Don't own.

Seddie.

Little story: I couldn't sleep last night (not because I was writing because I was coughing) and I finally fell asleep at like 3:00 in the morning. Well then Lauren woke up and asked me to bring her to school because it was raining so I decided to be nice and so I brought her to school. I got home and had a text from Lauren that she forgot the batting for some project she's doing in her creative clothing class at school so I had to drive all the way back to the high school (it's not very far but I feel like shit). Then when I got home our porch was all wet and apparently when our porch gets wet it gets slippery so I slipped on the porch. So now not only does my throat hurt, I feel like crap and have to work tonight but now my knees hurt too from falling. Ugh. Sorry about my little rant.

X

I hadn't seen my mom since Cassie's funeral, and I couldn't think of a better time to go see her than now. Now. One day before Sam came home. I wanted to go see Sam, but if I did I would give away that she was going home tomorrow. The nurses still hadn't told her. They had called me two days ago to tell me that tomorrow was the day I got my wife back. I walked up to apartment 8-D and opened the door. She would probably run out with a shot gun.

Or a bat.

"Oh, Freddie. I thought you were a burglar."

"So you were going to fend me off with a bat?"

"Yeah," she set the bat down and walked towards me, "everything okay?" she asked. I nodded.

"Yeah, just thought this visit was overdue."

"Very overdue." She hugged me.

"I'm sorry, mom. Things just have been different." She moved away from me and walked over to the couch, sitting down.

"Yeah, I know. Spencer's kept me in the loop. How does the apartment look?"

"Good. You wouldn't even recognize it. But I'm still stuck. I want to keep the pictures of Cassie put away, but Sam seems to do better when they're around. I don't know. It's so hard being married now. I love Sam, but everything I do is for her. I know I need to be around for her and think of her and everything, but it's like I have to push aside how I feel to adapt to how she feels." My mom sighed.

"You should BOTH be thinking of each other. I know it's hard on Sam because she's a mother. If I ever lost you before I had a chance to see you smile I would go crazy, too." I looked at her.

"Mom,"

"Okay, but I was just trying to protect you. You're my only child, Freddie. Until the day I die, and I plan on dying before you, I'm going to continue to try to protect you. Whether you're 16 or 36. You never stop being my son just because you're growing up."

"Okay, mom."

"The point is, I know that Sam needs much more support than you do because she carried Cassie inside of her. But don't forget that you're still in this as well. Cassie was your daughter, too. You can't keep trying to push off how you feel to help her. I know that's how you are, Freddie. You're always thinking of other people, but you have to give yourself a chance to grieve too. You two have to compromise. It can't just be what Sam wants or what you want. You both have to come to some sort of agreement. Starting with Cassie's pictures. That's what a marriage is. Compromise." I smiled. My mom was crazy, but nobody else had lived with her. She was always giving me advice that actually helped me out.

"So, I was thinking for your birthday—"

"My birthday isn't until February."

"I know that, I gave birth to you, remember?"

"Okay, fine."

"For your birthday I thought if you and Sam were up to it we could take a trip to California." I laughed. Sam and my mom taking a trip together? Not likely to happen.

"Sam's never going to go for that."

"Well you could talk her into it. I think it would be nice. Get out of the state for a little while."

"Mom, Sam's not going to go all the way to California with you. No offence. She can't stand authority that long."

"Well, just think about it."

"Okay, I will think about it and talk to her about it."

"Good, let's say we go get some lunch." She said. My phone started ringing.

Sam Calling

"One second, mom." I stood up and walked away.

"Hey, sweetheart."

"I miss you." She mumbled. She sounded sad.

"I know. I miss you, too."

"Are you going to come see me today?"

"I can't. I've got a lot to do."

"But babe…."

"I'm sorry. I'll come see you tomorrow. I promise."

"Freddie, come on. Do you want me to die of boredom?" I laughed. Sam, always so dramatic.

"You aren't going to die because I didn't come see you one day."

"I might. You don't know that."

"Listen, angel. I have to go. I love you."

"No."

"No what?"

"You're going to talk to me." Yeah, she was definitely ready to go home. She had her attitude back.

"No, I'm going to go do what I was doing before you called me. Come on, now. I have to go."

"I hate you."

"No you don't."

"I know. But please just talk to me."

"Baby, I can't. I'm busy. I love you. I will call you tonight before you go to bed and I'll come see you tomorrow."

"Promise?"

"I promise. I love you."

"Fine. I love you, too." I hung up the phone and my mom and I left.

X

As long as I was out and making amends with people I hadn't seen in a while, I decided that one thing I needed to do before Sam got home was go to prison. I still hated Brad, I probably would always hate him, but in order to let Cassie go and get rid of this guilt I had to learn to forgive Brad for all the shit he did to Sam. I figured if Sam could do it, then I could probably manage it without killing him. I followed a police officer to a table and just sat there. The only thing going through my mind was to not end up here myself. Brad wasn't worth that. They brought his sorry ass out and I hated his face even more. He had lost a lot of weight, not that he had had any weight anyway, but he just looked old now. He sat down across from me.

"Freddie—"

"Don't talk to me unless I ask you something. Because trust me, I have a lot of questions for you Brad."

"I'm so sorry about Cassie."

"Don't talk about Cassie. You don't deserve to think or say her name. She was MY daughter. You have no part of her, me, or Sam."

"Look man—"

"What the hell were you thinking? Making Sam have sex with you so she could leave? Do you know how disgusting that is? You were supposed to be my friend."

"I don't know, Benson. I don't know what the hell I was doing. She's just so—"

"Hot? Yeah. I know. She's my WIFE. That's not an excuse."

"I'm not making excuses, Freddie. I know it was stupid. I didn't even think about how messed up it was until I came in here. Dude, Sam's been on my mind since I met her. I know it's creepy, probably, but since the lock in when Carly tried hooking us up—"

"That was a long ass time ago. Sam and I started dating just four days after that and we're married now. Just because back in high school Carly tried setting you two up doesn't mean when you see her on the street you get to just pick her up."

"I get that, now."

"You really messed her up. Do you know how long it took me to get her to trust me even a little bit? Then she thinks she can trust you and you just take advantage of her. And don't even get me started on the fact that you could have killed her AND our baby."

"I'm sorry." He sighed. My thoughts were all mixed up. I didn't know what I wanted to do more. Question him or yell in his face.

"Just tell me why the hell you would even force her to have sex with you."

"I didn't rape her."

"Not technically, but you should have let her leave. You had no business touching her or kissing her and forcing her to stay there."

"I didn't force her to stay, I gave her the option."

"When?"

"Before we went up to my apartment. I said 'let's go up to my apartment instead of sitting in the car, unless you want me to take you home.'"

"That's the stupidest thing I've heard. That's not giving her the option to leave. You locked her in your apartment and told her she could leave if she had sex with you." Brad shook his head with a smile.

"Benson, you were always going on about how great it was to be married to Sam."

"Yeah, because she's MY WIFE. And marriage isn't just about sex. And besides that, you knew she was married to me. You were supposed to be one of my best friends and then you turn around and take advantage of MY WIFE."

"I thought that's why you married her, because dude, she's—"

"Watch yourself, Brad." He laughed.

"You did a good job teaching her."

"Shut up. I'm not afraid to kill you in here. I just wanted you to know that you will no longer have a part of our lives. I'm sure you already knew that, but even after you get out years and years and years from now, just know there will never be a friendship again. Ever." I stood up and walked out. I didn't want to hear him talk about Sam anymore.

I was ready to sleep all day. Now that everything was done at the apartment I had nothing to occupy my time. Sam was in session so I couldn't call her and Carly was working at the news station. Spencer was gone. I didn't know where he went, but he wasn't home. I drove back to the apartment. I walked upstairs and unlocked the door. The apartment looked new, but it still felt empty. I was ready for Sam to come home. I opened a picture message to Sam so I could send her a long message.

Hello, beautiful. This nub is about to make you smile. I'm the luckiest man in the world to have you as my wife. You're smart, funny, sarcastic and fun to be around. I never thought I'd fall in love with you, but now that I have I can't imagine a life without you. You are my life, my air, the reason the sun rises in the morning. I can't wait until you come home. I miss spending the day cuddling with you, looking at you, kissing you whenever I want. I hate going to bed alone and waking up alone, but all of that will be over soon. I love you more than technology, you are the other half of me. I'm going to take a nap, but never forget how much you mean to me.

X

Yay!

Reviews are like…having 2 ½ hours until the love of your life gets out of jail.

So submit them.