A/N: Hey Guys! Thank you so much for all the reviews, favorites, follows, everything. You guys are the best! So to get it out of the way, please Read and Review (an aspiring writer needs all the help she can get ;). As I promised this is when Raven finds the journal and next chapter will be a little special. Be warned there is a foreign language. Maybe if you guys want to know what it says you should review. Enjoy!
Disclaimer: I don't own Teen Titans or DC Comics! There would be so much more Raven and her emotion episodes. Actually everyone on the team would have one.
Raven
Raven quietly walked down the hall to Beast Boy's room. She saw and heard Beast Boy wanting something, but now this gave her a chance to snoop around for more information on Beast Boy. Raven stopped in her tracks. She was about to do the exact thing Beast Boy did to her multiple times to get to know her. She wondered if that made her or him the hypocrite. But unlike Beast Boy he wondered and try to get to know her, she didn't. Now when they needed to know Beast Boy they didn't.
Don't blame this on the did this. How can you call yourself a friend? Raven stepped back in surprise. Timid had never spoken with such a hard voice. Maybe it was because of Beast Boy. Ever since he went inside her mind her emotions were affected by him as well.
Or maybe it's you being affected. Knowledge said matter-of-factly. Raven begin to blush.
No! I can't think about those things right now. Beast Boy needs me, as a friend. Raven stated. But Raven couldn't deny them. She didn't know Beast Boy like he knew her, but that didn't mean that she felt something, strange for him. She really needed to meditate. But right now she wanted to get this journal that Beast Boy mentioned. Then Raven sensed her leader's presence.
"Robin." Raven turned to look at him. He stood about five feet away from her in his leader mode.
"Raven." One thing that Raven noticed about her and Robin's relationship was that they could say many things to each other without actually saying anything. She did have an attraction to Robin because of this but she soon realized that she didn't someone to read her mind. She needed someone to help her speak it, Jinx told her this when Jinx was having problems with her feelings for Kid Flash. At the time Raven was reluctant to accept the advice, but now Raven could see what Jinx meant. Now, Robin was asking her what just happened. More like commanding her to tell him.
"Look, she was dying to talk to him. Plus the only way to believe the truth is to experience it." Robin was bout to say something but Raven knew that she only had a little bit of time to, inquire about Beast Boy's past.
"You know that isn't what I meant." Raven did know what Robin meant, but she didn't know the answer to his question. Beast Boy was in control of the Beast as far as she knew, but now it seems like the Beast is taking over Beast Boy.
"I approached a sensitive subject with Beast Boy and his young mind reacted in anger. Luckily he could hold it back." Raven held her own opinion in. She knew that Robin needed facts not opinions to assess the situation.
"But do you think-"
"Garfield may not know the Doom Patrol but Beast Boy does. He wouldn't let anything happen to those he cares about. I should know." Raven stated. She believed in Beast Boy's compassion for his friends. It was his strongest emotion. It's who he is.
"You're right sorry. I was thinking as a leader, not a friend." Robin apologized. Raven knew that Robin was just stressed and when he was stressed he tended to become harsher. It was how he controlled things.
"I understand. With Mento and the other members of the Doom Patrol, you must feel overwhelmed." Robin nodded at Raven's observation. Having another alpha male in the tower always did make Robin a stressed. The situation didn't help either. Raven turned to go to Beast Boy's room.
"Where are you going?" Robin asked curiously.
"Beast Boy wanted something from his room I'm going to go get it it for him." It was best to stick to the truth with Robin. He could sniff out a lie like a bloodhound. "You should go and try to calm down the Doom Patrol and the rest of us." She only had so much time to investigate Beast Boy's room. Standing there with Robin was only taking that precious time. She prayed to Azar that he bought the bait.
"I guess you're right. You'll be ok?" Robin asked in concern. Raven held back a chuckle.
Happy calm down. Raven ordered. I can't. Robin has no idea that Beast Boy cleaned his room! Happy went into a fit of giggles. Yeah! He should be worried about himself. He's got the death job, not us. Now brave was joining in the laughter too. Raven bought herself mentally back to the present.
"I'll be fine."
"If you say so." Robin sighed in exhaustion before turning towards the main room. Raven turned back heading towards Beast Boy's room.
When Raven teleported through Beast Boy's room the memories of their last encounter ran through her mind. I can't believe that was this morning. It seems so far away now. But Raven did remember her discoveries this morning. His nightmares, birthday, and he hid something under his pillow. Don't try to deny him flirting with you. Passion purred. Passion was a new, strong, emotion. When I know the truth I'll consider things, but how can I know how he feels without knowing him. Plus in his mind he's only eleven. I would be taking advantage of him. Raven chastised in defense. Something tells me he wouldn't mind one bit. Passion said lustfully. Raven blushed. She really wasn't ready to face those possibilities. Just find the journal and then go and meditate. maybe I should meditate now. She didn't want to but her mind couldn't focus. She looked for a good spot to meditate in Beast Boy's room. Right in the middle of his room was enough space for her to levitate, but it was the view that convinced her to stay. It was the outlook of the city. It look so small but it was still the shiny Jump City she knew and loved. The setting sun cast a beautiful mix of colors that reflected off the skyscrapers of the city. The view was a beautiful but crazy mix of colors that almost seemed to reflect her mind. Raven started to levitate and closed her eyes to meditate.
About some time later Raven opened her eyes. She noticed how much calmer she was. Her emotions were being handled and for the first time since the accident she felt somewhat normal. Now to get the journal. Raven lowered herself to the ground. As she lowered herself her eyes caught something on the bed post. She went toward what appeared to look like markings. She definitely didn't see markings. What caught her eyes were scratch marks. Little tiny ones that were barely noticeable. Raven touched the bed post. It felt sanded, recently sanded. What are you hiding? Raven quietly whispered. She felt uneasy about her discovery. Now the journal was a necessity.
Raven remembered that Beast Boy hid something in his bed while she came in. She lifted the blankets and pillows off the bed, with her powers of course. Something fell out. At first glance it looked like a book. Raven's eyes widened. Beast Boy reads? But as she went closer to it was a forest green hardcover journal. At least she could tell it was green. That has obviously been through a lot. The cover was bent at the corners and had scratches on it. But what was most disturbing was the dark stains on it. This must be the journal Beast Boy was talking about. Raven inspected it more, contemplating the idea of opening it. She could learn everything now or she could wait. It would break his trust if she read it. But he would understand, he went inside her mind. She's just simply returning the favor. Plus I came here to snoop anyway.
Raven opened the journal. She expected illegible writing and horrible grammar. She definitely didn't expect a foreign language. The writing was legible, but it was hard and expressive.
Novemba 3, 2004
Mimi nilikuwa mafunzo kwa mento tena leo. Mimi bado hawezi kurejea katika wanyama kubwa. Mento aliniambia kuwa kama mimi hawezi kujifunza siwezi kulinda timu. Najua, ni tu machungu lakini mimi tu hawezi kusaidia kufikiri kuhusu nini kama zinageuka tu kama wazazi wangu. Mimi itabidi kuwa peke yake tena. Tafadhali, Mungu siwezi kupoteza yao. Labda mimi nina tu kufikiri kuhusu hili kwa bidii. Tu kupata bora mnyama Boy. Kulinda, tabasamu, na kuwa na furaha.
The only words she understood was the date, November 3, 2004, and boy. That word looked erased and written over and over again like the writer was trying to memorize it. Or learn it. Knowledge whispered in awe. Raven started shaking. Rage was growling in her mind. She had to calm herself. Her powers still reacted impulsively to her anger. Maybe it was because it was the beginning of the journal. She flipped to the middle.
May 12, 2006
Nilikwenda ndani ya akili Raven leo. Sauti weird Najua lakini ni kweli! Akizungumza ya weird mimi lazima kweli kuwa kuandika katika lugha ya Kiingereza. I really don't like English, writing and reeding it. Its not esy, that"s not even rite! One more word. Raven. Raven. Pink Raven, Green Raven, Grae Raven. Raven. I like her name in English. Raven is my fri- rafiki. Siwezi hata Spell rafiki kwa Kiingereza. Lakini nilikwenda ndani ya akili ya Raven. Ilikuwa creepy na weird mara ya kwanza lakini, katika mwisho nikawa karibu na Raven. Alitoa wito mimi, rafiki. Cyborg pia, lakini mimi nina furaha kwamba yeye aliniangalia mimi na alisema. Yeye hata blushed. Ilikuwa ni nzuri. na nikaona yake katika nyeupe yeye kweli hawakuwa kuangalia kama malaika. Raven Raven. I like it.
Raven was surprised. It was hard to be mad because now she knew why he kept calling her angel. But this proved that Beast Boy didn't really know English.
Bring!
Raven's communicator vibrated at her side.
"What?" Raven opened it and snapped at the caller. She felt bad when she realized that it was Starfire.
"I am sorry friend Raven but I did not mean to upset you." Starfire said apologetically. Raven rubbed the bridge of her nose.
"You didn't upset me Star." Raven noticed that Star was in the building. "Why did you call me in the building Star?" Raven asked.
"Oh, Elasti-Girl came back from her visiting of Beast Boy and Cyborg made dinner. I did not know where you were." Starfire explained. Raven looked out the window and sure enough it was night. The clock on Beast Boy's dresser said 7:45. How long have I been in here?
"I'll be there in a few." Raven said nonchalantly.
"See you soon friend!" Starfire spoke cheerfully. Raven turned her communicator off. She looked back at the notebook. She needed answers and she would get them. Her anger was back.
Raven entered the main room, hood on. Cyborg and Robot-man were in the kitchen cooking meat with sad smiles on their faces. Probably thinking about how Beast Boy would probably be berating them about killing innocent animals. Starfire and Elasti-Girl were comforting each other with stories. Elasti-Girl looked better, sad but not as devastated as she was this morning. Robin and Mento were straight ahead 'discussing' something. It was steadily increasing in volume, adding tension in the room. Raven advanced toward them, specifically Mento.
"If you were a true leader you would accept the fact that he is better with us." Mento said sternly. That stopped Raven in her tracks. Their discussion was about them taking Beast Boy. She was so scared about Beast Boy running from them that she forgot about the possibility of the Doom Patrol taking him away from them.
"If YOU were a true leader you could just tell us what we want to know!" Robin yelled back.
"Please don't yell, Beast Boy is sleeping." Elasti-Girl said calmly.
"No Rita! These kids are in over their heads and they want to take care of MY son." Mento exclaimed.
"We understand sir-" Starfire also tried to
"WE KNOW! That's why we called you. But we are his friends that he hasn't run from." Robin was now in Mento's face. Mento stepped back in shock at Robin's personal jab. But Mento regained composure quickly.
"Yet you still had to call us because you don't know anything about him." Mento sneered. This reminded Raven why she was here in the first place. Anger consumed her once again.
"Both of you need to be quiet." Black energy surrounded Robin and Mento's mouths. "Now Mento, tell us what we want to know." Raven let both of them go. Robin just shuddered and backed off but Mento became rigid. This ticked Raven off.
"I'm sorry, MISS but Beast Boy would be safer and more comfortable with us. We are more prepared for this type of situation." Mento barked.
"Miss." Raven growled. Raven dropped her hood.
"Mento." Robot Man warned.
"Sir, I think you should back down
"No. Beast Boy-"
"YOU CAN'T HAVE BEAST BOY!" Raven's demonic voice came forward and her four red demon eyes flashed at Mento. Mento finally sat down. He was a little paler than before. Raven calmed down. "You will answer our questions, then when Beast Boy is awake we can let him decide where he wants to go." Mento only nodded at Raven's suggestion. Raven sighed. She hated to let her rage out but with an alpha male like Mento she had no choice. "Ok then, tell me why most of this is in a different language." She showed the Doom Patrol the journal. She heard a gasp from Elasti-Girl. The rest of the members just stared at the journal like it was some ghost.
"He still uses that?" Raven would never think that she would hear Negative man's voice so haunted.
"That's not the point. Steve tell them." Rita's voice held the command that she carried in her movies and her fights. Mento sighed and bowed his head. He took off his mask. Raven knew whatever was coming out next was something she would wish she didn't hear.
"Let's eat first. Then I will tell you what we know." Raven stared at him confused.
"What do you mean? Aren't you guys family? In his file it says you guys raised BB for like 5 years." Cyborg said while he was preparing everything for dinner. Raven agreed,the reason they called them was because they thought the Doom Patrol would know more about Beast Boy.
"I hacked into his files and changed some things around. I didn't want his past to follow him. We don't know everything about Beast Boy's past. We only knew him for about two years. But it was enough to know that what happened to him, should never happen to any child." Mento's voice was soft and full of guilt. He sounded broken. What exactly happened to Beast Boy?
PS: Just kidding (about asking for the translations. Please do review still!)
Entry 1: I was training with Mento again today. I still can't turn into big animals. Mento told me that if I can't learn that, I can't protect the team. I know, it just hurts but I also can't help thinking about what if it turns out just like my parents. I'll be alone again. Please, God I can't lose them. Maybe I'm thinking about this too hard. Just get better Beast Boy. Protect, smile, and be happy.
Entry 2: I went inside Raven's mind today, sounds weird, I know but it's true! Speaking of weird I should really be writing in English….I can't even spell friend in English. But I went inside Raven's mind. It was creepy and weird at first but in the end I became closer to called me friend. Cyborg too, but I'm glad that she looked at me and said it. She even blushed. It was so beautiful. And I saw her in white, she really did look like an angel.
This was courtesy of a translator app on my phone. The language was Swahili. Thanks for reading and please review!