A/N: Someone pointed out to me that a few of the drabble meme prompts over at LJ were deleted, I guess taking the fills with them? Sad. =( So here's another one that I did... now I can't remember who posted the prompt originally, or even what the exact prompt was, but I think(hope) it was something to the effect of this:

"We're out of ice."

"We're out of ice? But where will all the polar bears live?"

Enjoy. =)

Puck's never seen Rachel drunk before. Actually, he's pretty sure she's never been drunk before, so when he realizes that Santana's been giving her drinks all night and she's actually been finishing them off, he's kind of intrigued to see how things play out.

It's a celebration, after all. The football team won another game, their third in a row—pretty much a miracle—and Mike's parents are out of town for the weekend, giving them the perfect place for a party.

The big backyard is full of people and drinks and laughter, and Puck's feeling pretty damn good with a tipsy Rachel leaning all over him.

Matt emerges from the crowd and smiles and nods at them as he passes, but he's apparently on a mission. Seeing Mike near the house, he calls out, "Hey, man! We're out of ice!"

It happens so fast, Puck almost misses it. All he knows is one second his girlfriend is wrapping her arms around him, apparently feeling good even though she can't walk straight because she's grinning and giggling at absolutely nothing, and the next she's on the ground, her hands on her head like she just heard that musical theatre's been outlawed(which, Puck thinks, maybe it should be).

She starts letting out this little wailing noise, and Puck starts to freak the fuck out as Matt stops midstep to stare and Santana and Brittany saunter up to watch. Shit, what's a seizure look like? And why is everyone just standing around when his girl obviously needs help? "Rach? Babe, what—"

"We're out of ice?" she repeats, frantic. God, is she sobbing? "But where will all the polar bears live?"

She's his girl and all, but right then Puck thinks she's had one shot too many of crazy juice.

Santana doesn't bother holding it in, she drops her head back and laughs loudly.

Puck thinks he would laugh, too, if he hadn't just imagined a thousand things happening to Rach that would land her in the hospital(none of them being complete stupidity thanks to alcohol, but the way she's been guzzling those fruity drinks, maybe he should've seen it coming). He turns to Matt and glares, and everything in his expression says, Look what you did, dude.

Matt grins and shrugs, as if to say, I'm not takin' the blame for this one. Your girl, your problem.

Meanwhile, Brittany drops to her knees at Rachel's side, looking heartbroken. "Poor Shamu."

"Uh, Britt?" Santana puts a hand on her friend's shoulder. "That's the whale."

"Oh." The blonde blinks in confusion. It's a very familiar expression for her. "Then who's the polar bear?"

Santana tilts her head to the side in thought, and Puck wonders if he's actually the sane one here. Why is she encouraging the crazy? "Nanook?" she guesses.

"It doesn't matter, he's going to die without a home!" Rachel cries, and reaches out to grab Puck's leg like she expects him to have the answer to global warming. He's legit never seen her doe eyes this big or sad before. "Maybe we could do a fundraiser? I could sing."

"Sure thing, babe. We'll get on that tomorrow," Puck assures her, reaching down to help her stand. He's pretty sure it's time to get this girl home to bed. And shit, she's so wasted that he'll probably have to put her to bed alone.

"I like to sing…"

"I know, Rach."

"I'm very good," she continued persuasively, nodding her head like a fucking bobble head doll. Then she starts belting out her own special rendition of "A Little Black Rain Cloud" from Winnie the Pooh(and fuck him that he knows that, he's spent way too much time with his sister), 'cause apparently even Rachel Berry isn't familiar with a song about polar bears.

The funny thing about that, though? Even drunk off her ass, Rachel makes it sound like something that could be on the radio. His girl is just that talented.

But if any of the glee members around them join in and turn this into a full-on musical number, he will beat someone down.

"You guys headed out, then?" Matt asks.

"Yeah. Thanks, asshole," Noah chuckles, leading Rachel toward the house.

Matt grins and calls after them, "No problem."

Behind them, Santana helps Brittany to her feet, but the blonde is still frowning. "San?"

"Yeah?"

"If all the polar bears die, who's going to sell Klondike bars?"

She's used to Brittany's questions, but Rachel plus this is too much and she's a little buzzed. So Santana just laughs.