Hi readers! :) Thanks for coming back for the latest installment. Sorry again about the delay. :( In my defense, this time my internet was down. I had it ready about a week ago. BUT STILL. You're here and you're reading. Thanks! :) Updates should be more regular from here on out (crosses fingers). I finally figured out where I want this story to go, and I'm about halfway through the next chapter. We are nearing the end, believe it or not! And it IS going to be an Anko/Oro story. (heehee). I'm excited.
Enjoy some more WAM!
As the door to Kakashi's apartment building closed behind them and they stepped out into the cool evening air, Kakshi couldn't help but notice the way Anko held his arm a little more tightly than usual.
"Are you cold?" he asked, raising an eyebrow.
"No," Anko replied.
"Oh."
Kakashi let it go at that for the time being, but he couldn't help but press the matter further as she almost tripped him when they crossed the road in front of the apartments.
"Are you sure you're okay? You're walking really close…"
"I'm fine."
It was then that Kakashi realized what was actually going on: Anko Mitarashi was nervous. A small smile formed under his mask.
"You're nervous, aren't you?" Kakashi asked.
"No!"
"Yes you are!"
Anko pursed her lips, glaring at him out of the corner of her eye.
"Am not."
"Anko…" Kakashi angled his head questioningly. It was only a matter of waiting for her to admit it. She was clearly lying.
Finally, his companion relented.
"Maybe a little bit."
Kakashi put his arm around her, drawing her even closer.
"See, was that so hard?" he asked, hugging her. "It's okay to be a little bit anxious about things sometimes. You're about to share some big news."
"But they're just my friends!" Anko whined, stamping her foot. "I can step into hostile territory without breaking a sweat, I can throw a kunai with perfect accuracy even when I'm surrounded by enemy on all sides… why am I panicking over a little dinner party?"
"Anko, you're comfortable with all of that stuff because you're accustomed to it," Kakashi explained. "This is scary because it's brand new. You've never had to tell a group of friends that you were pregnant before."
"Do you have to say that word?" Anko demanded, rolling her eyes. "It's so weird and gross."
"Pregnant?" Kakashi asked. He had to stifle a laugh.
"Yes, that one!"
"Well you're going to be saying it in a few minutes," he pointed out. "I think you would only be making the situation more awkward by saying something like 'I'm with child' or 'I'm in a family way' or better yet, 'I got knocked up…'"
"You're not funny, knock it off."
"I find it all quite humorous."
"Yeah, I bet you do."
The two continued on with playful banter like this as they walked past the row of well-lit shops leading to Ichiraku's ramen. Anko was beginning to loosen up a little bit, and as soon as the familiar smell of chicken broth and noodle dough met them outside the shop, she felt entirely relaxed and ready to meet her public. Kakashi led her through the entryway under the cloth awning to the sea of familiar faces waiting inside.
And at the sight of them, Anko was suddenly terrified all over again. Kakashi felt her hand tense and inwardly groaned. Things were about to get awkward.
"Anko, it's so wonderful to see you!" Kurenai exclaimed, jumping up. She held out her arms for a hug, but Anko's only response was to back up as though her friend carried a deadly disease. She knew that the second Kurenai pulled her close, she would feel the rigid bump that was six months' worth of baby growth.
Kurenai, knowing none of this, stopped in her tracks. Her expression was one of confusion and hurt.
"Let's just sit down," Kakashi suggested, doing his best to dissipate the awkward moment. "There are a lot of things that we need to talk about."
Kurenai nodded and hurried back to her seat.
"We've saved you two a couple of seats in the middle," Iruka said. "Right here next to Gai."
"Thank you," Kakashi replied. "Why don't you sit between Gai and me, Anko?"
Anko nodded and sat down quickly, her eyes never leaving the floor.
"I don't think there's much use for pretense anymore, so I'm just going to go ahead and spit this out," Kakashi sighed. "That is, if you don't mind, Anko…?"
The stiff and uncomfortable woman on his right shook her head quickly, as though to say that she was in favor of anything that prevented her from having to share the news herself.
"Okay then. We decided to get everyone together tonight to explain why Anko's been hiding away since her last mission ended. She's not sick, so don't worry about that… she's just been struggling a little bit with how to tell you all this. Everybody, Anko's pregnant."
A hush fell over the table, and Anko could feel the blood in her veins turn to ice.
"Kakashi, are you…?" Genma's voice trailed off, but Kakashi knew exactly what was coming. He had been expecting it.
"I'm not the father," he said matter-of-factly. "But we know who is, and he isn't in a position to take any responsibility for the child's well-being, so I am doing so in his place. At least for now."
The silence was unbearable – until Kurenai mercifully broke it.
"Anko, I don't know what to say," she whispered. "Except… why did you wait so long to tell us?"
"It's complicated," Anko replied, finally looking up. Tears sparkled at the corners of her eyes. "I obviously wasn't planning on getting pregnant, and it certainly didn't happen on purpose. It was hard for me to accept… and let's just say it happened under strange circumstances. I was struggling to deal with everything, and I didn't want to be a burden on everyone else, too."
"Anko, you've never been a burden," Kurenai sighed, getting to her feet. "You should know that. You're our best friend – we want to share stuff like this with you. Let us help you. Your world isn't ending, it's just changing. You're moving onto the next phase of your life."
Kurenai bent down next to Anko's chair and put her arms around her friend's shoulders. Anko wanted to return the embrace, but all she managed to do was fall limp into Kurenai's arms – because the words she said words meant nothing.
They might have been nice to hear – that is, if Kurenai had any idea what she was talking about. But she didn't, or she wouldn't have said any of it. After all, she probably just assumed that the baby was the result of a one-night stand with some jounin from another village who didn't want to bother with fatherhood. Little did she know, it was so much more complicated than that.
The baby's father was a cold-blooded killer, and the worst traitor Konoha had ever seen. This wasn't a problem that could fade away or be remedied by a few kind words and a few friends rallying around her to help her pay bills.
"We were so worried, Anko," Iruka said, laughing weakly. "We thought you were sick or dying. This is a beautiful thing, though. Children are a blessing!"
"If you say so," Anko sighed.
What was the use? She couldn't exactly share the truth with any of those people. First of all, they'd panic, and worse yet, they would probably try to get involved and track down Orochimaru on their own. She wasn't going to get anyone else wrapped up in her problems. Not again.
It was a bit of a shame, though, she realized as an afterthought. These were people she had once trusted with the greatest secrets of her life. And that hadn't even been so long ago. Months, even. Practically days. Yet they suddenly seemed to be an ocean away from her, living on an entirely different plane of existence.
"Well, the cat's out of the bag," Kakashi said, trying to draw attention away from Anko as discreetly as he could. "Why don't we all just eat a hot meal and enjoy one another's company?"
The meal went on almost as normal. They each took their turn to order drinks, and Anko realized with a bit of distaste that she was the only one – along with Gai, who chose never to drink – who didn't order an alcoholic beverage. She had hoped that maybe at least one of her friends would be sympathetic to her plight and commiserate with her over a glass of water or soda, but it wasn't to be. Instead, she sat in a sea of cocktails, disgruntledly sipping a marble soda.
"What's the baby's gender, Anko?" Iruka asked as Ayame took dinner orders.
"It's a boy," Anko mumbled.
"Congratulations!" Kurenai said, smiling weakly. It was clear she hadn't gotten over her hug having been turned down earlier, but she was doing her best to recover and be encouraging.
"Yeah," Anko replied.
"Do… do you have much stuff yet?" Iruka asked. "I suppose you're going to need a crib, a changing table, and some more things like that."
Anko gave Kakashi a quick look. They couldn't exactly come right out and say that she was practically on lock-down at Kakashi's apartment and was only allowed to get a dinner out because at least five other jounin were going to be there. So how to respond to a question like that?
"I… I need to go to the bathroom," Anko said, quickly getting up. As she left the table, she could hear Kakshi's words drifting back to her. It was something about not much time, Anko's been very tired… bullshit. All of it was bullshit. Her stomach churned as the anger rose up inside of her, and when she finally arrived at the small restroom and threw open the door, she had to rest for a moment against one of the concrete walls.
But when she did, she was suddenly distracted from her anger, because shet felt a stabbing pain in her abdomen. Inadvertently, she gasped out loud.
"What's going on?" she murmured, pulling up her shirt. She almost though she could see a difference in the shape of her baby bump, but that seemed silly. It hardly had much room to move in there. For a fleeting moment she wondered if it was a result of the botched abortion. But that was ridiculous. It wouldn't suddenly happen months after the fact. That was outrageously irrational. Her stomach was probably just cramping, and having the baby in there made it worse. Nothing could actually be wrong with her or the baby, or she would have known much sooner… right?
Splashing a bit of cool water on her face and taking a deep breath, Anko realized that there was nothing to do but go back to the table where her peers sat, sipping cocktails and making polite conversation. For a little while after she took her seat again, she looked for an opportune moment to lean in and warn Kakashi that something might be wrong.
But, as dinner was served alongside more careful, evasive conversation and nervous laughter, Anko realized that this was hardly the time.
"You could have at least tried to make conversation," Kakashi insisted as they crossed the street in front of Ichiraku's. "They just wanted to hear how you're doing."
"What would we have talked about?" Anko asked. "What color I'm painting the nursery? How much weight I've gained? That's a bunch of bullshit and you know it. There's so much more to this situation than that."
"It's not their fault we can't tell them who the baby's father is," Kakashi replied. "You could have just talked about generic things about the baby. Like when your due date is. That's the kind of thing people like to hear."
"It's always about the baby, isn't it?" Anko demanded, her voice breaking. "There isn't any 'me' anymore. Nobody wants to know stuff like what I've done to stay busy all cooped up for the last six months. People used to ask me questions about what movies I'd seen recently or if I'd tried the new teahouse in town. I'm still here, but I'm invisible. What about me?"
"Anko – that's not what I meant. It's just that – Anko? Are you listening?"
"I saw something move back there," Anko said softly. "Back in that alley."
Kakashi immediately grabbed Anko's hand and pulled her closer.
"Who's there?" he demanded, pulling up his forehead protector to reveal his sharingan eye.
Anko wasn't sure if she had been drugged, hit, or if her blood pressure had finally just hit rock bottom, but she felt her vision blurring.
"Kakashi?" she asked, trying to extend her arm out towards where she thought he had been standing. "What's going on?"
However, there was no response. Anko only felt herself being pulled into the chest of someone strong, lean, and unfamiliar before everything went black.