After Marian watched the Kossith's muscled back disappear out into the hallway, she snuggled back down into the pillows.

She was on the verge of dozing off when she became aware of the lack of … anything. Voices carried up from the hall but there was nothing to hear. Curious about the visitor, Hawke slipped out of the wide bed and quickly shrugged her robe over her naked body. Taking a deep breath, she eased the bedroom door open and crept forward until she could peer through the balustrade. Her heart leapt into her mouth even as she was summoning her killing spell.

Maraas was knelt in front of Taarbas, the point of a slim blade pressed into his throat.

"I ask you again," Taarbas's voice was barely above a whisper, "will you return with me?"

Very deliberately, Maraas shook his head. The blade pierced his skin and a thin trickle of blood ran down towards his collarbone.

Taarbas's eyes briefly closed, disappointment etched clearly across his features. "You leave me no choice."

"There is always a choice." Marian's voice rang out strongly as she rose to her feet, her hand pulsating with light as she prepared to throw the spell at Taarbas.

"Marian. No." Maraas said, his eyes still fixed on the face of his former friend.

"I will not lose anyone else!" she screamed expelling the spell from her fingertips. The ball of fire hove towards Taarbas who threw himself backwards, landing with a thud sprawling on the wooden floor, the blade skittering from his hand. His eyes were wide as the fireball impacted, leaving a blackened circle as it died away.

Marian stalked down the stairs, energy lighting her hand once more.

"Marian," Maraas said as he scrambled to his feet. "Please."

"He was going to kill you. After everything, do you still hold your life so cheaply?"

"He knows only the way of the Qun."

"That's no excuse!" Marian yelled at him. "Maraas, stop defending him. You can't go around killing people just because they decide to leave your religion or cult, or whatever you want to call it. That isn't right."

"Marian, I .."

"Why did the Karasten take you?" Taarbas cut in, hauling himself to his feet. "It wasn't just the staff."

Hawke's lips twisted into a bitter smile, her eyes still flashing with anger. "He didn't like me very much. In fact, I'd go as far to say that he hated my guts."

"Because you killed the Arishok?"

"Yes." Her mouth formed a cold, hard line.

"Is that all, Hawke?" Taarbas's eyes narrowed. "We knew that Karasten was a twisted one. Sometimes even the Qun cannot prevail but we were hopeful."

Maraas glanced between Marian and towering Qunari and something clicked into place in his brain as he remembered Hawke's strange question that one night camping, saw the spark of anger, a small touch of guilt and shame in her eyes.

"The Arishok went into rut while in Kirkwall," Maraas said and watched her eyes widen in surprised horror, her anger dissipating. "He chose Hawke."

"How did you know?" she whispered.

"I didn't until just then. I'm sorry. I don't imagine you had a lot of say in it. He would have considered it your duty, and an honour."

"He did." She shivered, remembering his hands pulling at her bodice, ripping her underwear from her body.

"How was the Karasten involved?" Taarbas asked.

"Why do you want to know? They're both dead."

"I have to give my report to the Ariqun; explain why I killed one of our own and let a traitor live."

"Traitor? You mean Maraas?"

"Yes. Please tell me, Hawke."

Taarbas's clear aquamarine eyes stared into hers, she felt Maraas's hand find hers and gently squeeze in encouragement. She realised that telling the story might ensure Maraas's freedom. That Taarbas would be able to leave, free to deliver his report without trying to kill a Kossith who was neither Qunari nor Tal-Vashoth, who was simply hers.

"He said I could never speak of it," she whispered, her heart breaking again with her shame of the fierce joy she had felt when the Arishok's heart had exploded, and he died.

"Please. I need to understand." Taarbas's voice was gentle, his eyes intent on her suddenly pale face.

Marian took a deep, shaky breath. "I was summoned to the Compound, I didn't know why. When I got there, the Arishok spoke to the Karasten and took me to his quarters. He stripped me and fucked me on his desk." Her voice was flat, the angry snarl of the Kossith at her side barely registered. "Then he carried me to his bed and fucked me so many times I lost count. When I was too exhausted to please him any more and he was still hard, he summoned the Karasten." Her voice wavered and became bitter. "He had a particular talent. I think he thought he'd be using it on the Arishok." Her cheeks flamed red at the memory.

Maraas winced and closed his eyes against the sudden painful lump in his throat. He knew what she meant. It happened sometimes, that a male was born who was more interested in other males. Some squads tolerated it reasoning that it was waste not to allow the odd ones to give relief to others if they wished it. The Qun had no issue with occasionally seeking a much-needed release. The Arishok had allowed Karasten into his company fully aware of what he was.

"What did he do?"

"They both fucked me until the Arishok wasn't hard any more." Hawke's voice was dangerously flat, the tone daring Taarbas to ask any more about it.

"You think him kidnapping you was revenge?"

"As he kept saying that I would pay for what I did to Him, yes, I'm sure it was revenge." Her tone was angrily scathing.

"He was going to rape her and kill her, make Bassrath-Kata more powerful," Maraas said.

"Have you taken many lovers since then?" Taarbas asked, ignoring the Kossith, his eyes still intent on her face.

"I hadn't taken any until a few nights back, not that it's any of your business." Her eyes flicked briefly to Maraas but returned quickly enough to see the surprise in Taarbas's eyes.

"I thought his devotion to you was as a bodyguard."

"I told you that I love her," Maraas cut in.

"Do you?" Hawke chimed and her eyes were liquid when they found his face.

He shrugged. "Of course. You know that." He looked back to Taarbas, his lips twitching into a small smile. "Although I do take guarding her body very seriously. Her body is very important to me."

"You are lovers?" Taarbas seemed amazed by the idea.

"What can I say? I like big men with horns," Hawke said, lightly defensive.

"He's a different species," Taarbas almost spluttered.

She looked at him impatiently. "So?" Her expression softened suddenly. "You should know that the Arishok apologised to me, he wasn't thrilled about being at the mercy of his body in that way."

"It is something none of us experience. It is hard to imagine," Taarbas admitted, his voice slow. His eyes sought Maraas's. "Is it something you experience? The urge to be inside this female?"

Hawke frowned at being referred to so carelessly but held her tongue, curious how Maraas would answer.

"The thought of being with her would drive me mad if I let it. I have to spend large parts of my day not thinking about her otherwise I would never leave her bedroom and neither would she. I don't expect you to understand, Taarbas. You are Qunari."

Something akin to pain flitted across Taarbas's chiselled face as his eyes closed briefly. "You are right. I don't understand so much." He turned abruptly, his eyes finding the door. "I should leave. I won't be killing you today, Maraas. May you find what you seek … Kadan." He looked back at Hawke. "The Arishok named you Baslit-an and you are Bassrath-Kata. You are worthy for this empty one to follow." He inclined his head to her puzzled frown and quickly left.

Maraas looked at Hawke. "I get to live. It's a good day."

"What did he mean? I am worthy." Marian started back up the stairs towards her bedroom, Maraas behind her.

"He is Qunari. He will never understand why I abandoned the Qun. The Arishok found you alone worthy of respect in this place, and you are Bassrath-Kata. Taarbas would have been killed if he had returned to Par Vollen without the swords, killed for failing the Qun. You gave him his life. In return, he has given you mine when he should have killed me for a traitor."

"You were friends?" She gently closed the door and walked over to the bed.

"For years, a long time ago. He was the one good thing in my life until he was sent to a different squad for advance training and I never saw him again. Then we were shipwrecked here, I saw my chance to quietly leave and set up camp on the coast. I had not been there long when we met for the first time."

"You didn't stay with the Tal-Vashoth for long?" Hawke was fascinated. He had never talked about this so frankly before.

"They were fools. I couldn't be a part of such a broken ideal. It was better to build myself from nothing. To be stripped bare and cleansed of my previous life." His voice was suddenly fierce.

Hawke stroked her fingers gently down his cheek, tracing his full lower lip with one careful fingertip. "You are amazing," she whispered, drawing him closer.

He caught her hand in his, pressing a kiss to her palm. "Don't ever send me from your side."

"Where I go, you go," she agreed and frowned as he released her hand.

"I just remembered. I have something for you." Maraas said, retrieving his pack and rummaging through it.

Hawke's eyes widened as he placed the carefully uprooted plant into her hands. "You found it," she breathed. "The harlot's blush."

"Harlot's blush?" Maraas repeated, his voice light with sudden amusement. "Well no wonder it was so damn difficult to find."

The room filled with laughter as Hawke carefully laid the flowers on her night table and reached for her Kossith once more.

Fin

Thank you for reading.