From the Journal of Sarah Miller
I sat on a bench in a adjacent room moments later. I had ran outside after the fight and had my head against the wall with one hand braced against it while the other pinched my nose to stem the blood flow. I would spit out a glob of blood every so often. I don't know if the blood was coming from my chest or it was dripping down the nasal passage into my throat. Either way, it was annoying. The scent of blood clung to my nostrils just as much as it did to the inside of my nose. The taste of copper was in my mouth and the back of my throat.
Both Kate and Matt found me crying my eyes out. It hurt though. I kept coughing and spitting out blood. The cool air outside is what made things easier for me to breath. If I was still inside in that muggy building, I would have a lot harder time breathing. That was for damn sure.
My face managed to feel stung and numb at the same time. For one minute, it felt like someone was smacking me repeatedly in my face. The next, I didn't feel anything.
It was a good thing that Kate and Matt found me when they did. I passed out after they were escorting me back into the building. Kate would later tell me that Matt had carried me inside and they lay me down on a mat that wasn't being used. Matt had some background in medicine since he was a paramedic before becoming a part of the CIA. It would explain why he was at the testing.
They woke me up using ammonia. I had sat up abruptly. I didn't remember passing out before that or getting any reason that I was about to. They both had lay a comforting hand on my shoulder before laying me back on the mat.
"Just relax" Matt had assured me before he took a flashlight and flashed it into my eyes. I squinted and turn my face away. "Relax" He had said softly as he gently cupped my chin and had me face him. "I need to look at your eyes."
He had wanted to see if they were dilated. They had looked fine. They helped me to where I was currently sitting. They gave me paper to stem the blood flow. Kate got an ice pack since my eye looked bruised. Matt had me be on a breathing apparatus to help me with my asthma. Also, if I was still having trouble breathing, he wanted me to go to the medical ward.
I was off the breathing apparatus now. My nose stopped bleeding. It was stuffy though. I still had the ice pack on my eye. Eventually, Kate and Matt went back to the ring where the initates were fighting. I sat there in that room by myself with self doubt. I wondered if I made a mistake. I closed my eyes and fresh tears came out. Of course, I did.
A while later, Matt returned to my side. He knelt down in front of me, and checked my nose to see if it was broken. It wasn't.
"How are you doing?" He asked me curiously.
"I could be better." I replied softly.
He took the ice pack from me and inspected my eye. "It is going to be black and blue."
"Great" I said sarcastically. I took a deep breath. "Can I ask you something?"
"You wonder if you made the right decision in joining Dauntless." He guessed.
My mouth dropped. "How did you know that?" Was this man psychic or something?
He looked up at him. His brown (or black?) eyes stared into mine and I felt like I was falling into them. They were intense, and soon I wanted to look away in fear I would fall too far. "It's written all over your face."
"Oh, so it's apparent then?"
"It's very apparent." He pointed out. "So, do you think you made the right decision?"
"What do you think?"
"I don't know. That's why I'm asking you."
"There is a part of me that feels like I made a mistake." I admitted reluctantly to him. "The other part of me feels free now."
He stood up and sat down beside me. "Let me ask you this" He began. "If you had to choose again, what would you pick?"
"Dauntless" I said without hesitation.
He smirked at me. "Seems like you have an answer to your question." He remarked. He put a hand on my shoulder. "Look, you've only been training for a week. You all are getting a crash course in ten weeks versus months that we in the military had. Be patient"
"So, you think I have what it takes to make it in Dauntless?" I inquired, sounding a bit hopeful.
"After how I saw you dodge Patty? Yeah" He smiled at me. A curious expression crossed his face. "Where did you learn to dodge like that?"
"I was quite good at dodge ball." I explained. "My class called me the Artful Dodger."
His smile widened. "I bet. You looked beautiful and graceful out there."
Wha-? "You think I'm beautiful and graceful?" I asked softly, my voice sounding oddly far off.
"Yes" He replied. He wrapped an arm around me and drew me closer to him. He leaned his head down and closed his eyes. I closed my eyes too. And that's when I passed out again
Or maybe it was sometime before that. Matt and I about to kiss seem like a dream. Or maybe it did happen? I don't know. I need to sleep now. I will talk about this later when I'm less concuss..