Disclaimer: I. AM. WOMAN.
CHAPTER FOURTEEN – THE GIFT
I slumped back in a chair as I pensively yawned, staring at Mirta who perched her armed on the flower shop counter. It had been a slow day with only a few customers coming in, so I allowed my mind to wander.
Recently, at night, I've started reliving the moment my mom left me at home waiting in the dark for her to return. In the dream, my eyes keep sleepily staring at the dark window, waiting for my mom's silhouette to return, eternally. It never showed.
I've long gotten used to the sharp pang of loneliness in my chest as I awake up from the reaccuring nightmare. I've long accepted the fact that she, a mother who I used to seek the attention of, tainted everything, my birthday, my life, and even my dreams. Without any sincere remorse, she introduced me to the feeling of isolation and turned me into a wuss.
A wuss.
Hah.
A wuss who still dreams about their mother leaving them after decades. Perfect .That was precisely why I hated her.
I shook my head, replacing my unpleasant memories with another woman, Flora. That girl interested me, and even though I was currently living her life, I wanted to learn more about her. I wanted to learn anything and everything.
"Hey Mirta, tell me something about Flora."
Mirta quirked her eyebrow as she rested her chin on the heel of her arm. "Well, she's nice? She's talented. She's—"
"I mean something other than that."
"Like?"
I paused, questioning what the hell I was wanted to know, but I just met an irritating blank. "I don't know," I grumbled, rather frustrated at my own confusion.
Then my phone buzzed with a text message from Flora asking me to go to a bar. Why? Was she asking me out on a…date?
"Hey Mirta, if a girl asks to eat lunch together, is that a date?"
"Hmmm…Well, it matters on who the girl is."
"Your co-worker, Miss Treehugger."
My eyes lit up with surprise. "I guess so." I grinned. "Then again, I don't think Flora is that bold. Maybe it isn't—"
"It's a date," I snapped. "I got to go. I got a date."
With Flora…
I proudly grinned from ear to ear as I started to the car.
ººº
" Why is she here?" I hissed with narrowed eyes directed to that woman who dared to call herself my mother. It turned out that she hadn't invited me to a date; she had invited me to hHell. Here I was, standing at the doorway to the private room in the Putties, Booties...Cooties Bar? I didn't give a damn for the freakin' bar's name.
"Who is this lady Riven?" that woman asked in an interested tone.
"Ummmmmm…" Flora nervously hummed without meeting my eyes, obviously trying to ignore the malice emanating from me. "Flora, meet my mom. Mom, meet my friend Flora."
"Ahhh…A friend. Nice to meet you Flora,"she purred. I just grunted and plopped myself on a couch at the farthest corner of the room. "What a nice friend you have Riven."
Unnerving silence settled in the room. Flora tried to destroy the awkwardness by starting a conversation about food which we easily ignored. When the waitress entered, I watched as the waitress's pink cheeks lit up with excitement.
"Oh my GOSH! RIVEN? Autograph, autograph," she mumbled as she fumbled with a notepad after setting the drinks and food down. I could feel Flora's wary gaze on me but I ignored it and gave her a cold shoulder. She deserved it.
"Um…what is your name?" Flora timidly asked the waitress.
"Roxy," the waitress squeaked. After a few seconds of tense hush as she signed the autography, Flora's husky voice broke out.
"Here you go dear—I mean...Here you go." I could literally feel the anxiousness emanating from Flora.
"Thank you so much! And here is your food." She shyly lowered her head at Flora before scurrying out. I spared a glance for Flora as I wondered what Flora thoughts were after tasting the first bite of stardom.
"Um… your food is here, Mom," Flora said to that woman who I definitely didn't recognize as "Mom". What "Mom" would abandon her son at nine? Angered, I shot Flora a piercing glare. She immediately got the hint that she wasn't supposed to call her and sent a crooked smile as a reply.
"Um…Flora, you sure you don't want to eat anything?" Flora asked me.
I grunted.
"Leave her alone Riven. She has made it clear that she has no intention to be polite. What a nice friend you have," the woman scoffed, "She didn't even wish you happy birthday."
A dark chuckle came from me. "Like you ever cared," I muttered.
A startling bang erupted from the table as Ms. Riven violently slammed into it. "Sorry, but I can not deal with your friend's rudeness. I'm leaving." She left out of the room without taking a single bite of her food, slamming the door shut with a thud.
"Of course she would leave. She left me when I was nine on my birthday and she leaves me again seventeen years later on the same day," I scoffed dryly.
"Riven…"
"Don't you dare pity me," I fiercely hissed. My teeth grinded as I angrily glared at the untouched food. Then a muffled sob erupted.
When looked at Flora, her head was raised up in the air. I could see hints of tears welling. Shit…was she going to cry? I couldn't stand it when girls cried, showing their fragile weakness inside of their heart. Correction. I couldn't stand it when girls cry because of me. I had no idea what to, and it frustrated me to madness. Was I supposed to comfort her?
How do you comfort a girl? Hug her?
I softened. "Look, I—"
She just a sneeze.
Stupid girl who worried me for nothing.
Flora heaved a sigh before turning to me, pursing her lips with her distressed eyes lowered.
"I don't like it. I don't like how you're crying all by yourself." I stared with amazement at Flora as a sheen of silver tears reflected in her eyes. Then she sniffled, and the first tear rolled down, freezing my body. "All that hate is killing you from the inside out. Hating your mom, refusing to forgive her, and crying by yourself—it all causes pain. Nothing improves. Instead, hate eats you from the inside."
She stunned me from head to toe. It was the first time anyone felt pain because of my hate and sobbed sincere tears for me; she was the first. Somehow, her tears shook my heart, making it tremble like the shaky aftershock of an earthquake.
"I understand why you hate her and I know that she isn't the best mother in the world, but don't you see it?" she continued with wracked sobs.
"Look, I can't just forgive her after all she has done to me in the past." My voice shook, and I realized the tightness in my throat, the overwhelming emotion gathering my chest, and my riled up appearance. "You can't understand."
"You're right. I can't understand, so help me understand. Why can't you forgive?"
"Why should I forgive her?"
"Because you'll be happier and free."
Flora shook her head. All of a sudden, I didn't know what to say to this crying girl who's tears froze me on the spot and stole my breath away, bringing me back into reality.
What do you say when a girl is shedding sincere tears for you as your benefactor? Thank you? I'm sorry?
This is why I hated when girl pitied me, and here Flora was, crying for me. At that moment, I could feel my heart of stone slowly cracking, tiny chips of stone falling off.
"I'm…I'm just…I'm just sorry. Sorry for being so emotional and for spilling everything onto you. I just want you to smile." Flora hurriedly dried her tears on her coat's sleeve. I didn't know whether I should have heaved a sigh of relief that she finally stopped crying. If she had kept on crying, what would have happened?
"Thanks for caring?" I could hear something move inside my chest as she gave the gift of the warmest smile in the world.
"Riven, I'm here for you to depend on, so rely on me. Don't suffer all by yourself. Anyways, are you thirsty?" Flora offered the glass towards me in a composed manner as if she hadn't been crying before. "It's strawberry."
"That's ok."
"Is you because you're mad at—"
"It's not you. I just don't have the appetite."
She accepted my response without a fight and wiped away the rest of her tears. For the rest of the meal, she silently ate her salad, taking dainty bites, and neatly wiping her mouth.
"Um…Riven? Can you drive me home?"
"Sure." An odd look appeared on her face. "What?'
"No…I thought you would be more mad since I invited you here without telling you that your mo—I mean your…"
"I'm fine, so call her mom if it helps."
Flora gulped, blinking unsurely, but continued anyways.
"Well, I invited your mom without telling you. Well, it is more like your mom invited me. Anyways, I thought you would be mad, even furious, and I just want to say sorry."
A few seconds ago, I was furious, but somehow, being with Flora calmed me down a whole lot. Just being with her brought me sense of peace and secureness.
"I'm fine now, so let's go. I'll pay for the bill."
"It is ok I'll—"
"The man pays." Flora opened her mouth to say something. "I'm still the man even in a woman's body."
Even though she still disagreed, she accepted my proposal.
After paying for the meal, I gave Flora a ride home with the radio tuned to random music station, and I didn't miss the smile on her face when Bob Marley came on.
So she likes reggae.
That feeling of wanting to learn more surfaced again.
When we arrived, Flora immediately invited me in. "Come in. I have something to give you."
So for once, I did obeyed her. I
"Please wait here for a moment. I need to get something."
stared at the new flowers she planted before I collapsed on a couch. While I waited in the living room, I lazily stared at random pieces of furniture before I spotted something out of place—the countdown calendar. Thirty days were already crossed off. For some reason, I wanted to rip off the calendar really badly.
My heart jumped when the lights went out. A blackout? Then a melodic, but deep tune started singing slowly as if it were singing a lullaby. A row of lights entered and I could see Flora's gentle expression glowing as she sang.
Happy birthday to you
Happy birthday to you
Happy birthday, dear Riven
Happy birthday to you
Silence.
Flora hurried turned around with scatterbrained expression and headed back towards the kitchen.
"I'm sorry! I knew you hated your birthday, but I'm so stupid. Of course you don't want to celebrate it. I'll put this back immediately," Flora rambled, floundering as she began to scurry back to the kitchen with the cake. My hand shot out to grab the tail of her shirt.
"I'll blow it out."
Flora seemed a bit startled at first but that expression quickly shifted to a relieved one. After a few blows, all twenty four candles went out, and we were left in alone in complete darkness. The darkness increased my hearing senses. I could hear Flora's steady breath as she inhaled and exhaled, and I suddenly became self conscious.
"I'll go turn on the lights," she timidly spoke. I listened to her footsteps and rested my eyes for a few seconds when the lights flickered back on. "I'll go get the spoons and the knives." I stopped her again.
"I don't want to see that knife that you tried to kill me with." I smirked at Flora's frown. "Let's just used what we were born with."
I promptly lifted up my palms.
"You'll get sick."
"Fine Mother. Then let's just eat the strawberries on the top first before cutting the cake. Just, and only just the strawberries."
Flora pondered for a second a two before agreeing. She picked up her first strawberry and held it out to me. I stared at the red fruit with confusion.
"I can get my own strawberries."
"You are supposed to go like this." Flora opened her mouth wide like a baby bird and went "ahhhhh".
I grimaced. If she seriously thought I was going to do that humiliating, weak act that babies did, Flora had crossed the border. "
You know, you are the most embarrassing person I've ever met."
"What?" she retorted looking insulted before lifting the strawberry to her lips. "Fine…Don't eat the delicious, juicy, bright, appetizing strawberry."
Somehow refusing Flora's gift of a strawberry didn't feel right. Flora started placing the strawberry in mouth, but I quickly grabbed her wrists. Flora crinkled her eyebrows in confusion.
"What's wrong?"
"I accept your gift."
My neck protruded, and lips reached for the strawberry in Flora's fingers, envelopoing the whole fruit with one solid bite. The cooling taste of sweetness exploded in my mouth as I chewed and stole a glance at Flora's face, which blushed a new shade of crimson. Interesting.
Suddenly I froze. I felt an oddly warm sensation in my lower body.
"Be right bacck." I made a mad dash for the restroom, and a few seconds later, I exploded from it. My heart raced as my face twisted into an indescribable expression, a mix of confusion, frustration, anger, annoyance, shock, and panic.
"I'm bleeding into my underwear!"
On my twenty-fourth birthday, Mother Nature gave me a gratuitous gift.
"Riven? …I hate to break it to you, but you got your period (1)."
And that was our troubled couple's little heartfelt conversation. This is romance after all, so you gotta have some of that fluffy, gushy, sparkly moments where the guy realizes at this is is - SHOCK - different. I'm not sure if it's drama though. Humor? Hmm...
(1) "the periodic discharge of blood and mucosal tissue from the uterus, occurring approximately monthly from puberty to menopause in nonpregnant women and females of otherprimate species." -
That's for males who might not know what a period is. What? It has happened.
Renachi