I know I promised some of you a new chapter by Monday, but then I got sick, so this chapter is a little delayed. I apologize, but hey, at least it's here now. Enjoy! Oh, and thanks for all your lovely reviews.

These disclaimers are depressing.

Chapter Thirteen: The Whiteboard Analysis

"You look awfully happy today,"

Howard looked over his shoulder as he worked on setting up the gaming system, smiling slightly. Of course he was happy, this could be it! "Well, I am," He told Leonard – the one who had made the comment.

"Someone's getting laid tonight!" Raj whispered just a little too loudly to Leonard and both of them held back a laugh.

"Ha ha, very funny," Howard said.

"Was that sarcasm?" Sheldon asked.

"Yes, genius,"

"Alright!" Sheldon said, proud of himself. "I'm 12 for 42 this month!"

"Seriously though," Howard said, ignoring the theoretical physicist. "Do you guys want to know?"

"Sure," Raj said at the same time Leonard said "Okay," and Sheldon said "Do I look like I care?"

Howard cast look at Sheldon before continuing. "Remember when I told you that Bernadette didn't want to have kids?"

"Yeah," Raj said at the same time Leonard said "Uh huh," and Sheldon said "Of course I do, I have an eidetic memory."

"Well," Howard continued. "Some stuff has gone down lately and she…she changed her mind, and we're trying to get pregnant."

"Congratulations!" Raj said at the same time Leonard said "Oh my God!" and Sheldon said "Oh no, you can't bring your progeny here."

"Why not?"

Sheldon shook his head. "As I have said before, babies are loud. They cry, they eat, they sleep, they poop, it's all they do. I will not allow one to disturb the peace!"

"Okay, so let me get this straight," Leonard said, leaning forward while Howard joined them on the couch. "You were considering making babies with Amy via test tube only months after you met her, but if Howard and Bernadette have a baby they can't bring him or her along when they come over? I'm sensing a double standard here."

"Leonard, if Amy and I were to procreate, our child would be extremely gifted. Just think about what our minds could achieve if they were combined in the form of an infant. He or she would have the best genetics, Leonard! It isn't a double standard, it's a fact!"

Leonard simply rolled his eyes, picking up a controller.

When Bernadette, Penny and Amy entered 4A, the guys were already halfway through their first round of vintage games. When they saw the women entered they were immediately distracted from their game – well, Howard, Leonard and Raj were – and they paused it. Sheldon was clearly not happy with being interrupted, but for once he didn't say anything as Amy moved to sit on the arm of his chair.

"Hey," Penny said, sitting next to Leonard and throwing her legs across his lap. "Guess what I got in the mail today?" She ran her fingers up and down his chest, smiling widely from the excitement that was threatening to boil over.

Leonard thought about this for a second before he realized what she was talking about. "Oh my God, they sent you the script?" Penny nodded and Leonard kissed her cheek. "That's awesome! You're totally going to get the part!"Penny grinned and turned her face so that their lips met, tossing her arms around his neck.

"Hey you," Howard said to Bernadette as she sat down next to him, and they kissed.

"Umm, just so you know," Bernadette whispered when they pulled apart. "I kind of told the girls we were trying,"

"Really? I just told the guys,"

"Really?"

They looked over to their friends, who were sitting in awkward silence, clearly not knowing what to say since they all thought they were supposed to be keeping their mouths shut. Penny crossed her legs, and then uncrossed them again. Raj shifted in his seat. Sheldon gave Amy his koala smile.

"Alright guys," Bernadette said. "You can talk about it, everyone knows."

There was a collective sigh of relief.

"Isn't this so exciting?"

"Oh, thank Cow! I don't think I could've kept that in any longer!"

"We're so happy for you guys!"

"You are not bringing the child here!"

"Can't you just imagine a tiny little Howard and Bernadette? Like, really tiny?"

"Well, like I said, Bernadette's not actually pregnant yet," Howard said, reaching for his wife's hand.

"But, hopefully soon we'll have a little Wolowitz on the way!" Bernadette finished for him.

"We could actually calculate the likelihood of you being pregnant," Amy said to Bernadette before turning to Leonard. "Can I borrow your board?" When he nodded, Amy got up and walked over to the whiteboard, erasing the faint remains of equations and then uncapping a green Expo marker. "So, Bernadette, when was the date of your last menstrual cycle?"

The microbiologist frowned. "Excuse me?"

"No one cares!" Amy said dismissively. "Sheldon has Penny's written on the calendar!"

"What?" shrieked the blonde waitress. "What the Hell, Sheldon?"

Sheldon looked down. "And it's very accurate, seeing as my calendar dictates she would be getting very cranky in the next few days…"

Penny snorted and glared at him before burrowing her face into Leonard's shoulder.

"Bernadette?" Amy repeated, one eyebrow raised.

The microbiologist in question huffed. "The 14th,"

Amy wrote this down on the board. "Now, since your last cycle, how many times have you and Howard had unprotected intercourse?"

"Amy!"