Arthur and Tami stared into eachothers eyes breathing hard. Sweat poured down their faces. Cold chill radiating from their bones. The hot summer wind blowing in their hair. Just to their right was the ridge and just below it was Davey, Micah, and Dutch riding out to meet Colm. Arthur's face twisted. Hand flashing down to his knife at a surprising speed. The man behind him only let out a surprised gasp as the blade slit between his ribs effortlessly. Arthur's hand twisted and pulled. The rushing sounds of pouring liquid came over them. A second man ran a hand down for his gun.
Tami felt something touch her mind briefly. Her muscles coiled in response. A breath came into her lungs and left easily. Fear and confusion silenced as a deep knowledge trickled forward from within. Her fingers wrapped around the old dull knife in her belt. No guns, it would only serve to make those below even more jumpy. Arthur's hand came across the second mans throat almost effortlessly. As if it were paper and not human flesh. Tami narrowed her eyes to the two men running from the brush holding their guns into the air. Their eyes trained on the clear threat to their lives.
She slipped a few steps back to grow her distance, "Turn around nice an slow." Arthur stopped and held his hands into the air, "Drop that knife... now!" Tami summed the men up. One had coiled brown hair and the other had fiery red hair. They both looked the same height and weight. She couldn't tell who was stronger from the angle she was at. Arthur turned to look at the men not looking towards her at all.
"Gonna kill me?" He asked sharply. Tami took a few steps forward while he spoke. Using his words to filter out the noise of her boots. Body curled into a crouch.
"We're just gonna hurt you. Can't kill you, not yet." Tami used all of the strength in her legs to jump onto the brown haired man's back. One hand coiled around his mouth while the other brought the blade to his throat. She pulled her arm as strongly as the could. The knife bit and tore, but her cut was much less graceful than Arthur's had been.
Arthur took the moment of confusion to roll for his knife and chuck it directly between the red haired mans eyes. Tami felt the gravel bite into her arm and side. The man under her grabbing for his throat. Voice turned into a garbled mess. The flap of skin she had opened wavered open and close while blood escaped at a dizzying pace. The liquid felt like hot thick water as it bubbled over her hand. It took a moment to separate herself from the man. He reached for her dragging blood in the black locks of her hair. His fingers coiled around them pulling her in close. She started to stab at him blindly to make him let go. He wheezed moving his hands in an attempt to defend himself.
She watched him in shock. Even as Arthur washed her hands with water she just watched. It was different to see someone die in real life. His eyes searched around in fear. Hands clutching at anything to help.
"What the hell was that?" Arthur ran his hands over his body walking back and forth. His fingers only grazed skin. No bullet holes to be found. Not even a single scratch.
Tami's hands shook while she too ran her hands over her body. Her hand pulled away to pull up the pant over her left leg. The skin was flawless and ankle bent properly without pain, "Arthur?" She asked softly, "Are we awake? What just happened?" Her body shook as tears started to form. She reached out to him.
"I could ask you the same thing." He sounded confused still. Head shaking as he tried to figure out what was up and down. Blood started to trickle out of his nose. He wiped it passively turning to see her reaching for him. His long stride broke the gap easily. His boot kicked the shotgun on the ground away before pulling her close to an embrace. Hands pulling at her back and head to grab her in an almost possessive manner, "I believe you. Alright?"
"Arthur, I..." Her hands gripped the back of his vest and shook heavily, "I could feel them on me... in me."
"I saw it. Shit!" His yell made her jump slightly, "We need to get. There's probably more of 'em lurkin' 'round." He pulled away to see her nose trickling blood as his was. His hand reached up to wipe it away only for a new stream to take the place of the one he wiped away before. Eyes searched one another. If someone were to walk into what was happening they would be severely confused.
"Arthur?" Tami gently pushed his chest back, "We need to go." Her eyes slid down to where Dutch and Colm were still talking seemingly undisturbed. Her hand moved to cup his face, "You look better without a bullet to the face." She knelt and took Arthur's gun from the ground. The thing felt heavier than before.
"Modesty suits you." He quipped lightly. His jaw set harshly as the reality of what he had just said sunk in. Her lips pulled to make a harsh line. Their boots matched in stride on the gravel. Balefire and Arthur's horse nibbled at the grass as if nothing had happened at all.
"Well, fuck you then. You might need a bullet to the head, asshole." Tami hugged her shoulders tightly and turned to look back at the dead bodies. The reality of killing not one but two people sinking in. Even if the first one hadn't truly happened it stuck in her mind like glue. The feeling of human flesh and bone breaking under her own hands. She shook the image out of her mind. Kicking her leg over her horse with ease.
Arthur groaned grabbing the reigns of his horse. His leg jumped over easily setting back into the saddle, "We need to go."
Rhodes was very active during the noon hours of the day. More active than Tami had ever seen it before. People talking amongst themselves. Only stopping to give her the strange looks she had grown accustomed to because of the way she dressed. Carriages and wagons pulled in and out of businesses while their drivers talked in the middle of the road like idiots. Holding up traffic and forcing horseback riders to pull into the walking paths. A butcher yelled out the special for the day. Possibly a meat that was growing rotten. Young children scrambled to catch the bugs that jumped from flower to flower. One singular boy stood on the corner of a street holding a paper into the air yelling about the days news.
It was almost too much. Going from the darkness of their minds, covered in pain and blood to here. They would still be here living their lives just fine. World still turning in circles. Unknowing or uncaring to the suffering that would have gone on just miles away from them. Tami looked down to her hands. Someone somewhere is just as afraid and hurt as they were. Maybe lucky enough to get away, but most likely suffering some form of torture. It made her sick to think that they would just be smiling and laughing away while she would be forced to lay on the ground enduring such pain. Her fingers idly pulled across her throat. A woman would still be talking and laughing with her husband while Tami would lay with hands around her throat, crushing the life out of her. And no one would have even stopped to care. Life would go on without her. She pulled the reins on her horse hard, pulling off into the grass just outside of Rhodes. Arthur turned his head to her and paused his riding as well.
"We're here because?" She didn't meet his eyes. Anguish rose in her soul. Everything was just too real. The people talking and walking about. Conducting business as if nothing outside was bothering them. Tami tried to see the edges of the screen she knew was in front of her face, but it never appeared. Green grass and blue sky still hung in her peripheral vision. A fingernail drug against the back of her hand. Not hard enough to draw blood, but hard enough to cause her pain. The tipped edge was sharp and real though she knew in the deepest parts of herself it wasn't.
"I really need a drink after that, maybe a bath too." Arthur eyed her hands. He reached to push his hair back under his hat, secretly running a thumb over where his scalp should have been split open. Hand only dropping to rub his shoulder just to make sure it was whole as well. There was no blood or wound, only the firm brown leather vest he wore on top of a wrinkled but otherwise pristine white shirt.
"I didn't know you knew what soap was." Her lips quirked up words just a little. He let out a snort and pulled his head back.
"Bein' 'round all the shit you kick up, I have to." He picked up his reigns and guided his horse into town. Past the stalls and deeper into the busy town.
"Patting your face once a week with a wet rag isn't a bath, Arthur." She quipped kicking Balefire to follow close behind. "The tent always smells like rotten feet and sweaty ballsack."
"Do you have any shame? At all?" He turned for a second to give her a look of pure revolt. Her lips twisted into a mirthy smirk.
"Not really." Tami shrugged pulling on a strand of loose black hair, "Are we really going back to the bar that you caused a massive riot in?"
"Most of 'em were already too drunk to remember me. An you were a lady." His fingers moved to tip his hat back just a little to see the saloon come into view.
"I believe you used the word presentable." She shot a toothy grin to his back and watched his shoulders roll in his silent laugh, "But seriously, does this place of low morality even have baths?"
"No. They do have food." Arthur looked to where she clenched at her grumbling belly.
"Yeah, I could go for something to eat." She met his eyes with a half smile. Inside of her a hot storm of emotions still raged.
Tami was halfway through her first bottle when the food arrived. She was surprised at the quality of such a place. Two men were arm wrestling at the bar and another four were playing cards to the side. A few windows were boarded up and there was holes in the wood, but nothing much else to suggest of what happened before. Arthur sat opposite of her nursing his second bottle. Cigarette sitting between his fingers as he drank. Quiet music flowed from the man sitting on the piano. A few women cluttered the stairs dressed in bright colors with painted faces. Their beauty wasn't hidden under the heavy makeup, simply brought out. Tami eyed them and took in the strange concept that were considered beautiful for this time. The heavy blush coupled with the shimmery eyeshadow.
The plate of pork was set at her side. The man who brought it out said little more than 'enjoy', but years of habit had Tami holding a few dollars out to him. He looked shocked at the appearance of the money while Arthur simply raised his eyebrows at the gesture. Tami looked between them and felt a bit self conscious, "Oh, can you not accept tips here?" She asked lowly. The man took it gingerly and shrugged.
"She's from the north. Got funny ways." Arthur spoke smoothly. He popped the cherry out of his cigarette into the ashtray before setting it on the table.
"Thank you Miss." His confusion turned into a smile, "If you need anthin' else, just call."
"Tipping isn't really that foreign is it?" Tami asked softly. She grabbed the napkin from the table and set it in her lap. Arthur moved to grab his own fork and knife.
"Not really." He sniffed before descending into his meal, "Just strange seein' a woman do it 'round here." Tami felt a wave of shame overcome her. Helplessness drove into her heart like an ice cold sword. Had hands pushed the plate away from her. The need to eat leaving her fully. Her hands trembled as eyes scoured the room. Her muscles tensed under the eyes she found on her. Even the simple glances made her hair stand on edge, "You okay?" Arthur asked in a low tone.
"I wanna go home." She whispered lowly. Brave face disolving into the shame and fear she felt inside of her.
"I already knew that." He replied setting his fork back into his meal.
"I mean camp. Somewhere I at least feel somewhat safe." She wanted to curl into herself. The smoky dark atmosphere of the saloon didn't help to stop her nerves.
"Can it wait?" Arthur asked with a slight sigh.
"There are a lot of men here, Arthur. And as much as I would love to say I feel safe with you... I just don't. Not right now." Her fingers brushed her hair behind her ears.
"You wanna talk 'bout it?" He offered more out of duty than anything. She lifted her chin to take his face in. A flash of his face twisted in pain came over her. Blood dripping down his fingers as he hung. The pain in her naked body as she was tied to a chair. The helpless feeling of being tied to the ground. Pain of being... She closed her eyes and looked away.
"No." She kept looking over her shoulder. Making sure there wasn't anyone behind her, "I want to leave."
"I'm just sayin' I've never seen him spend so much time with anyone." Mary Beth looked dreamy in the way she spoke. Beautiful almond shaped olive colored eyes perched on her puffy yet cute pink cheeks. Heart shaped lips were poised in a soft sigh.
"And I'm just sayin' we are being forced with one another on Dutch's orders. 'sides he's mostly a prick with dry humor nothin' else to it." Tami worked on pushing the clothes through the soapy water and up the washboard. It was difficult and made her miss modern elements.
"You look at him in a way that says much more than that." Tilly eyed Tami slightly. Mary Beth continued to fold the clothing pulled from the line. She sat across from the other two women with a slight smirk on her lips.
"A man said it's plain to see." Tami pulled the soapy clothing and shoved it into the rinsing bin in front of Tilly. The dark skinned woman started to squeeze the soap out of the shirt in her hands before repeating the process of soaking it and pulling it against a washing board. Her rich brown eyes admired Tami for a minute. Full lips tugged slightly into a quiet smile.
"Nevermind that. What do you feel?" Mary Beth pressed with glowing eyes.
Arthur and her had suffered the same fate. An evil knowledge that was kept between them. Suffering coupled with the inability to tell anyone else. Tami had grown more into herself. It wasn't until Tilly offered to keep her company that she had left the tent in days. John was off doing more and more jobs while Arthur kept away for days at a time now. She had grown used to sitting alone in her tent for days. It was suffocating to be alone with her thoughts. Thoughts ran through her head over and over. Wishing she did something more to free herself. If only she had fought harder. Guilt and shame seemed to take pride in crushing her. She wanted to reach out for help. Talk to someone and ask for comfort, but who would comfort her when it came to that? Who could she truly trust with something deeper than a paper cut. Not Mateo, not anymore.
Mateo had found himself an in with the gang in his own way. Much to Tami's dismay he started to hang around Micah and Davey more and more. She could see a glint in his eyes. An enjoyment of the lawless land and lack of consequences he seemed to enjoy. Providing an endless world full of possibilities seemed to only push him into a darker path that she hadn't even thought of taking. The few times she tried to talk about how the ghosts of the men she murdered haunted her he just pressed it off. Talking about how freeing it was to slay the bad guys. To rob from the rich and give to the poor like some fucked up Robin Hood complex.
John did do his best to check on her every time he could. The few times he was left at camp with a few moments he would try to balance time with her, Abigail, and Jack. Tami took the kindness to heart, but also knew Abigail was growing weary of sharing the already sparse time she had with her own husband. And Jack needed his father. It hurt to tell him to leave her in peace, but it was the best for all involved.
Arthur was a separate story all together. He kept away more out of want than need. She could feel why. It wasn't like Tami was actively seeking him out either. The flashes of her nightmare come true would come in the form of nightmares. The dripping of blood and strong smell of copper. Pain and white mixed with legs staining the wood she sat on. Her comfort when waking would be short lived. She could hear his voice comforting her. Feel his hands on her, see his eyes full of compassion only to wake and remember how he reacted once it was over. Sure he held her once, but after he grew cold and distant. The pain of it forcing something deep down inside of her to come forward. The rotten understanding that she was falling in love with him to the point his lack of attention truly hurt her.
Tami turned her head to admire Arthur from a distance. He was still weak even after a few days recuperating. She could feel her own fatigue pushing her down as well. The way he had yelled after her. Calling attention to himself. The feelings she had been locking away bloomed forward, "I think..." She bowed her head and closed her eyes. He wasn't just a simple code. Not here. The world was growing into something much more than just a game. Script be damned it felt as real as anything. Arthur was just as real as her. Her knowledge of reality had finally been ground into fine dust. Nothing left. When it was all said and done he would die, and it choked her up to know that. Every second waiting for his coughing to start in a slow foreshadowing of what was to come. She had to get home, she knew that much, but that didn't mean everything around her wasn't real, not anymore. The pain of knowing that he would be gone started to come in slow waves. Freed from the confines of the dark pit it had been hidden into. It only grew stronger once the names started rolling forward. Sean, Hosea, Molly, and Susan all dead or living on borrowed time. People she couldn't save, unless she wanted to risk her own life in turn. Even still they would be an empty shell as Davey was.
"I think I love him." She lifted her hand to push the tear rolling down her cheek away, "Probably some form of sick infatuation. You know the big strong guy comes in and almost murders you twice and all of a sudden you love him." Tami winced slightly at the rawness her fingers started to feel. An unnatural state of work causing them to rub against the metal cleaning rack over and over after being softened by the water, "But he and I can't work."
"Why's that?" Mary Beth finished folding the last of the dry clothing. Tilly set the now rinsed shirt into an open basket watching Tami intently. The women leaned forward giving Tami their full attention.
"We're from two different worlds. Whatever we think we feel is being forced onto us in an attempt to..." Tami shook her head slightly, "I don't know. But whatever it is, it just can't." She moved a pair of black pants into Tilly's water.
Tilly started to work away at the pants in a similar fashion as before. Tami felt herself start to shake as the memories tried to force themselves back into her skull. Her heart beating at a rapid pace. Breathing became erratic.
"Hey now, everything alright?" Mary Beth encouraged lightly. Her soft touch and kindness not lost. Tami searched the other woman's eyes.
"They were gonna shoot me. They were gonna kill me. Arthur stepped in. He could have attempted to escape, but he didn't. I could hear him yellin' long after they gagged him while they..." Tami shut her eyes and turned her head, "How can someone hate me so much, but keep me alive as he had." She hissed through the tears that threatened to spill.
"Maybe he doesn't. He gets a look about him when you're around. He's always the joking sort, but always puts on a bigger show when you're around to watch." Tilly's soft eyes grazed along Tami. Confusion was met when she turned to meet Mary Beth's eyes.
"He really listens to you when you talk." Mary Beth added. She just supposed something happened that wasn't shared with the gang. A few adventures did go unreported a few times, but they would return with a bruise at least. Tami and Arthur had arrived back shaken but no worse for wear. It wasn't unnoticed that she was craving solitary, only coming out when Dutch requested it. Arthur on the other hand was returning into his normal routine of leaving camp for long hours instead of staying near. Something happened that was a sure thing, but neither of them had spoken about it.
"He listens to everyone." Tami dismissed easily, "Hell, I'm such a 'magical being' everyone listens to me. Not sure if they hear it, but they listen." Tami put air quotes around 'mystic being' with her fingers.
"No, I mean he listens to you. Tries to make it unnoticeable, but he watches you too." Fingers moved to grab her hand. Tilly ran a soft finger across the rawness in Tami's.
"I think he's the only fella here that really tries to understand you." Mary Beth added with a slight laugh, "You say some truly strange things."
"Are you sure you aren't just trying to make this a love story, because it feels like you are." The wind started to pick up around them. Black clouds boomed in the distance while the promise of rain wafted its sweet perfume into the air.
"Maybe I am. Maybe I'm not." Mary Beth waved to someone out of Tami's line of sight, "But I won't tell a soul." Tilly nodded in silent agreement. Tami smiled at both of them tightly. No joy in the way her lips curled.
"Tell 'em what?" Mateo's voice boomed from behind Tami making her jump. Eyes dilated while fear raced through her for a few seconds. Her body tensed. His hands tapped her shoulders in a familiarity. Thumb fingers rotating over the muscles of her back, "C'mon T-dog I want to know."
Tami let out a low bark of a laugh at the way he spoke. She took a little comfort in it. His soft spanish accent was nothing compared to anyone around them, but his words mirrored her own. He absolutely understood her references and slang. It was a small gesture that meant a lot, even if his soul was turning dark, "You're insufferable sometimes." She pushed his hands from her shoulders.
"Yeah, I know. C'mon I got you something sweet and you're gonna like it." Mateo spoke in almost a sing song way.
"Oh, Sweets? Share with everyone!" Mary Beth smiled excitedly.
"No he doesn't mean sweet as in candy. He means it's gonna be nice or cool." Tami explained.
"So... cold?" Tilly asked with a turn of her head.
"No like awesome!" Mateo held an energy that was always positive. It spread easily. The women laughed as he held his fists into the air, "But for real, come on." He tugged on her shoulder excitedly.
"Hey, can't you see I'm doing work here. It can wait." Tami shot him a slight look of mirth filled annoyance.
"There's not much left. I'll take it on. Go." Mary Beth stood from her empty basket and made a waving motion with her hands. Tami moved to protest, but felt Mateo drag her from behind. His hand clasped hers and helped her up.
"Run while you can." Mateo laughed pulling her behind him. She wondered just how old he was back where they were from. He was so proper while in a suit. She supposed ti was because he was at work. Back home she was pushing her late twenties. Always lagging behind others in her ways. Not truly contributing as a whole, but staying alive well enough. Her job always helped her reach out to people in help. It was something she loved to do. Spending time with mateo outside of this place he always seemed older than her, but now it seemed he was on the same ball field as her. His confidence showing the two different paths of success in their real lives despite their ages. Tami tilted her head.
"How old are you... out there." She pulled her chin towards the sky. Mateo turned around dropping her hand.
"You've never asked me before, what's the special occasion?" Mateo nodded for her to keep following him. The bright grey horse he had was a strong breed. She couldn't quite remember the name of it, but it suited him. The horse was wild and rambunxious. Very similar to Duke in the way it wouldn't let another person ride it. Balefire had always been a gentle soul, he enjoyed being taken around and ridden by Kieran every so often. It seemed they matched the owners personalities well. The tiny mare she had bought was just set aside to pull carriages now. Mary Beth had taken to call her Sunflower and paid more attention to the mare than even Kieran did.
"You're different in here. Just curious I guess." Tami smiled to Kieran as they passed the man. He sat in a slightly slumped position fiddling with a saddle. He gave her a cautious smile, but nothing more, "Not running around in a fancy suit, or forced uniform."
"To be fair, you aren't wearing a flimsy white two piece. That I could totally see through by the way." Meteo turned to see her face faltering, "Just kidding, come on."
"Right." Tami breathed in reply. Her steps feeling sluggish, "Could you really? Be honest."
"Hey it was just a joke, no need to be weird about it." Mateo pulled a face. He eyed the way her lips scrunched into a thin line, "I didn't mean to bother you. Look I was only joking. Here take a look at this. I remember seeing you wear one every so often back in the facility."
"God, just the word facility is like a head rush here. You ever stop and just listen to them." Tami laughed softly holding the tissue he handed her. It was light as if nothing was left within it.
"Oh hey you over there. You got my grits ready? Just gonna head out to the saloon and..." Mateo held his hands at a funny angle, "You lookin' at me feller? Well I don't know partner you look somethin' suspicious." Tami choked back a laugh and shook her head, "Ain't you got somewhere to be lady?"
"Stop it, man." Her laugh reached a higher pitch.
"Go on, open it. For real, you'll like it." Mateo gave a toothy grin. Anticipation raced across his features.
"Oh..." Tami breathed opening the tissue to show a silver necklace. A few gems were placed in silver charms hanging from it. Her fingers ran across the red and blue gems slowly.
"You like it, I remember... ugh." He almost fell back. Her arms wrapped around his shoulders making him chuckle. He patted her back in response, "Glad you like it."
"I love it." Tami bit her lower lip pulling back, "Can you put it on?" She asked offering the small silver chain to him. He took it gingerly and twirled a finger to make her turn around. She lifted the heavy messy bun off of her neck to allow him a better view.
His fingers brushed the nape of her neck while clipping it around throat. A breeze of cold wavered into her veins. The ghost of his memories, beating as if he were alive. Faint yet there. She couldn't quite crack into them. Like he was becoming a living thing slowly. Her eyes slowly turned to face him.
"Do you get enjoyment from food?" She asked softly.
"It's getting better. I guess their coding taste buds into the game now." He laughed, "They should. It tasted like cardboard half the time."
"Do you get hungry now? How about the bathroom, do you have to go now?" She asked. Her head whipped around looking to see if anyone was watching them.
"I didn't think about it like that, but yeah. What's going on?" He asked. His lips turned into a grimace. Hands started to shake as he put two and two together.
"You're the one working for them." She hissed lowly.
"I'm not a programmer, just a guide. I was just here for you. We were hired months before you guys were. I had a small stint in psychology. They wanted that so we could connect to the contestants. Get a read on how your head was doing, but that was it." Mateo shook his head and ran a hand down his face, "It's a little easy to start predicting the game now. It's becoming real in ways. People are enjoying things more. I smoked out there, but never had cravings in here before. It's starting slowly like an itch. When I smell it I get the need for one for just a second. I'm wanting sex more and more now."
"That's a little much." Tami recoiled a little.
"It's true. I just thought they were programming it outside. They still talk to me now and then." He admitted.
"The game talks to me. Like it's real now and then. It showed me a place." She shook her head, "It's hard for me. I'm beginning to see them as real people. I killed two of them." Her hands shook.
"We've been over this. They're just codes. They respawn and reset once the game is over. You need to stop changing things." He hissed lowly, "Arthur should be in a cot recuperating right now, not riding off doing simple jobs. You've damaged the script with that one. Davey is alive as well. Do you understand the repercussions of what you've done." He grabbed her arm and twisted it harshly, "These are gang members, their not good people. They kill, lie, and steal from others. They suffer while you prance around."
"Prance around? I saw what happened. I was assaulted, Mateo. I was raped by those O'Driscoll's and I felt every bit of it. I still do. Just their hands all over me and..." She held in the tears opting for anger instead of sadness, "And look whos talking about 'suffering'. I thought they were just codes."
"You're jeopardizing us, don't you get that? Our ability to go home just because you're losing yourself here. You're changing in a way that's not true. You think all of this precious character development and relationships are gonna matter in the real world? They are just characters in a game. It's not real. What you experienced didn't even happen. First off you weren't supposed to be there, and secondly it wasn't real." He hissed.
"It felt real to me!" She exploded in her anger. Someone started walking towards them in the grass, "Just go, fuck your whores. Kill who you please I don't care."
"It was your fault you know. If you weren't there it wouldn't happen but you won't let well enough alone." He pushed her hard into whoever was behind her. The hands wrapped around her shoulders.
"I think it's time you move on." Mateo glared up at John.
"Take this with you. I don't need your stolen shit." Tami pulled at the necklace hard. It broke into fragments that she threw at Mateo. His face twisted into a scowl.
"You..." Mateo took a step forward, "Need to remember I have the power out there and I will..."
"Are you deaf?" John pushed Mateo forward using his body to block Tami behind him. Mateo shook his head.
"Hide behind the codes, Tami. If you didn't fuck everything up you wouldn't have to." Mateo took a step back as John put his hand to his gun.
"I ain't tellin' you again." John hossed lowly. Tami gripped his arm softly. It was strange to feel the rage coming off of him. Like a fire warming her. Unlike Arthur, John's emotions kept besides hers not mixing, but standing alone to make itself known within her.
"Enjoy your brother." Mateo shook his head, "Just see reason."
Tami held John's arm still keeping the gun in its holster. She stepped out from behind him and shook her head, "Just go." Mateo rolled his eyes and threw his arms up in exasperation. He jumped onto his horse a little clumsily and rode off leaving John and Tami in the wake of dust in the air.
"What was that about?" John asked bending to retrieve the broken necklace from the ground.
"Nothing important. Weren't you on some sort of scouting job?" She asked watching him attempt to mend the broken silver.
"Was huntin' our meat stores were low. You sure you don't wanna talk. You been actin' strange lately. More than normal." John furrowed his brows, "Why is he givin' you this anyway."
"I guess we were friends. Besides I'm always weird according to you guys." She took the necklace from him and shoved it into her pocket.
"Friends don't just give a woman jewelry." John insinuated raising his brows.
"Seriously." She nudged his knee with her foot, "We didn't have anything romantic like going on."
"Maybe you didn't." He shrugged, "You sure you don't wanna talk?" He paused reaching out to grab her shoulder, "You can talk to me."
"You wouldn't understand." She shrugged his hand away.
"I could try." He nodded towards the dock, "C'mon."
"Do I have a choice?"
"No."
"How do you do that?" Tami asked. John threw another stone into the water watching it skip out five times before sinking.
"Find a flat rock and throw it." He replied looking back into the sand to find another one. She stepped forward and stole one from his fingers throwing it with a splash.
"That wasn't even one." She whined making him chuckle.
"Like this." He procured another rock and held it between his thumb and forefinger. With a flick of his wrist he sent the rock into the air in a vertical arch. It hit the water and bounced three times before sinking. Tami searched for a flat rock and tried it out. Once again it just sunk. She kicked her foot in frustration. John laughed at her show. Tami sat onto the ground with a thump watching the water lick at the bank in small lazy waves.
"When Arthur and I were on that ledge I showed him something." John stopped looking for a rock and diverted his attention to her, "Didn't know I could do it before. It's hard to control. I don't know it's limits or everything it does. I can only do this or that sometimes. It's so damn frustrating. It's so unpredictable." She pulled her knees to her chest resting her chin on them. John sat besides her kicking a leg out. A soft clap of thunder rolled through the sky. Dark clouds moving closer to them. He stayed silent leaning back onto his hands to gaze into the cloudy sky.
"We were captured by the O'Driscolls. Tortured and beaten. Arthur was shot and I was... They took turns using me. Leaving me naked and tied up for Colm." She looked to see John's fists growing white. Sand in his hands spilling out as he clutched it. Jaw starting to set in a dangerous look, "We escaped and made it back to camp. He saved my ass. I would have totally died by myself. The way he held me there on the ground. You tried to take me away and he just held me harder. I just..." She bit her bottom lip, "Then we woke up, like a sick twisted fucking dream. But we still remember it. It was so real. We felt all of it."
"Could you show me?" John asked through clenched teeth.
"Maybe." She shrugged, "But I don't want to see it. I never want to see it again."
He looked at her, face softening. Arms reached out to pull her into an awkward angle. His body radiated warmth, heart beating into her ear reminding her of the life inside of him. Tami reached up to clutch his shirt in her hand, "You're real to me."
"Not gonna ask." He replied. The rain started falling in soft cool drops. Tami closed her eyes against the feeling of it. It had been so long since she felt the rain on her skin. Even back in her tiny apartment she would just sit inside shut out from the world around her. She missed the comforts of her old life. Constant connection to the internet and phone so that limitless knowledge was just a swipe away. It was so foreign on how advanced it seemed now. In the same breath, she felt like she had found her place. It was unstable and rocky most of the time, but here she had people to talk to. A family of sorts that cared what she said. Was interested in who she was. Not the same cookie cutter appearance of social standards here. Just real people with raw emotions. Her resolve to get back was growing weaker. It started to hurt knowing she would have to wake up one day and endure the harsh reality. The reality that this was not what she wanted it to be.
John tapped her shoulder with his fingers in time the rain. He felt her emotions well up and spill out of her one by one. He had grown used to the alien feeling. It wasn't normal by any means, but it had grown constant to him. An overwhelming need to keep her happy was driven with his own selfish need to not feel it drag him down mixed with the duty he felt knowing she was of his own blood. He had thought long and hard about their sudden relationship after Arthur had brought it up. All of a sudden some woman appeared with a godly power, and then it turned out it was his own twin. He tried to find any evidence of her before now, but only had his own memories to back it up. It was confusing at the best of times. He still cared for her. Her personality was warped and off kilter from most around him. A big woman with a bright personality and fight against authority. Similar to Karen yet different in her own way. His chin moved to rest on her head.
"Gonna catch our death." He hummed softly. Tami took comfort in his broken voice. The way it grated against itself that made it his own.
"Just one more minute." Tami sighed. She looked into the sky and felt the rain run down her face, "I'm glad you're here."
"Me too." John whispered. They sat in the rain for a long time. Long enough that they were soaked beyond saving. A cold wind came along with the storm. The cold front bit through the fat drops of water and into their bodies. The two rose from the ground in silence. Stretching from the cramped position they had been sitting in. Before they reached the edge of camp Tami stopped John and left a soft kiss on his cheek. The roughness of his stubble mixed with the softness of her lips. He stood with a gentle smile watching her until she disappeared into Arthur's tent. His confusion washed away in the rain. Memories or not she was his sister, and with that resolve he put his short lived conflict aside.