Chapter Fourteen

KAI

"The knife the little mermaid held shook.

In the next moment, she threw the knife into the waves.

The waves lit up as the knife hit. The sun was rising above the ocean.

The little mermaid looked at the prince through fading eyes and threw herself into the ocean.

And, becoming sea foam, the little mermaid disappeared."

My eyes paused at the last word. Disappeared. How grievous and woe-be-gone that word sounded to me. It hurt me by the fact that those words were written by Rachel herself. Did she really think this was reality?

I had been flipping through the books she read when she was young, when I spotted this book "The Little Mermaid". It seemed as if it had been touched recently and when I picked it up and leafed through the pages, I descried her penmanship as she cancelled the words of the last few pages and replaced them with her very own handwriting.

Originally, this story had what one would call a happy ending. The little mermaid was supposedly reunited with her lover who was coincidentally the prince of the nearby country. She was supposed to be with him. But... But Rachel changed the finale of the story. She completely turned it around and made the little mermaid die...

I shook my head silently to myself. I didn't want this to be the resolution of the story. The prince was supposed to have her, to love and to hold, forever, till death did them part. But even such a potent hand like death would not be sufficient to do them part; they would love forever. They would not be compelled to separate under any circumstances, at all. I... I wouldn't allow it.

But what was I? What was I compared to fate? If destiny decreed that they would not have a "happily ever after", in what way, in what position was I in to defy the divine decree?

A question haunted me though. How could the prince allow himself to see the little mermaid die in front of his eyes? Aigoo... Babo yah, Kai? The little mermaid passed when he was asleep. His eyes were closed. He couldn't witness her passing; he was in no place to hinder her destruction...

"Oppa?" Rachel paused at the threshold of the study area, before striding in. Her hair was still wet from the shower, and as her hair was not completely dry, her hair appeared to be glittering and she looked so surreal. As if... If I reached out to touch her, she would become all foam and bubbles...

She planted a kiss on my lips swiftly before resting on the couch right next to me. I pulled her in and took in her sweet shampoo scent as well as the amazing smell her body soap had effected on her. She smelt even better than when we were just dating.

"Wae?" She took one look at what I was reading and frowned. The expression on her face completely changed. Taking the book from me, she shut it and pushed it back in its original position.

"Rachel..." I called out to her in worry. She pulled back a radiant smile and looked at me, but I could feel the anguish behind that smile. It was an artificial smile, on her face for the purpose of reassuring me.

"Why did you change the ending of the story?"

"Oppa, isn't that the original ending of the story?" She smiled.

"Neh, hajima..." I shook my head. How was I supposed to say this? "Wouldn't the alternative be more pleasant?"

"Life is supposed to be pleasant?" She asked, stressing on the word "supposed", but still smiling. Though I could see her lips were quivering.

"Of course." I smiled and nodded.

She looked down at the floor and an awkward silence overwhelmed us.

"Let's sleep," she lulled me from the couch and pulled me to the room.

She lay her head on my shoulder, sighing deeply while trying to falling asleep. My mind was swarmed with thoughts she could be mulling over. I had control of the situation, yes, I did.

Kai... I snorted silently to myself. You don't even have complete control over this terrible situation. You are the cause of Rachel's uncertainty for the future, of her unsettling heart. Your actions increases her ambivalence day by day...

Keurae, even if I didn't have the rule over this quandary, I had to ensure that in her heart, in her mind, she felt I did.

"Rachel?" I leaned out and called out, a little too loud, to the extent of vociferating. Instantly, I felt a pang of contrition at calling so loudly, and settled back into my seat.

"Neh, Oppa?" She acted out her gorgeous eye-smile in my direction.

"I won't allow the little mermaid to become sea foam and disappear. I promise you." I vowed out loud and resolved in my heart.

Her expression changed to one of melancholy and she shut her eyes, ignoring my statement. My heart sank. She knew that I was not in control of our predicament...

Arousing from sleep halfway, I tried to identify the source of my awakening. Rachel was crying her eyes out in her dream. "Ani, Oppa... Jebal... Kajima..."

I roused Rachel from her sleep. "Gwenchana, Jagiya... I'm here..."

"Oppa!" She frantically wrapped her arms around me, weeping bitterly as I felt my shoulder getting wet. Oh, what did it matter... My little mermaid was heartbroken now... Seeing her in her time of desperation and affliction made me feel as if a knife had been pierced through my heart and the thorns of roses pricked me as if they pined for my agony.

"I dreamt..." she choked, and I patted her back comfortingly. "Take your time..."

"I... I saw you..." She choked out those words through the tears. That lump in her throat must be inflicting pain upon her, such that she was unable to even produce those simple words with ease. I cursed that lump in her throat silently.

"You... You got married with Cheklin ssi... I saw that... Oppa, it's true, it's true..." she insisted while tears squeezed the breath out of her.

"Nothing of that is true, silly... Can't you see I'm right next to you?" I kissed her forehead gently.

"Ani, ani... Oppa, my dreams... They're always true..." she sniffed. "At least the nightmares are..."

"Oppa, you're not mine... You're Cheklin ssi's... You're not mine... You're Cheklin ssi's... Jinjjaeyo... Jinjjaeyo..." she persisted through all those words even though I knew each word was like placing her heart against the thorn, and the edges of her heart were slowly ebbing away...

I spent the rest of the night trying to alleviate her fears, trying my best to bring her back to her usual composure. As she fell asleep, there was a fat droplet of tear that rolled rebelliously down her cheek, betraying her emotions. I rubbed away the tear from her face with the tip of my finger, taking the opportunity to caress her beautiful face.

"Baby don't cry, tonight..." I randomly broke out in chorus.

"eodumi geodhigo namyeon

Baby don't cry, tonight

eobseotdeon il i dwell geoya

moolgeo poom i dueneun geoseun niga aniya,

ggeutnae molla ya hae deon

So baby don't cry, cry

nae sarangi neol jikilteni..."

I leaned down and kissed her forehead while another recalcitrant tear spilled out of her eye.

"moolgeo-poom-i dueneun geoseun niga aniya, ggeutnae molla ya hae deon..."