. Her hands seem to move on their own accord, cupping Chloe's cheeks tenderly, and leaning her forehead against hers. "I'm so proud of you."
There is a beat of silence where she forgets how to breathe, and her heart begins to speed up when she sees Chloe's eyes drift down to her lips. Beca's mind jumps back to Hood Night, where Chloe had grabbed her and their foreheads had touched. She remembers the somersault her heart had made then, too.
Snap out of it. "So!" Beca exclaims, pulling away, hands landing on her thighs to keep away from Chloe. "Should we go out and celebrate? I'm sure the others will be down."
"I've already called Aubrey saying I wanted to go out and celebrate something. I didn't tell her what because I wanted you to be the first to know. But she said she's down and that she would convince Jesse to come, too."
After grabbing some dinner and changing clothes, both women hail a cab and meet with the couple at a bar downtown. Stacie declined the invitation since she has Bella tonight, and hasn't spent much with her daughter the past few days. The first part of the evening goes well, very well even. Chloe hasn't really gone out since she's moved to LA, and even though she assures Beca she's doing much better with crowds, Beca can't help but worry.
"C'mon," Aubrey calls out over the music, grabbing Chloe's hand, "Let's go dance."
The redhead sets her drink down and follows her friend out on the dancefloor. Beca's eyes momentarily follow Chloe, because she looks freaking hot in that skirt and Beca's fingers start to tingle. She casts a sideways glance to Jesse, feeling his eyes boring into her.
"What?" she drawls out, suppressing an eyeroll.
Jesse looks like a deer caught in headlights, "What, what?"
"Please," the DJ scoffs. "You've got that look on your face. Spill,"
Jesse's eyes advert to the dancefloor, nodding toward the two women dancing, "She has feelings for you."
Beca is a bit of a lightweight, and after three drinks, she can tell she's definitely got a buzz going on, but Jesse's words have her sober up. Even though Stacie has said the same thing to her, her brain is stubborn enough not to fall for it, the conversation she had with Chloe that same night about being in a relationship being etched into it. "Don't be stupid."
"The way she looks at you, Becs. It's like you're the only woman on the planet. Aubrey agrees with me."
Beca sits straighter on her stool, her jaw dropping in disbelief. "You two talk about this?!"
"Oh, only all the time," Jesse says, shrugging his shoulder. "We're already one of those old couples who don't have anything more exciting to do than to meddle."
"Well, Chloe's recently told me that she's not interested in a relationship. She says it's too soon, and I don't want her to be a fling, so I'm waiting for the right moment, until she's ready."
Beca stops talking when she sees Aubrey coming back toward them, on her own.
"Where's Chloe?" she asks the blonde, frowning.
"Bathroom break," Aubrey replies, a little breathless from dancing. She takes a sip of her drink before she drags Jesse and a reluctant Beca to the dance floor.
Beca'd rather be in that DJ booth than stuck in a sea of drunk and sweaty people. A song passes, and Chloe still hasn't returned. Trying to shove her worry away, Beca decides to wait one more song before she goes on a search for her friend. As soon as the mix ends (it is a pretty good one, she must admit, although her thoughts are set on something else), she's stalking toward the bathroom. The club isn't big, so she quickly reaches it.
Pushing the door open, she checks every cubicle, but finds them empty. Uneasiness starts to grasp her throat, and her mouth suddenly feels dried up. It's only when she turns around that she hears some mumbling on the opposite side of the bathroom. It's faint over the pounding music, but it makes Beca turn toward it.
She doesn't know if it's relief or dread she feels when she sees Chloe huddled in a corner on the far wall, hidden behind the row of faucets.
"Chlo," Beca walks to her and crouches down as best as she can in her heels. The sight before her brings a pain to her chest, the kind of pain one would get if a hand was squeezing their heart. Chloe has her eyes screwed shut, her hands pressed tightly over her ears. Her legs are tucked to her chest, and she's rocking back and forth while mumbling words that Beca cannot quite make out. She can hear Chloe breathing rapidly into her knees and Beca's own breathing starts to pick up.
With each rock of her body, Chloe's head connects with the wall behind her and the sound echoes in the empty bathroom.
"Chloe, honey," Beca tries again, trying to keep her voice steady. She grabs the redhead's shoulders, who recoils from the touch with a whimper, making Beca back away immediately. The rocking intensifies, and Chloe's voice grows louder, without the words sounding any clearer. Beca is rooted to her spot, not knowing what to do. She has helped Chloe with her nightmares and panic attacks before, but the scene unfolding in front her very eyes is another level of distress, one she cannot hug away. It's painful to watch and Beca wishes Stacy had come with them to the bar, she wishes dearly she knew what to do.
"Please," Chloe murmurs, and Beca frowns. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I-I won't do it again."
"Chloe, it's me, Beca," the brunette is at loss for words. It's obvious Chloe is hallucinating or something. Beca wants to reach out for her, at least to prevent her head from hitting the wall, but she's afraid touching Chloe might make things worse. "Look at me."
"Just let me go, please."
The words can't be directed to her, because she isn't even touching her. Beca puts the puzzle pieces together then, realizing Chloe is experiencing a PTSD episode. Tears have been streaming down Chloe's cheeks, and Beca is pretty sure she's in the same state.
She hears the door open and whips her head around, almost giving herself a whiplash in the process.
"Get out!" she growls to the two girls coming in. They are taken aback by the sudden shout and out of the bathroom in no time.
Turning her attention back to her friend, Beca kneels and carefully reaches for Chloe's hands, gently prying them away from her ears. She sighs in relief when Chloe doesn't flinch away, and grasps both hands, pulling them to her chest, her thumbs grazing Chloe's knuckles back and forth.
"Chloe, baby," her voice cracks with the emotion tearing at her chest as Chloe's ragged breathing intensifies until she's wheezing. "It's Beca."
She's at loss on what to do, so she does the one thing she knows might calm Chloe.
"I'm bullet proof, nothing to lose, fire away fire away," she sings softly, as close to Chloe's ear as she can, given her position. "Ricochet, you take your aim, fire away, fire away."
Chloe's rocking slows, enough for her head not to be hitting the wall anymore. Beca feels some of the tension leave Chloe's body, and her shoulders slump down. Her face relaxes slightly.
"You shoot me down, but I won't fall, I am Titanium." Beca repeats the chorus twice and reaches over to wipe some of Chloe's tears away. To her surprise, Chloe starts humming the song, which prompts Beca to sing it again, from the beginning. She sings until Chloe's breathing evens out, until she stops rocking.
"Chloe," Beca's voice is so gentle that it doesn't even sound like hers. "It's okay, you're okay."
Chloe takes a shaky breath in and a shaky breath out, before finally opening her eyes. The white around the blue is bloodshot, and there are still tears swimming in them, threatening to topple over and down her cheeks. Beca moves so she's sat next to her and gathers her into her arms. Chloe's like a dead weight in her hold, and her breathing gets irregular every few seconds, as if battling against another panic attack bubbling up in her chest. Beca's hand rubs up and down her back until it steadies.
"Can we go home?"
Home. With Beca. That's what she means by Home, and it mends Beca's battered heart a tiny bit.
"Yeah," Beca pushes herself to her feet and helps Chloe up, "If I had been told I was going home with such a hot chick, I would have tidied up the place a little bit."
Chloe smiles, and even though it doesn't quite reach her eyes, Beca feels the tension in the atmosphere loosen. She wraps an arm around Chloe's waist and leads her outside, finding Jesse and Aubrey on their way, who drive them back to Beca's place. The ride is silent, and Beca whispers her thanks to the couple for dropping them off, thankful that they don't ask anything. Beca makes a note to herself to text them later to explain.
Once inside, Beca makes she and Chloe some herbal tea and places the mugs on the coffee table before joining Chloe on the couch.
"Do you want to talk about what happened?" Beca asks cautiously, her hand finding Chloe's back. It settles between Chloe's shoulder blades, thumb moving back and forth over her top.
Chloe takes a sip from her tea and cradles the mug in both hands before speaking, "I was having fun dancing with Aubrey, until some guy came up behind me and-and whispered something crass in my ear. I was about to turn around and tell him to fuck off but then- "she pauses and swallows. "He pressed himself against me and his hand squeezed my hip."
Beca remains silent, allowing Chloe to take her time to find her words.
"That- that's something Greg did to show me he had control and it-it triggered something inside of me. Suddenly I was back in New York and I couldn't get out. And then I don't remember anything until you started to sing in the bathroom." Chloe sighs in frustration, pushing her hair away from her face. "I-I thought I was better, I thought I was past this."
"It's okay," Beca scoots closer and presses a kiss to Chloe's temple. "You're still much better than before. What you experienced was PTSD and there's not much you can do to stop it. Your mind reacted to something that brought utter fear within you and it still needs some time to realize that you're not in danger anymore. It needs some time to heal."
Chloe nods and tilts her head toward Beca, "Why are you so good to me?"
Beca smiles softly and cups Chloe's cheek, her thumb grazing her cheekbone. Chloe grasps Beca's wrist between her fingers, while leaning into the arch of Beca's palm. Their gestures feel so intimate that it makes Beca's throat tighten. She's not sure she can resist the temptation to just close the gap between them and kiss her. "Because you're Chloe. You embody sunshine and kindness and you deserve the best that can be given. So that's what I'm trying to do."
Beca is not sure how many times she's played the next second in her head over the last few months. Soft, full lips brush against hers and her heart is suddenly about to beat out of her chest. Every part of her body tenses at first, before melting into the kiss and tilting her head to move her lips swiftly along Chloe's.
Her fingertips are burning to tug Chloe closer, but then this stupid part of her brain remembers what Chloe said about relationships and her breathing stills.
"Chloe..." Beca whispers against Chloe's lips as she wrenches herself away, her eyes still closed, scared that if she opens them, Chloe might have vanished. She drops her hand from Chloe's jaw and instantly misses the warmth. "I don't know what this means, but I know that If it's just a thing for you, I can't do that-"
"I love you," Chloe interrupts, her voice rock steady. Beca's eyes fly open, her insecure and dark blue orbs meeting Chloe's crystal-clear ones. Her breathing is on stand-by and she's about to pinch herself to make sure her mind hasn't escaped into another one of her fantasies. "Ever since we saw each other again in New-York, I've had these feelings resurging and seizing my heart so fiercely that I haven't felt that way in a long time,"
Chloe hesitates, as though weighing her words, and Beca squeezes her knee lightly in encouragement, although she is trying very hard not to leap into Chloe's arms and kiss her senseless like she has wanted to since their lunch in NY.
"I've been cautious ever since I moved here. I didn't want to lunge into something with you without knowing for sure if I was ready. You're so important to me, Bec, and I couldn't imagine jeopardizing our friendship over my urges. And it wouldn't have been fair to you. But lately, this," she waves a hand between them both. "has become what I strive for. I want us. I want to be with you."
Beca felt her lungs stopped working for a beat or two. She exhales, closing her eyes briefly. "Goddamit, you have no idea how long I've wanted to hear that," Beca tentatively leans forward, ghosting her lips over Chloe's, drawing a sigh from the redhead. "I love you, too, Chlo."
She feels Chloe smile against her mouth and closes the space between them, catching Chloe's lips with hers. Unlike their first kiss back during their last night at Barden, this one is precise, patient and gentle as if both women want to remember every detail of it.
Chloe moans when Beca sweeps her tongue across her bottom lip, and parts her own to let her in. Beca feels a familiar pull in her stomach when their tongues touch, a testament that everything is very real. She moves closer to the other woman, wrapping her arms around her back. Chloe deepens the kiss, her own arms snaking around Beca's neck, and presses her body against the DJ's.
They barely break apart to take a breath, and Beca switches positions so that she's straddling Chloe. Their rhythm becomes more urgent, as though they want to make up for lost time. Chloe runs her hand down Beca's side, lightly grazing the underside of her breast, and settles it onto Beca's hips, palm curling around her hipbone.
Chloe's lips leave Beca's and find a sensitive spot on her neck, which has Beca cursing and her hips bucking to meet Chloe's, drawing a moan out of both girls. Beca's blinded by a white light beneath her closed eyelids as Chloe bites her neck and smooths the sting with her tongue.
Chloe's mouth works her way down her neck and chest, until it's obstructed by the brunette's shirt. Beca feels her fingers tease the hem of her shirt and her brain is suddenly screaming at her not to do anything reckless.
"Wait, wait, wait," she says breathlessly, cupping Chloe's face and meeting her eyes. Strands of hair fall in front of her eyes and Chloe pushes them back behind Beca's ear. Beca is slightly taken aback by how dark Chloe's eyes have turned with lust. It makes something snap inside of her, and she can feel her own control rapidly slipping out of reach.
Beca's voice is laced with hope and apprehension, "As much as I want to continue this, are you sure?"
Chloe doesn't miss a beat, "Never been so sure of anything in my life, Bec," she punctuates her words with a kiss that leaves Beca light-headed. "Now can I take your shirt off?"
Beca nods and her shirt is pulled over her head, and she's quick to work on Chloe's shirt buttons, though her trembling fingers struggle with the last one. She slips her hand past the open garment and grazes her fingers over the bra, before her hands travel to Chloe's shoulder and push the cotton back.
She kisses Chloe's jaw and neck, lightly sucking, encouraged by the sounds escaping Chloe's mouth. Beca feels heat spreading in the pit of her stomach, her desire quickly growing into something she won't be able to tame.
"Bec," Chloe whimpers, her hands all over the brunette's skin, carressing, discovering. Beca pushes her to lay down on the couch, and finds the zipper of her skirt, pulling it down and taking it off Chloe, which results in a light struggle given their position. As Chloe lies there in her underwear, hair tousled and hooded blue eyes, Beca feels her chest soar. As if feeling shy under Beca's hungry gaze, Chloe moves her arms to cover herself slightly, but Beca shakes her head and grabs Chloe's hands, pushing them away.
"You're so beautiful," she murmurs, bending down to kiss her lightly, then her neck, the valley of her breast and her stomach. She takes her time, trying to print out every curve and dip, as if Chloe's body was a map she wants to know by heart. She needs to taste and touch her everywhere.
Beca swirls her tongue around her navel and pauses when she reaches the waistband of Chloe's underwear. The last thing she wants is to rush this, so she kisses her way back up, taking her time to explore the woman's body. She kisses every scar she finds on her way up, some of which she has already seen and knows their story, some of them unknown to her, but for which she can guess the origin.
She pauses on a fresh one, which she knows was caused by Greg's hands, just atop her left shoulder. Beca can't help it but look back into Chloe's eyes, uncertainty clouding her own. Her fingers still on Chloe's waist, and she tries to control her breathing before she speaks.
"Are you sure?" she finds herself asking again. "I-I don't want us to do anything you might regret."
"Yes, Beca, I'm sure," Chloe enunciates slowly, cupping Beca's jaw, "Now shut up and kiss me,"
Beca doesn't need to be told twice. She reconnects her lips with Chloe's, more eagerly this time, and feels utterly drunk with desire for the redhead. She works her way around Chloe's back and unhooks her bra in a swift move, tossing it blindly onto the floor. Chloe's wandering hands make it difficult for Beca to focus on her task, even more so when she feels a squeeze to her backside, the motion fusing their hips together.
"Fuck," Beca bites her bottom lip and rocks her hips against Chloe's once more. She bends down and kisses her left breast, circling the nipple before taking it into her mouth. Chloe arches her back, throwing her head back against the arm of the couch as her fingers run through Beca's hair, lightly tugging.
Beca pulls her focus to the other breast, while her hand sweeps over Chloe's toned stomach and disappears between her legs, her fingers grazing her center over the lacy material. Chloe's hips buck up, one of her thigh wedging itself between Beca's legs and brushing oh so beautifully against a certain spot. Beca's legs quiver as she growls under her breath, dragging her teeth over Chloe's nipple and biting perhaps a bit harshly, judging from the surprised gasp that leaves Chloe's mouth. Beca runs her tongue over the sting, inhaling sharply when Chloe's thigh rubs against her.
"Chlo," She breathes out, dropping her forehead to Chloe's chest, her hips grinding on Chloe's leg on their own accord. She loses herself in a slow dance of their hips, arousal pumping through her veins, deafened by the thumping sound of her own heartbeat in her ears.
"You're wearing far too many clothes," Chloe rasps out, hands working on unfastening Beca's jeans. Beca stands for a second on wobbly legs to shimmy her way out of them and kneels back on the couch, a little farther than before.
Beca knows what she is doing. She has been with a fair number of girls over the last few years, and has mastered the art of bringing them over the edge. She knows she is a skilled lover. But this time is very different. This is Chloe. She has waited for this moment for so long, that she's nervous about not giving Chloe the amount of love that she deserves.
Slowly, shaky fingers drag the last piece of clothing past Chloe's hips and down her legs. Beca kisses Chloe's ankle as it sits on her shoulder, and ever so slowly makes her way back to where Chloe wants her the most.
When her lips close around Chloe's sensitive numb, Chloe isn't able to form any word, a loud moan tumbling past her lips instead. She gasps, her back arching off the couch once more. The brunette lets out a moan of her own, swirling her tongue over wet heat while her thumb works skilled circles over her clit.
She pauses and kisses her way back up, one finger pushing into Chloe's silky heat. She silences Chloe's moans with a bruising kiss, retracting her finger briefly to add a second one, and watches with hooded eyes as Chloe's orgasm starts to build, eyes rolling to the back of her head as Beca's name drops from her parted lips.
Beca quickens the rhythm and when she feels Chloe starting to tighten around her, she pushes her thumb over her clit in rhythm with the movement of her fingers.
Judging from her erratic breathing and the moans escaping her mouth Beca knows Chloe is close and she grazes her earlobe with her teeth, "Let go, baby."
With a final curl of her fingers, Beca's name tumbles out of Chloe's mouth, a small cry getting stuck in her throat as her body spams. The orgasm washes over her whole body and Beca shudders when the sight alone shoots a spike of desire to her core.
She cups Chloe's face with her other hand and kisses her lazily, swiping her tongue along her bottom lip. It takes a few seconds for Chloe to respond, but then she whimpers and deepens the kiss, which prompts Beca to place her hand back where it was just a second ago. Chloe gasps into the kiss and Beca swiftly goes down, until her mouth is tasting her, and it isn't long until Chloe topples over the edge, but Beca's right there to catch her.
A sob accompanies her climax, and Beca can feel Chloe's legs shake against her. She crawls back to Chloe's level and settles on her side, gathering Chloe into her arms. She places gentle kisses on Chloe's face as the redhead comes down with a soft sigh.
The brunette brushes Chloe's hair away from her sticky forehead and wraps an arm around her, the tips of her fingers running up and down her spine, goosebumps erupting along their trail. Chloe's eyes are still closed and her breathing is just coming back to normal, but Beca can feel Chloe's heart race against her body.
"Are you still alive?" she teases, placing a kiss to juncture where Chloe's neck and shoulder meet. Chloe only whimpers in reply, and Beca chuckles, the corners of her lips sharpening into a smile, "I love you."
She feels something running down her shoulder and casts her eyes downward, catching a tear escaping Chloe's eye.
"Hey, hey," Beca says softly, cupping Chloe's face so she can look at her properly. Her heart drops into her stomach at the possibility that she might have been too forward, or worse, too rough. "What is it? Did I hurt you? God, I-"
She frowns when Chloe lets out a small watery laugh. About to ask what is so funny, she is interrupted by Chloe's lips on hers. "You didn't hurt me, quite the opposite. It's just, it's been such a long time since I've felt this way."
Beca's heart slows back down to a normal rhythm, "Happy?"
Chloe shakes her head, "Loved."
Beca feels a strange feeling settle in her chest; she can't decide if it's sadness or pride. Part of her feels sad because Chloe deserved much more than how she has been treated over the last few years, and the other part feels proud; proud to be able to make Chloe happy, because that has been Beca's ultimate goal lately.
The brunette doesn't know how to respond to that, so she settles on kissing Chloe's temple, letting her lips rest against her warm skin for a while. Feeling Chloe shudder against her body, she blindly reaches for the blanket draped on the back of the couch and covers them both with it.
It's not long before Chloe's breathing evens out, and Beca watches her for a moment, making sure to get that image printed in her mind as if to convince it it's still very real, before she drifts off to sleep as well.
Beca wakes up the next morning a bit disoriented. The surface she is lying on is far less comfortable than the silk sheets on her own bed -yes, she owns silk sheets because she can afford them, and they are fucking amazing-, and most importantly, void of any sign of Chloe.
Beca rubs her eyes until she is sure she can open them without squinting at the harsh light coming from the bay windows. She realizes she's just in her underwear, having thrown her bra off before falling asleep, because really, who in their right mind would sleep with their bra on. She stretches her arm out and grabs a shirt, shrugging it on before realizing it's Chloe's as it's a bit bigger than what she owns.
She hears some noise coming from the kitchen and gets up to investigate, hoping to find her girlfriend (hopefully Chloe's now her girlfriend, and the words alone make Beca swoon) and not some stray animal like a racoon or something. Right, because a racoon could get through her house security system.
She pauses in the doorway, arms crossed over her chest, a smirk on her lips as she watches Chloe cook breakfast. The latter doesn't have any pants on, just her underwear and a hoodie -Beca's- and is humming to the song on the radio, moving her body to Shame, shame, shame.
Beca wants to make fun of her for jamming it out to a song from the eighties, but she finds it extremely endearing.
"Nice moves," Beca calls out softly, knowing by now that it's better to announce her presence rather than sneak up on Chloe.
Chloe stops abruptly, looking over her shoulder and flashing Beca a smile that makes the brunette weak in the knees.
It's only morning, and Beca's arousal is through the roof already, something that probably has to do with watching Chloe orgasm twice last night, which turned her on to no ends, and not getting off herself. Not that she complains; last night was about Chloe, and Beca has waited five years for that moment, so she can be a little more patient.
"Thanks," Chloe says, her chipper voice pulling Beca back down to earth and to her kitchen, where Chloe is staring at her with a curious look. The DJ pads the rest of the way to the other woman and stands awkwardly next to her, leaning her hip against the countertop.
Chloe looks at her through her eyelashes, teeth lightly tugging on her bottom lip, making Beca almost lose it right there. Chloe is the one to make the first move, much like the night before, as she closes the scant distance between them to catch Beca's lips in a long and slow kiss that leaves Beca short of breath. "Good morning."
"Mmm," Beca moans, brushing her nose against Chloe's. "I'll say."
Chloe rolls her eyes and swats her arm lightly, squealing in surprise when Beca pins her gently against the countertop and steals another kiss. They stand there for God knows how long, lazily making-out in the kitchen without a care in the world. Well, until whatever Chloe was cooking starts to burn, making them break apart to hastily turn off the stove.
The bacon is especially crispy that morning.
Yay! Only took 14 chapters so I decided to reward y'all for your patience with a bit more than just a kiss. ;) So I was kinda nervous about this chapter? Writing smut doesn't come naturally haha. Hope you liked it. Thoughts are always appreciated.