This chapter felt a bit rushed to me.

Let me know what you guys think.

Enjoy!

Chapter Fourteen

Mending Bridges

Noah entered the house followed by Lily. She was helping him with his coat when he turned towards her. He tried to speak, but his was so nervous. It was one thing to tell your friends how you are, but to tell your boyfriend's/adoptive mom how you are feeling is quite another.

"Mrs. Snyder? Can we talk now?"

"Noah, you can call me Lily," she insisted as she took his arm. Noah blushed with embarrassment. He was nervous and when he got nervous his manners overcompensated. "Do you want to eat first?"

"Not really hungry,"

"Ok, why don't we sit on the sofa? Is that ok?"

"Sure," he was able to get out. The lump in his throat was getting bigger as he went. She helped him walk around the end table and to the sofa. Noah pretty much had the entire house memorized, but she liked to help him and Noah didn't have the heart to correct her. Once they were settled in, Lily waited for him to start.

"Ok. Um, well, first I want to thank you. I know I made a big fuss and fought you at first, but the truth is, I might not be here if it weren't for you and Damian. So thank you," that was the easy part. Lily was about to open her mouth to say something when Noah continued. "Oh, and I'll thank Damian too, but later. Is that ok?"

"That would be fine honey," she said and could not help but smile. Noah's heart swelled when she used endearments like honey or sweetheart. He went without them for so long, that he was really starting to need them on an almost daily basis.

"Ok. I'm sorry,"

"For?"

"For everything. For the way I treated everyone. Especially Luke. I'm sorry that I hurt your son. I never meant to, not really. And that whole thing on Christmas Eve was an accident, I never or would ever hurt Luke like that, no matter how angry I was or what was going on. You have to know that. I need you to know that. He is so important to me," Noah rushed out. He couldn't stop the words from coming out; like tearing off a band-aid. Lily could not help but reach out and hold his face in her hands. She could feel him shake slightly as she did so.

"I know that Noah. I do," she was said in a soft voice. She brushed her thumbs across his cheeks, just like Luke does. That gesture, not matter how unintentional, unnerved him slightly. He pulled her hands away and held them tightly in his. Their hands interlocked and they held tight for comfort.

"Good. I have been talking to Dr. Johns' and she encouraged me to be open with the people in my life. I just wanted you to know. The reason I was so hard on Luke was all me. I was pushing him away. I couldn't leave him, so I wanted him to leave me. I felt like I was pulling him down with me and he deserves so much more than that," Noah explained. Lily again wanted to disagree with him, but Noah cut her short. "Before you say anything, I know that Luke would not see me that way, but that's how I see me, so to speak," he let out a nervous chuckle and continued. "Thing is, I was angry, very angry, but there was no one to blame or be angry at. So, I chose the next best thing. I chose the one person who stood by me and would never leave. He became my punching bag, whether I meant it or not. And it..it kills me that I broke his heart," Noah managed to get out before he started to cry. His voice had been beginning to constrict as he spoke, but as he got to end, he voice betrayed him. There was no way he could say anything now.

He had been fighting it off for the entire conversation, but he just let go. Lily leaned forward and wrapped her arms around his shoulders and pulled him to her. It was at this moment that Noah realized that he had not really cried over all of this. Sure , he cried after he found out he was blind and after Luke left, but to really let the sorrow of everything break free from his heart and sink away. That he had not done and it was greatly overdue. He let it all go; like releasing his grip to a high ledge. He left himself fall and feel the grief that he had been holding at bay. Lily was just there for him, like any mother would be. He rested his forehead on her shoulder and she rubbed wide circles on his back.

Neither one knew how long they had been sitting there like that, but Damian coming home brought them back to the present. They pulled apart and Noah quickly brushed the tears away from his eyes. Damian left very out of place. He knew he was interrupting something. He wondered if he should leave the room or even the house. Lily left Noah on the sofa and met her husband at the door. She gave him a quick kiss and pulled him into a hug.

"How was your day?"

"Good. Is everything all right here?" He asked as he looked from his wife to Noah and then back again.

"Yeah. Everything is fine," Lily quickly jumped in.

"Yeah, ah Damian, can I talk to you?" Noah asked and then got up to meet his adoptive father. He used his cane to get as close to him as he felt comfortable. He was trying to make amends, but things were still tense.

"Of course Noah, whenever and whatever you want to talk about,"

"Well, I wanted to say thank you. For taking the responsibility for me, when I couldn't. I know how hard I made it and, and I'm grateful that you did," Noah said as he rung his cane in his hands.

"Noah, there is nothing to thank me for. I would make the same decision again, in a heartbeat. You mean a great deal to me and my family,"

"All the same, I owe a thank you and an apology. I'm sorry for the way I treated you…about the whole Mason situation. It maybe could have been handled differently and I really wish the outcome had been different, but I understand now that you were just doing what you thought was right. To protect me and Luke," it took a lot for those words to come out. He really did believe what he was saying, but to actually say them out loud to the man, was different. Damian had to take a breath to keep himself from getting choked up. He had wished that things with Noah were not this tight tug-of-war, but maybe now they could mend this and get back to how things were before Mason even entered their lives.

"Thank you. What you just did took a lot of courage and I am very proud of you. I'm sorry also, for not talking to you or Luke before I went to the Dean. I will always regret what happened," Lily stood in between her two boys and was overflowing with pride and love for them. Noah and Damian may not have the kind of relationship that Noah and Holden have, but at least they appeared to be trying. Noah extended his hand and Damian happily took it. They shook hands and Lily could not help get a bit choked up, but she kept it to herself.

"Well, I'm really tired. I'm going to go to bed. We have to be at the hospital at 5:30 tomorrow morning," Noah remarked and turned to go upstairs.

"Do you want or need anything?" Lily asked.

"No, I'm just worn out. Good night,"

"Good night. Uh, Noah wait," Lily caught him before he left the living room. He turned back towards her and waited. "Why the conversation? Why today?"

"I have surgery tomorrow. You never know what could happen," he said in a guarded tone before he turned, but turned back to say no more thing. "I still don't want Luke to know, about any of this. I'm asking you both to not say anything. Please,"

"Ok," Lilywalked over to him and lightly brushed his sweater across his chest. "I may not agree with keeping this a secret, but if you want us to not tell him, we won't,"

"Thank you," Lily stood on her tip-toes and gave him a peck on the cheek. Noah suddenly felt very self-conscious and retreated to his bedroom. He closed the door and walked to his bed. The room was so quiet. He never realized how quiet a house can be. He could still hear house noises; heater turning on, fan in the bathroom down the hall, house settling. Those he heard, but at night, when everyone was asleep, it was so quiet, all he could do was think. It was like that now. With the kids living at the farm indefinitely, it was just him, Lily, and Damian. Not exactly a wild bunch. He lay back and listened, but with nothing to hear, he started to think.

Which led to Luke.

Noah reached for his bedside table and picked up his cell.

"Call Luke," he said into his cell and waited. He waited for the voice that made his inside melt. The voice that always put a smile on his face. The voice that answered the phone.

"Hello?" Luke didn't even look to see who called him.

"Uh, hi Luke," he winced after the words came out. He sounded like he did when they first became friends. Nervous and a bit dorky.

"Hi Noah," Luke said back, he was breathless. Noah had called him.

"How are you?" Noah pushed himself up and leaned against the headboard.

"Good, tired, but good. You?"

"I'm fine. Why are you tired?" Noah inquired.

"Work. I've been busy covering a local election here,"

"Sounds important," Noah was fidgeting.

"Well, it's different, but I am really liking it," Luke volunteered and then they both grew quiet. Both of them wanted to say so many things, but didn't want to overstep. Hell, they didn't know what "they" were anymore.

"I miss you," Noah's mouth spoke without checking with his brain. He could hear Luke gasp just slightly.

"I miss you too. SO much," Luke said in that butter soft voice that always curled Noah's toes. Noah dubbed it his "bedroom voice". He knew he had to get off the phone. He had to get off the phone before he said too much.

"I just wanted to call and make sure that you were all right. I better go, I'm real tired and I have a big day tomorrow," he bit his tongue after the words came out. After making sure that Lily and Damian didn't say, he goes and almost spills the beans.

"Oh, ok. I, ah, I'll talk to you later then. Make sure that you take care of yourself, ok. Or I'll have to come home and make sure you do," Luke said with a laugh.

Please come home.

"Yeah, good night," Noah said and quickly snapped his phone shut. He felt it, that familiar pull in his chest. That pull that got tighter when he thought about Luke. Like the air was being pulled from his lungs and squeezing his heart.

The next morning Noah lay in his hospital bed and listened to the bustling around him. Even at 7 in the morning, the place was hopping. He could hear nurses at the station outside his door gossiping about the new pediatrician on the third floor. There was a mom telling her son that his cast was going to come off in plenty of time before summer came. He also heard Lily and Damian talking to the doctor before he joined Noah in his room.

"Good morning Noah. How are you?"

"I'm a little anxious Dr. Pierce,"

"Well, Noah I'd be worried if you weren't. But my staff and I know exactly what we are doing and you will in and out in no time. Ok?" He lightly rubbed Noah shoulder to comfort the younger man. Noah let out a deep breath and relax into his gurney. He was suddenly glad that he had been instructed to not eat before hand, he would not have been able to keep anything down. "Ok, Noah, Carrie here is going to take you into the OR and I will meet you there,"

"Noah, we will be here when you get out, ok?" Lily said as she lightly kissed his forehead. Noah could only nod in response.

Noah could see the light changes around him. He passed some windows and then entered another room. He could feel the linoleum tiles under the gurney's wheels. It swayed slightly as they moved, almost like being rocked.

They came to a stop and he waited.

He could hear people moving around him.

He felt an IV being inserted.

He heard door swish open and his doctor's voice.

"All right Noah, I'm right here. Dr. Young, the anesthesiologist, will be helping you relax and when you wake up, you'll be back in your room," he said and then nodded to the other doctor.

"Ok, Noah. I want you to breathe in real deep and count down from ten for me," said Dr. Young.

Ten

Nine

Eight

Seven; Noah's mind drifted to Luke's face.

Six; that smile he had when he came home from Rome.

Five; the last fight they had.

Four; he forgot what number came next.

I love you Luke.

And he was asleep.

Sorry if Lily came off a bit corny. I miss Martha's Lily and I can't help but write Lily corny with Noelle stuck in my mind.

Hit the review link! I want to hear from you guys!

Thanks for stopping by!