Disclaimer: Dick Wolf owns the characters

Alternative Title: "Stabler's Downfall"

15. Man Of The House

"Hey!", Elliot whispered as he saw her opening her eyes slowly.

"Hey.", Olivia said, too.

"I was so afraid of losing you. Both."

"I'm sorry, El. I couldn't tell you."

"Shhh, I understand. Did you speak with Dr. Greene?"

"Yes."

"I know it's hard for you to tell, but you have to…"

"I want to have that child, Elliot. You set yourself clear that you don't have another child, but maybe that's my last chance to have one more baby."

"Liv, don't be selfish."

"You talk about selfishness? You only think about yourself. You got six children…"

"The doctor said that if there is a chance for the baby to be born, it would be disabled. Brain damage, paraplegia…"

"I'm gonna raise that child. With or without you."

He held her hand and nodded. Olivia closed her eyes and felt a sharp pain.

"You want me to call a nurse?"

"Just tell me how's Eleanor."

"She's asking for you. Kathy and Lizzie are taking care of her. Don't worry…", he burst into tears. "I can't lose you! I was so afraid ,Liv!"

She touched his head.

"I need you, El. Don't leave me now."

Munch came back to the squadroom. Captain Cragen was waiting for him to arrive.

"Tell me the news, John."

"The surgery was successful. They are waiting to see if there's rejection."

"Thank God a transplant was found!"

"Yes. Have you found Ken?"

"Unfortunately no. John, why don't you go home? You can't help and you look like hell."

"Sometimes, I wish I were them. I got nothing to lose, I got nobody to care for me. No wife, no children. I've seen many colleagues die in duty, commit suicide, get shot, have accidents. And there was always a weeping wife, orphan children. All we're trying to do is helping other people."

"That's part of our job, John. We've all experienced those things. But, we still have to carry on and help those who need us."

"Life is a bitch, Captain. Call me if you have any sign of Ken."

At the evening Elliot went once again to the hospital holding a bouquet to see his wife only to find Brian already there.

Olivia was asleep, but he was standing next to her holding her hand and caressing her head. Then he whispered something to her and touched her abdomen.

Then, the idea crossed Elliot's mind. He left the hospital immediately. He kicked the door of his car, he hit his knuckles on the roof. The thought haunted him till he arrived at Queens. He kept thinking that the child wasn't his, but Cassidy's.

It was rather late. He kissed goodnight his younger children and sat on his armchair. He couldn't quit the thought. The door opened and it was Kathleen.

"Dad? What are you doing here?"

"I'll stay the night with you. Your mother is with Bill. Where have you been?"

"To Anne."

"Your mom told me that you don't go to your classes anymore."

"I'm just a little tired. And I don't like Psychology."

"It was your decision to study Psychology."

"Yeah, but then I realized that I don't like it. Is that a crime?"

"You could have told us."

"Like you care! You never care about what I want to do."

"Because every time you wanted to do something it was either risky or illegal."

"I'm not gonna discuss it with you. You'll not understand. I have to go."

"You've just come. And it's late."

"None of your business."

" Kathleen! Kath…!"

She opened the door and he grabbed her.

"You're not gonna stop me, dad."

Elliot went to Liz's room and woke her up.

"Lizzie, I'm sorry, but I have to go."

"I heard you, daddy. I know where's she's going."

"Really?"

"I can't tell you. She'll hate me. "

"Please, Liz. I have to know."

"It's acting classes in Brooklyn. I overheard her talking to the phone."

"Can you keep an eye on Eli and Eleanor?"

"Don't go there dad."

"I didn't learn that from you, girl. I'll be back."

He felt his blood pressure rising. He finally found the building and his daughter exiting. Kathleen was with a man in his mid-fifties. He was holding her tight into his arms and he kissed her. Elliot rushed there.

"What the fuck are you doing with my daughter, dude?", Elliot yelled and grabbed him.

"Dad!"

"So, you're Mr. Stabler."

"Detective Stabler."

"You didn't tell me your father is a policeman. Congratulations, Kathleen is really talented. I am Professor Henry Belinger."

"You're a bastard! Stay away from my daughter!"

"She can be a great actress, you know."

"Leave us alone! You don't give a shit about her talent. All you want is to screw her. I know you guys!"

"Dad, you got no idea! I'm not coming with you."

" …", Belinger tried to say.

"Enough! Kathleen, come with me!"

"I'm not your dog!", she said.

He grabbed her and put her to the car. They were both silent for several moments.

"Now, tell me."

"I got nothing to tell you."

"Do you really want to be an actress?"

"Acting is my dream."

"Your dream, my ass.", he chuckled.

"You are the one who told to follow our dreams. That's what I want to do, you can't stop me. Henry showed me the way. I'm his muse."

"That's what Henry wants you to do. You know why? Because he needs a slut to screw."

"Stop it! He loves me and he says that I have talent. He's like a father to me."

"You have a father. And that's called incest."

"He gives me love and affection. He cares about me. You don't. You're just fled. You were always gone."

"Bullshit! You're not gonna see him never again!"

"You bet! You can't tell me what to do. You're a loser, dad. You only make things worse. So, don't tell me what to do!"

He slapped her and she got out of the car.

"Come back!", he yelled.

"Not with you! I hate you. Dick was right. You were better off dead!"

Elliot had some drinks before he passed by John's place.

"Disturbing you?", he said.

"Yes. Actually, I had sex with two playmates. Dammit, Elliot! Come inside!"

He sunk into the armchair.

"What a nice feeling to sit on an armchair, don't you think? It's my place at home. I feel as if I were a king. Funny thing? I don't have a home anymore!", he scoffed.

"I'll make you a coffee."

"You think I need your fucking coffee? The king is dead! Long live the king!"

"Booze is not good to your health, you know. I'm an old man! I can't drag you to the hospital! Black coffee is the best I can do for you!"

"My children hate me! Maureen left. Kathleen wants to be an actress and a geezer shags her! My wife is shot and she is gonna have an ill baby. And probably not mine, but Cassidy's!"

"Oh boy, I thought that four divorces were dramatic!"

"My life is a fuck up!"

"Look on the bright side, El. You can still fix things."

"Fix things?", he scoffed.

"You sent everyone away."

"Fuck off, Munch!"

"I have to sleep. Coffee is in the cupboard. I'll get you a pillow and a blanket."

Elliot had already fallen asleep. The next morning his head was heavy. He heard his phone ringing.

"Hey, Kathy!"

"Way to go, Elliot! Kathleen left home to live with her love of her life!"

"What?"

"You can't handle things right!"

"Kathy…"

"I don't want to hear anything!"

She quitted the phone. He sighed and headed to the bathroom, where Munch was having a shower.

"Will you join me, sweetheart?"

"Sorry!", he mumbled.

"You need a shower, too. You smell like a drunken whore."

"Shut up, John! My head is aching."

"I couldn't sleep all night. You were sneezing and talking in your sleep."

"Hey, what time is it?"

"Eight. You should have been at work already!"

"Fuck!"

"Have a nice day, El!"

He arrived at the squadroom.

"Elliot, you are late!", Cragen told him.

He sat on his desk. There was no one else around.

"I know I'm late."

"There will be a new staff temporarily. You have to show them around. Are you ok?"

Elliot frowned.

"Have you drunk?", Cragen continued.

"You missed good old days, captain?", he chuckled.

"Take it easy, Stabler. You're stepping out of line."

Two hours later, Elliot was still feeling the effects of the hungover.

Brian Cassidy came to the station. That was when Elliot saw red. He jumped off his chair and punched Brian. He kept slogging and swearing until Munch and Cragen urged to split them.

"You're an asshole, Stabler! That's why you are left alone!"

Elliot rushed on him once again and blew him till Brian lost his conscience and fell on the floor.

Cragen pulled him into his office and he was really mad at him.

"You're a nutcase, Stabler! You are out of control. Enough is enough!"

"Captain…"

"We're done! Hand me your badge and your gun. You are suspended. I have to think very well whether you will ever come back."

Poor thing