Trish took a step forward towards the rowing Giorno. "Come on. You got like, 24 more steps- OH SHIT, I MEAN 23! 23! NOT 4!" Mista said, having a little panic attack.
Trish ignored him and gulped.
Her imagination was against her.
"Oh? You're approaching me? After falling out, you had the nerve to break the ice?" imagination Giorno said.
"I can't do it!" Trish exclaimed.
..
"Row..! Row..! Row your weight..! Violently down the..! Gym..! Merrily- Merrily! Merrily..! The goal is her pussy..! Hah..." Giorno panted as he finished his set.
He shook his head and stared at his hands. "Oh no... I'm becoming like my padre..."
...
"So you wanna beg for parole or something?" Dio asked.
"No. I want to work my body here as much as possible and come out as a majestic bodybuilder!" Polpo said. "But you're sentenced 25 to life, you stupid bastard."
...
Giorno wiped his sweat off as he got out of the locker room holding his bag. He was about to go home. "Hey Mista! Hey... Trish. I'll see you guys around." Giorno waved goodbye.
"A-Ahh... Yeah." Trish replied.
Mista saw how dejected Trish looks and decided to play the ultimate wingman. "Hey Giorno! Trish has something to tell you- AAACK!"
"It's nothing! You know how Mista is! Being a jackass is his specialty." Trish laughed nervously while their friend lie down on the floor writhing in pain after getting hammerfisted in the balls.
Giorno raised an eyebrow but didn't say a word before leaving.
...
His body aches as he finished his salad. Opening up his laptop, what should he do?
Continue reading Joseph Joestar: Hamon Huntsman? (I don't want russy to sue me, sorry lol)
Watch dog videos? (cat vids are overrated)
Search about fitness tips?
"What's this?" Giorno raised an eyebrow as he saw a post in his social media feed.
"Hurricane Tarkus, ETA 5 hours?! What the hell?!" the blonde cussed, the weathermen weren't doing their jobs right once again. He decided to share it and tagged his uncle JoJo to let give him a heads up that he won't be coming tomorrow, also to prepare for the bad weather.
...
"On the road again. Can't wait to get on the road again..." Dio sang as he drived across the deserted road, why did they have to incarcerate Polpo in a county jail two cities away from home?
But it felt nice, that he had another stupid person under his thumb. Dio is a control freak, anyone who was inspired by him was seen by the man himself as an underling.
...
He watched in horror as the busty blonde lay unconcious. "Yang! Oh fuck!"
Giorno scrolled down alittle to continue.
"Wake up! Please..." Joseph grabbed her wrist to check for a pulse. Nothing. He layed his head on her chest in an attempt to determine if her heart still beats. "Huh. Damn her tits are really sof- I CAN'T HEAR ANYTHING, FU-HU-HU-HU-CK!" the brunet panicked.
Giorno teared through one of his dad's 'MUSCLE CHIPS'
They look very tasty and since it's a part of Dio's diet, Giorno figured it'll help his progress.
"Yang, look, you're gonna be okay, okay? Come on, you're a tough bimbo, you survived worse than this! You're not even bleeding!" he received no reply. "WAKE UP BLONDIE, THIS ISN'T FUNNY."
"... Is she actually going to die?" Giorno mumbled before taking a bite. "PFFFT, BLEGH! Dios mio! It tastes exactly like the supplement powder!" he exclaimed.
"Please wake up... I can't- I can't live without you." Joseph grasped her hand and gripped it firmly.
"Is that soooo?" he heard her cheeky, teasing voice. "OH YOU SNEAKY SHI-"
...
"What is wrong with the sky?! Why is it dark?" Dio saw the clouds gettting darker. "Oh right... It's almost night time. Silly me." he chuckled. "Hmm?" he saw a car behind him trying to overtake his.
"No!" he said as he blocked it's way. The car beeped as he heard faint shouting.
He laughed like an evil bastard but then the car decided to attempt once again.
"MOVE, I GOTTA SHIT!" he heard the driver scream. "FOLLOW THE RULES OF THE ROAD, I'M A GODDAMN LAWYER!" he yelled back and blocked it again. The car swerved off road and hit a cactus.
"HAHA! EAT A DICK! No one is allowed to break the law BUT ME!" Dio cheered as he saw a truck in front of him with half a mind of overtaking it.
...
"Calisthenics, huh?" Giorno muttered with interest. 'So that's what pushups are for.'
Bodyweight exercises, done without any weights, can be done anywhere there is space, floor or air. He stood up in excitement "This is perfect! Since it's going to rain alot tomorrow, I can instead do bodyweight exercises at the comfort of my home!"
His notification bar dinged though.
"What the..." Giorno gulped in fear. Jolyne was planning on working out at Jonathan's Beef Palace. "This is insanity! I'm... I'm not ready to show myself to her!" he paced back and forth. 'Calm down, Giorno... Calm down. A Joestar never panics.'
He sat back down and decided to do something he haven't done for a while...
...
Dio entered the house silently. Usually, he loves screaming his lungs out as he entered his humble abode but he figured it would be nice to scare his stupid kid for a change. He tiptoed up the stairs, he was a petty thief before George adopted him so he is confident with his ability to sneak around even with his large frame.
"Nnn... Ruby... Ahhh, Sayori..!" he raised an eyebrow as he walked closer to his room.
...
Giorno was currently fapping to RWBY and Doki Doki Literature Club rule 34 when suddenly...
"WANKER!"
"GAAAAH!" he screamed as he was given a split second to choose.
A. Cover your cock
B. Close the tab
So he did both. He covered his dick by putting it in the keyboard and closing the laptop.
"You piece of shit! Don't you know that ejaculating makes you lose testosterone?! Less testosterone, less muscle!" Dio lectured. "I will only excuse you busting a nut if you're slaying mad pussy, and last time I checked, HUMAN HANDS HAVE NONE!"
"Okay pa, I'm sorry!" Giorno apologized.
"And seriously?! Ruby Rose is 15 you sick fuck! You're lucky I'm your father or else you'd be Polpo's prison bitch by now!"
"Bu-"
"And Sayori is a corpse! Fucking hell, you're not just a pedo, you're also a necrophile!" Dio angrily berated him as he walked back to his room.
Giorno calmed down as he pulled his pants up. Dio returned and doused him with holy water.
"He-Heyt! Quit it!" the boy protested. "Begone, you fucking demon possessing my son's body and fist fight me! Unless you're a succubus then I'll bang you." the man ranted as he continued to splash his kid with holy water.
"Padre! I thought you were a athiest! What are you doing?!" Giorno covered himself with a blanket.
"Oh. Well Father Pucci told me that it's fun dousing people with holy water." Dio said as he stopped. "But seriously?! Rule 34?! With all the porn in the whole world, you're fapping in front of a picture. It's like being offered a fucking Bugatti and you chose a shitty skateboard." Dio proceeded to berate his son about masturbating to pictures of anime girls.
"Listen, Giorno. Hentai exists because a piece of paper can't say no like a real woman. You don't have to ask a drawing for consent." the blonde man lectured. Giorno remained silent but he agreed. But something bugged him "Wait, then how did you know who Ruby Rose and Sayori are? Do you watch RWBY or play Doki?"
Dio tensed up at the question before sighing. "I used to be a lost cause like you, fapping to anime girls. But then I realized the error of my ways."
Giorno was surprised "I... Those two only came out this decade, when did you exactly realize the error of your ways, Pa?"
Dio cleared his throat and turned his back on his son before replying "Yesterday."
Sorry for the other series references, I just couldn't resist referencing my Xover works lmao.