°Okay so this chapter I had worked out and pretty much written before I even started on the second chapter. Somehow I just knew how to write it and I kinda worked everything else around it. There was this one song that I had on repeat when writing this (Lay Me Down with Same Smith) that really helped :) I hope you enjoy reading this as much I enjoyed writing it :)
I don't own the characters,, Cassandra Clare does, but if I did this is what they'd be up to most of the time :)°
[MAGNUS'S POV]
"Don't let me disturb you," Jace smirked. "I'm heading out – be as loud as you want." Jace's face turned hard as stone the second after. "But split my brother's lip again and I'll make sure you wish you hadn't," he added, looking at Magnus. Not sure whether he was joking or not, Magnus just nodded and watched Alec watching Jace as he left the Institute.
They had had dinner, not as loudly and communicative as they usually did, but it had been relaxing. It was a long time since Alec sat down with Magnus and did something as normal as having dinner. No one screamed or cried. No one left and was gone for a longer period of time. Magnus had enjoyed it. He knew Alec had as well cause all the while the Shadowhunter had been holding onto Magnus' hand under the table, squeezing it hard at times. After Jace leaving they found themselves in Alec's room. Alec had yawned an awful lot and Magnus did not mind spending some time, just watching his boyfriend sleep. As long as he was around. But sitting on the bed, Alec did not appear sleepy. Instead, he appeared in deep thought, smiling up at Magnus occasionally when he was found staring. But Magnus could not help staring. There was just something about this boy that had you unable to look away. Was in the hard cheek bones? The full lips that he so endearingly licked whenever stressed or bit when focused? The slight stubble on his chin and jaw? The black hair that seemed to fall in perfect strands even when they stood imperfectly into all directions? Or was it the blue eyes that looked like they told too many stories and kept too many secrets for any normal eighteen year old to have? There was only one thing about Alec's face right now, that really differed from what he normally looked like. The split lip, and it was not that he didn't have them occasionally, it was just that Magnus was never the cause.
"I'm sorry about this," Magnus said leaning in after a few long minutes of silence, tracing Alec's lips slightly before brushing his own lips against them. And he honestly was sorry about it. He had never in his wildest imagination –
Alec cut off his thinking. "It is alright. I provoked you, I deserved it –"
"You never did anything to deserve it, you hear? You never did anything to deserve anyone hurting you."
Alec pressed his lips so instantly against Magnus' that they were both taken by surprised and caught on their own breath. Within a millisecond the warlock's hands were on Alec's hips, pressing him down into the bed. Alec's hands were on Magnus' lower back, forcing him down along with the Shadowhunter.
Magnus' entire body screamed for Alec. Ever inch of his being wanted more and closer. He wanted closer than he had ever been before and he needed it now. There was not a single part of Alec's body that he did not wish to explore with his own and he needed Alec to know that. His large hands found their way under Alec's shirt and traced his chest and shoulders. Meanwhile, Alec's hands found their way to the belt of Magnus' pants and tore at it, his fingers fumbling in the dark. The memory of Alec doing that before played in the back of Magnus mind just then and he thought of the previous times they had been in the same position.
"Alec – wait," Magnus panted. He felt his chest heaving and saw Alec's do the same. Those blue eyes staring up at him in confusion, dark with lust. Magnus had to restrain himself, with whatever power he had, not to ignore his thought and continue. "I need to know that this is not one of your ways to get what you want." He regretted it the second he said it cause the look of hurt on Alec's face was instant, though Magnus had no idea how he could have phrased it differently – cause he needed it said.
Alec sat up in the bed and Magnus followed. His eyes trying to catch Alec's again but the Shadowhunter kept looking away. Until he looked up and his eyes met Magnus, steadily. "Magnus," he said, leaning in, really closely so that they could see each other clearly in the moonlight. He took Magnus' hands in his own. "I want you," he said it, without hesitation or doubt. "I want all of you and not because I need it for my own selfish cause again, but because I need you. I need to feel you and not a sadistic form of power." All the while he was speaking he placed kisses on Magnus' face and hands, never breaking eye contact.
"I know but –"
"No, no buts. I promise." Alec climbed Magnus' lap and leaned in. His lips fell so softly against Magnus' that he swore they felt like feathers. "I love you." Alec mumbled so quietly Magnus hardly heard him, but he smiled nonetheless.
"Just as I love you," he replied and he could feel Alec's cheeks move into a smile as well. They felt wet.
Magnus looked up and pulled away to find Alec's cheeks tearstained. He wasn't crying hard, he didn't even look like he was crying because he was sad. Tears simply fell down his cheeks, quietly and gently as if though there was no other way for them to fall. He was smiling, small droplets of salt water making their way into his mouth. Magnus leaned in to kiss them away. They tasted undoubtedly of salt, but also of honesty.
Alec so hardly showed emotions with others. And when he did they were intense. The same with love. He loved like most Shadowhunters, true and with passion, as if though there might not be a tomorrow. And that was the way Magnus loved him back. Cause there might not be.
[ALEC'S POV]
Alec felt his tears fall and watched as Magnus picked their hands up, still placed in Alec's lap, kissing the tears on them away, moving back to the salty drops on the Shadowhunter's neck and shoulder blades. Alec felt himself shiver under the touch and leaned his head to give Magnus further access. For the first time in too long Alec did not cringe under Magnus' touch. He did not feel like crawling out of his skin and bury himself. He did not feel like running away or screaming for him to stop. For once he was feeling as safe as he could possibly be. He felt at home. He felt Magnus shift under him and was moved to lay down. His shirt was removed, as was Magnus'. Alec could hear them falling to the floor.
Their kisses were long and full to the brink with things to tell. The tips of their tongues danced calmly against each other and they took turns smiling into the kiss. Neither's hands roamed the other's body. They just peacefully let their fingers trace patterns on each other's bodies. Magnus on Alec's chest and Alec on Magnus' shoulder.
Magnus suddenly pulled away. His eyes focused on Alec's. The Shadowhunter felt himself tense.
"What?" he asked, his hands nervously finding their way to and starting to fidget with Magnus' hair.
"You are beautiful," Magnus replied simply, as if though it was the most obvious thing.
Alec felt himself blush as he reached up and pulled Magnus in for another kiss.
[MAGNUS'S POV]
The kiss soon enough turned fiercer and fiercer, their hands getting more and more impatient of tracing taunt muscles and calloused skin. Magnus could feel Alec's hands tearing at the pants and he let him. It had been such a long time. Magnus smoothly got out of the garment and rid Alec of his sweatpants. Smiling through the panting, Alec looked up into the cat-like eyes and Magnus felt his stomach turn with lust. It was as if though someone stabbed him in the stomach and he heard himself growl in the back of his throat before turning so that Alec lay underneath him. His hands found their way into Alec's briefs and teased slightly before he grabbed the erection.
"Ah shit," Alec moaned and his back arched, pressing him closer to the warlock.
Smiling to himself, Magnus started pumping and raveled at the sight of Alec squirming under his touch, his eyes not fully open but not closed. His mouth slightly open, letting out silent 'uh' and 'ah's. Then Magnus stopped. He enjoyed the sight of realization that came upon Alec's face. Stripping Alec of the briefs and then getting out of his own, had the Shadowhunter's face change and turn into pure need. Alec slowly mounted Magnus, his hands buried deep in black hair. Magnus swiftly moved to get a condom on, before engaging his lips with Alec's once more.
"Please," Alec said. Magnus grasped the plead though nothing else was said. He let two fingers, wet with saliva, reach Alec's rear which he pushed into, grasping each emotion that passed on Alec's face. First slight pain, then discomfort and as Magnus worked up a proper scissoring motion, need for more. Alec nodded into Magnus' shoulder, letting out approving mumbles. Magnus smiled into the nape of his boyfriend's neck as he kept on going for a short while, before pulling out. Alec didn't complain, seeing as he knew what was replacing the fingers. As they joined in a kiss, Magnus let him steer and moaned loudly as Alec slid down onto him. He could feel Alec bit his lower lip, but let him. He could taste the blood of it but did not mind.
The pace was slow and steady, Magnus enjoying watching Alec, who enjoyed each thrust. His lips curving into a tight smile and his eyes clenched shut.
"Hey?" Magnus groaned and the Shadowhunter's eyes snapped open immediately, pupils large only to shrink as they focused on Magnus. "So gorgeous," Magnus breathed and Alec's mouth curved upwards to the left. His tongue licked the bottom lip before biting it, not taking his eyes from Magnus'. The warlock knew that this was a thing of Alec's. He had come to realize that much. Alec knew what Magnus wanted and he gave it to him. Jesus, he did give it to him.
Alec sat up more straight and rocked his hips along with Magnus' thrusts, his hands just above Magnus' waist to keep balance. The nails dug into Magnus' skin but he didn't mind. He could feel his forehead moist with sweat and saw Alec's hair stick to the nape of his neck.
"Please, " Alec said, but this time not as a plead, but as a demand. His eyes were hard on Magnus', who only smirked, placing his hands on Alec's hips to push him down further, keeping him there as he thrusted upwards.
Alec's eyes were wild and dark, his hair sticking to his skin and his chest heaving with hard ragged breaths. He had reached down to start jerking himself off, letting out small growls that he tried to keep in the back of his throat but hardly succeeded even once. Magnus smiled at it and chuckled between his own hard breaths.
"I'll –" Alec started but didn't finish the sentence. Magnus knew what he was going to say though – he himself was on the brink of coming. He watched Alec as he did, feeling himself being pushed over the pleasurable edge.
As they had ridden it out, Alec fell over Magnus chest, his body hot and moist. Magnus brought his arms around the Shadowhunter automatically and kissed the crown of his head and their breathing slowed down.
[ALEC'S POV]
It had been so long since Alec had felt this close to a person. Surely, Magnus and him had been close but this was just one step further than they'd been before. He had felt closer to Jace since they became parabatai and this was about as close as Alec could get to that feeling with someone but his brother. He honestly didn't think he could. Not since –
Magnus had made him forget everything for a short while, it had gotten back to him as they fell closer and closer to sleep but for once Alec didn't feel the panic coming onto him, but more of a calm that Magnus was beside him. He almost felt as if though he was folded into Magnus, safe and sound – able to just sleep and sleep and wake up, still feeling safe.
Alec woke up from Magnus' phone ringing. Gazing over at the digital clock at the screen he saw that it was 1.36AM. Magnus picked up immediately.
"Jace? You what!?" Magnus sat up so instantly that Alec felt himself bump up and down on the bed as Magnus shifted on it. His head told him to get up and figure out what was going on but his body told him to stay still and just go back to sleep. Suddenly Magnus turned to him and Alec could see, through the light of the moon shining through the window, that the cat-like eyes were shining wildly. "Alec get up."