"You're clear to come through, SG-7," Hammond said into the radio. SG-7 was on the other side of the Gate, ready to come home and explain the "snag," and he couldn't wait to hear it. He'd heard every kind of story out there: weddings, funerals, adoption, being mistaken for gods, being mistaken for reincarnated family members…There was little he hadn't heard in his time at the SGC.

The iris opened, and the four members of SG-7 came through a minute later. All four of them looked exhausted, and as they reached the end of the ramp they plopped down on the floor. One man even went so far as to lie down, letting out a tired "Oohhhh-ohh."

Hammond entered the Gate room, slightly amused. He arrived there just in time to hear, "What's that sound?" "Silence, my friend." "Oh. Thought it sounded weird."

"I take it you've been somewhere noisy?" Hammond said, approaching the fatigued team.

All four of them did not get up, but they did salute. "Yes, sir," Lieutenant Markham said from the floor.

"Are any of you injured?"

Stephens looked himself over. "Don't think so, sir. Just really reeeaallly tired."

Hammond nodded, reminding himself that SG-7 would have mentioned in their transmission if they had fallen prey to some sort of illness. "Then the four of you should get to the infirmary."

General Hammond had a very few amusing minutes as he watched SG-7 attempt and fail to get to their feet. Finally, he took pity on them and asked for a medteam with wheelchairs to help them. He followed them down to the infirmary, wondering just what had made the four men so tired, but as he got closer to the infirmary he forgot all about it.

Daniel was screaming.

Hammond pushed past SG-7 and their attendants and burst into the infirmary in time to see Jack scooping up Daniel from his bed and trying to wake him.

"What happened?" he demanded of Major Carter.

"Daniel started having a nightmare, and we've been trying to wake him up for the past five minutes," she said, sounding very frightened.

"C'mon, Daniel, c'mon," Jack was saying, rubbing Daniel's back. Hammond wondered why Jack didn't try shaking him, but then he remembered that Daniel might not take to that too well while still in the throes of a nightmare.

Nurses streamed past all of them to the newly-arrived SG-7 team, all of whom were holding their ears.

"Aw, man. It's like we're still there," Stephens complained. "What happened to Dr. Jackson?"

"It's…Dr. Jackson," Markham answered.

--

After their abortive escape attempt, the three Almadans had been placed in separate cells. Karl and Mara saw one another over meals, which they were allowed to take together, but Jack insisted that Karres be kept on his own. So he was alone in his cell when Jack burst in, looking furious and ready to kill.

"What the HELL did you DO to him?!" he demanded, advancing on the physician.

"To whom are you referring?" Karres asked calmly.

"You know very well 'whom,'" Jack said sharply. "I just got done calming him out of yet another nightmare. Why is he so terrified? Huh? Why does he start screaming while he's asleep? What did you do to him?"

"I have merely tried to help him," Karres told him. "I tried to help him by giving him a chance to have a second, happier childhood, and then I tried to help him appreciate his new chances and family. That is all. It isn't my fault he is singularly unappreciative."

"Bull," Jack said rudely. "You did something to him that traumatized him. He's spent a lot of his life dealing with a lot of pain, and something you did to him brought it all to the forefront again in addition to the new pain you caused him. Now, I'm going to say this very simply: What did you do to him?"

"Nothing that I haven't already told you," Karres assured him.

"Damn you to hell!" Jack swore. "All right, better question. How do we make him his proper size again?"

"He'll have to grow into it, like I've been saying."

"That's a lie," Jack snapped. "If you do something, you have to know how to undo it. So, how do we undo it?"

Karres was silent for a moment. "Did you ever consider, Colonel, that perhaps this is how everything is supposed to be? That Daniel is supposed to be with Karl and Mara now? That the One sent him to our planet for a purpose?"

"No, I never considered it," Jack admitted. "And I don't intend to start now. I'll be back later, and you better have something good to tell me then. Got it?"

"My answer then will be the same as it is now," Karres promised him.

Jack snarled something that sounded like "rat bastard" and stalked out. Karres smiled. Eventually, if he had enough time, he would be able to wear them down. They would have to agree with him sometime.

--

Jack stormed through the halls of the base, contemplating murder. Preferably a long, drawn-out, excruciatingly painful murder. How could Karres keep up the lie that he'd done Daniel a favor? How ridiculous was that? How long did he expect them to just swallow what he said?

He found himself wishing for a baseball bat. He'd hit a home run using Karres' head.

Still, he reflected, it wouldn't do Daniel any favors if he killed the guy. He needed to be alive for questioning later, and Jack knew the perfect person to do it, too. This person always got answers. He headed toward the control booth, hoping he'd be able to dial the Gate without too many snags, and hopefully, he wouldn't be court-martialed over it. The General was a pretty good guy; he'd be understanding. He cared about Daniel just as much as everyone else did, so he could overlook a little misdemeanor when it ultimately went toward helping the base's favorite archeologist.

--

Hammond stared at the four members of SG-7, praying that he'd heard them correctly. "Okay, just to check: You say you went to this planet, but all you found were---?"

"Ankle-biters, sir," Markham assured him. "Lots of 'em. Trust me, no one was more surprised than we were. They were...everywhere."

Hammond blinked, feeling the beginning of a possible plan forming in his mind. "And the adults?"

"There were none,"Stephens clarified. "Trust me, we looked. We got through the Gate, and next thing we know, we're surrounded by little, chattering creatures. If we ever want to wear down the Goa'ould, all we need to do is unleash this planet of kids on them. They'd be begging for mercy within five minutes."

"So, what was the snag?"

All four men looked at him as if they couldn't believe their ears. Finally, Markham found his voice. "Well, sir, the kids really didn't want us to come back. They said that they've had this story for as long as they could remember: Parents would one day come through the Gate for them, and they'd never have to be alone again. When we arrived, it was like we were looking at a wax museum display. They'd all frozen and were staring at us, but the next thing we knew, we were being mobbed."

Stephens spoke up. "The kids thought that the four of us were their parents, and they really didn't want us to leave them again."

Campbell, SG-7's cultural expert, took up the debriefing then. "They thought we wouldn't come back, so whenever we tried to approach the Gate, they'd surround us again and edge us away from it. We were kept at a run with bandaging scraped knees, giving hugs, telling stories...."

Calder grinned. "And all of the kids really liked MREs when we fixed supper. As soon as their little bellies were full they were happy enough to settle down and stargaze with Markham and Campbell while Stephens and I made a call home. Then, once they were asleep, we came back."

"I don't want to think about what those kids are going to go through when they wake up and realize that all of you are gone," Hammond said, shaking his head with a slight smile. All four men were bachelors and only Campbell had even a remote experience with kids. It would have been vastly amusing to watch them interact with those kids. It would have been like Three Men and a Baby times ten!

"Don't give us nightmares, sir," Markham pleaded.

"Well, what we need to do now is find some way to help those kids, and to find out if they're really orphans. If they are, we'll bring them here and arrange families for them," Hammond stated.

"Sir, where are we going to find that many families with the right kind of security clearance?" Campbell wondered.

"Oh, I can think of a place. Dismissed."