DISCLAIMER: Angel/Buffy type people belong to Joss Whedon, Glee type people belong to Ryan Murphy and Co., and Bobi belongs to us. There is no owning of anything. Except for Bobi.

AN: So...yeah. Review?

Water Guns and Rock Band

I'll admit it. I forgot about the job thing. It didn't even cross my mind until I saw Schue struggling with a pile of papers looking like he had gone a few rounds with a Fyral demon. He told me to grab Finn and Puck and meet him in the choir room when I helped him. Knew I should have kept walking.

"Okay, first of all, I just want to say I'm not disappointed in you. This was my fault. We should have handled this in a more mature fashion."

"Someone's feeling dirty." I didn't mean for it to pop out. But no one goes super formal without having been in the muck for a bit.

Schue shook his head, "No, I just realized my part in all of this so I thought I would help out and got you all jobs."

"Really dirty" Puck agreed

"Why does Schue feel dirty?" Finn whispered to us, "I don't get it"

"At Sheets N Things" Schue tried to hide the flinch but I saw it.

"That right there. What's with Sheets N Things?"

"Isn't that the place where Mr. Ryerson hangs out like some pathetic douche?"

"He's not pathetic, guys" Schue sighed. He was losing my interest pretty quick.

"Any particular time?"

"4:00. Try not to walk out" The bell rang.

"For sure"

"Man, my mom went postal when she heard about the tires," Finn looked overwhelmed, "I don't know how I'm going to do this too"

"I'm still grounded from the fight. I ain't telling my moms shit" put in Puck

"Getting the job may actually get her off your back," I offered "if you don't telling her why you have to have a job"

"What about you?" asked Finn

"Guess I forgot" I shrugged my shoulders, "whoops!"

The rest of Friday was calm for the most part. Coach Sylvester seemed to have enacted a plan to annoy the Glee Club by encouraging the athletic teams to enjoy a "Spirit Day" or so the signs around the school said.

What this included was red, black and white soap marker over windows and permanent marker on my locker. The messages proclaiming the superior-ness of the McKinley Titans. There were a few other signs disavowing the Glee Club but I saw Puck and Finn tearing them down before too many people saw them. I was proud of them. Maybe slashing VA's tires was worth it if it brought them together as friends.

"Hey Freak!" Karofsky yelled from the passenger side of an SUV. It had slowed to the speed I was walking. With the window rolled down, he stuck a plastic squirt gun out and fired at me.

Squirt guns really? Are we five? I've been shot at by worse things than water.

"Man, that was absolutely terrifying!" But the SUV was around the corner by the time I finished speaking.

I finished the short walk to Puck's truck when I smelled something foul. I looked around a bit. Cars were leaving. Teens getting picked up. People were enjoying the Spirit Day Festivus. I couldn't find any obvious dead animals or moldy lunch lying about. The wind shifted and some freshmen started to point and laugh. The smell was me. Or at least my jeans. I still had large wet splotches around my crotch and on my legs.

Fantastic

I rolled my eyes and started to dig in my bag. I had tucked an extra skirt in my bag in case Santana believed in persistence.

"What are you doing?" The wind shifted again, "Ugh! What's that smell?"

"Get in the truck. I need to change."

Puck unlocked the truck and got in as I unbuckled my belt. He picked at the skirt making sure to get an eyeful of my paisley briefs.

"I can't believe you have a skirt I haven't seen before."

"I can't believe you aren't making this dirtier"

"I've been stunned by your sudden willingness to change in front of me. Give me a few minutes, I'll come up with something" he turned the truck over.

I wiggled the khaki skirt up my hips.

"What happened to your pants?

"Some Jacket sprayed me with something. I'm not worried"

"What are you going to do?" Puck was wary

"Give me a few minutes, I'll come up with something" I matched his smile.

Sheets N Things is a box store. And mostly dead on a Friday during evening rush hour. A woman dressed in Sheets N Things colors comes up to us with a bright smile on her face.

"Welcome to Sheets N Things. We are having a sale on bed linens and hand towels."

"Um, Mr. Schuester sent us?" Finn stammered

"Oh" the woman's smile faded to tight displeasure. "Great. Howard!" she yelled over her shoulder. A hefty ethnic man slunk out from behind a display. "The newbies are here. I'm going to take them in back. Make sure the egg timers are dusted." She walked away without looking back. In the back of the store behind a door marked Employees Only was the store room. Mrs. Schuester led us through a short maze of shelves to a utilitarian desk. The desk had an old PC and a file basket with some papers.

She sat down behind the desk, clasped her hands primly and smiled sweetly at us. I didn't trust her. She was hot and cold. Sweet and sly. Female Schuester knew how to play people. Manipulate them to get what she wanted.

"Welcome to the Sheets N Things team. My name is Terri Schuester. Assistant Manager of Sheets N Things Store 1055 Lima. Normally there would be a rigorous screening process but I need people to help my numbers. I need to make manager. I'm living in an efficiency with rusty water. Will also guaranteed me you would work for practically nothing" she waved her hands around. One big happy family. She reached into the file basket and handed us packets of paper. "Please fill out these forms and then we'll go over the orientation packet."

We all just stood there looking at her. "Um, we can't just you know start?" Puck asked looking at the papers in his hands.

"No" FemSchuester's smile faded, "fill out the forms." She promptly started to ignore us clicking on the computer's mouse. I wandered a little bit away pulling a random pen out of my skirt pocket. There were no other chairs so I tried to sit down without spreading my legs.

"Social Security number?"

"Who knows their Social Security number?" Puck groused.

"Everyone?" I already had most of my form filled. Finn and Puck were still standing looking at the W-4 form.

40 minutes and 3 arguments later, we were all standing in front of Mrs. Schuester again.

"Fantastic" Finn and Puck's forms were half filled with ink scribbles everywhere. She opened a drawer and dropped the papers in. "Now, for the orientation packets"

Finn's was already destroyed. Puck's wasn't doing too much better. After rifling through it quickly, I saw general rules, dress code, and emergency numbers.

"This is the store room. Please make sure to keep all valuables in your car. Emily is a kleptomaniac..."

FemSchuester went on for a bit leading us around the store room then the store. At the end she handed us our name tags and smocks.

"Any questions?"

Our blank looks spoke for themselves. I had stopped paying attention after leaving the store room. We were her trained monkeys. We had no responsibilities. Mrs. Schuester would tell us what to do and when to do it.

"No? Great! I have a few last things to remember for tomorrow." She pointed at Puck,"You don't talk or smile."

Finn, "You try not to knock anything down."

Me," And you try not to steal anything, okay, sweetie?" Mrs. Schuester left the three of us standing in the store room.

"Okay, what's with the racist?"

Finn's phone beeped at him, "Dude, we gotta go. Coach is looking for us."

"Wait, there's actually a game today? Sylvester wasn't just being a bitch"

"Yeah," Puck said, "Home against South. You coming?"

"I think I'm going to see if I can pick up a couple of hours now"

"Kiss up"

"Hey, makes my life easier"

"Okay, well" Puck dawdled "See you later"

"Go Team." There was a feeling. Like an open wound. Neither of us wanted to press on it too much to see where it hurt but on the other hand, I was always a little masochistic.

I thought maybe he would hug me. I hoped he would kiss me. I haven't touched another human being like that in a long time. Finn walked up and slapped me goodbye on the shoulder. Puck followed avoiding my gaze.

Mrs. Schuester promptly started whining in my ear about men and her sister. There was something in there about Mr. Schuester but not even the draw of gossip could get me to pay attention.

I was trying not to care. I was trying to be bored. I was trying to be normal. Anything but disappointed.

I shook myself. I don't know why I even cared. He was just a guy. He made me laugh and feel comfortable. He was Puck. I don't know why I cared.

FemSchuester let out a particular bitter stream of divorce and I decided to focus my energies elsewhere.

It came to me randomly. I'd been thinking about the tire slashing thing at work. Beads and beans from jars and boxes all over the floor and me yelling 'I quit!' triumphantly hovered in my mind as I swept the floor. My phone buzzed in my pocket. Someone was texting me.

I really like that new skirt. I could feel the leer from where I was hiding to use my phone.

Stop being a stalker. I need your help. I was thinking about something that was said at the 'let's punk VA lunch. I hesitated before keying in, But I can't do it myself. I need a getaway car.

When I got home I went straight to my room to change. My pants were still giving off an odor. I guess it wasn't water. I tried not to think too hard on what it could be. I found Andrew ripping linen into strips. "Can you wash my jeans, like tonight? I only have two pairs. Please?"

"Yeah, sure. What happened?"

"Athletic Spirit Day to support the guys' basketball team. The natives got restless."

"Hate it when that happens. It never ends well."

About an hour and a half later I was finishing my homework, when I heard a yelp from across the house. "What's going on?"

Andrew was shushing Spike a frantic look on his face.

"Hey guys, what's up?" It was time for dinner. I was hungry.

"Nothing"

Spike slapped Andrew on the shoulder, "You have to tell her"

"Tell me what?" My gaze narrowed on Andrew. Andrew never had to tell me things, especially bad things. Spike and Illyria trade off the honor of telling me life altering news. Andrew tells me when dinner is ready.

"Umm" he wrung his hands nervously. Andrew wouldn't meet my eyes. A light started to glimmer as my mind worked through a process.

"My pants got ruined" I guessed

"It wasn't my fault."

"No, it wasn't YOUR fault"

"You promise not to try to kill me or harm me in any way?"

"I promise" I sighed

He held out the jeans for me to see. They now had random streaks of bleach on them. Completely ruined. I growled.

"What are you going to do?"

"Pick a fight"

"He's not going to like that." Andrew still looked worried.

"Maybe he should talk to the goons who go to my school."

Spike came in the back door. "It's your responsibility to be above such-vandalism."

"'Above such vandalism'? Really?"

Spike paused, considering, "Fine, just don't get caught this time."

"Sweet. Thanks Spike, Andrew." I raced to my room firm up my revenge plans.

"I just don't think a vampire and a former Old One are conducive to raising a teenager" Robin sighed. He was a master at this game. He could get any family member to volunteer for anything with just a few well-placed words. The talent had helped Robin out quite a few times since he started working for the Watcher's Council. "I know you lost a friend and she is a connection to that but you have to think about what is best for her. She deserves to be in a place where she doesn't have to hide"

"Hide what?"

"Who she is"

"Bobi's not a slayer"

"No, but she is a part of this world. She has skills no normal teenager should have."

"Bobi grew up on the streets. She has skills that helped her survive."

"She isn't on the streets anymore and those skills are useful. It's time to pay it back"

"Pay what back, Robin? Helping save LA? Watching her family be torn apart by monsters?"

"That's not what I meant. We saved her. We gave her a life she would never have had even after the Fall of LA.

"So you're going to rip her from the life we gave her and thrust her back into her old one? Is that it? Fuck that, Robin!" Spike smashed the end button hard enough to crack the cellphone casing.

Andrew watched him pace the kitchen. "Council thinks we're unfit to care for her" It wasn't a question. Andrew knew this would be coming. He had overheard a conversation between Giles and Robin before he left for Lima. Robin had seen Bobi's file.

"They shall have to send a team of slayers to conquer us" Illyria appeared in the doorway of the basement.

"Yeah well, you may get your wish" Spike rubbed the back of his head.

"Can they really do that? I mean Illyria is her guardian"

"Winfred Burkle is her guardian. Illyria is an Old One. In the Council's eyes, Fred is dead" Spike forced air through his dead lungs to sigh explosively. "We all know what's it like to play second fiddle. I'm not having some whiny, hero complex slayer breaking her. We'll work it out somehow. She's family."

"Where would they take her?" Andrew asked quietly. He couldn't bear to say it any louder. He didn't have to with the super-hearing.

"Cleveland, maybe New York"

"The slayer schools? Talk about falling through the cracks. She'd never survive." The three of them contemplated that for a second. Andrew straightened his shoulders, "We should spend as much time with her as we can now. Protect her from that. For Gunn."

I was doing some research on my refurbished laptop when Andrew popped his head in. I was looking for something simple for Karofsky. I was still debating property damage versus emotional. I didn't want to physically hurt the guy. Where's the fun in that?

KNOCK- KNOCK- KNOCK

"Yeah?" Andrew opened the door.

"So I know you're plotting or whatever, but I think you should take a break. Call some friends. Hang out. Do 'normal' stuff. It'd make Spike happy?"

"This coming from the king of normal?"

"Okay, I'll admit it. This life isn't what society defines as normal but what normal 16 year old plots the destruction of their foes? This isn't what Gunn wanted for you.

"You're right. Gunn didn't want me plotting but he would want me to be strong."

"There are other ways"

"Says the warlock"

"Mocks the second chance"

Don't get me wrong I like Spike. He took me in. He didn't try to change me. He's not really pressuring me to get over the destruction of LA. So, while I like Spike and appreciate the comfortable home he has provided for me, I wasn't about to let this opportunity to fuck with Spike go to waste.

Deep down I know I'm disappointing him but he was getting in deep with the Council again. The Council took over LA. The Council kicked me out. They took over my life and then left me to rot with angsty singing teens.

He insists that I become normal, something I'm not. Then throws it in my face that he's still doing the Slayer's bidding. YOU get more appropriate friends.

"No one's gonna come" I said quietly. But I wasn't scared. I wasn't.

"You have friends"

"It's Spirit Day remember? The basketball team doesn't suck so there's probably gonna be a party somewhere. Spike's not going to let me go and no one is going to leave"

"I don't know. You might be surprised"

"Yeah okay." If nothing else, I could sneak out the window. I grabbed my phone and mass texted Mike, Matt and Puck. I have been commanded to have friends over. Spike just got a new entertainment center including a brand new PS3. What was that, Andrew? Free food you say?

I stared at the text surprised. I hadn't thought about it. They were the first people that came to mind. They were my friends. It had been different in LA. Being part of the crew meant survival. We became family; closer because bonds were forged. Heat of battle. Band of brothers. This was the same and different. Survival in Lima meant not thinking too hard about what had happened. There were bonds but not what I felt for the crew, I told myself.

Sometime later, I hear a creak in the hallway. Andrew suddenly burst in and a knife appeared next to his head in the door jam. He didn't flinch. "God! Don't you ever knock?" I wasn't doing anything bad. I had a history text open and a notebook.

"Bobi!" he squeaked "There are boys here!"

"What?" My phone buzzed next to my notebook.

Where you at?

"What?" My phone in my hand I slid past Andrew and crept down the stairs. Puck was standing in the foyer with Mike and Matt. Spike was trying to glare them into submission. Matt had his phone in his hand.

"Hi"

"Friends, duckie?"

"Of course they're friends" FakeFred came into the foyer from the kitchen carrying a tray of drinks. "If they weren't then they wouldn't have just walked in" she finished with a creepy smile for the guys. FakeFred tilted her head. It looked like a gesture to continue into the living room. Those that knew her recognized the tilt. Illyria wasn't happy with the intrusion but trying to pretend she was human. She had been hanging out with Spike too much.

I followed the guys into the living room. "What are you doing here?"

"You texted" Puck stated the obvious.

"Well, yeah." Spike was taking control of setting up the system. Andrew nervously hovered. "I didn't think you would, like just show up"

I wasn't paying attention to the guys. Spike was fiddling with technology. It was never good when Spike fiddled with technology more advanced than a radio. I felt, rather than saw, Puck slide up and up a hand around my lower back.

"Party was lame" he squeezed my middle. I saw FakeFred tilt her head in the corner of my eye. She didn't approve.

"Way lame" Mike had come up and threw an arm around my shoulders. "Besides, Tina has been going on and on about that guy Andrew's cooking"

Matt winced as Spike managed to make the speakers squeal, "Yeah, I'm thinking black and white cookies"

"I don't know about black and white cookies" I looked over at Andrew to see him disappearing into the kitchen. "But Andrew is a really good baker." Another squeal ripped through the living room, "Okay, That's it" I tried to yank Spike away from the TV. He was trying to plug something in. "Leave it alone, Spike, before you hurt yourself or us."

"We got it, babe" Puck was staring at my ass and Spike saw. Yeah, this was a fantastic idea.

I pulled at Spike's t-shirt to keep him from lunging at Puck who was now conferring with Matt on how to set up the PS3 to the sound system. "It's fine. Normal, even" I tried to placate him.

"They're not girls"

"No?" We both watched the three obviously male humans standing in our living room discussing sound quality. Andrew finally whacked Spike on the arm.

"Oh, okay" he gave in.

"Did you need something else? I promise they won't hurt anything" Translation: Go away.

Spike nodded in their general direction, "Mind the rules"

That threw me for a second, "ok-ay" What rules? Don't get dead?

Spike herded FakeFred out of the living room. FakeFred dropped her disguise for a second to glare at me. Honestly, she wasn't my biggest problem at the moment. I wasn't completely sure how to act now that I had friends over.

"You ready?" Puck nudged me.

"I'll watch" It couldn't be that hard.

"Come on" Matt held out the microphone to me.

I held up my hands, "No, it's okay"

"Do you know how to play?"

"No?"

"You sounded excited in the text" Mike said

"A positive attitude brings positive results?" I got snorts in reply. "Well you're guys in Glee, Glee guys as it were, and we don't have an Xbox to play Halo."

"You have it right here" Mike held up a copy for Spike's system.

"I don't know" I tried to cover up how much of an idiot I felt, "These things are just things people talk about, right? I mean, I've never seen one outside a store." Matt had the PS3 home screen up on the TV. Mike was opening up the controllers. I looked over at Puck, who was giving me a questioning look, "I grew up a little differently. Spike likes Crash Bandicoot and when he heard about the singing this popped up." I gestured to the Rock Band instruments.

Mike looked up, "Where were you growing up?"

"Saving the world" I said quietly. I spot Spike still leaning in the doorway of the living room.

Spike asked thoughtfully, "So these the guys that got you in trouble, ducks?"

The fights, I had to remind myself. He doesn't know about slashing Vocal Adrenaline's tires.

"Let's play Rock Band!" I turned back to the guys. I kinda hoped he wouldn't have it together. The longer he didn't question my after school activities, the more time I had to convince to give me my car back. Then it wouldn't matter because I would be gone.

"Cupcake" Spike sighed. I turned back and he looked defeated. I've never seen him defeated. I've seen pissed off, angry, patronizing, lecturing but never defeated.

"It was just a couple of fights. It wasn't anything big" I instantly felt bad for lying to Spike. It couldn't be helped though. I already hadn't told him for almost 24 hours. I was making restitution. I was dealing with it. I didn't need his help.

"Uh-huh." He gave Puck a stink eye. "So what sort of songs does this thing have?"

"You want to play?"

"They got a Billy Idol song, KISS or STP" Matt offered.

What? Oh, no.

I started backing toward the hall. Not good.

Puck started clicking through the songs. "You wanna try one?"

I was staying so far out of this. I went to the kitchen and hissed at Andrew to do something. He rushed me with snacks in hand back to the living room. "Just go with it!"

"I think you should do the Idol one. You sorta look like him." Mike said moving Spike toward the microphone.

"Okay. Who plays what?" Matt asked snagging a cookie off the tray

"I don't think this is going to go well." I whispered to Puck as I set the plates on the coffee table.

"Come on babe. He's a dude. He'll love it."

Uh-huh, a vampire dude, born before television was even a twinkle in the inventor's eye. I wasn't convinced, "Yeah, okay."

"Rotate?" suggested Mike

"Mike doesn't sing" Matt and Puck said together

"Why?" I asked as Puck bent over to pick up one of the guitars. I looked, sue me. His ass looked really good in those jeans.

"It's okay. I'm not really good"

"Good enough to help win Sectionals" Matt slugged him in the shoulder before handing over the microphone to Spike. "All you gotta do is sing along with the words into this microphone."

"Like karaoke, Spike" I told him, "Lorne's made you do that." Puck winked at me. Yeah, I was going to hear about that later.

"I got it, duckie." Wow, he was short with me. What a change. "What are you guys going to do?"

Puck answered while he got the song ready. "We're going to play the instruments along with you while you sing. We work together as a band."

"'Kay don't screw up, burk." Then the song started.

I sat on the couch holding my breath moving my head from Spike to Puck and back again. Watching them play, I believed the lie. I was normal. I had friends. People who cared about me enough to be angry when I got in trouble.

The screen started to flash red. "Come on, dude. Stop sucking." Puck jerked his guitar up but I couldn't stop seeing the red ballooning out on the sidewalk; seeping from claw wounds and deep gashed. The frantic whispers of "Run, Run!"

I jerked out of my seat as the song ended trying not to race to the bathroom. I was going to be sick.

Watching the two worlds collide, I had that sense of family again. The sense that I belonged here with them. But I knew that was a lie I was telling myself. I didn't belong here. I belonged in LA. Cleaning up, creating order, balance, making sure the monsters didn't overtake us again.

A quick rap at the door pulled me out of my reverie.

"When did you get a job?" Andrew hissed.

Shit

Spike and FakeFred had Puck cornered. Matt and Mike were trying not to make any sudden moves but inching towards the door.

"Spike! What are you doing?"

"Why do you need a job?"

"It doesn't matter"

"What did you do, ducks?"

"It's not her fault" Puck tried to cut in. FakeFred pinned him back with her glare. I was normal. There would be no way to pull Spike or FakeFred off or away from Puck. The gleam of disgust in Spike's eye gave me hope that he remembered he was in a room of normals.

"We should get going" Matt pulled a set of keys out of his pocket. "It's getting late."

I put my hand out to Puck. FakeFred wouldn't move. I had to get him out from behind her. He managed to get around her without looking away from me and took my hand. Matt and Mike stood by the door as I walked Puck over.

Puck squeezed my hand, "You okay?"

I nodded. I couldn't speak. This is why I don't have friends. The violence, the danger, the suddenness of death. I couldn't have people over in my own house without them being in danger.

Puck squeezed my hand again and looked over my head. Spike, FakeFred and Andrew were standing in the doorway. I looked over at Mike and Matt shuffling awkwardly.

"See ya later"

Matt rolled his eyes and held out his fist. Not his first awkward family encounter. We bumped. "Later"

Mike held out his fist too. "It was nice to meet all of you. Thanks for the snacks," Mike said following Matt to the car.

Puck lingered for a moment staring at our hands. I couldn't evoke the right emotion for the moment. I was tired. I should be thrilled. Puck was still holding my hand. He was brave enough to face up to Spike and FakeFred. I should be thinking that maybe he could survive in my world. Maybe we could be together. But all I was thinking about was that I couldn't stay in his.

The door closed quietly. The game screen was still showing the scores for the band. The guitars and the drum kit were still setup, almost in the way. Spike was trying not to pace. He was trying not to be angry. But he was. Spike was disappointed in me. I could feel it roll off him in waves.

"Why didn't you come to me? We could have fixed it."

"While you may enjoy working for super librarians and their magic stuffed poodles, I certainly don't. I'm not about to get into bed with Buffy the Party Blonde"

"Hey!" Spike took a step towards me, "She has done more for you -"

"Oh, please!"

"This isn't the time!" Andrew stepped between us, "It's late and we're all tired. We can discuss this in the morning"

"I thought you were just hanging out" Spike growled. He wasn't having any success at containing his anger.

I tried to defend myself, "I was"

"You need a job to pay back some kind of damage," he waved a hand "that's not hanging out, cupcake"

"They deserved it!"

Lyri spoke up, "You defeated your enemies honorably?"

I'll admit that threw me. There is no way to lie to the God-King. There is also no way to spin what we did as honorable. Slashing someone's tires in the dead of night while they practiced was immature and petty.

"Like they deserved an honorable defeat" I scoffed. I couldn't look Illyria in the eye. This had occurred to me when we were planning. But I ignored that voice.

"You have shamed me. You have shown your value"

A dagger at my throat. I couldn't breathe. But she was the one who understood. Illyria, the Old One, had been left behind, forgotten and powerless. Told to be anybody else.

I shamed her. I took a shaky breath. I tried to feel nothing.

"Yeah, well, thems the breaks"

I put on a good front. I didn't meet her eyes but the space between her eyebrows was close enough.

Spike sighed, "It's late, duckie. Get some sleep"

I didn't rush. I didn't slam. I was what they wanted me to be. Like everyone else. Someone who doesn't fight demons. Someone who belonged.