'I believe he doesn't really like you at the moment, Danchou.' Illumi passed me to go for him, but he didn't move away even a little. At this rate he'd be infected or worse. I don't think I appreciate that. 'It will be easier if we let him lead the way instead of killing him.' The danger didn't diminish, and I sensed the borderline coming closer. By now I have a fairly good knowledge of that,

'This is different from before, isn't it. It's already more focused.'

'I can tell you like it, but-' I had to step in when Illumi reached out and lifted Chrollo by the neck. Since he was still on this side of the line, I surged some nen through him to force him to let go.

This time, Illumi didn't fall to his knees, but he did give room for Chrollo to step away, and he worked hard to keep standing until he'd switched himself back completely. Whatever either of you does, you're not allowed to die by someone else's hands. Illumi should be happy that switching him back was all I forced on him.

'Don't misbehave so much.' I mused when I noticed the surge had taken care of everything, and Illumi's hand raised to hold his head. Well you may not have fallen to your knees this time, but you still don't like the feeling, do you. 'Killua-kun is fine, he's just being detained, don't go berserk just over a hypothetical situation.' I really have not ever seen you this unstable.

'Alright.' He answered calmly, his head still in his hands, having more trouble with gravity than normal. 'Did I do any damage?' I didn't allow you to, no.

'No you didn't.' It was Chrollo who answered. 'But I appreciate the effort you've been making.'

'The effort is not for you.' He lifted his head again with those words, and suppressed the other nen completely in the meantime.

'Fair enough. I'll lead the way then.' Without any second thought, Danchou left through the window, with me and Illumi following close behind. I think we need to find out the trick to this pulling force quick for all our sakes. Having Illumi unstable with his level of obsessiveness is not a pleasant combination.

From there on, Illumi had reactivated the proximity danger of my collar. Considering we were heading towards others from the troupe, I can imagine he would. He doesn't trust me outside the bedroom either way, especially not around this group of people.

There had been little danger though, Danchou was only with a small group today, most of the troupe were scattered leaving him with Phinks and Feitan. Although interesting – I do prefer Danchou on his own. You should all be aware of this already.

I guess any chance either of you get to control my actions is interesting to you, isn't it. I feel so flattered.

'Not that I'm not impressed with this progress, but is there something I could help with now that you're here?' He was walking us to where Phinks was detaining the boys. Of course Kurapika was being kept elsewhere.

'Hisoka will talk with you about that.' I got the question passed on to me from Illumi who seemed less than eager to communicate with anyone but his little brother at this point. I smiled to myself,

'I get this notion that it won't be good for my health if I talk with you about this, Danchou.' He laughed softly, accepting the answer. Of course, I wasn't too eager on giving him information either. The way this power of Illumi's is developing, it's not easy to counter and quite powerful. I think I would have more fun fighting Danchou the way he is now. Too bad I can't get rid of this collar so easily…

'That's quite the device that it can keep you silent, Hisoka.' He threw the tease my way. 'And it wouldn't be able to if you weren't doubting about helping me with this, would it.' He stopped in the hallway before we reached anyone. Seems like he's more than aware of my motivations. It would be nice if the reverse were true as well though. 'I am aware of how fickle you are, that's why I'm keeping Gon.' He turned his head halfway to look at me directly when he told me this. I let out a displeased grunt hearing that. If you're aware of how fickle I am, then by all means, you should be wanting to take one of the necessary items from me now.

Or are you already waiting for the right moment for that? Is that what you're so busy with?

… ….No he's not. He voluntarily left it with me. Oooh~ how I'd love to be able to look inside that mind of yours.

In this short moment of silence, he noticed my interest in this and smiled,

'You have so little faith in me.' I answered with. Chrollo softly laughed before answering, turning back to walk us to our destination.

'There is no-one in this hallway that should have faith in each other, that should be clear.' Well that is a given, yes.

The moment we stopped again was when he'd softly pushed open a door, walking on without further delay. Although I would've liked it more to follow Danchou to witness what was being done to the Kurta and what kind of information would come out of him, I appreciated my life enough not to. Illumi was trigger happy enough as is, the close proximity of Killua does not do that much good.

'Oh it's you again.' I could already hear the annoyance when Phinks noticed my company. I looked down at Killua-kun being all tied up and held down, not looking entirely too pleased by his new company. His eyes opened wide when Illumi stopped in front of him. Gon stayed remarkably calm this time,

'Don't worry, we haven't done anything to him.' He pulled him forcefully back down when he'd wanted to stand up, and got up from the ground himself.

'That was a smart move.' I turned my eyes back to him. He was surprisingly quiet being so near his obsession.

'Not a question of a smart move, question of orders.'

'So, what're you going to do with him now?'

'None of your business.' I noticed a lack in reaction from Illumi's side to that,

'I think he'll be a bit too resistant to torture.'

'He will be.' This he did decide to react to. 'I was the one to train him in this, he won't say a word.' There was a small amount of pride when he said this, just before he lifted his hand to his little brother's head.

Although he cringed, Killua didn't retreat when Illumi patted his head.

Phinks himself didn't look entirely too comfortable under any of this either. That was far from interesting though. Still I listened to the brothers' "conversation".

'They didn't do anything to you?'

'…This coming from you?' I smiled hearing how much trouble it cost him to say those words, only to be ignored,

'I suggest to stay out of the Troupe's way if you want to survive.' Well now, I do believe the boy's bloodlust would be more impressive if it wasn't aimed at Illumi. All that insecurity, such a shame. This was starting to become boring, though.

'Didn't know they'd become your servants.' Illumi retreated his hand, bending over and closing his face in a bit more.

'They haven't.'

'…Then why the hell are they here.' He bit through his teeth. This was strange, they weren't aware of Kurapika's… issues, with the Troupe? I crossed my arms, looking down at the boy. My attention was called back a little.

'You didn't know Kurapika was being hunted by the Troupe?'

'He is?'

'Shut up, Gon.' My my, these boys know nothing of what their friend is doing, but still threw themselves into it. How very… loyal of them.

'But Killua, you said that Kurapika was just trying to get closer to Illumi for some reason?' I raised a hand to my mouth to stop a laugh,

'Goddamnit Gon…' Killua hung his head, but Illumi didn't let him be,

'Get closer to me?'

'He said that after we asked what he was doing.' He mumbled back, realizing it was a bad idea to lie at this point.

'So you did all this to lure me out?'

'…Yes.' He sounded defeated. Apparently they were planning to let us follow them and lure us into some kind of trap further on, then. Considering how little Kurapika told them though, I doubt we can trust anything they think is the truth.

Would Danchou let us near the blonde, though…

'You will stay away from the Troupe from now on, understood?' Gon started struggling again when Illumi lifted Killua's face forcefully. In Phinks' grip though, there was nowhere to go for either of them. 'And I expect you to do the mission like agreed.' He narrowed his eyes up at Illumi before silently conceding. At that point, Illumi smiled down at him, and stood back up straight again.

'We're going, Hisoka.'

'That's it?' I was a bit surprised that this was enough to satisfy his current needs.

'Kil is fine, we're going back.' I kept a soft laugh to myself as he walked to turn the corner out of the small room again. I followed before the proximity danger would activate, lazily raising a hand in goodbye to the pair still having to wait in the room.

I think this is going to be our last outing for a while though.

However, now that I've decided on fighting Danchou before all this is over, I will have to find new ways to isolate him again, and I can tell that is not going to be done so easily anymore – they're constantly anticipating I do this now…

I will save this little gem for when I'm done with Illumi~

This has not been an effortless night.

I'd lost control too easily today. After this is over, I'm going to stay at the mansion until full control is back and keep myself isolated from outside information – I will delegate my existing tasks.

'We're not continuing immediately? I surely thought that after realizing what's happening to you, you would feel eager.' Hisoka entered my room without warning or permission, but kept his distance for now. We'd returned an hour earlier at the break of day, and I've had to answer to grandfather still overlooking my activities. I was surprised I hadn't been put on punishment training. Then again, at this point it is more important to focus my efforts on getting this nen under control. In controlled environments there's progress; in other environments it now has more freedom than before.

So until I have full control, I am not leaving the premises again.

'We need focus for that training to be effective.'

'You don't have that right now?' His tone sounded too serious for him,

'That should be obvious.'

'Want me to help you focus then?' I stood up from the bed when even that had sounded serious and not playful.

I think he made his decision on whether he's going to allow Chrollo this power.

'No matter what happened, we both haven't slept.' I took slow steps towards him.

'That shouldn't matter with you, should it.'

'You know how much focus this training requires. If I'm not calm doing this, it will generate less progress.' When I stopped inches away from him, he still didn't get a playful look in his eyes. Either he was hiding it better than normally, he was finally serious, or his focus is currently somewhere else for the first time.

'… Chrollo knows you're going to betray him again.' A faint smile appeared on his lips. 'So he also knows you're going to press to fight before you give him the second item. Plus that he's allowed you to keep it knowing the situation might happen. All of this suggesting he wasn't interested in getting this nen in the first place – supported as well by him not laying any importance in securing the other needed item. Which leaves few other options on why he's doing this.' Considering the look in his eyes focused even more, I was on the right track, 'He either wants to just use me, he's delaying you as well – which would be strange considering he gave you a time limit – or he wants both of us out of the way until the appointed date after which he'll use both of us. Either way, your fight with him is not going to happen.' Although that usually taunted him, this time he remained stoic under it, keeping his arms crossed. 'Or of course the other option, which is that you two are keeping a secret and I'm going to be the one betrayed.'

'You know I would never do that.' The corners of his lips raised a little exclaiming this. A bit of pleasure returned, but I know he wouldn't. He's not going to risk retribution.

'Which leaves Chrollo's motivations that are bothering you, right?' I inclined my head, waiting until he slightly nodded in confirmation. It took him a small while to admit something was bothering him, 'Then you want this to progress more quickly so you can use me to capture and isolate him.'

'Perhaps.' I blinked at him. This is not a good state of mind for my training, his focus is intense, but not on the right goal. 'Mah, if it will be better to start it later, I'll be training by myself in the meantime then.' He gave me a couple of seconds to calculate the possibilities before he'd walk away. Because in the end, the hours lost to sleep would be greater than reaching 100% of the wanted results if we started now. 'Looks like you decided to join after all, didn't you.' How he noticed this was beyond me, and I stepped away when he inclined his head to kiss me.

'Let's go then.'

'We seem to have run into a snag.'

'We have.' After five hours of continuous training, no progress seemed to happen. I've hit a time limit once again, and I'm unable to pass it. It's not my intention to extend the time limit, but with working on the pulling force, it had extended on its own. That has stopped now, and we've been in the same situation for two of these five hours. We should've taken a break earlier.

Because no matter what I tried, I wasn't able to bypass the pulling force or get a good hold on it in the first place. By being able to extend the time I'm able to train my body to get used to the density to some degree – keeping the aura to myself - but that's where progress stops. Because I can't get rid of that pulling force, there's a severe limit on this ability. I'm constantly working on maintaining control instead of using its power. It really is a shame, I'm starting to appreciate it now that there's the possibility of control. If I develop it a bit further I can even reject nen, or pull the nen in people towards me without absorbing it. I wouldn't even need the needles anymore to manipulate.

On top of all this, now that Hisoka has made his decision concerning Chrollo, he's become more efficient as well – less playing around.

All these beneficial factors, but they're all counting on the fact I'll be able to break loose.

I sighed realizing this.

'Hmph.' I looked back up at Hisoka when I heard the huff.

'Do you have an idea?' His lips turned up when answering.

'You sound so eager by now. I remember when you hated even the notion of losing control.' That was before we got this close. I raised my voice,

'Do you or don't you?'

'I do.' I inclined my head, surprised to hear he might actually have an answer. It piqued my interest.

'You know what the pulling force is?' He lifted his finger, pushing away from the wall, taking slow, casual steps my way. He was pleased with himself again. Well, if it benefits me, I don't care if he is or isn't. He's been helping me better than normal today either way,

'It's so clear that we overlooked it completely.' He still liked to talk around it though. I sighed my answer hearing his old mood rearing its head again at this point,

'Just tell me, Hisoka.'

'You can switch this nen on and off by giving away control, right?'

'I let go in order to gain control again afterwards, yes.' So to some extent I do give away control.

'What this nen wants most is gain complete control, right?'

'When I give that, I turn into that berserk monster, and that's not the goal here.' He shook his head before lowering his hand to his hip and stopping in front of me. I cocked my head in question. Where was he going with this?

'What if the nen and the pulling force are two separate entities?' Ah,

'What do you mean?'

'That giving away control merely activates the other nen and that the pulling force is a counter, the safety your family built in, that they're not one and the same.' I raised my head again. Of course, the berserk side forces me to let the nen flow out, it is the defense they implanted.

'That is a good point.' He smiled even more pleased to himself when I said that.

'So instead of giving away control I should find another way to switch the nen?'

'Well, you know the feeling of the other nen now, don't you?' He stepped back when he noticed I was searching myself for this feeling. If the pulling force and nen are indeed different entities, then I should be able to find a place where only one of the two is able to exist.

Hisoka took another step back when my own aura started to flow more than normally to the point where my hair started to lift as well.

What was that feeling again.

Instead of giving away control, I need to… embrace that other nen, right? Because that is supposed to be same as my own, only more dense. I need to order it to switch, keeping in complete control. This is an amount of control I haven't had to exude for a long time.

Both by the feeling inside of me and the look in Hisoka's face I noticed I was searching in the right direction though. I closed my eyes and relaxed my body looking for the switch in the recesses of my nen. I could tell Hisoka was getting curious even though he wasn't saying anything, and I had to ask him to conceal himself for my focus.

Quiet, I need complete quiet.

He grumbled being told to do this, but complied. He's not stupid, he can tell we're close to something.

Where is the switch…

It took a couple of minutes.

It took a couple of minutes before I realized that there wasn't just one switch. The one switch I'd used before was the factor of giving away control – the factor that activated the pulling force as well. I needed to stop searching for a switch and focus on the feeling of the nen actually switch-

I opened my eyes again when I felt a bone creak in an attempt to succeed in my search, but didn't stop. It's more violent this way, isn't it. The pulling force was the actual anomaly planted inside of me to subdue this full force as well..?

That would make sense. Controlling something my body can't handle puts more stress on it than to just let it all mindlessly flow out, doesn't it.

But the pulling force hasn't been declining, has it?

Then again, I more easily fall into that other nen than I have before. That means the pulling force is constantly keeping watch, but only activates when the other nen activates.

So instead of switching to the other nen, I should switch the pulling force off first.

But that hasn't worked from the start, has it.

I stopped exuding aura at that point, and subdued it all. I stopped Hisoka from speaking up with a small hand gesture, telling him I was still working on it.

The pulling force is a dormant factor inside of me, I just need it to stay dormant. I need to fool it into thinking everything is still normal. How do I do that?

'How about you try to keep it all inside of you this time instead of allowing it to ooze out.' It seemed that Hisoka had had the same line of thought. I returned his attention when he offered this solution. 'If you accept all of it – if it doesn't need to flow out – that should trick it enough, don't you think.' I will most probably break a couple of bones doing that though. But it was worth a try. I can reset those bones at a later time. By now it was a reasonable risk.

I gave him a slight nod that I accepted his words, activating my aura again. This meant flipping the switch like I always did, but instead of trying to get a grip on the pulling force, focusing on keeping all of the nen in and calming it down enough for it not to break my body.

It took no effort at all before I felt it switching and flowing in an instant. Immediately the pulling force activated as well, wanting to push all of it out to preserve my body, but I pushed the nen back in, forcing it down, and feeling a bone in my foot breaking as consequence.

It took me a short while; I was able to keep a rib at the point of bruising instead of breaking, but my survival instinct was pushed back completely to be able to keep all of this in. My whole body stood tense, but I could indeed feel the pulling force slowly going back to sleep, thinking everything was still normal. So all I had to do all this time was stop it from oozing out? Well, I say "all I had to do", but my body was under an unhealthy amount of stress.

Very carefully I moved my fingers and wrist. Will I be paralyzed again after all this, or was that a defensive mechanism of the pulling force as well?

I blinked in surprise again when after another minute of keeping it in I felt the strain on my body receding. What causes that? Is it actually devoid of danger like this? Can my body actually take this nen by now?

Well, age shouldn't matter, should it; it switches nen, it doesn't increase.

Then why does it feel so natural all of a sudden?

'I've rarely seen you so interested in anything.' I only then noticed my lips had curled up in a sort of delight. Yes, I like this power, I can get infinitely more strong with this, it's finally under my control. 'Hmm~ yes, you like the power so much, don't you.' I can't deny this. I felt it waving all through me. Not just protection of Kil until he returns, I can do a lot more for the family this way as well. I should've been allowed this sooner.

A/N

I have nothing but apologies for the long wait D8
In the meantime I had the flu, and while I was recovering I read the entirety of Tokyo ghoul in a week and suddenly started writing about that (I have good taste in men) and this got a bit behind xD
*throws plot at you to make up for lost time*

To tinycat: Thank you so much, it means a lot to me