I'm Not a Student at an All-Girls' School!

Episode 14: The Secret of Chao Lingshen!

The second Negi left for the bathroom (he drank a lot of water during their scavenger hunt for Chao), Setsuna glared at Naruko and Chamo. "Both of you are mean…"

"Sorry," Chamo apologized as the blonde merely laughed it off.

A pause settled in as Naruko looked between the animal and half-yōkai. A minute later, she asked, "Soooo… any reason why you guys're dressed as bunnies?"

Her face turning as bright as a tomato, Setsuna began to stutter her answer as Chamo sighed, straightening his bunny ears and taking out a cigar. Puffing out a smoke, Chamo answered calmly, "We've been goin' around looking for Chao Lingshen."

"Chao-san? Whatever for?"

Puffing out another smoke, Chamo answered, "Remember that weird watch Aniki got from Chao back when we rescued her?"

Naruko nodded, remembering the odd pocket watch. Tapping his cigarette onto the ash tray to get rid of any ashes, Chamo continued, "Turns out, the watch's a time machine, and because it's a tech far ahead of our time, we need answers from her."

"A time machine!?" Naruko exclaimed in a loud voice. Chamo nodded before, not even a second later, the rodent and Setsuna merely faulted on their faces when Naruko then asked, "What's a time machine?"

It was there that Setsuna answered, "A time machine is a device which allows a person to manipulate time and space and go back or forward in time."

The blonde hummed with a blank look. Chamo sighed, "Think of it this way, Ane-san. With the time machine, you'll be able to go back in time to see your parents when they were younger, or you can go back and change something that you didn't like and turn it into something new and different."

Another period of the blank face before Naruko yelled, "A time machine! Go back and forward in time!? That. Is. AWESOME! Though, I don't really get the point of going forward in time, but still! The ability to go back in time, tebane! If I had that… If I had that… I could… I could…!"

The blonde froze, a distant memory of two boys, one laying on the ground, another on his knees, the frozen waters of rain falling on the two. Setsuna and Chamo tilted their heads in confusion as Naruko quickly gripped her forearm tightly, biting her inner lip.

"If only I…" Naruko whispered.

"Fufufu, thinking of old memories, Naruko-chi?"

The group flinched and turned to see the one person who was the center of their conversation.

"Chao!"

"Yup, at your service!" The Chinese greeted, looking at Setsuna, "So! How was the time travel, ne?"

Giggling, Chao continued, "I felt that it would be better for you to experience it first hand, soooo~ I slipped in some sleeping pills into your tea! I apologize, Setsuna-san."

"What!?"

"Before anything else," Chamo suddenly interrupted, "I have to ask… Time Travel, whether it's through Magic or Science, it's just not possible in this time and age. No matter how much of a genius you are, you just can't do it. Which brings me to my question, who are you?"

"Before that!" Naruko suddenly appeared in front of Chao, holding the bun-headed girl's hands, surprising everyone. "Can you make another one of those time machines for me!? No! Wait! Better yet, give me everything you got about those time machines! I just have to make one for myself, dattebane!"

"Umm…" Chao sounded out sheepishly, "S-sorry, Naruko-chi, no can do…"

"Awww, but why!?"

"Well, first, I can't just give away time machines willy nilly. If I do that, everyone would just abuse the machine and use it for their own nefarious purposes. You understand, ne?"

"Well, yeah… but…"

"And second, well, making one was hard enough, making two and three was easier, but I just don't have the necessary resources to make a fourth one! If I had, I would've given it to you as thanks the day before!"

"What? Awww…"

"And thirdly, while making one for yourself is admirable, you have to take into account of how to make one in the first place. First, you have to know how to make the watch itself, then comes the complex seals and dials and runes you'll have to sketch and etch onto the watch's pieces. Then you have to go into more detail and make the watch, which, by the way, took MONTHS! And don't get me started with the spell ritual needed to make it! Ahahahaha, I have to say, even with my genius and everything, I had to have extra help in making it! Ahahahahaha!"

Chamo and Setsuna was confounded. On one hand was the genius Chao laughing away with how she was able to make the time machine (with an extra hand) and on the other was the downed Naruko, pouting over the fact that she couldn't get her own Cassiopeia.

A series of pouting and laughing later, Chao calmed down enough to give her own calm face at the calm Setsuna, query Chamo and pouting Naruko.

"Anyway, going back to your question, Chamo-chi. You want to know my secret identity, yes?"

"That's right."

"Fmmm… I would tell you… I could tell you… but where's the fun in that? The bad guy always wait until the last moment to reveal his-slash-her real identity, but then again, I'm not like most bad guys, so I'll tell you."

Seeing the question marks on Setsuna and Chamo's head, the Chinese laughed. "Always express yourself randomly! It'll throw off your opponents! That was Rule # 5 that my late grandpa always told me back in the day!"

Naruko nodded, "True true. I always did that back in my academy years. Though, I was still an idiot, I always made myself look random with my pranks and all."

"Indeed!"

"Random always help out."

"I can agree to that, Naruko-chi!"

"All praise the random deity!"

"And the ramen god! Don't forget the ramen god, Naruko-chi!"

"Ooh! Nice one, Chao-san! Definitely the ramen god too! Let's not forget the Lord of the Logs-…!"

"Naruko-san, Chao-san, please be serious!" Setsuna yelled as the two pouted.

"Booh, you're no fun, Setsuna-san…" Naruko mumbled as Chao nodded. The swordswoman shivered in anger as she threatened to cut the two in half. It took Chamo all he had to calm the raven head down.

"HAH!" Chao suddenly roared, "Sometimes, I'm a Chinese inventor full of mystery!"

The sound of drums beating surged through the air as Naruko raised a brow.

"Other times, I'm the treasure box within class, a genius mad scientist!"

Another beat of a drum.

"Within the academy, I'm the number genius! Unchallenged by no one!"

This time, a slow upbeat of a drum filled the air as Chao continued, Setsuna holding a bewildered face.

"Outside of class, I'm the boss of the popular Chinese stand franchise, Chao Bao Zi!"

The beating of the drum continued to speed up as Chao gripped her apron, throwing it off her as she yelled, "You ask me for my real identity!? I'll tell you! My real identity is~~~!"

The sound of cymbals clashed as Chao did a mild transformation and transformed into a rather poor form of a stereotypical alien.

"An alien from Mars!"

"What kind of joke is this!?" Setsuna yelled in true tsukkomi fashion, slapping the other girl with a harisen. Chamo face-faulted and landed on Naruko's forehead, the blonde confused by all this. "I don't get it, what's Mars?"

"It's another planet besides Earth, Ane-san…" Chamo answered as Setsuna mentions how there were plenty of other races and human-types within the class. Taking note of the many types of races within their class, Naruko was surprised to hear of vampires and demons. Hell, she wouldn't be surprised if there was a missing princess of a long forgotten kingdom in their class! Giggling at the idea, Naruko thought, as if that'll happen.

… Right?

"Fufufu…" Chao shot back, grinning a rather devilish smirk, "I don't think you have the right to say such thing, Setsuna-chi…"

Setsuna flinched at the sudden intent. Pulling out a rather complicated card with her picture as the center design (where she got it when she was wearing practically nothing, Naruko would never know… though it would make sense that women would always have that weird ability to pack things on their persona even when wearing almost nothing… maybe she should try doing that?), Setsuna quickly threatens, "What are you planning, Chao-san? If you plan on hurting Negi-sensei, I will never forgive you!"

A period of intense pressure settled in.

Not missing a single beat, Chao managed to snicker within her hand. "Wearing such a thing and saying that… not helping with the convincing part of the conversation, Setsuna-chi…!"

"Wha-! Oh be quiet you!"

Watching the two girls exchange words of challenges, ending with Chao saying that she wouldn't lay a hand on Negi, Naruko continued to blink, having completely missed the reason why they were having an argument. However, the way Chao ended the conversation with an interesting proclamation shocked the blonde and her companions.

"Negi-kun is a dear relative of mine. In any way, he's important to me," The Chinese smiled. "I won't hurt him."

"Wha…?"

"Eh?"

Naruko herself was confused with this revelation. According to the information she got from the others who were in the know, Negi was an orphan. His father supposedly dead, his mother missing, no other known relatives besides his cousin, and now, Chao's saying that she's a relative of Negi's? It's like saying that Sasuke had an Uzumaki as a teammate after killing Orochimaru. Hah, what were the chances of that?

"No worries, Setsuna-chi, Naruko-chi, Chamo-chi! Aliens never lie! Trust me!"

Setsuna narrowed her eyes suspiciously. "You…" She muttered, "Who are you…?"

On a completely opposite note, Negi is seen prancing around the restroom, smiling with glee at the spectacular view given to the occupants of the restroom within the blimp.

Note: Ok so, it's another quickie, everyone, YAAAAY!

But to be honest, I just HAD to post this up, after reading the recent NARUTO chapter "Revolution"...

WHAT

THE

FUCK!?

GodDAMMIT, Kishimoto-sensei! Why you troll us all!? It's not good enough that the war is over!? It's not good enough that the goddess/demon is now sealed with her idiotic progenitor of all ninja son!? It's not good enough that Naruto has another heart-felt goodbye with his parent!? It's not good enough that everyone will have a happy ending!?

You just HAD to have Sasuke go with his whole revenge thing and kill the current Kage and change the whole Ninja system!? You just HAD to have Sasuke go all nuts and seal off the Bijū temporarily and fight the only guy in his path!?

WHYYYYYHYHYHYYYYYHYYY!?

(Calms down)

Ok, so... Sasuke powered by Rinnegan versus Naruto with little power from Bijū as well as Senjutsu...

The ultimate showdown! Geez...

On other news...

Some of you guys wanted to know who won the poll for omake.

I could tell you.

I would tell you.

I should tell you.

And I will.

The winner, of the last poll for Omake is~~~ (drum roll please)

Tale of Namikaze Minato!

Now, personally, I wanted Baka Rangers, Assemble!, but alas, not everyone gets what they want. Meh, a guy can dream. I have most of the plot going for this omake anyway... somewhat...

Not to mention, the super duper secret and shall shock the living jibbies out of all of ya! The super secret of Minato and his ancestry bloodline that will be a huge shocker! In fact, call the presses when I post it!

On other news...

As some of you have noticed, I got another poll posted up. It's heavily needed, as a future chapter is heavily depending on it. The Kissing Terminator is ON! Who should Naruto kiss!?

The sexy tsundere schoolgirl, Asuna!?

The bishōjo mage-in-training, Konoka!?

The samurai angel, Setsuna!?

The master of shadows (not really), master stripper, Takane!?

The sweeper of justice, Mei!?

or The Boy Teacher Genius Mage, Negi!?

YOU DECIDE!

Vote now, and you shall get a super duper, awesome special sneak peak look at the new ultimate revolutionary Chō Ōdama Rasen Tarengan worthy new Digimon 2015 coming up equal-worth look of the next story I shall be working!

it's still on the beta stage, but it shall get you all in the eyes and glue it to the screen!

...

just kidding.

TEE HEE!

...

No, seriously, I really will make another story...

STAY TUNE FOLKS!

Buh-Bye