Harry was sitting in the window seat in the den looking out at the street, windows charmed so no one could look in but they could see out. He could hear his dad and brother playing chess behind him. He wasn't sure why he was in the room. He hadn't wanted company but then again he worried if he was alone, he might have to see Severus and that scared him.

It wasn't the kiss that scared him. It wasn't the fact the man was his father's best friend, his brother's godfather and his professor. It wasn't that he was angry at the thought of being kissed by the man. He had no idea how he felt.

He was lost in his thoughts when he felt a hand on his shoulder. "Harry, is there something wrong?"

Harry looked up at his father. "No. I guess was I was just lost in my thoughts father."

Lucius wasn't so sure but he didn't seem to want to press the matter. "I have to go out for a bit Harry. You know Draco could use someone to play chess with."

Harry nodded and stood up. He hugged his dad. "Thank you father."

Lucius was still trying to get used to his new son's constant need to thank everyone for the simplest things. "No thanks needed for anything Harry. I'll see you later."

Draco was sitting at the chess board and was setting up the players. Harry had a feeling his brother liked to play chess with him because Harry was the only one in the house that Draco knew he'd beat every time. Lucius and Remus took playing chess to a whole new level and even Severus gave Draco a run for his money.

Draco looked up and smiled. "You don't have to play if you don't want Harry. Though it might be nice to have someone I can beat."

Harry laughed and took a seat across from him. "You never know, with all of this practice I am getting from you and father, I might actually beat you one day."

Draco shot him an odd smirk. "I won't hold my breath on that one little brother."

Harry added his own smirk as he worked on his first move. "Little Brother? I am only six weeks younger then you are Draco. You make me sound like a kid."

Really Harry liked the term, the affection behind it. He was starting to see Draco more and more like his brother. Draco might not have had the age difference that there was with Harry and the Weasley brothers but in many ways Draco was a big brother. Ron was three months older but would never be classified as a big brother.

"You know father was worried about you. You were so quiet." Draco admitted.

Harry looked up to see concern etched in his brother's face. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to worry either of you."

Draco sighed. "Harry we love you and we don't mind being worried about you. It's what families do. We just wish you'd let us help you when you are."

Harry had no idea how he was supposed to tell his brother that he had almost been kissed by Severus. Or how to tell him that he had actually nearly allowed the man to kiss him. Or to explain that it wasn't Severus that made him pull away.

Harry looked up at his brother as they were playing. "Draco. You knew that I was gay before this, right?"

Draco looked up a bit surprised. "I did. You know even if father and dad weren't together I'd have no problem with it Harry. You'd still be my little brother."

Harry was grateful."I'm scared. After what happened. I'm scared I'll never be comfortable allowing another man to touch me. I'm scared I'll spend my life alone."

Draco stood and came around. "You will Harry. When you find someone who loves and you know you can trust, you will. You will find someone to heal you."

Harry shook his head. "No. I mean why would anyone want to be with me after what I have done Draco? I wouldn't even want to be with me."

Draco pilled his brother into his arms. "Harry, you will find someone I promise. You'll find someone who sees you for who you are and who will love you."

He tried to pull back from his brother. "I'm sorry I dumped this on you. I've tried not to. I tried to tell just our dads. I didn't want to bother you with any of this."

Draco wasn't letting go. "You're my brother and I want to help you. If you need someone to talk to, I'm here or you just want chess or quidditch, I'm here as well."

Harry and Draco went back to their game of chess but Harry was relieved a bit for talking with his brother. He needed his father or dad for the rest. He had no idea how to broach the subject of Severus with either man but he wouldn't lay that on his brother. No matter what Draco had said.

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Lucius came back before dinner time and he found his old friend standing in the den and knew something was bothering him. They had been best friends since their first year at Hogwarts and Lucius was good at reading his friend's moods.

"Sev? What is going on?" he asked as he entered the room.

Severus turned around to look at him. "I think I need to head back to school tomorrow Lucius."

Lucius was surprised. "You're worried about Albus and the school or is there something else you're not telling me?"

Severus sighed. "I did something really stupid tonight Luc. I don't think I should be around you and your family right now."

Lucius was growing scared. "What happened Sev? Remus and I know you would never harm either of us or our boys. I think you're over reacting."

"I tried to kiss your son tonight. Now do you think I am over reacting?" Severus said.

Lucius stared at him in shock. "You tried to kiss my son? That is why Harry was so quiet when he came down. He stopped you?"

Severus nodded. "I didn't really get far and I'm not sure what happened but Harry ran from the room."

Lucius sunk into a chair. "Why? I mean why were you trying to kiss my son Sev? I need an answer before I decide to hex off your balls where you stand."

Severus shook his head. "I deserve for you to hex me Luc. I'd expect no less. I'm a guest in your home and I am trying to kiss your underage son."

Lucius stopped him. "I know you better then this Sev. I know you'd never force my son or any other student into anything. Please just talk to me."

"I have been working with him so closely and I have been drawn to him. The fact that he was your son or my student didn't occur to me. I just had to kiss him."

"You know after all my son has gone through he can't take any games Sev. Even if you weren't my age, I'd say the same. Harry can't take being hurt right now."

Severus looked at his friend in surprise. "You're not going to hex me for trying to kiss Harry?"

Lucius smirked. "No. I know you'd never try to force yourself on my son and while the age difference is staggering and you're his teacher, I can understand."

Severus gaped at him as if he had just grown two heads. "Did you just give me permission to actively pursue your son?"

Lucius laughed. "I didn't say that. But Harry needs love. Not just love of his family. And if you want to give him that, then I could not really argue that."

Severus walked over and poured a tumbler of bourbon. "I swear to you Luc that if this went further, I'd not hurt him. I care about him a lot. This isn't lust."

Lucius nodded. "I know. You've never been one for simple lust. If Harry is interested, I'd not be opposed. At his age it isn't against school policy either."

Severus still wasn't sure his best friend wasn't under the imperius curse. "Are you just setting me up so your husband can tear me to pieces Luc?"

Lucius actually snorted at that. "I think Remus may take some convincing but I mean it. It's going to be hard for Harry to open his heart to anyone and let a man come near him physically again other then me and his dad. If you can be the one to make Harry trust a man's touch again, then I would be happy for you."

Severus pulled his friend into a hug. "You know I never realized how lucky I was in a friend like you Luc. I promise no matter what, never to hurt either your sons."

Luc hugged him. "That is the only reason I'd ever say this is okay Sev. But I promise best friend or not, you hurt him and I will lock you in with moony next month."

Severus knew how serious his friend was. "I promise, no matter what, I won't give you a reason to lock me in a room with Moony. Remus is scary enough when it comes to his sons."

Lucius watched as his friend left the room. He was starting to think he had lost his mind like Severus thought. He had actually given his best friend permission to pursue his sixteen year old son. Remus was going to have him on the couch for a year if he didn't demand a divorce. Lucius just hoped he had been right.

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Severus had been hoping to find Harry but he seemed to be avoiding him after dinner but just before he headed to bed he heard a knock on his door and when he opened the door Harry was standing there.

"Harry. I'm sorry about this afternoon." Severus tried.

Harry looked pale as he seemed to just notice they were in his bedroom. "I wanted to talk to you but..."

Severus steered him towards the sitting room. "Here. I am happy to talk to you Harry. I've been worried you wouldn't talk to me after this afternoon."

Harry didn't look up. "I didn't, I mean I wasn't bothered by you trying to kiss me. I mean with it being you. I was just..."

"Scared? Harry after everything you have gone through this summer, I can't blame you for being scared. Harry, you need to know I'd never pressure you."

Harry finally looked up. "I don't understand why you'd want to kiss me in the first place."

"It doesn't matter to me that you're younger and at your age it isn't against school policy. The reactions of your fathers scare me to death but I really care for you."

Harry shook his head. "I mean why would you want to kiss me? I am nothing but a dirty whore. After what I did for my Uncle, why would you ever want me?"

Severus pulled him close as gently as he could. "You're no such thing. You're Uncle forced you. You didn't ask for it, you weren't willing, you are no whore Harry."

Harry was sobbing. "No. I responded. My body responded. I..."

Severus realized what Harry was saying. "Harry, our bodies respond to things our minds fight. Just because your body was stimulated doesn't mean you wanted it or you were participating. Harry, no one could have fought what you went through. "

Harry's tears slowed a bit. "I don't know if I can ever let anyone touch me. I feel so dirty. I know what you and my dads say, but it doesn't change how I feel."

Severus held him close. "Let me show you. I'll be gentle and slow as you need. Let me show you that you can trust someone to love you Harry."

Harry didn't respond but when Severus gently tilted his head up to meet his and gently pressed his mouth against Harry's lips, Harry didn't pull away. He didn't return the pressure but he stayed put. As Severus pulled away he knew it was a start. He reminded himself that even if it wasn't for that summer, Harry was just turning sixteen and this would still be a bit new.