A/N: Merry Christmas, my friends! And a Happy New Year!

Chapter fourteen

When Damon entered the boarding house, at first, he got the impression that nobody was home. But a few minutes later he heard footsteps and saw Stefan rushing downstairs. His brother glanced at him and managed a smile.

"Damon, what a surprise," Stefan said, trying to sound casual.

Indeed, Damon's visits here were on the rare occasions, he mostly stayed at Rick's place. Everyone was confused. Elena tried to break through the wall he had built around him but Damon watched her struggle with no interest.

He couldn't understand her anymore. Her and Caroline. They were so self-absorbed and yet Bonnie loved them. Everything she did was for them and now Bonnie was gone but they didn't do anything. Just waiting for her to return. Caroline was angry at Damon. Sometimes her attitude made him want to squash her like a bug.

"You were with her and you must have done something terrible if she doesn't want to go home!"

Right... Lay the blame at somebody's door. Of course, it wasn't terrible at all to shun your friend when she needed you most.

As annoying as Caroline was, Damon could still understand her. Elena, though, was strangely calm for a person whose best friend went missing. Bonnie had called only once and both Elena and Stefan were sure that she would come back when she felt like it.

And meanwhile, Damon thought grimly, let her be alone. And lonely... Nothing she's not used to.

They didn't know anything about the witch-hunters, of course. He couldn't tell them about that without telling that he had left her. That he let her be kidnapped. But Bonnie's so-called friends should be more worried, since Bonnie had disappeared under weird circumstances.

Apparently, not only Bonnie but even her father fled the town. Sheila's house was sold. The last time Bonnie's dad visited his hometown he was assailed with questions by Caroline. Sadly, all he could say was that Bonnie had called him several times but didn't even give him her phone number. According to Caroline, Bonnie's father looked rather calm, almost as if he was compelled. Maybe, he was.

"I wanted to grab some things," Damon said and without waiting for his brother to respond went upstairs.

His room was almost empty now. Damon opened the wardrobe and began packing his stuff when Stefan appeared in the doorframe, with his arms folded.

"I thought that we could talk."

Damon didn't spare him a glance.

"Do the talk part. I'll pretend to listen."

Stefan frowned and paced toward his brother.

"Are you going to buy Alaric's apartment?"

"I don't have to buy anything," Damon said softly.

"So I guess you're not coming back yet?"

Damon zipped up his bag and straightened his back.

"It's still your home, you know."

"It's probably time to get my own place," Damon said.

"Look... I'm worried about you."

Damon's face was passionless when he turned to his brother.

"Don't be."

When he went downstairs he saw the sun streaming in through the windows. Everything here was so familiar. Sometimes old houses changed slowly. He looked at the fireplace, at the furniture and at the carpet on the floor. Suddenly his face broke into a smile.

"Why are we doing this?"

"Because I don't wanna stain the carpet."

"I knew you were gonna say something like that."

"Hm. Judging again..."

It was such a vivid memory, he felt like he went back in time. He was there again, he was with Bonnie, preparing to torture Mason Lockwood...

If you think about it, all the moments he and Bonnie shared were pure romance.

"What are you thinking about?" Stefan's voice sounded behind him.

"Nothing stupid," Damon replied immediately.

"Listen, Damon, it's time for you to stop acting like this," Stefan said, exasperatedly. "I'm your brother and Elena misses you, she misses you being her friend."

For Heaven's sake...

"I see," Damon said coldly. "She misses our small talks. Eating ice-cream, going to the cinema... And so many other things we never did."

"It's not her fault, it's nobody's fault," Stefan said mildly. "I know how you feel but maybe it's time to... to learn to live with the idea."

"What idea?"

"That Bonnie isn't coming back."

Damon's face darkened like a stormy sky.

"Leave Bonnie out of this, Jiminy. And do something to entertain your girlfriend because her dear friend is not in the mood to do it."

Stefan looked at him in disbelief.

"Suddenly Elena and I mean nothing to you? Are you serious?"

"The better question is are you even listening to yourself?"

Maybe, every single vampire was screwed up. Damon couldn't understand his brother. How far would he go for Elena?

"Damon..."

"Elena isn't pleased," Damon said coldly. "And you are worried. Now look at me, brother. Look at me and see how little I care."

It didn't bring him any satisfaction to talk to Stefan that way. He was mostly annoyed and strangely indifferent. Maybe, he was telling the truth now, without realizing it. Maybe, he stopped caring a long time ago. Returning to Mystic Falls was like jumping back into the swamp and sometimes Damon couldn't help but feel disgusted.

He used to be so stupid... He was probably still stupid. Not because he let some arrogant, judging witch slip through his fingers. Because he missed her, her of all people. And he felt like nothing and no one could fill the hole she left behind. How stupid was that?..

He got that ominous feeling when he woke up and for the whole day it had been haunting him. He couldn't shake it off no matter how hard he was trying to distract himself. He was worried when he watched TV, when he chewed his food, when he lied on his bed.

Damn Stanley. It was his fault Julian was stuck here when everyone else was busy. The witch who had been captured in Scotland was rescued by Will Gaule. Matthew was furious, of course. Bonnie Bennett escaped, and now so did Madelaine.

Julian was alone at his old place in Boston. Going back to his birthplace was weird. It all had started here. He used to live here with his parents, with his brother. His father was a devoted Christian. His mother was so quiet and kind. Julian loved his family but he wanted a little more freedom.

Then it happened. He started hearing the murmurs everywhere he went. Strange voices whispering him strange things. He quickly realized they were in his head and it scared him dreadfully. After that, everything went crazy for him. His mother was crying all the time and his father's prayers weren't heard... The doctors, the clinics... And the voices in his head became louder. His body was flooded with heat and one day holding it back became unbearable.

That was the day when he was home. He looked at his mother's smiling face and at his father who looked older than Julian remembered him. His brother didn't know how to act around him. Julian wanted to tell them that all the shots the doctors gave him couldn't change who he was. He didn't say anything, though.

He couldn't remember the first time he used the magic but he remembered the damage caused by it. He came to his senses when he stood outside of his house, watching it burn. The power inside him needed to be released and his mind was clear now.

A few days later Matthew found Julian to punish him. Julian was too horrified to protect himself.

"I didn't want to," he had said, when the Witchfinder General accused him of his sins.

"What you did to your family is a horrible thing. You deserve to suffer for this. Do you understand?"

Julian looked into his pale blue eyes. He was afraid to die but he was more afraid to live like this.

"I didn't want to," he said again. "I don't even remember what I did."

"Do you know who you are?"

Julian shook his head.

"Do you want to avenge your family?"

He was silent as if he had just been sentenced to death. Matthew spoke up again,

"Do you want to destroy the creature who made you do this?"

Julian blinked, wondering if he had heard wrong. It was the moment when his life suddenly had meaning.

If only it was less messy... Julian knew where his loyalty lied but sometimes it was difficult.

It's fucking ridiculous, Julian thought, pacing around the room. His house was rebuilt after the fire but it was depressing to be here. Finally, Julian decided to walk out.

The night was dark and Julian got a heavy heart. He stood on the threshold, looking at the empty street. The moths were swarming around the front porch light.

All those years, and he could still be scared...

"I wondered how I could get an invitation," a voice came from the shadows. "What can I say? Thank you for saving me the trouble."

It was like the darkness itself attacked him. He felt a gust of wind and immediately there was a death grip on his neck. And the voice that Julian never wanted to hear again sounded right by his ear,

"You knew I would come. Didn't you?"

Julian tried to break away but he didn't have the vampire strength. All he had was that terrible power, that magic that killed his family. He had no choice but to use his power to make the vampire scream in pain.

He cast a spell and nothing happened. Nothing at all. Damon's grip on him didn't weaken, Damon didn't cry out. Julian couldn't breathe anymore and suddenly a mad laugh bubbled past his lips.

Help me, he wanted to yell.

People were sleeping in their warm beds. Nobody saw him. Nobody saw him dying.

"Tell me where she is," Damon's voice sounded again.

Julian choked, blood was pumping furiously in his ears.

"D-dead."

"Tell me."

"Dead," Julian managed. "Dead, she's dead, she's dead and you will never..."

There was a terrible sound of his own neck snapping. His body fell heavily on the porch and the vampire stepped over it.

"Consider your quick death as a gift," Damon said, without looking back. "From Bonnie Bennett and her whole righteous judging clan."

He walked forward and soon enough his silhouette was swallowed by the darkness.

There was probably one and only hotel in Mystic Falls that Derrick could like. Of course, it was the most expensive one but Derrick never cared much about the money. So he rented the penthouse and was now enjoying the beautiful interior, a lovely view out of the window and the excellent service.

"Bonnie will come to town tomorrow," Will said to his friend when he entered the room and found Derrick completely relaxed amongst expensive things he didn't really need. "We were supposed to work, you know."

"Aren't we working?" Derrick said, making a little flame roll between his fingers like a coin. "We're doing research and watching over the whole town."

"Right... I still don't understand why Hopkins would want to come here."

"It's the Hellmouth here," Derrick muttered and Will scoffed.

"No kidding... Will you meet Bonnie in Richmond?"

"Sure."

"Ok. Meanwhile, I'll take a quick trip to New York."

A flicker of amusement crossed Derrick's face but William ignored it.

"I need to check something."

"Okay," Derrick said stoically. "Tell Lucy I said hi."

"I have no idea what you're talking about," Will shrugged and added, "You think Bonnie is going to be ok?"

"She's tough."

"She needs to be tough to come back home," Will said slowly. "Somehow, it doesn't make sense..."

"That's it," Bonnie said, tossing the papers. "No more studying."

"Finally," Damon smirked as he leaned down to kiss her. She put her arms around his neck and he could swear he had heard her purr.

"Why do you even need to study?" he asked when he pulled her into his lap. Bonnie brushed his hair playfully with her hand.

"Going to college, remember?"

"You don't need your college. I'm your best teacher."

"Arrogant, self-absorbed, selfish," Bonnie whispered. "That's the vampire I know and love."

Damon smiled and placed a kiss upon her shoulder.

"Do I have to beg you to spend the night?.." he asked softly.

"That won't be necessary," she smiled teasingly. "Just try to be good."

"Hm... So, Italian tonight?"

"Cool. I love pizza."

Damon let out a sound of indignation.

"You didn't just say that."

"What?" she chuckled. "My common taste offends you?"

He smiled back at her and kissed her tenderly. Being together was so right. He would never let her go again.

"Let me ask you something," he murmured.

"Go ahead."

"Why did you come back?"

"I missed you."

"No doubt here but why now?"

Bonnie shifted uncomfortably.

"Damon..."

"Tell me."

Her face was sad now and he pressed his lips against her palm.

"Everything was so horrible..." Bonnie said. "I didn't know what to do. I thought I was gonna die."

He held her tight and she smiled at him.

"I'm a witch and I'm mortal. I can die every moment. I can die tomorrow. I can die today... I've just never thought that you..."

"I'm what?" he whispered.

"You can be hurt, too. And I don't want you to be hurt. I want to be with you..."

He looked at her face longingly. Then he raised his head and realized that the room started to dissolve. The walls had disappeared and soon he couldn't see anything but Bonnie.

"Be safe..." he whispered. "Till I find you."

"Kiss me," she said softly.

His lips touched hers and Damon closed his eyes. In a second it would be over, he knew it and his heart ached.

"Take care of Elena," Bonnie murmured and Damon flinched, waking up.

Right... He remembered the last kiss they shared. And Bonnie was judging even in his dreams.

Damon straightened up in his chair. He didn't even remember falling asleep. Once again, he was at Rick's place, surrounded by darkness. He thought that killing Julian would help him to feel better. But he didn't feel better at all. He was a happy man only when he was sleeping and it was frustrating.

He rubbed his eyes and heard someone knocking at the door.

"Come in," Damon said, without moving.

The door opened and a man with a case bag came in. That man's name was Brian Lynch and he worked as a private investigator. Damon looked at him darkly.

"I'm in the mood to hear the good news."

Brian scowled at once.

"I'm doing everything I can — "

"Let's skip the excuses and get to the point."

Brian looked uneasy as he sat down and irritated Damon let out a sigh.

"You don't really look enthusiastic. Maybe, I need to get you motivated? What if I tell you to kill yourself if you don't find her?"

"It's not that easy," Brian said, his eyes fixed on the floor.

A minute passed in a dangerous silence, then Damon shrugged, looking disappointed.

"Just tell me the news."

Brian spoke up quickly,

"Bonnie didn't contact her mother, her cousin Lucy or other relatives..."

Or her friends, Damon thought, still bitter after the last happy dream.

"But she visited her father," Brian continued. "In Paris."

Damon shot up straight in his chair.

"Bonnie was in France?" he asked hurriedly.

"She was. I talked to her father — "

"You went to France?" Damon interrupted him skeptically.

Brian allowed himself to look unpleased.

"You've been very specific about how much you wanted to find her."

Damon smiled.

"Please, go on."

"So, I talked to her father. Mind you, he doesn't know much, but luckily, I got a chance to check his hotel room. I've found this."

He handed Damon a big brown envelope. Damon opened it and took out a picture of Bonnie in a knitted hat and a dark-red coat. She was smiling. The misty grey Paris sky was behind her back.

Looking at her photo was as weird as waking up after the dreams about her, but Damon's face showed no emotion. He looked at another picture, with Bonnie and a man who had his arm around her shoulder. Damon remembered him.

"The lightning boy," he said slowly.

That was the man, the warlock who saved Damon from Julian. He wanted to find Bonnie and apparently he had found her.

"Her father didn't know where she was," Brian said cautiously. "But I think she's in Europe."

"So find her," Damon said absently.

Brian stood up.

"Should I take the pic — "

"Leave them."

Brian walked out and Damon glared at the pictures. Great, just great. He felt guilty and desperate and angry. Now he was also jealous. Way to go, Bonnie. Everyone is worried sick about you and you're having fun in Paris with some good-looking man.

"Knock-knock."

Damon's head whipped up. The door was still open and there was a man standing there.

"Visiting hours are over," Damon said coldly.

"Make an exception."

Damon's eyes narrowed.

"What are you doing here?"

"I just... wanted to see you."

Klaus came inside and took a quick look around.

"Nostalgic."

"Did you come to Mystic Falls to reminisce?"

"No," Klaus sat down and saw the pictures on the table. "Oh..."

It was too late to hide the photos. Damon looked away, his eyebrows knitted together in a frown.

"I've heard the rumors," Klaus said mildly. "But I didn't believe..."

He watched Damon closely but still got no reaction from him.

"So, it's true," Klaus chuckled. "What about... Are you really trying to... evolve?"

Again, the silence was his answer. Klaus leaned back in his chair, looking amused.

"You're a very young vampire. What are you trying to do, kill yourself?"

"Wouldn't it upset you," Damon said briskly.

"I'm just curious..."

"Curiosity killed the cat."

Klaus' mouth thinned.

"What happened to Elena?"

"She's no concern of mine."

"Right... Wanna hear something funny?"

"No."

"We had our little heart-to-heart," Klaus spoke up. "Elena and I. I was about to kill her but that's not really the point. I was wondering, so I asked her who she was going to choose — you or Stefan. And you know what, she couldn't decide. So maybe it's too soon for you to lose your hope."

Damon laid his hand on the arm of the chair.

"I know what you're trying to do. It's not going to work."

"You think so? And since when you've decided that you deserve something better than a girl who can't realize if she loves you or not?"

Damon's patience was wearing thin but he didn't want to show Klaus how he felt. So he smirked and said acidly,

"Should I even listen to the ancient vampire who couldn't hit on the blondest cheerleader ever? Have I mentioned that Caroline and I were involved?"

"She was compelled," Klaus said coolly.

Damon smiled again.

"So you've been digging into her past. Stalker much?"

"The cheerleaders do it to us."

Klaus picked one picture and Damon gritted his teeth.

"I'm not a fan of the witches in general, you know. They are dangerous when they gather together or when they realize their true strength. But Bonnie can be very useful. In many ways... You know, I feel a little disappointed with myself. She was right under my nose all this time and I didn't bother to see her."

He sighed and let the picture fall back on the table. Damon looked at him, his eyes cold as ice.

"I dislike Matthew Hopkins," Klaus said. "Our paths never crossed but I still hate him. He's a maniac."

"Unlike you..."

"And you killed his man."

"I've killed two."

"Yes, but the first one wasn't a warlock, he wasn't his fighter. Julian was. Hopkins will be furious."

"Good."

Klaus eyed him with pity and stood up.

"He will kill you, Damon. Time goes by, people are changing and you're still stupid and reckless."

"You know so much," Damon said, looking at him suspiciously. "Do you know where Bonnie is?"

"Do you know what my favorite city is?" Klaus smiled. "Bye, Damon. Always a pleasure. And send Caroline my... affection."

Damon watched him leave.

Now, Klaus was making fun of him. That was really humiliating. He didn't want to be vulnerable. He must be strong. Klaus could say whatever he wanted but Damon would shed blood, drink vervain, use Caroline's crazy Daddy's tricks.

He was used to fight Stefan to get Katherine or Elena.

But to get Bonnie he had to fight Bonnie.

God, she was worn-out. Her flight was uneventful and still she felt exhausted. Yesterday Margaret made her practice concentration. It was... tiring.

"Look deeper."

"I'm trying..."

"Now jump."

"I want to jump. I don't see the cliff."

"It's right under your feet. Just take a step forward."

Bonnie exhaled and opened her eyes. She was on a lovely lawn and Margaret was two steps away from her, reading a book.

"I can't get rid of the idea that it's just imagination and no real harm can be possibly done."

"Well, it's not my job to do you any harm!" Margaret exclaimed, holding a book to her chest.

"That's not what I mean," Bonnie said. "Look, the power of visualization is great but I'm not quite good with it."

"That's the problem with you, elemental witches," Margaret drawled. "Listen, seeking power within yourself is a serious matter."

"I know," Bonnie said. "I think I can do it. Eventually."

At the end of the day they both got bored, so they went to the karaoke club.

Bonnie smiled at the memory and brushed her hair behind her ear. She was going home now and nothing else mattered. She was a strong witch. She would become stronger. Eventually.

TBC