Chapter 14

Gwen crept past the knights guarding the door and into the chambers she shared with Arthur. It had been another excruciatingly long day. It was funny, really. When she had been a servant she thought that being King or Queen meant lying around in beautiful clothes and indolently telling other people what to do. How wrong she had been! Her back ached and her hand was cramped from writing missives all day. Keeping in touch with their allies kept those alliances strong and couldn't be delayed while Arthur was...ill. Speaking of her husband, Gwen padded silently across the room to stand over the bed, looking down at his sleeping form. He looked so innocent. But even asleep she could see the dark circles under his sunken eyes. He wasn't eating and had lost so much weight in the past months.

Staring at him, Gwen finally hit her breaking point. She couldn't run this kingdom by herself any longer. She deserved help! She deserved her husband back! Before she could really even think about what she was doing her hand flew out and, Crack! She slapped Arthur right across the face. The sharp pain in her hand must have been nothing compared to what Arthur felt. He yelled and sat up in bed, reaching for where he usually kept his sword on the bedside. But it hadn't been there for some time. Merlin had been the one to make certain Arthur always had Excalibur at arm's reach.

"What is going on! What was that?" Arthur sputtered, coming fully awake.

"That. Arthur Pendragon. Was your wife! And if you don't want another one I suggest you sit there, shut up, and listen to what I have to say!" Gwen was shaking. Was it in fear, or rage, or giddy relief? Even she didn't know.

"Why did you change the laws of Camelot to knight low born men like my brother?"

Arthur was confused. She woke him up for this? She knew this already. But he answered anyway. "Because regardless of their birth, they exemplified the knightly virtues that define a real champion of Camelot. The law was wrong. It was the right thing to do."

Gwen nodded. "And why did you change the laws of Camelot to marry me?"

Without hesitation, Arthur responded. "Because you are everything a Queen of Camelot should be. Kind, Generous, Wise, and Strong. And I love you. No law or tradition could change the fact that you belong at my side."

Gwen smiled brilliantly down at Arthur. He was so incredible. "Arthur, my husband, my love. Do you regret any of those choices?"

"No," came the immediate denial. "Every day I see how those laws were wrong and Camelot is a better place for you and the knights being at its heart."

"Arthur. Does Merlin deserve anything less?"

Stunned, Arthur shook his head. Refusing to acknowledge what he already knew.

Gwen got angry. "Arthur you made a mistake. Admit it. Admit it right now. It's just you and me here and you need to say it! This has gone on too long. So out with it!" Standing there with her hands on her hips, her curls escaping their careful confinement, Arthur thought she looked like an avenging forest sprite.

Arthur considered playing dumb. It worked with most people. But looking into Gwen's fierce eyes he knew that she always saw right through him. It had never done him any good to try to deceive his wife. She was the heart of him and couldn't be lied to. Not by him. But this. It hurt so much! Saying it? No, he wouldn't.

Setting his jaw mulishly, he started to deny her request. Gwen gave a cry of rage and frustration and, Crack! She slapped him again! When had his sweet Gwen become a shrieking virago? Who was this violent creature?

"Arthur Pendragon, look at yourself! Is this who you are? A drunk? A man who shirks his responsibilities? No! You are the King of Camelot and you will act like it, dammit!"

Gwen was crying. She was yelling at him and she was crying. Tears were streaming down her beloved face. That, more than anything else, pushed him over the edge. He could do whatever he wanted to himself, he didn't care. But this was affecting his Gwen. He could finally see that.

Sitting on the edge of the bed, Arthur took Gwen's hand and pulled her close until she was standing between his legs. He looked up into her compassionate eyes and gently wiped away her tears.

"I know why Merlin stayed here. I know why a powerful warlock endured years of being my servant. Gwen, I think I always knew. It's love, isn't it?"

Gwen beamed through the remaining tears. "Yes my dear. I believe you're right. Camelot is a family. And a family is built on love."

"I should never have exiled Merlin." Arthur sighed heavily, "I should have rescinded the ban on magic. Merlin deserved better, you're right. I have made a terrible mistake and I fear that we shall never see Merlin again." He continued raggedly, "And I don't know what to do."

Finally.

Gwen pulled Arthur close and wrapped her arms around him tightly. Breaking down, Arthur curled into her comforting embrace and cried like he hadn't since the day his father died.

The days that followed were like a dream. Free from the years of lies and secrets, Merlin and Morgana desperately made up for lost time. "Merlin how were you able to keep this a secret? Now that I know, I can't believe I ever couldn't tell. Your power is so strong that you fairly vibrate with it. It's so apparent. How could Arthur honestly not have known? How did you masquerade as a servant?"

Merlin laughed. "It wasn't a masquerade! I really worked as his manservant! I certainly used my powers when I could, but serving him was still backbreaking work!" Sobering up, he continued. "I worked very hard to keep it a secret. Arthur has a great destiny. He is to unite the lands of Albion and lead us all into a golden age. My job is to keep him safe and ensure that he fulfills that destiny. And that meant staying close by his side. I did what I had to." He said modestly.

Morgana gently touched his face, looking up at the man. "That can't have been easy for you. You must have felt so alone."

Nodding, he replied. "It's been hard, yes. Every day I left before Gaius woke up and worked for Arthur all day. Keeping close to his side and protecting him. When he retired for the evening I would go back to Gaius and work with him in the evenings. I'm still his apprentice, after all. Then once Gaius retired to bed I would study magic on my own. I'll tell you, Morgana. I've actually had more rest since my exile than I had in years."

"Tell me what happened. Please"

"It was our own fault. Arthur and I were horsing around, training and we went back to Gaius's chambers for muscle salves. We crashed into the room like children. We didn't know that Gaius was up on a tall ladder. We knocked over a shelf and his ladder toppled. He was falling. Morgana, he would have died. I didn't think. Didn't react. I just saved him. And Arthur nearly killed me on the spot."

For love. Merlin had revealed himself after nearly ten years of secrecy for love. Of course he had. Morgana knew him now. Knew that yes that is exactly the sort of man he was. "You saved his life. I know how much Gaius means to you. You did the right thing."

Merlin sage a small laugh. "I know. I don't regret the act, thought I do regret the audience. Gwen and Arthur were both there. They both saw. Arthur could have killed me. Well he could have tried. But he didn't. He had me arrested instead. I sat in the dungeon for several days, waiting for word that I was to be executed. But something else happened instead. He gave me. Well essentially it was a trial. But Morgana, the Knights. They all stood up for me. To a man they did. Mordred even tried to give me a way to feign that I hadn't known about my magic. But I knew the time for lies was over. And so I told Arthur the truth. About protecting him for all these year. About always having magic. Being born with it. Instead of execution he exiled me. In a way I'm grateful. Lies are so heavy. They weigh us down so terribly. So I left Camelot. And I went in search of a seer who could help me find a way to continue to protect Arthur even if I couldn't be in Camelot."

"The woman who gave you the gifts?" Morgana asked astutely.

Merlin nodded in agreement. "Yes, Vadoma. She leads an incredible tribe. I thought they were Druids but they are from much, much farther away. They are an amazing people. I think you would like them, actually. When I met with her she told me that Albion is incomplete, Camelot is incomplete. And that I myself am incomplete. She bade me to reforge myself in order to move forward. Reminded me of those I love that were lost to me. Told me that those parts of me were missing. That's how I came here to Ealdor. This was the only place left where someone I loved was still available to me. And imagine my surprise when along with my Mother, I found you here!" Merlin held Morgana's hands and continued. "She was so right. Without you in my life I wasn't a whole man. It's our friendships that make us strong and without you I was weakened. I'm grateful that we've had the chance to find one another again, Morgana. I missed you terribly."

"I missed you, too. I thought that leaving Camelot would make me stronger, and my power has grown. But Merlin, it weakened me. Weakened my defenses against evil, against darkness. Without those I loved I didn't have the strength to resist. I became a monster. I see that now. So we came to Ealdor. Merlin, your mother, she is the most amazing woman. She healed my wounds, gave me love, acceptance, a home. But then you were back and I thought it was all over. That I would have to fight again. But instead. Well here we are, aren't we. And I feel like I've remembered who I am supposed to be. My petty revenge against Camelot. How childish and stupid I was. You can't correct a wrong with another wrong. That isn't the way. I know now. I know that the way to restore magic to Camelot is through love."

Putting their powers to good use, they finished the addition to the cottage in just a few days. Talking and getting to know each other again. Finally honest with each other. Merlin and Morgana desperately tried to make up for lost time, telling each other of nearly every detail they'd missed in each other's lives, teaching each other everything they knew about magic. They comforted one another over their losses. Cheered each other's victories. It was idyllic and perfect.

Their combined powers were frighteningly strong and they were able to grow new furniture from young saplings in a matter of hours. They completely refurnished the entire house. Relishing in the ability to freely use their magic and to test their limits.

Looking with satisfaction at the now completed cottage. Morgana looked around and thought that something was still missing. "Merlin it's so bare. So barren. How about those panels you have in the stables. Since you're moving into the house could we use those to decorate in here?"

Merlin readily agreed and the two lugged in all of his packs. He hadn't really examined their contents and didn't know what he would find. Inside there were luxurious silk wall panels, draperies, and blankets. Fine silver dishes and platters. Riches to make a King blush with their decadence. Morgana and Merlin both found it to be perfectly appropriate for Hunith to have a home fit for a queen and used nearly everything they found.

While Morgana was hanging drapes in her new chambers, Merlin called to her from the front room. Entering the room she saw he was holding up several silk dresses. "I think these look perfect for you," he said shyly. "If you want them."

Morgana squealed and hugged him when she saw the fine silk. "Oh Merlin! They're beautiful!" He was so generous! Looking up at him, Morgana thought again how amazing this man was.

"Their beauty pales in comparison to yours." Merlin said softly, looking into Morgana's hypnotic green eyes. As always he felt he could drown in them. He wasn't referring to her physical appearance. He was talking about the heart of her. That spark that made her his precious Morgana. Her strength, her ferocity, her tender heart. Whispering now, he continued. "Morgana Pendragon, I've fallen in love with you."

Morgana looked at the man he was, deep inside to the very heart of him. Merlin. Looking at her with his deep blue eyes. Eyes that pulled at her. Drawing her into their depths, making her feel as if she were floating in an endless sea. She belonged here. Belonged in his strong arms. Not because she needed a man. But because this was the one person who made her feel complete. She had been missing her other half. They fit together perfectly. On a sigh she said, "Merlin. My darling, wonderful, amazing Merlin. You haven't fallen alone. I love you."

His eyes closing, Merlin leaned in and gently touched his lips to hers. Morgana's entire body came alive. She closed her eyes and held him more tightly, pressing her lips firmly against his. With that, it was as if a fire had ignited within them. An inferno that rushed through them both, burning away the past, leaving only this moment. The two sorcerers crashed against each other, their lips clinging, their bodies molding together. A lifeline in a sea of raw need. There were no words. There was no need for them. There was only this moment, this fire, this passion, this love. Tearing desperately at each other's clothes, they tumbled into the new chamber, fell onto the bed they had created with their combined magic only hours before.