Author's Note: Another spit in Gustafa's hat with this one, hence the double-post. You know, I wouldn't mind being proposed to one day with a blue feather. Call me a geek, but I think it'd be a sweet gesture since I love the games so much. Besides, who needs a gaudy engagement ring? I'd just lose the damn thing...

--

Chapter 14: One Last Push

"Tanya, there's something I wanted to ask you..."

No, that wouldn't do. Too cliched...

"Tanya, your father..."

No, she told me to quit thinking about the past.

"Tanya, please accept this feather..."

No, that sounded desperate.

"Tanya, I know I'm an old man, but..."

Hell no.

I had been standing in front of the mirror for the past week trying to get the words right. The setting would be perfect as would the engagement blue feather, but without the words... everything else was pointless. If I couldn't say it just right, then I couldn't go through with proposing. My newfound pride wouldn't allow it. So I started again.

"Tanya..."

--

"Taka, guess what?" she asked merrily, her voice bright as the spring day.

"Hmm?" I responded, my mind drifting off elsewhere to some time ahead (I could only hope it happened soon). We were out in the field again while I rested on my hoe and she carefully planted a watermelon seed. My stamina had increased steadily working in the gardens with her. No longer was I just the man who cared for the livestock's needs, but I'd become a well-rounded farmer though animals remained my forte.

"The calf was born this morning!"

"Really?" Well, I had been experienced in it... Seemed the birth slipped my mind beneath all the fluffy thoughts that had replaced concerns over Lilac and her calf. "Well then, is it a bull?"

"Yeah!"

"Did you name it Ferdinand?" I teased in a mockingly serious tone.

She laughed, replying, "No! His name's Benny, and he sure as hell isn't interested in sniffing flowers!"

"Lilac's a flower," I noted with a grin. "You can bet he'll be sniffing her when the time comes."

A look of horror crossed her face as she spat, "But that's his mom!"

--

The day was leaving me in the dust. Although I had hoped my chance would come soon enough, I was disappointed to find it came a bit too quick. I still hadn't found the words I needed to express how I felt. Yet again, I found myself strolling alone through the valley aimlessly. I had tried to sort all the emotions out while standing idly on the beach, blue feather in hand, and I had sat there studying it for some time before shuffling back towards the farm. Evening was falling into night, I observed.

A sweet melody drifted my way, and I glanced over to the fanciful yurt perched on a gently sloping hillside. The gnome in his green hat was playing a peaceful melody while the last rays of the sunset shone on the strings of his guitar. He exuded confidence without arrogance. I had learned to admire that in him.

"Nice song," I complimented him flatly. He didn't seem to notice the indifference since he most likely heard something quite similar out of a certain woman. He merely smiled.

"Thanks, man. It's just for my own enjoyment is all. Need to sit a spell?"

"Yeah, something like that," I agreed, easing myself onto the stump. Gustafa was excellent at reading people. A part of me envied that though with someone as open as Tanya, I didn't need the ability. Nami was lucky to have a man with so much insight for herself. There were times I doubted she could know her own thoughts without his interpretation.

"I'll give you an ear if you need me to lend one," he offered, setting down his guitar to give me his undivided attention. I had to wonder, not for the first time, what lay behind the beetle shades. When he looked at a man like me, what did he see? A stranger who spent his days living off the land, or a welcomed friend and neighbor he could offer guidance to? I was sure it was the latter, knowing what little I did of him. He genuinely cared about people, and he was always willing to be there for those he considered friends of his. It was a good thing to be a part of.

Grateful for someone to listen to my insecurities, I began nervously. "Well, you see, I... There's Tanya... and then there's me... and a blue feather."

He grinned and replied, "That's great, man."

"It will be... once I gather what I want to say to the woman," I confessed sheepishly. "I'm not like you, Gustafa. Words... they escape me. You may be able to put them together and make something beautiful, but for me... they fall out in a jumbled mess of things. There's no order to them..."

Picking up his guitar once again and tuning the instrument, he thought on what I'd said. At last, while toying with the strings, he shared his view on it, "Takakura, I never put words in order. They end up that way because I let them. When the lyrics come into a song, I have very little to do with it. Nature's my muse, and the melodies form themselves. I only lend my voice to them." Like a prophet, he sat legs crossed and back straight as he spoke these all-knowing words to me. He would be one hell of a preacher...

"What should I tell her then?" I asked in desperation. "How can I tell her how I feel?"

Taking a hand to his hat, he lifted the felt fabric away to scratch his head. I tried not to gawk as I came to realize the man was bald on top. He chose not to show any notice my short-lived stare although I saw a slight blush across his cheeks. After placing the hat back over his bare dome, he replied, "How do you feel?"

"I-I..."

Gustafa smiled once again and slid his shades down his long nose. I was met with two blue eyes, more intense than Nami's ever could be. They laughed kindly at me as he told me in his worldly wise way, "All you need to say is 'I love you,' and that girl will be yours forever."

--

Final Author's Note: Yeah, the little bit about the bull was a crack I have for the game. Luckily there's no fault in the game for having the parents and offspring mate; otherwise, there'd be a serious in-breeding situation on my farm. Maybe that's why Daryll's convinced I'm cloning cows? XD