I'm really scared about this chapter... really scared. I think you've all been waiting for this point in the story, and I just hope I've done it as good as I can (it's the longest chapter so far!) I'm not sure whether you'll like how the chapter ends out... but I'll explain my reasons for why I've written it this way at the end. I hope you enjoy it :)

Sometime in the night when the moonlight shimmered in through the translucent curtains, I dreamt. It wasn't a nightmare like I'd experienced so many times before; in fact, it was quite pleasant. My dream switched from Lauren being humiliated to the face of Edward.

But when I was awoken, my eyes staring into the faint dusky darkness of the room, I knew it wasn't morning. I wondered why I'd woken up so early, when I didn't have the need to use the bathroom, and it wasn't the dream; I was tired too, so what had caused me to wake up? Since my sleeping medication, I'd been sleeping well.

But then I heard the voices.

No matter how long I had been apart from it, now matter how long the silence in my mind had slowly eroded away at the memory of the sound, I recognised it instantly. That silkiness in which he spoke, no matter how angry he was; that velvety quality to his tone…

Edward was downstairs. This - lying here with the bedcovers sticking to my skin - wasn't a dream. I knew it wasn't. It was different to every other dream I'd had… because it was just so real.

I lay in bed, ears strained, listening; I tried not to move in case I scared him away, and I kept my breaths as shallow as I could to mimic a sleeping body. Hopefully, I'd keep the all-hearing vampires fooled. Hopefully, they'd be too absorbed in their own conversation to take a moment to pay attention to me.

"Why is Bella here?" Edward hissed. I didn't know whether this was the beginning of the conversation or not… but I did know I'd started listening at a brilliant place.

"Because we had a sleepover," Alice answered nonchalantly.

"Better yet, Alice, why are you here? We made a deal... to stay away, let Bella move on." He paused, before adding, "I heard your plan in Esme's thoughts. She was mortified when she realised she'd let it slip to me. Gods sake, Alice, why?"

"I told you it wouldn't work from the minute you got that idea into your head. I told you, but you did it anyway. You broke her, Edward. She was ill. Mentally ill because of the distress you caused her; do you understand that?"

There was a moments silence before Edward spoke again. I was getting annoyed, the frustration pulsing around within my blood. I was angry that Edward was mad at Alice when she'd helped me so much. I didn't want to think where I'd be now if Alice hadn't been around to help me.

"She would have healed. You didn't have to intervene."

"Do you know, Edward, that I only moved here as a precaution? Just in case?" Alice sounded infuriated. Every word was alight with fury as she spoke, and it shook through the household like wildfire. "Do you know, Mr 'I-know-everything', that Jacob Black, a werewolf friend, visited Bella in the hospital?"

"A werewolf?" He spoke in nothing more than a croak.

"Yes, a werewolf." There was a smacking sound of rock on rock. I wondered if Alice had hit Edward… because I knew Edward wouldn't hit her. "They're a blind spot for me, you know? So Bella completely disappeared from my sight. Thank me later, if you will, but I thought Bella had committed suicide. Was I supposed to stand back then, when I thought her life was in danger?"

"Bella wouldn't. She promised," he said quietly, but he didn't sound convinced.

"Everyone makes promises, Edward. No doubt you made a promise to love Bella for ever?"

"I do love Bella, I always have. You know that."

"That's not what I meant. If you're gonna get all angry at me, Edward, then understand this. You are selfish, self-absorbed and completely oblivious to the pain you've caused others. Not just Bella… no, forget the fact she's on antidepressants because of you, and think about Esme and Carlisle!"

"I feel guilty about that. You know I do."

"So, for god's sake, Edward, do something about it!" Alice shouted.

I shuffled around in my sheets for a moment before lying completely still again, trying to breath normally. Their words echoed around in my head, screeching with truth and realisations, each negative word like a slap to the face.

"Do what?" he said desperately.

"I watched you… I saw you even when I didn't want to. Lying there, all depressed. Thing is, Edward, you could control what happened; Esme and Carlisle didn't have a say in how you were behaving and how they felt because of it. Bella didn't have a say either. I don't understand how my brother can be so blinded and insufferably idiotic and self-centred."

"I left for Bella's safety… it's vital that she lives a normal life."

"It's too late for that now, Edward!" Alice snapped; her voice venomous. "Did you not hear me say that werewolves have been sniffing around her?"

"Jacob Black," Edward snarled.

"Yeah, but you owe him. Because they aren't all. Forks had some visitors."

"Visitors?"

"Laurent and Victoria came for revenge. They didn't see any Cullens about, thought they were lucky, and acted; good job the wolves were here, really, to protect Bella and Charlie, don't you think?" I liked how Alice always drew questions back on Edward, making him think, making him address directly what she was telling him.

"Laurent and Victoria?" His voice was barely audible. I had to strain my ears, and even then it was a very faint mumble.

"For revenge." Alice paused. "I don't think you understand. You've already affected Bella's life too much. Touched her heart, taken it almost. Oh, Edward, you should have seen her. She was – still is - ridiculously thin, practically on snapping point because of exhaustion."

"I never meant for that."

"And then you've already put her in danger. The wolves… just us being here makes more wolves. We've marked her already; she's with the Cullen's. She knows about us. That's a danger magnet in itself. And it's Bella. She encourages danger!"

"It's not funny, Alice."

"Am I laughing?" she replied coolly. "I had to drag Bella out of her shell. I gave her goals and targets and hope. I got her eating, sleeping, talking again. I got her out of the unit; I got her feeling and living again."

"You can't stay here."

"I can, and I will."

"It's not your decision."

"What?" Alice screeched. "Not my decision? Whose is it, Edward? Yours?" She paused. "You aren't fit to make decisions about yourself, let alone make mine. I'd be insane before I gave you that privilege."

"It's unfair on Bella if you stay."

"No, Edward. God, why aren't you listening? It's unfair on Bella if I leave. I promised I'd stay so I'm staying."

"I promised it'd be like I never existed."

"Edward…" Alice's voice had dropped to a quieter volume. "I've never been human, so I can't even recall what it's like. Do you remember being human? Even if you don't, we've lived amongst them for years. Do you honestly believe she'd forget? Honestly?"

"I could hope," he replied quietly.

"You changed when you met Bella, and Bella changed too. She couldn't forget you, and for you to think she could only proves to me how idiotic you are."

"Thanks, Alice," he said dryly.

"Well, it's true, isn't it?"

There was a great silence that lasted a while, making me feel conscious. I heard my own breaths escaping my lungs, and the leaves outside the window where the moonlight still shone against its black canvas. As their silence extended, I was allowed moments in my own thoughts. I kept my breathing as shallow and peaceful as I could.

What would happen now? I felt so angry at him to come back here… listening to him. It was annoyance too; how could such an intellectual vampire be so dumb?

Alice was so convinced he still loved me… and it was true that he seemed heartbroken at the sound of me upset or in danger, but he still didn't want to be here, and he wanted to take Alice with him as he left. It frustrated me that Edward was this way. So self-loathing, as Alice said, but so arrogant. What gave him the right to control us all so much? Where did he get his arrogance to believe he knew what was best for me?

Alice was the next person to speak, breaking me from my own thoughts. I was pleased Edward couldn't hear me.

"So what are you going to do now?"

"I… don't know." He sounded empty. "I don't know what to do for the best. Should I go? Obviously Bella's better now, she's getting better. Maybe… maybe when Bella finds someone else, you can leave her then."

"I'm not leaving her, Edward-"

"I can't give her so many things..." Edward interrupted but Alice talked over the top of him.

"And I don't think you should leave either."

"Why?"

She was silent, for just a second. "Because Bella's awake. You existed to her before, but you're more than just a memory now. She's listening."

My heart stopped in my chest. What? How long had she known? Was this all for my benefit, or my humiliation? I didn't know what to do next, whether to laugh or cry... but I trusted Alice. She knew this would work, surely, if she was so blunt?

"What?" Edward gasped.

Slowly, as if my body was working without my minds permission, I swung my legs out of bed. My feet touched the floorboards and I began walking out of the room. Oh my god, after so long, Edward would finally be within my reach, be within my line of sight.

"Don't you dare leave," Alice hissed.

I felt suddenly conscious of myself; bed hair, too skinny because I hadn't eaten in so long, scruffy pyjamas.

I was angry. In fact, I was furious at him. My footsteps sped up when I realised I could vent this anger, this worthlessness, towards him. Finally, I'd be able to see him, and make him see. If he loved me, then he'd listen. If he didn't, and it'd completely break me if he didn't, then he'd just walk away. Would he leave me again?

As I looked upon the face who had blessed my dreams, Alice sped over to me. She seemed to think I needed encouragement. But all I needed was the assurance she whispered in my ear: "He's staying."

"Bella."

The way that Edward said my name was a musical miracle; it sounded so good there, how it rolled off his tongue perfectly. It made me want to collapse in a fit of tears and hysterical giggles in his arms. But I didn't. I stayed where I was, beside the stairs, watching Edward stand near the couch.

"Edward, I…"

"I'm so sorry, Bella. I'm so sorry!" He sounded as if he was sobbing; it looked like it too, with his chest shaking gently. But how many nights had I sobbed myself to sleep over him? I'd lost so many tears because of how he'd left.

It was Edward's arrogance that had really pissed me off, how he thought he knew best.

"Why, Edward? Why did you leave?" I noticed the shaking of my quiet voice.

"Alice said you heard us?" He sounded doubtful, but Alice shot him a glare. "Because I'm dangerous; if anything happened to you… because of me… because of anyone… it's too painful."

"For who? Painful for whom?"

"Me."

"What about my pain when you left me? Didn't you think about that?" I felt a tear leak down my cheek. I didn't wipe it away in case I drew attention to it, although I was sure his vampire eyes would notice it anyway.

"I thought you'd be okay."

"I could stand here and waste my pathetic mortal life naming every possible name I could think of to describe how stupid you are, Edward Cullen," I hissed, my bottom lip trembling. "I could stand here and call you every name under the sun. Alice has already used some of the ones on the very long list. But I'll just use some, shall I?"

Edward seemed shocked; his eyes widened; his mouth opening and then closing in astonishment. I'd shocked myself, too, for how I was acting now when I'd been waiting for this moment for so long - but I wasn't going to stop now.

"You're arrogant; how could you be so big-headed to think you'd know what is right for me?"

I took a step forwards, my confidence growing at seeing him so speechless. Finally. He was actually listening. He wasn't walking away, just like Alice had said.

"And selfish, too. Did you only think about yourself? I never had to witness Carlisle and Esme first hand like Alice did, but my god, Edward, how could you? You told me yourself how good they've been to you! How could you treat them like that? They're your parents!"

I was getting closer to him with each step, each part of my rant. The idea of Esme suffering, so kind and caring to each one of her children, was impossible to visualise. She must have been hurting so much.

"What about delusional? How did you manage to delude yourself that I'd be better without you, Edward? I don't understand. How long did it take you? Seconds? Minutes? Hours? Did you think about it whilst lying next to me at night, or when you heard my heart beating quicker when I was with you? Did they seem like signs to you that I wasn't completely happy?"

I lashed out, my small hand striking his chest with a dull thud. I hadn't done it hard enough to cause myself, or Edward (of course), any damage. It felt good, as adrenaline coursed through my veins. After so long, I was beginning to see the benefit of talking. Dr. Geller would be proud... only before, I'd been talking to the wrong person. I needed Edward to hear all this.

"Did you succeed? Did you get anything out of leaving me, Edward, other than some kind of self-satisfaction at supposedly doing the right thing? Did it make you happy?"

"Every minute I was away from you, all I felt was the deepest sense of loss and emptiness. I hid away fr-"

"You hid away?" I repeated back to him, swinging my thin arms in the air. "You hid away? Okay. Well, where was my privilege, eh?"

My hand struck his chest again in an angry outburst.

"I had to have people watch me. I had Sam Uley first, find me." I hit him again, but his hand swiftly moved to grasp my wrist and restrain me. I struggled against his gentle, but strong, hold. "Then I had the rest of Forks waiting for me, watching me at my worst. Then Dr. Gerandy examining me. Then Charlie watching me, judging me. Then the people at school, supposed friends and teachers, staring and talking. Then the hospital staff, analysing me."

He pulled my arm down gently, cradling the hand I struck him with gently in his own. His touch was cold, comforting, but cold. I tried to yank it away, not wanting him to touch me right now. How strange… after so long of wanting him there to touch me, hold me... but I needed to get this out in the open first before I lost my train of thought.

His absence hadn't really changed his affect on me; my heart still beat immensely fast in his presence, I still shivered under his glare, and felt giddy at his touch.

"So while you were hiding, Edward, I had people always watching me." The tear tickled my cheek as it fell… and then another, and another. His finger grazed my cheek, wiping away the falling tears with one swift movement.

"I'm so sorry, Bella, so sorry."

I'd forgotten Alice was in the room until she moved over to us and helped me remove my hand from Edward's grip. She looked at my knuckles and we both noticed some light purple bruising from the contact.

"It's not broken," Alice whispered to me, although I hadn't even thought of that. "I would have heard the bone break."

Slowly, Alice pulled me into her. I hugged her small body tightly, grasping onto this vampire who was my protection. She had given me what I had now… some kind of confidence and goal. Everything that I'd achieved was because of her.

I pulled away from her after a few seconds, turning on Edward again. His face was so sunken, I wanted to comfort him. But I didn't. I couldn't just yet… I would, eventually, because I still loved him so much, with every part of my aching body. Just not yet. He needed to know.

"Are you going to leave me again?" I asked quietly.

"I… I don't think I could, even if I wanted to."

I felt myself flinch. "You know, Edward, if you want to go, you don't have to stay. It'd hurt more than you could ever really know, but I told Alice before that I'm not going to be anybody's responsibility anymore."

"You were never my responsibility, Bella."

"You did a real good job of showing me that," I replied snidely.

I always felt like he was the one looking after me. Instead of letting me drop something, he was always catching it. Instead of letting me fail, he was there to show me how to succeed. It was nice, at the time, but looking back at him, all of his actions screamed to me that I was a responsibility to him.

"Bella, I'm so sorry."

As I began to feel the strain of it all, I whispered, "I need to sleep." I was so exhausted, and even more so now, after a mentally draining confrontation. "Will you be gone in the morning?"

"No." He shook his head firmly. "Not unless you want me to go."

"You said you're sorry?" I questioned, half expecting him to take it all back and quickly flee out of the door. Maybe both Alice and Edward would just disappear.

"So sorry, Bella. I hate myself. I don't think I can forgive myself."

"So you're willing to do anything?"

"Anything."

"Sit there," I said, pointing a finger to the chair in the living room. I heard the croak in my voice as I demanded him to do it.

I'd not asked for anything off of him before… but I needed this reassurance that he still cared enough about me. He told me once that I was his life (although I never truly believed it) and I needed to see how true that still was.

Moving over to the couch, I watched as Edward sat in the chair. I reached over and grabbed one of the blankets that Alice had set aside earlier.

"Goodnight," I said quietly, wrapping myself in the blanket and tugging it around myself as a protective layer.

Alice turned the lights off, so the room fell to darkness, but I could still see Edward in the chair opposite me, a dull outline of where he was sitting, and I heard Alice's exaggerated footsteps as she walked up the stairs.

"Goodnight, Bella," he whispered so quietly. "May I… may I tell you something?"

"Tell me what?" I answered warily, fearing the words that would come out of his mouth.

"You might deem it as inappropriate."

"What is it?"

"I… I'm still in love with you, Bella, and I'll never forgive myself for the way I treated you."

I couldn't answer. For a while, we watched each other. I was scared to close my eyes in case he disappeared and I couldn't protest, and he seemed too fixed to remove his eyes from me. I began to shake a little when it all finally hit me that it was real.

Edward was back. Even though it hadn't been his original plan, he was staying too. Or that's what he said, at least.

"Are you cold?" he asked when my eyes started to droop together drowsily.

"No, why?"

"You're shaking. Are you ill?"

"No."

"You should go to sleep, Bella."

"I'll add patronising to the list, as well."

"I'm… I…" but Edward didn't finish his sentence. "You don't believe I'm going to stay, do you?"

"Can you blame me, Edward?" I sighed.

"I'll lie beside you, if it makes you feel better. You always did notice when I was gone, even for a moment."

As much as that idea tempted me, "I… I don't think I can deal with that right now," I said quietly, perching myself up on my elbow. I looked at Edward through squinted eyes, making out his outline. Even that was beautiful.

"Edward, I… I still love you too. Even after everything, I still love you. It's strange, because for so long I've wanted you to come back to me… and now you're here, I'm just so angry."

"I can understand. It's natural for you to feel that way, and I hate that it's my fault."

"I'm going to forgive you. I love you too much not to."

"I love you too, Bella."

Right there, that phrase; he said it with such sincerity that had my heart swelling. It was one of the reasons why I loved him so much, because of how he made me feel, so happy and loved. He was so caring, too. I had to remind myself that.

"Maybe you could sit here?" I asked, pointing to the space on the floor. He was a vampire… it wouldn't be uncomfortable for him wherever he sat.

In a nano-second, Edward was sitting in that exact space where I'd pointed to, his back leaning against the couch. His head was about the same height as my stomach, and he turned his neck to look at me. This was okay… not too close, not too far away.

"Can I talk to you, Bella?"

"Hmm," I agreed nonchalantly.

"I came here tonight because I was angry. I'd found out about Alice's interference in your life through Esme's thoughts when I went to say hello and let them know I was still existing. But then Alice told me about what it was like when I was away. She told me of Laurent and Victoria. I thought you were doing okay. I thought you were healing. I'm sorry, Bella. I came here tonight to try and convince Alice you were better without us. I couldn't have been more wrong."

"Finally…" I said, with a quiet hint of a chuckle.

"I will spend forever making it up to you, Bella."

Gingerly, I pushed my hand out of the confines of the blanket. Fumbling around, I eventually found Edward's smooth hand and brought it up to me. He wasn't dazzling me right now, which was good, because I needed to think things through completely unbiased. I brought my lips to his hand, pressing them gently against his soft skin.

"For now, I'd just be happy if you let me sleep." I tried to smile. I needed to be strong, to stay in some sort of control.

"Okay, I'm sorry. Goodnight, Bella."

"'Night."

In the silence, I applauded myself for remaining so calm. Tomorrow, I would talk to him more.

Maybe I was subconsciously still aware of how Edward's mind worked; he was so set in his decisions. He'd just said he'd spend forever making it up to me, but I didn't have forever. How much did he want to make it up to me? How much did he love me?

Tomorrow, I'd find out just how much. But for now, I couldn't resist the dreams that called for me, and I slept the best night's sleep I ever had with Edward's hand securely in mine. Even though I acted like I just had, I was still putty in Edward's hands. I just couldn't let him know it just yet.

I really thought this was the best way for Bella and Edward to be reunited, although it took me a long time for me to decide it this way. I wrote it the way I have because I could feel Bella's anger. She's so frustrated at him for being arrogant and thinking he knew what was best - that's what Bella is angry about, which is why she's being a bit short. Also, I think she's trying to remain a little distant from him in case he wanted to leave again. Anyways, next chapter will explain a lot more!

I would really appreciate your thoughts on this chapter... I really like it. Do you? Please review :)

Thanks for reading xx