Woo! We're back everyone! Sorry for the wait, I had to plan this out well coz it's quite a pivotal chapter, but did anyone catch 'The adventures of Neji-kun'? It's a filler I did, which connects into this story and might make a few minor details make a bit more sense to you all, so I advise you go read it first. Kay kay, enjoy the chapter! (Warning: bad language will follow)

Chapter 14

Uchiha Sasuke fell out of a tree.

Hard.

On his backside.

Vey elegant.

For a father to be.

This thought triggered a string of thoughts previously disconnected from Sasuke's brain after the fall.

"Ahh! Fucking Kami what the Hell?!"

There, now he felt better. Now let's just examine the situation. With calm and intelligence.

"Fuck! I mean, no, no! Not that! Hell! It's not me! It can't be!"

Okay, that may have been a necessary outburst.

"Ahhhh!"

Sasuke kicked himself. This was just getting ridiculous. The raven promptly grabbed both knees and curled up into the fetal position, eyes shut tightly, with his back pressed up hard to the trunk of the tree. He didn't have to deal wit this particular problem at the moment. There were many, many others he could be dealing with. Such as Itachi. He felt better already. Shakily Sasuke stood up, adjusted his shirt, and walked away from the tree, taking the main street down through the middle of Konoha.

As he passed the office tower of Tsunade, Tenten and Neji emerged from the doorway, Neji weakly holding onto Tenten's arm, but both stopped short when their gaze fell on the Uchiha.

Moments passed, before Neji slowly detached himself from the brunette, flicked a strand of hair over his shoulder, and stared blankly at the raven. "Uchiha...why are you sucking your thumb?"

Sasuke remained still and silent as his brain ticked round slowly. Ah yes, he had forgotten to do that one thing. Slowly, Sasuke removed his thumb from his mouth and stared at it for a minute or two, as if wondering how it had got there. Very cautiously, the Uchiha bent one arm backward to search his back pocket, checking that his safety blanket was, indeed, at home.

Once he was satisfied, Sasuke looked up, stuck his hands in his pockets and continued to slouch down the street as if all was well. Tenten grabbed him by the back of the collar. "He's coming too."

Naruto stared at Hinata blankly. Minutes passed. And the blonde burst out laughing.

Hinata looked slightly miffed.

"Ahahahha!! No way, Hyuuga Hinata making perverted jokes. I must be dreaming, did I eat some bad ramen or something? ", Naruto wheezed slightly as he regained his breath. Hinata waited patiently, and said.

"Naruto you're over-reacting, and yes you are pregnant. I can SEE the babies."

A blank stare was her only answer. "Okaaay, Hina, might this be taking it a bit too far. I mean, pretending to be able to see my man babies is just a little freaky..."

Naruto paused. Looked at Hinata, looked at his stomach looked at Hinata again.

'Oh dear Kami, Byagukan.'

Of course, these mildly coherent thoughts never had a chance to be heard by anyone other than Naruto and the demon residing inside him, who was finding it very funny, because at that moment Tenten burst in through the door, dragging Neji and a very bedraggled Sasuke behind her.

"Oh, there you are Hinata! Sorry if I was interrupting anything", she added with a wink, seeing Hinata still gently holding Naruto's hand in hers.

The two stared at the brunette blankly, got the gist and jerked apart. Well, Hinata did. Naruto fell off his chair and remained on the floor, eyes open but not seeing.

Neji looked at the pale girl questioningly. Hinata nodded. "Yes. I think he's in shock, it's all a lot to take on board."

Tenten was now even more confused. Firstly Hinata had just said a whole sentence without stuttering or even blushing, secondly, she and Neji seemed to have some sort of telepathy going on, and thirdly Naruto was being quiet. Very quiet. Almost unnaturally so.

"Um, I am missing something?"

45 minutes later, Tenten was staring down sadly at the cup of cold tea in front of her. Neji had somehow managed to escape, again, deciding to risk the horrors of the outside world over the uncomfortable conversation that followed. Hinata had gone to fix more tea for the injured parties. Naruto was still lying spread-eagled on the floor, eyes closed. And Sasuke had refused to come out of the bathroom the whole time.

'So', thought Tenten to herself,' Naruto is pregnant' The words played themselves over an over in her mind as she tried to absorb the new knowledge, all thoughts of going home to clean off the sweat and grime of the mission forgotten.

Suddenly, she stood up, knocking the tea cup to the floor, causing Hinata to frown disapprovingly as she re entered the room. "Naruto?" she questioned, wary of the outcomes of what she was planning to ask, "have you slept with anyone recently?"

For some reason, this caused the Kyuubi to laugh raucously inside Naruto's head, making him sit up and take notice. "No.", was the stony reply. But the brunette still refused to stand down. "Are you sure?"

"Yes", replied the blonde icily, tones so unfamiliar to all there. "Now could you all please leave? Hinata, thank you. Tenten...go take a shower. I want to be alone right now."

"Naruto-"

"Please, Hinata. Go check that Neji hasn't killed himself or something."

"Hai", replied both girls and retreated slowly to the door.

"Naruto", said the Hyuuga girl softly as she exited, "please, just come to me if you need-"

"I know. Ja ne, Hina-chan."

The door clicked shut, leaving the apartment smothered in silence. Naruto poked his stomach, lifting his shirt to see. It looked perfectly normal, flat, toned, with the seal decorating most of his midrift. A thought came to him suddenly, only to be wiped aside by the voice of Kyuubi growling, "They will remain unaffected by my presence, and I have no desire to harm them", from inside the cage holding him captive. Naruto squinted up at the great beast, "You? Having no desire to harm something?"

"They are my container's kits, and therefore demand some respect."

The blonde sighed, breath ruffling his fringe. "Are they really there, Kyuubi?" The fox terminology was now familiar to him.

There was a brief silence, as Naruto felt Kyuubi cast chakra round the body, searching.

"Yes."

"Two? Like Hinata said?"

"The Hyuuga are wise. The girl was right, twins."

"Twins", murmured the blonde silently, before starting up, eyes fierce with anger. "But I didn't ask for this! I'm not ready for children! I'm at the top of my game. I'm a guy for crying out loud!"

Naruto sank to his knees once again, "I don't want-not now..." His voice was thick with suppressed tears, "I don't even know who it was! I could have been raped for all I know! Why...why..." Tears were flowing down his face, leaving glistening, silvery trails. "I can't take care of them! I haven't got anybody! N-No one..."

It was too much. He couldn't hear Naruto speak like that. It wasn't the strong, laugh in your face, loud mouthed blonde he knew. The Naruto he grew up with, laughed with, fought with, ran away from, only to return to him once again. 'I've hurt him too many times', thought Sasuke, hand on the door knob, trembling slightly. One part of his mind was screaming at him to turn around and go home, it was nothing to do with him, but Sasuke knew it was. 'I have to take responsibility...'

'No you don't!', screamed the panicked voice in Sasuke's head. "Yes, I do", said the raven out loud. "I'm not a coward." Opening and closing the door quickly, so he couldn't change his mind (not that an Uchiha would), he strode over to Naruto, knelt down, and took the sobbing boy in his arms, stroking his wild hair.

They stayed like that for a while, the voice in Sasuke's mind smiling happily.