Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight and its characters. No copyright infringement is intended.

All original characters, plots, and the storyline contained within this derivative work are the property of Lazykate. This story may not be reproduced or reposted without permission from the author. This story is rated M for Mature and is not intended for anyone under the age of eighteen.

Chapter Fourteen

EPOV

I didn't want to think of Monday as the true beginning of my and Bella's relationship. We'd had incredible chemistry and bonded so quickly before that, to completely dismiss everything before Monday was completely impossible. In truth, part of me wished we had that time back: when it was just the two of us, sparks flying, endless potential, no messy complications.

At the same time, though, Bella and I had honesty between us now, and I was glad for that, even while it was tearing me apart at the same time.

Tuesday had been remarkably less painful than Monday, at least at first. I'd learned a long time ago to block out any kind of personal problems while I was at work, I had patients who trusted me to be there one hundred percent and make them my absolute priority. I didn't let myself think about Bella, or about anything she'd told me, as I moved steadily from patient to patient. I dodged a lunch invite from my obviously-curious dad, opting instead to drive to a nearby park after grabbing a burger from a local fast-food place.

I sat in my car and let myself think then, as I slowly downed my lunch.

Bella. Oh Bella. My Bella. Already I wanted to see her again, wanted to kiss her again, wanted to see the smile and warm sparkle in her eyes. I could call her, but I didn't know if she was at work or not...I had no idea what her schedule was like. Was she having sex with some other guy, right at that moment, while I was sitting there thinking about her? Was some disgusting sleazeball running his hands over the body and face I already thought of as mine?

Did I even want to know?

That's not Bella, I reminded myself for the hundredth time since seeing her picture on OPB's website the day before. That's not my Bella.

Part of me did want to know exactly what she was doing at work, if that's where she was, and in excruciating detail...but it was for the wrong reasons. I wanted to know so that I could see what the absolute worst could be, so that I didn't have to leave it up to my imagination. Because if left up to its own devices, my imagination could conjure up some pretty sick shit.

I thought again about how she'd explained the differences between the part of the company she worked for, and the one in LA. She'd answered my questions honestly, telling me what she'd done and what she didn't do. And I felt better for knowing all of it, instead of thinking that my girlfriend was potentially filming some kind of crazy gangbang with a dick in...

Suddenly nauseated, I wrapped up the remains of my burger and shoved it into the bag, then booked it back to the office. I didn't want to think about that shit anymore.

I wasn't sure if it was the burger or nerves that sat so heavy in my stomach for the rest of the afternoon, but something else was beginning to itch at the periphery of my mind, even as I forced myself to concentrate on my patients. Something that was really starting to piss me off, the more it itched, and by the time I peeled out of the parking lot at the end of the day I was heading straight over to Alice and Jasper's apartment.

Alice opened the door to my knock, confusion immediately clouding her features. "Uh, hi Edward, come in."

"Is Jasper here?"

"In the living room."

I was being rude and I knew it, but I'd built up one hell of a head of steam on the way over, and I needed to let it out, or I really was going to blow. I stomped into the tiny living room where Jasper sat, surrounded by what looked like term papers. "Why the fuck didn't you tell me?"

Jasper lifted an eyebrow at me before sighing and throwing down the pen in his hand and turning to Alice. "Hon, could you leave us alone for a bit?"

I wasn't sure if Alice left or not, because I was already ranting, letting loose the fury and betrayal I hadn't wanted to dump on Bella. "You're supposed to be one of my best friends, you fucking asshole, and you didn't tell me? What the fuck, Jasper?"

Jasper remained unruffled, and for some reason that just pissed me off more. "Edward, it wasn't my place to tell you."

"Bull-fucking-shit. Some chick is more important than me? Some random chick I just met that night? You fucking sat there and listened to Emmett yap about Rosalie being a porn star, knowing all along I was being set up with one and you didn't think I had a right to know?"

A tiny flicker of anger crossed his face then. "Is that what Bella is to you now, then? Just some chick?"

"Fuck no! But I didn't even fucking know her at the time! And I would like to have known about it before I started having fucking feelings for her!"

"Why does her job change that?" he asked quietly.

"Because it's fucked up, man! I'm falling head-over-heels for her, and that's scary enough without having to remember that she screws other people for a living. You don't have a clue where I'm coming from, do you?"

"Not in the way you're asking, no," he said slowly, considering his words. "But I've known Bella longer than you have. She's best friends with the woman I intend to marry someday. She has reasons for what she does, and if you're going to get hung up on the porn thing and let that ruin any relationship you might have with her, then I'll tell you straight-out that you're making a huge mistake."

"I didn't say...I don't want to let it ruin our relationship," I sputtered. "But don't fucking blow me off like it's no big deal!"

Jasper sighed and then jerked his head towards the couch. "Sit down and cool off, will you?"

"Don't fucking tell me to cool off, just answer my fucking question!" I started pacing back and forth, feeling better as I poured my anger into frenetic movement. "I would have thought that you, of all people, would have maybe trusted me a little more than that. I wouldn't have even necessarily said anything to her, but a little heads-up going in would have been nice."

"And again, would it have changed anything? Except that you would have been expecting her to show up looking like some cheap hooker when that's not what she is. She would have been at a disadvantage from the get-go, having to prove to you that she's not a whore. And you would have been surprised, but you'd still have been waiting for the other shoe to drop. The part where you were reminded that she was a porn star."

I froze in my pacing to give him a withering look. "So that's why you didn't tell me? You seriously were thinking more about her and how all this shit might ultimately affect her instead of how it is affecting me?"

"No, that's not why, even though everything I just told you is true and you know it. I didn't tell you because..." Jasper tilted his head back and took a deep breath. "Bella is the sum of many different parts, and her job is absolutely the least of them. Almost to the point to where it's a non-issue."

"Except maybe to her potential boyfriend?" I queried bitterly.

"I can't deny that," he admitted. "And if I'd honestly known you guys were going to hit it off the way you have, I...I still can't say that I would have told you, but I would have told Alice to get Bella to be more honest, sooner. Something that big...man, it's not my story to tell. Especially since she's no porn star. She's not like those other skanks, even though I can tell it's still somewhere in the back of your mind that she might be. You're afraid of what you might find out about her, or about what she does."

I clenched my jaw as I finally stopped my pacing. "She's been honest with me...I asked her exactly what she does, and what she's done, and she answered all my questions."

"Then what are you afraid of, Edward? Seriously, I know you're pissed at me, I get that. But what the hell are you still mad at Bella about? That she didn't tell you sooner?"

"I never said I was mad at Bella," I said quickly.

He shrugged. "There's something eating away at you, though, I can tell. Just spit it out."

I slouched over to the couch and slowly sagged down on it, turning his words over in my mind. "Jazz...rationally, I get it. I know she wouldn't be doing porn if she had any other choice. I know about her dad. I understand it. I'm not mad at her...I'm mad at the situation, that in this country right now, a woman feels the need to whore herself out so her dad doesn't end up dying from a bedsore infection in some shitty-ass nursing home. I'm mad that she could do so much with her life, if she wasn't chained to this one."

"And?" he prompted.

I rubbed my fingertips in hard circles against my temples, fighting the headache that was building there. "Okay yeah, I'm pissed off that I have to deal with these images in my head. How many other guys have to deal with the fact that their girlfriends are fucking other people on a regular basis? That by the time I see her at night, she's already given some other dude a blowjob? That when we do end up having sex, I'll have it running through my mind that it's nothing special for her, since she's been there and done it all? How do I fucking make that okay in my head?"

Jasper sat back in his chair, temporarily silenced by my outburst.

"I never saw this coming. I wasn't expecting to fucking fall for her like this...God, I just got out of a relationship, moved across the country, started a new job, and then she comes out of nowhere and it's like...like being hit by a freight train. I've never felt this way about anyone before, let alone this fast. And everything could have just been perfect if it wasn't for that one fucking thing!"

"It's never going to be perfect, Edward," Jasper replied finally. "You know about Alice's debt, how do you think I felt, sitting there in the rental office and them telling us there's no way in hell they can rent to us if her name is on the lease, because she owes more money in credit card debt than I make in a year? I looked at her, and it was like looking at a stranger, like I was seeing her in this whole new light. Now I know debt isn't the same as the porn..." he cut me off, seeing that my mouth was already opening to protest. "And our life isn't perfect. It still isn't. But we love each other, and bottom-line, that's enough. That makes it all worth it."

My headache was starting to pound harder. "She is worth it. I've already decided that. She's stronger than I can even imagine being, and if she can deal with it, then I should be able to as well. I should be able to support her and tell her that it doesn't matter...but it does! And she'd know it was a lie if I told her otherwise. It matters because I'm a selfish prick that doesn't want anyone else touching his girlfriend, even if it is just her job."

Jasper didn't respond right away, getting up instead and retrieving two bottles of beer from the refrigerator. I popped the cap off mine and took a long chug of it before speaking. "How long have you known Bella?"

"Ever since she started working for OPB. She and Alice hit it off right away."

I felt like the world's biggest asshole for continuing to harp on the topic, but at the same time, I'd hate myself more if I just gave up on it. "There's nothing else she can do, money-wise, for her dad?"

His eyes softened. "Believe me when I tell you that she's considered a million different things, but nothing that has a guaranteed income of that size. If something came along, she'd be out of there in no time flat. But she and Rosalie are OPB's biggest stars right now, did you know that?"

"Not really."

"Oh yeah, James loves those two. He's going to have a stroke when Rosalie leaves."

I grunted out a non-verbal reply and took another long pull off my beer.

"Edward...I know you're not asking for advice here, but I'm going to give it anyway. You need to be honest with Bella about all this. If you don't, it'll end up building up inside of you until you blow up again. She needs to know exactly how you're feeling."

"Whoa," I chuckled, a wave of déjà-vu hitting me.

"What?"

"I gave Emmett almost that same advice before I knew about Bella. It's a hell of a lot easier giving that advice than taking it, I can say that now."

"It's true, though."

"Yeah, it is."

We sat in silence for a little while longer before I remembered Alice. "Hey, man, I'm really sorry I barged in here like that. I'm still kinda pissed that you didn't tell me, but it's not really you I'm mad at. I'm mad at the whole situation right now."

"I know. It fucking sucks, Edward, I'm not going to try and convince you it doesn't. But you and Bella are going to have to come to some kind of...balance for dealing with it. Don't let that one thing, as big as it is, be what drives the two of you apart."

"Yeah...I guess I didn't have my head wrapped around it as well as I thought I did."

"And just as a heads-up..." Jasper lowered his voice to just above a whisper. "Alice probably heard everything you said, which means Bella will probably hear about it too. You might want to mention your little visit here tonight so she doesn't think you're keeping anything from her."

"Will do," I muttered, tipping my beer back again, wishing everything didn't have to be so fucking complicated.

xoxoxoxo

I left not long after that, letting Jasper get back to his stacks of term papers, headed straight home, and called Bella. She was obviously excited to hear from me, and despite my earlier resolve, I didn't bring up any of the shit that had been going through my mind all day, or my ranting at Jasper earlier. It was so nice to be able to have a normal phone call with the girl I was already thinking of as my girlfriend, I didn't want to ruin it.

Without even intending to, I told her about Tanya, and her reaction was surprisingly unconcerned. Bella was obviously confident enough in herself not to worry about ex-girlfriends who lived across the country. It was just another thing I liked so much about her...that sense of practicality and her ability to weigh what was really important in a situation.

Talking to her also helped me to forget about the porn thing. I asked her how her day had been, but I didn't dig for any details, and she didn't offer any. At the moment, I was happier in not knowing what her work schedule was.

I asked her out for dinner for Friday night, she said yes immediately, and we settled on seven o'clock. It wasn't until I yawned so hard that my jaw cracked that she teasingly sent me off to bed, instructing me to have sweet dreams about her.

Before I went to bed, though, I took a long shower and jerked off for the first time since before the 5k over the weekend. Her voice just had that affect on me...I could probably listen to her read the back of a cereal box, and I'd still get hard. Remembering her warm little body wiggling against mine Sunday morning...it made me come harder than I'd imagined a shower wank could.

Laying in bed later, I let myself think about the possibility of sex with Bella again, something that had been too close to the porn thing for me to recently imagine with any amount of enjoyment. Now that I was starting to get slightly numb to the idea of her job, though, I didn't mind picturing her back here, between my sheets. In fact, I was hoping that it might become a reality sooner rather than later. She'd been ready to go Sunday morning, until her conscience stopped her.

Wednesday was a better day at work, and to my pleasure, Bella called just as I got back home.

"Hey, are you busy?"

"Nope, you have perfect timing." I dropped my keys and wallet on the table by the door and reached up to loosen my tie. "Just walked in the door, actually."

"How was your day?"

"Kinda crazy since Dr. Gerandy took the day off, but it makes time go by faster. How was yours?"

"It was fine." She sounded tired, but she didn't elaborate on the statement. "Hey listen, I just wanted to give you a heads-up about something. Well, a couple of somethings."

"What's that?" I tucked my phone against my shoulder as I opened the refrigerator and perused the mostly-bare interior. I really needed to get my ass to a grocery store.

"Well, first off, I hear you went over and visited Jasper last night?"

Holy shit, Jasper wasn't kidding about those girls being tight with each other. "Uh, yeah, we had a little talk. It was just some stuff he and I needed to get sorted out between the two of us."

"So I heard." She didn't sound angry, though. "Everything good now?"

"Yep. He, uh...well, he kinda helped me get some clarity about how I wasn't really pissed at him, and definitely not at you, just at the whole situation. Hell, Alice probably gave you the play-by-play anyway, didn't she?"

"Not quite," she laughed softly. "But the, uh, situation was the other thing I wanted to give you a heads-up about."

Oh fuck. "Um, okay?"

"It's still aways off, but I wanted to tell you that I'll be out of town the first week of October. There's, um…a convention in Vegas that Rosalie and I will have to go to. I'll only be gone for a few days, but I wanted you to hear about it sooner rather than later, and from me."

"A...wait, a convention for porn?" I abandoned the refrigerator and went into the living room, dropping down into an armchair, my appetite suddenly gone. "They have those?"

"It's really not a big deal, at all," she said hastily. "We're literally there to just, uh, promote this year's films and the new stuff coming out. We sign a lot of autographs and get our pictures taken. We don't do...you know..."

"Okay, I..." I exhaled hard and started again. "God, Bella, I really hate feeling like we're dancing around the whole topic now."

"I know," she replied softly. "I don't like talking about it with you, but...I want to be honest with you from now on...if that's still what you want?"

I could hear the sudden uncertainty in her voice, and I knew exactly what she was getting at. "If you're asking if you're still what I want, then the answer is yes. And yes, I want you to be honest with me. I'm just still getting used to the idea and I'll probably say some more stupid shit, and no I don't really want to hear any gory details, but I want you to feel like you can talk to me if you need to, okay?"

"Okay. And ditto on everything you said. It goes for me too."

"Well then hit me up, baby. So you'll be gone at this convention signing autographs and stuff at the beginning of October?"

"Yes, that's really all there is to it." The relief in her voice was obvious. "If it weren't for the shoes we have to stand in all day, it would be the easiest thing ever."

"Thank you for letting me know. So is it a week, or what?"

"Not even...James and Alice will be there the entire week before, getting everything set up, but the rest of us just fly out for the show itself. I'll be gone for a long weekend."

"Ehh, I guess that means manly bonding time with Emmett and Jasper, then. Pizza and beer and baseball while our women are busy."

"You guys really haven't changed that much from college, have you?" I could hear the smile in her voice now, and damned if my dick wasn't already jumping the gun and getting hard.

"Not really. It's kind of scary how little we've really changed." I relaxed back further into the chair with a sigh, deliberately steering my mind away from my hard-on as I listened to her chatter away.

xoxoxoxo

Friday evening I got to Bella's place about five minutes early. I'd stopped to buy her a bouquet of flowers on the way, and that little errand hadn't taken as long as I'd thought. I found a parking spot and was just about to buzz her apartment when the door to the building opened and Rosalie stepped out.

She was obviously heading out for a date with Emmett; she looked fabulous, and she smiled when she saw me. "Edward, hi!"

I immediately forced any and all thoughts of the naked picture I'd seen of her out of my mind. "Hey Rosalie, how are you doing?"

"Never better! Going out with that big lunk of a friend of yours." The glow in her face took the sting out of her words, though, and I grinned back at her.

"He's been called worse things. Is it okay if I just go on upstairs and knock?"

Rosalie hesitated, and then twisted her arm to look at the delicate watch on her wrist. "Umm...yeah, you should be good. Actually...Emmett can wait a few more minutes, I'll let you in myself. Bella's running a little late today, and she's probably right in the middle of getting dressed or putting her makeup on."

"Oh, I can go wait in the car for a bit," I said quickly. Although the idea of catching Bella half-dressed was appealing, I knew Rosalie wouldn't let me get that lucky.

"No, it's okay...just promise you'll stay in the living room. No peeking in her bedroom." She gave me a playful poke in the chest as she turned and strode back into the apartment building, me right behind her.

As we climbed the single flight of stairs, her cell phone rang. "Oh crap...hello? Yes, I'm on my way right now...ugh, beauty takes time, don't you know that?" She fumbled for her keys and I could plainly hear Emmett whining on the other end of the line. "Yes, I remembered to bring them...yes I'm sure. Yes!" She finally shoved the key for the apartment door into the lock and twisted, then nudged it open with her shoulder.

"Should I just...?"

Rosalie nodded and motioned for me to go ahead into the apartment. Stay in the living room! she mouthed, before speaking out loud to Emmett again. "No, you can't take pictures. God, how many times do I have to tell you this..." The door clicked softly shut behind her, and I was alone in their apartment.

I stood awkwardly, not sure if I should move or call out for Bella or what...I definitely didn't want to scare the hell out of her if she came out of her room and wasn't expecting to find anyone there. Shit, I should probably just sneak back out and knock on the door so I didn't have to…

Except that just then a door down the hallway was yanked open and a naked Bella rushed out.

A very naked Bella.

I saw her mouth drop open in a startled little o, but she didn't scream, or jump back into the bathroom, or really even make an attempt to cover herself. She looked shocked, for sure, but she didn't seem afraid, or horrified.

And maybe that was what unglued my legs, because before I knew it I was in motion, dropping the flowers somewhere along the way, drawn to her without a question in my mind that this was supposed to happen. And she knew it too; her hands rose up to tangle in my hair as my arms went around her waist and I pulled her against me, hard. Sweet soft tongue, hot eager lips, the lingering dampness and warmth of her skin…and she was all mine.

.

BPOV

I wasn't sure whether I was going to kill Rosalie the next time I saw her, or kiss her. But at the moment, it didn't matter, because Edward had his arms around my naked body and he was kissing me like his life depended on it.

I moaned into his mouth and tugged slightly on his hair as he pressed harder into me, flattening my back up against the wall, pushing us close enough together that I could feel his rapidly-hardening erection beneath his pants. I ground against it unashamedly and he broke away from my mouth for a moment to moan, letting his head drop slightly.

"Bella...oh God...Rose let me in...she said you...ohhh..."

"I figured as much," I muttered, before nipping at his jaw. "That had to be a surprise, catching me in my birthday suit."

"You have no idea," he breathed against my neck. "God, you're so fucking beautiful…"

"Flattery will get you everywhere." I gasped as his hips pressed me further into the wall. "I've got a bedroom, we don't have to stay here in the hall."

He ran his lips down the length of my neck and nipped at my collarbone, just before bending quickly at the waist and then sweeping my completely stark-naked self up in his arms. I shrieked and grabbed at the towel as it slipped off my head. "What are you doing?"

"You said bedroom, I'm providing the fastest means of transport to get you to it. Which door?"

"The open one!" I squirmed a little, but his grip on my body only tightened as he strode down the hall to my room. And if I was going to be completely honest with myself, I didn't really want him to put me down.

I quickly revised my opinion when he crossed the room in three strides and tossed me playfully onto the bed, and then was over me a split second later. "You didn't see that coming, did you?"

"You weren't counting on me being stark naked and waiting for you, were you?" I countered, plunging my fingers through his hair as he started kissing my breastbone again.

"No," he muttered against my skin, "That was an unexpected and wonderful surprise."

I ran my hands down his back, gasping in delight when his wandering lips ran smoothly up over my breast and brushed over a hardening nipple. "Is this okay?"

"Fuck yes!"

Emboldened by my response, he licked it slowly several times before finally sucking it between his lips and tugged on it slightly with his teeth. The sheer erotic jolt that rocked my body and went straight between my legs made me moan out loud; I hadn't felt like this in a very long time.

"You're so beautiful, Bella, Jesus Christ." I could hear him mumbling as he finished teasing my breast and moved to repeat the sweet torture on the other one, but most of my concentration was on the rock-hard cock I could feel throbbing through his jeans, against my leg.

"Edward...please...take some clothes off."

He continued the licking and sucking for a few more seconds, before finally releasing me and looking up. Lust had darkened his green eyes until they were more dark jade than emerald. "Are we really going to do this?"

I blinked, hoping like hell that he was either just going the extra mile as a gentleman, or was kidding. "Um, yes? I mean, I hope so."

He grinned wickedly. "Me too. But I don't have...I didn't bring any protection with me. I should probably run out and get something before you start pulling my clothes off."

"Oh!" I blurted out, never more thankful for a last-minute impulse that had me throwing a box of condoms into my basket at the grocery the day before. "I, uh, I've got that covered. Literally."

His eyebrows went up. "My resourceful girl...were you hoping for this to happen?"

"You know I was," I growled, already tugging at his button-down shirt. He watched me struggle for a moment before grinning even wider, sitting back on his heels, and tugging it over his head in one easy move. Watching the smooth movement of the lean muscles in his chest and abdomen made me throb even harder, and I wondered briefly if I was leaving an embarrassing damp spot on the leg of his jeans.

"Pants too!" I demanded when he moved to stretch back out over me.

"Oh God," he moaned softly. "Bella, baby, I'm not going to last very long. I've wanted you like this from the moment we first met."

"Umm," was my brilliant reply as I took matters into my own hands and expertly popped the button and unzipped his jeans. I hooked my fingers under his boxers and shoved them, along with his jeans, down his thighs. He lifted up and, with some wriggling and kicking, managed to get them off along with his shoes.

He was crawling back up over my body again when a wicked idea seized me. I'd felt the heavy thick weight of his cock against me more than once, but I hadn't seen it yet, and I really really wanted to. "Edward? You still have your socks on."

The look on his face, when he lifted his lips from where they'd been sliding back toward my breasts, was priceless. "What?"

I batted my eyelashes at him. "As ridiculously fucking sexy as you are, the socks aren't doing it for me. Take 'em off."

He shook his head incredulously. "Socks. Okay, fine."

He sat back on his heels again, and positioned as he was between my spread legs, I now had the absolute honor and privilege of being able to eyefuck his glorious body from the top of his head down to where his cock thrust out from between his thighs.

I'd seen a lot of cocks over the past two years. I'd seen big ones, small ones, thick ones, ones that had a definite crazy bend to them, uncircumcised, cut, showers and growers. Some were better looking than others. But if it weren't almost ridiculous to even think it, I would have said that Edward's cock was beautiful. It was the absolute ideal length, width, shape, and size. It was the kind of cock that dildos should be modeled after. His dick was perfect.

At some point, I evidently just stopped moving and stared at him. My eyes may have glazed over and I know my jaw dropped a little, something Edward evidently took as a compliment since his smirk returned as he reached back to slowly peel off both his socks and deposit them neatly on the floor. "Like what you see?"

"Uh-huh." Good God, his dick had reduced me to monosyllabic responses.

"You did that on purpose, didn't you? Sneaky, Bella," he said mildly, still sitting between my knees.

"Oh my God." My hand was moving of its own accord, and I propped myself up on the opposite elbow so I could reach him. His eyes followed the progress of my hand as it skimmed lightly up his thigh and over his hipbone, but he shut them when I finally reached my goal and slowly wrapped my fingers around him.

"Ohhhhhh...fuuuuuuuuck," was his guttural response as I gave him an experimental squeeze. "Oh God, your hand...fuck..."

"We'll get there." Mindful now of the faint trembling that had started in his thighs, I slowly stroked upward from where I'd gripped him midshaft, watching as his thick tip swelled at the pressure, then relaxed when I stroked back down. The thought suddenly struck me that I wouldn't really mind if we stayed like this, my hand stroking him until he lost control, coming in hard spurts onto my body. I had a feeling that watching Edward come might be one of the most sublime things I'd get to see in my life.

The trembling in his thighs increased as Edward began mumbling profanity again. "Oh fuck, oh shit, Bella oh God, oh God...feels so good baby...ohhh..."

I tightened my grip and stroked a little more firmly, and his moans immediately increased in volume and frequency. "Ohhhh...baby, oh God, baby you've got to stop...you're gonna make me come..."

"That's the idea," I giggled. His hand unclenched from the bedspread and he put it over mine, stilling my movements as he sucked in a long ragged breath.

"You jerking me off until I come on you is not how our first time is going to go," he finally contradicted.

"I wouldn't mind you coming in my mouth," I whispered saucily.

"Jesus fuck...Bella, I want to be inside you now. Before I completely lose my fucking mind."

I smiled sweetly at him and wiggled my fingers, still pressed around his cock. He moved his own hand and I half-turned to fish the box of condoms out of my bedside table drawer. I'd just grabbed the box when I felt a single finger slip over my clit and then down along my drenched pussy.

It was like being electrocuted. I was incredibly aroused already, but the contact of his finger was like a live wire or a branding iron, tracing an acute line of fire through the heavy pleasure that was already pulsing there. I arched my back and whimpered, freezing with the box of condoms in my hand, as his finger reached my entrance and traced a circle in the wetness there.

"So pretty, so wet..." His finger was moving back up again, and this time when it reached my clit it lingered there, rubbing smaller circles. A tension that was like having my abdomen drawn together from the inside started building, and my body froze involuntarily.

"Turnabout is fair play." I could barely hear his voice over the roaring in my ears, but I knew it the second he lifted his finger away from my flesh.

"Whaaa..." I whined, feeling the imminent orgasm start to slip away. I opened my eyes to see Edward's jaw clenching as he shut his eyes.

"Bella...please get a condom on me now, before I lose my fucking mind."

I didn't even bother trying to open the small box neatly; I practically ripped it to pieces in my haste to get at the foil squares inside. I opened one more carefully, pinched the tip, placed it over the head of his cock, and then rolled it down. He shuddered hard, and as soon as the condom was completely seated over his length, he scooted back and then stretched out over me again.

"Are you sure you're okay with this, so fast?" he gasped against my ear.

Deciding to let my body do the talking, I tipped my pelvis so that he fell precisely where I wanted him. "I want you…Edward please, oh God please…"

The trembling that had been running through his body was even more pronounced now as he lowered his body closer to mine and placed a very long, sweet kiss on my lips. It was almost chaste, but it was in direct contrast to what was going on lower down.

The skin of his thighs slid against mine as he pushed into me, just a little bit. A gentle nibble on my lip and another push. A long swipe of his tongue that traced but didn't part my lips, and a deeper push. His hand came up to frame my face, and my mouth slowly opened under the gentleness of his as one final long stroke seated him completely inside me.

I gasped at the feeling of his hipbones against my inner thighs, but it disappeared into his mouth. He was kissing me with more force now as he slowly pulled out and then reentered me at the same pace. His lips quickly became urgent and demanding, and his thrusts into me soon followed suit, but his hand never strayed from where it cupped my face, and his thumb stroked gently over my cheekbone.

I wrapped my legs around his waist and he changed the angle of his thrusts so that the friction became almost maddening. I tugged on his hair and he sucked hard on the skin just behind my ear. By the time both of us were sliding down the inescapable slope to climax, we were gripping, clawing, pushing and crying until suddenly, we were there.

I came first, the searing sweet burn paralyzing me as one of Edward's plunges resulted in a hard firm pressure against both my clit and my pubis, pushing against my G-spot from the outside. It spread outward from there, aching, stiffening, flooding through my body, arching my back off the bed until with a cry I collapsed back against the bed and let the rhythmic pulses of my body push him over as well.

Edward managed a few more erratic thrusts before he came too, and some hazy part of my brain realized I'd been right: the sight of Edward Cullen coming was something that would be burned into my brain for the rest of my life.

He lay down carefully on top of me, our sweat-slick skin sliding easily together as we both just breathed for an endless moment. I felt him slowly softening inside of me, and he winced as he reached down to hold the base of the condom before pulling out. My hips popped agreeably as I finally closed my thighs together.

"Where should I, umm," Edward finally spoke, referring to the condom.

"Here, I'll take care of it." I gathered up all my will and heaved myself off the bed, taking the condom from him and heading down the hall to the bathroom. By the time I returned, Edward had rolled over onto his back and pulled the sheet up just enough to cover his hipbones. He smiled lazily and reached out his arms when I walked, slightly wobbly-legged, back into the room.

"Hey you," he whispered as soon as I was snuggled back into his embrace.

"Hey yourself."

"That was…I mean, I wanted it to be a little more planned out for our first time…and I swear to God I usually last longer than that, but oh God Bella…"

"Hush up," I mumbled, curling tighter against him. "That was perfect. Two thumbs up. Fucking amazing. I want more."

"But I wanted it to be more than just a quick…"

"Edward," I cut him off. "You…we…were amazing. Beyond amazing. You'd get a big stamp of approval from any woman, let alone a porn star."

I don't know if it was the lack of blood in my brain or what, but within a couple of heartbeats I realized that Edward's entire body had stiffened under me, the arm wrapped around my back as hard as iron. And then it hit me what I'd said, even though I'd meant it in jest.

"Oh shit," I muttered, "I didn't mean that. Wrong thing to say. I didn't mean it like that, it's just…"

He exhaled slowly, and then he slowly began to stroke my hair. "It's okay. That was a compliment, I get it. I should take it as such."

"Edward…"

"No, baby…it's okay. Relax. Just be here with me right now, okay? Just you…" here he paused and punctuated what he was saying with a kiss on the top of my head, "…and me. That was amazing, and I can't wait to do it again. Okay?"

"Okay," I whispered, burrowing my face into his skin. Post-orgasmic high, sex-brain, we'd blame it on that. I just needed to make sure it didn't happen again.

.

.

.

A/N:

Oooh la la, some quick and to-the-point lemonade! Edward may have had more planned for their first time, but it's real life and there's always their second time…and third…and so on!

Edward seems to be sorting through his issues remarkably well…maybe? Let me know what you think: could you be in a relationship with an adult actor/actress, even if the feelings and connection are there? And will these two?

There were a few reasons for the delay in this update, but I can pretty much guarantee they won't happen again (RL+writers block+etc etc etc). Feel free to hit me up for a follow on Twitter, I'm lazykatevamp over there and love hearing from you! Until next time!