Thanks so much for reviewing to everyone. To those who couldn't get my reply back to your reviews, Thank you. I wish I could've personally thanked you through me but alas it couldn't happen but I am shocked that i got more than 10. I really only was expecting about 6 maybe 8 tops, not over ten so thank you guys for reviewing and helping me reach my goal. Anyways, this story is almost, just a few more chapter before the epilogue and I can start working on the sequel. Hope you enjoy reading this chapter and again please review so I can update faster. Thank you all again!

She felt horrible and sick and lonely. She felt like a mess and it didn't help that she actually did look one. Her hair was limp, her face blotchy and red from crying, her eyes swollen. She felt tired. Drained. Useless.

She had done it. She had finally given up her fantasies and stories. And it hurt. It squeezed her chest like a boa constrictor until she felt like she couldn't breathe. This was horrible and she hated herself for doing this but it was necessary.

It was time for her to grow up. She had been hanging on to her childhood and the rope had finally broke as she grew and refused to grow up. But now, it was time and she hated every minute of it. Her flame had diminished and she felt like she was freezing from the despair and confusion.

She wanted to stay on the ground, kneeling on the cold and let herself get sick as her tears dried on her cheeks and clothes and thighs. She wanted to, she was tempted to but knew that it wasn't going to fix anything.

She wanted to see him again. She wanted to see the white haired boy, Jack Frost. She wanted him to be here, with her, warming her insides, causing her heart to race and her palms to sweat and the butterflies to break out all over her body. She didn't just like him. It was something else. Something deeper. Something she had no name for because she had never experienced this before.

She felt calm and joyful in his presence. She wanted to get to know him. She wanted to be there for him, wanted to know everything about him, what made him angry and what made him happy. She felt like she had known him for months rather than days but then reality came knocking on her window and she was forced to wake up from her dream.

Jack Frost wasn't real. He never was. The feelings that she associated with him whenever she thought about him and saw him were just that. Feelings. Feelings she could banish with time. Feelings that never existed.

Forcing herself, she stood up on shaky legs and felt herself sway with dizziness. She needed to eat something but she had no desire to. She would check on Sophie and Jamie, to make sure they were okay and then go back to her room and cry herself into oblivion.

Walking like an old woman, she checked on Sophie's room and saw her sleeping soundly with her stuffed toy and blanket. She smiled softly, a flicker of warmth fluttering her heart before the cold wind of despair blew it out. With her throat thick with emotion, she closed the door and headed to Jamie's room.

She was about to knock until he heard him talk urgently to someone. Frowning, she opened the door a crack and stuck her head in. Jamie was sitting cross-legged on his bed with a stuffed bunny in front of him. He was talking to it and she didn't understand why he was up so late.

"Okay, look. You and I are obviously at what they call a crossroads. So, here's what gonna happen. If it wasn't a dream, if you are real, then you have to prove it. Like right now."

Kailani felt her heart squeeze painfully at the sight of a hopeful Jamie looking at a bunny. "I believed in you for a long time, okay. Like, my whole life in fact. So you kinda owe me now. You don't have to do much. Just a little sign. Anything. Anything at all."

She couldn't take it. She pushed the door open and stepped in. "Jamie?" She asked, her voice cracking with emotion.

"Kai..." He said and the way he looked at her, with dimming hope sliced into her heart. She avoided his gaze, looking at the window, feeling something tugging at her but she didn't pay it mind.

"Why aren't you sleeping?" She murmured as she stepped in and sat on his bed, tucking one leg under the other.

"I was trying to get proof of the Easter Bunny."

She winced and grabbed the bunny, looking at him, feeling something tugging at her again but she ignored it. It was too late for her. And maybe for Jamie. She didn't say nothing as she caressed the bunny, looking at him, feeling something in her heart grow but ignored it. It was fake. Not real. Not real...

"You believe in the Easter Bunny, right Kai?" Jamie asked as he looked at her and she turned to see him, feeling so empty and drained. What could she say to him? What could she do?

She sighed and placed the bunny on the bed, right next to Jamie. "You do, right?"

She hated the pleading in his voice because it told her how weak and useless she was.

"Are you crying?" Jamie asked and she blinked, looking at him, feeling self-conscious. "Your eyes are swollen."

"I'm fine. Just tired."

About everything.

"Well, do you-"

"Jamie," She said interrupting his question because she knew she was going to hurt him and that was the last thing she wanted to do. She didn't want him to get hurt like she did when their father died. She didn't want him to get hurt like she did when her mother left Kailani to do all the work, raising them, caring them, feeding them for three years. She didn't want him to suffer like she was at this moment.

She felt this huge gaping hole in her chest that seemed to suck the life out of her as she gave up the fight of holding on. It was a losing battle and she knew she was going to lose but she was just avoiding the inevitable.

She was avoiding growing up. But now it was time to let go because if she kept doing this to herself, she was going to burn herself out and be completely useless to Jamie and Sophie. "I'm going to tell you a story."

Jamie cocked his head, confusion written all over his face. A face that reminded her of her father and that twinge gripped her heart. "There was a girl who had loving parents. Her father told her stories about the tooth fairy, the sandman, the easter bunny, Santa Claus and Jack Frost."

Her heart broke again at the sound of his name. Oh, how she wanted him to be real. How she wanted him to be with her. But he wasn't real. He never was and that hurt more than the entire pain of the world.

"Her father told her stories about these guardians who protected children, naughty or nice, good or bad. They protected them and in turn, the children believed in them. Their belief gave these guardians the power to bring joy to children all over the world." She was finding it hard to continue this story, because this story was about her. This was her life and it hurt to talk about it.

She had walked to the slightly open window, placing her hand on the window. There was that tug again, fierce now as she felt a certain warmth coming in from outside, causing her heart to race and butterflies to break out. She knew this feeling but beat it back violently. This was not real. He was not real. She had to stop living in the fantasy world and grow up.

"But her father left and never came back." Her voice cracked but she cleared her throat. She stared at the window, not wanting to leave for some reason.

"And when he left, he took back his stories about the guardians."

"And the girl?" Jamie asked and Kailani closed her eyes, the pain coming now as she felt a lone tear fall. She felt the wind blow in, almost like a caress and she almost felt calm.

"She tried to believe. She tried so hard but she was growing up and it was getting harder for her to believe in them. Her father was gone. Her mother..." Here her anger spiked as she opened her eyes, feeling something pulling her towards the right side of the window, begging her to turn her head and she thought she heard the wind whisper her name but she ignored it. This was over. It would always be over.

"Her mother was never really there. But one of the guardians came to see her and for the first time, she felt alive and happy because she knew her father's stories were real." She smiled now, recalling the memory of Jack Frost. The way he looked and talked. The way he seemed as if he was about burst open with extreme joy. The way he made her feel.

"They got to know each other over time and her belief was growing strong." She breathes in the chill of the wind, feeling something from outside.

"He left and never came back and she started to lose her belief."

"Why?" Jamie asked and she sighed heavily before turning back to him.

"Because he left her alone. Like her father and her mother and the stories and the boy who visited her made her feel alive and happy. Something she hadn't felt for a long time. But when the guy left her alone, she gave up. She couldn't take any more people leaving her."

Because she had fallen in love.

With him.

And it hurt that her feelings of love and happiness and joy were fake and a part of dream and it hurt that she was so stupid to believe that she could be in love with a ghost, a dream when all she ever felt was anger, towards her mother, towards her father, towards herself. This was stupid. She was stupid for believing, even for a minute, that she could be in love with Jack Frost, stupid to believe that she could be happy and free, something she hadn't felt in a long time, not since her father died. She was so stupid to believe that Jack Frost was the one who could bring those emotions inside her to the surface. She was stupid and it hurt her that even thought what she felt may have felt real to her, it was in fact not. Those feeling were an illusion, a trick to snare her in and she was dumb to have fallen for it.

And it hurt.

Because this was the real world. She was a part of it whether she wanted to be or not.

Jamie looked at her, his face twisted up in wonder and confusion.

"Since then, she stopped trying to believe in the guardians anymore because they disappointed her. He disappointed her. It hurt too much for her to keep holding on." She sat down on the bed and picked up the bunny, trying to hide her tears from Jamie.

"Jamie, I don't think I can believe in the easter bunny anymore like the girl from the dream. I think someone would need proof to believe and for me, that hasn't happened. Not for a long time. Not since..." She choked up and looked at the bunny, almost crushing it in her hands before continuing. Why did this hurt so bad?

"So until I have actual proof, I don't think I can believe in them. But you can." She cupped his chin, feeling her heart squeeze with grief and resignation.

"You don't have to give up. You're young and full of joy and happiness. I love you no matter what I choose to believe in. What matters is that I believe in you."

Jamie looked up at her and gave a hesitant smile. She hugged him, wanting to feel something ever since the whole seeing things picked up. She wanted a shred of hope, of warmth, of security from the white haired boy who awoke feelings in her she thought she never had.

But she couldn't. Because he wasn't real.

He never was. And she didn't know which hurt more.

Giving up in a fantasy she didn't want leave or believing in a fantasy and having reality crush it like glass.

"I'm heading to bed. I'll be in there if you need anything, okay?" She said, pulling back and felt her heart drop at the look of loss in his eyes.

"Okay," he mumbled but didn't move. She got up and kissed his forehead, close to breaking down again. She quickly fled his room, closing the door and rushed to her room, breaking down in shoulder shaking sobs.

Jamie was giving up and it was all her fault.

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