A/T: Hope you all enjoyed the Easter Holiday! Here is the next chapter.

As always I would like to thank all of you for reading, reviewing and waiting patiently for this story

Enjoy!

The pain killers that the doctor gave Kensi before the darkness fell seemed to work, as just a few minutes later she fell into a deep sleep.

Callen never left her side all night, remaining there as a constant guard.

Yes, he loved Kensi, but he knew Deeks was the one who should be here by her side; not him. No matter how much he had begged him, Deeks had refused to pay another visit at the hospital. Watching her in the arms of Jack was just too damn difficult.

Even when Callen called him to inform him that Jack told Kensi the truth, he found it hard to be in the same room as her.

Hours went by quickly and Kensi seemed to have a peaceful night's sleep until the first rays of sun snuck through the curtains.

"Good morning," Callen stood up to check on her.

"Hey! Is it morning already?" Kensi rubbed her sleepy eyes.

"Yes. I checked with the doctor and you are good to go. The nurses removed your IV while you were sleeping. Hetty has arranged one of the base nurses to accompany us back home. You know….to check on you during the flight."

"So, I can get up now?" she slowly lifted herself from the bed as Callen placed his hand on her back .

"Just…take it easy ok? You still have fever, your wrists are all bandaged, you have cracked ribs and your head wound needs care," he took her hand and helped her stand up.

"Well, don't worry. I am not going to run a mile. I just want to get dressed. I hate this hospital gown."

"Oh," Callen took one step back in embarrassment "yeah….I probably should call one of the nurses for that….I am not the right person to….yeah….don't move. I'll call the nurse."

Kensi laughed and sat back on the bed. So, that was it. She was going back home. Where was home really? Did she even live in the same apartment that she remembered? She should be feeling relieved to leave this terrible place, but to her surprised she felt scared. Scared of the unknown.

Within seconds a nurse walked in and helped Kensi change into the sweat pants they had provided her with. The slightest move she made caused her whole body to react in pain. What the hell did that terrorist do to her anyway to make her feel like this?

It took her longer than expected, but finally she was free from the gown. She took one last look around the room before leaving, just to make sure she wasn't forgetting anything behind. But here was nothing there. She let out a deep sigh and walked out of the room, ready to embrace the unknown.

Even though she refused to walk out of the hospital in a wheel chair, Callen made it perfectly clear that she had no choice. He practically forced her to sit down.

The moment she walked out of the hospital, she put on her brightest smile hoping that it was Deeks who had come to pick them up and drive them to the airport. To her disappointment though, it was only Sam and soon her smile faded away.

"Did you expect someone else Kens?" Sam laughed.

"No!" Kensi shook her head trying to hide her chagrin. "Just get me out of here!"

She remained silent during the whole ride to the airport, and neither Callen nor Sam dared to ask her anything. They both knew Deeks was the only one who could help her.

All they could do was wait for their second reunion.

By the time they stepped into the private jet Granger had provided them, Deeks had already boarded, and he was sitting quietly on a seat next to the window. He heard Kensi's voice as she was climbing the stairs but he fought his urge to run to her. On the contrary, he remained seated as she walked past him and barely took a glimpse at her.

Even when she stopped for a brief moment next to him, seeking for his look. Even then, he didn't look back.

She opened he mouth but no words could come out. She wanted to tell him she was sorry for the way she reacted, but he didn't seem to care. So, she swallowed her pride and sat all alone far away from him. She even refused the company of the nurse who only placed the IV line on her hand again because the flight was too long and her body still needed the antibiotics.

Deeks was glad Kensi had decided to sit on the front seats of the plane. That way, they would avoid awkward looks and conversations.

He could only see the top of her head and all he wanted to do was stroke her hair and kiss her forehead. Promise her that everything would be fine. But he didn't. Instead, he preferred to remain seated and look for one last time the endless desert of Afghanistan as the plane took off.

He didn't want to think. He didn't want memories of his brother as a child haunt his mind. He didn't want memories of Kensi reminding him of what he'd lost. All he wanted to do was close his eyes and let his mind go blank and somehow erase these past months

"Why are you doing this to her?" Sam's soft voice suddenly startled him and forced him to open his eyes again.

"Doing what? I don't know what you mean," Deeks cleared his throat.

"I think you do." Sam sat next to him and his eyes pointed at Kensi.

Deeks let out a deep breath and looked outside the window once again. "I am not doing anything. I am simply giving her the space she needs."

"What if she doesn't need space? What if she needs her partner to help her come back?"

"I can't do that," Deeks shook his head "I don't think I can handle this anymore. I killed my brother for that woman, and she doesn't even remember me."

"Well, make her remember you," Sam prompted him.

"I don't have the strength anymore Sam. It took me four years to make her…" he paused for a moment "to make her love me. I can't go through all of it again. I am not resistant anymore. "

Sam smiled at the sound of the word "love". That was the first time that Deeks used that word to describe his relationship with Kensi. "Don't give up. She still loves you. She just doesn't know it yet so help her remember it. You know Kensi better than anyone. You are the only person who can help her find herself."

"What if the Kensi I knew is long gone and this new version of her sees me as just her partner?"

"I don't believe that for a second. She may have lost her memory, but her heart remains the same. Don't abandon her. She needs you now more than ever. She is lost."

"I am sorry, I can't do this," Deeks tried to fight back the tears "I can't force her to like me. I can't force her to love me. This situation is difficult for her, but you keep forgetting how difficult it is for me as well. She lost her memory but sooner or later it will all come back. I lost a part of myself back there. I lost a part of my soul and I will never get it back."

"I thought we've already been through this Deeks" Sam tried to keep his voice level to hide his increasing frustration "If you hadn't killed Max, we would be transferring Kensi's dead body right now. Max was a terrorist who showed no remorse. I am sorry to be so blunt about it, but he deserved to die. Did you read Kensi's medical file?"

Deeks shook his head.

"Well I did. Repeatedly. And trust me when I say this, it's a good thing she doesn't remember what that bastard did to her. If you have any doubts about killing him, read the damn file. Read what your brother did to your partner, and tell me you wouldn't pull the trigger again."

"It looks like we agree on something," Deeks turned his gaze form the window and looked at Sam.

"What is that?"

"Part of me is glad she doesn't remember. I am glad she doesn't remember me, because it makes it easier for me to end our…thing before either of us gets hurt."

"What are you talking about?" Sam looked at him confused.

"Let's be honest. We…..Kensi and I…..it wouldn't work out. An office romance is always a bad idea, especially in our line of work. Passion should never rule our minds and navigate our choices. It was fun in the beginning. Circling each other…you know, playing the game. But the price of the victory is something I can't bare. This is the perfect opportunity to end this game. "

"You can't play with her mind Deeks. She is going to remember sooner or later, and trust me. She is going to be pissed at you for lying to her, manipulating her, betraying her!"

"Not if I make her believe that we are just partners," he bluntly responded.

"You are going to brainwash her? Are you serious? This isn't a game as you call it Deeks. This is life. " Sam was getting angrier at him by the second, to the point where Callen had to join the conversation to check on the commotion.

"What is going on here?" he asked worried.

"Ask him!" Sam got up as he knew that he was close to physically hurting Deeks for speaking those words.

But Deeks didn't answer. Instead he turned his gaze back to the window ostentatiously ignoring both Callen and Sam. He was in no mood to repeat himself. He had made his mind and no one could affect his choice. Yes, it hurt like hell giving up on Kensi, but in his mind it was for the best. Life was so much easier during the first steps of their partnership and he longed for that normality.

He took one last glimpse at Kensi's still form before closing his eyes and surrendering himself to sleep.

If he had paid a closer attention though, he would have noticed that Kensi was nothing but still. She was trying hard to control her sobs as she had heard every single bit of that conversation. Deeks and Sam were not as quiet as they thought they were.

She couldn't explain why, but hearing that Deeks was more than willing to give up on her, hurt her more than she expected. Now she knew why she felt so drawn to that man. She loved him. She didn't actually know him, yet she loved him. But apparently he didn't love her enough and chose not to fight for her.

Why? Why did it hurt so much? She didn't feel so desperate and heartbroken when Jack told her the truth. Why did her heart only want to obey that shaggy blonde detective.

She hated this feeling of despair.

If their "relationship" hurt so much now, what would it do to her once she got her memory back? Suddenly, ignorance seemed like a salvation. Her heart was aching, but her mind could not explain why.

After all, maybe it was for the best!