Chapter 14:
Jake, Quil and I were working on setting up the bread and meat layouts on the trays. I had to keep smacking Quil's hands to keep him from eating a good portion of the food.
"Quil, keep your paws off that food." I said smacking his hand about the fifth time from pulling about a handful of turkey, ham, and cheese. I saw Jacob laugh as I said that. We heard the other cars park across the street.
"I guess the cavalry is here." Jake said.
We walked outside and noticed four cars and a SUV parked across the street. That would really make little room for cars to get by on our narrow road. Everyone gout out of the cars almost at the same time, making me a bit nervous noticing just how many people were coming to my birthday party. I had never really had a big birthday party like this since I was a little kid. I was excited, at least everyone here I knew and we all got along.
"Hi Bella!" Emily said as she ran up to me on the top of the stairs and gave me a hug.
"Happy birthday!"
"Thanks." I said hugging her back. Sam was behind her and my dad had opened the door for everyone.
"Sam." Charlie greeted.
"Hey Charlie." He shook his hand. Everyone walked inside and it made me question the size of our house. Paul walked up to me and handed me a bottle of Smirnoff vodka with a ribbon tied around it.
"Happy birthday Bella. This is from all of us."
"Wow Paul, a whole bottle of vodka for me. I think this may last probably.. well.. YEARS." He chuckled.
"Well, least you know you can always grab a drink when you need one."
"Well, thanks." I gave him a reassuring smile and walked into the kitchen and placed it in the cabinet.
The gigantic boys were mostly between the kitchen and the porch. I was sitting with Jacob, enjoying having everyone around me. I didn't care about presents or anything, it just felt good to have everyone around me as one big group of friends. I then noticed someone missing, well two missing, but one surprised me.
"Hey, where's Leah and Seth?"
"Well, Leah is.. well Leah but Seth, he's gonna be here a bit later, he's bringing a date." I saw Jacob's eyes dart back and forth between Embry and Paul as they answered me. I was surprised I thought if anything his mom would have him locked up and not dating anyone til he was older. Seth only turned sixteen a few months ago so he was the youngest of the pack. His mom was very protective of her son, regardless of how much of a hero he had been that day in the newborn vampire battle.
"A date? Does his mom approve?" They looked at each other, then Paul answered.
"His mom doesn't really have a say in it, seeing as she's his imprint."
"Oh." was all I could say. I felt dread and worry crawl inside me about Jake, about that nightmare. I couldn't help it, but I had to hide it, I couldn't break down right now. I shook the thoughts out of my head. I thought to myself that this would be a time for a drink.
"I'm gonna get something to drink." I said, getting up and going to the kitchen. I opened the cabinet and prayed my dad wasn't seeing this. I grabbed the bottle of vodka and opened it I poured enough to fill a third of the glass. I pulled out our cranberry juice from the fridge and added another half then put a few ice cubes in to top it off. Well, least I knew if store clerk didn't work for me I could maybe learn to be a bartender.
I took a sip and and puckered at the taste. Yea, way too much vodka I thought. I still sipped it down, feeling the burn in my throat. I noticed Emily watching me from the corner of the room with Sam. Him and Emily walked up to me with concern on their face.
"Bella are you alright?" Sam asked.
"Yea, I'm good." I said taking another swig of my drink, making a face in the process. I noticed Sam's lip turn up, giggling at the face I made. It would've made me laugh at any other time, but this time nothing really seemed funny.
"I think I just need some air." I said as I walked past them and went out the backdoor to the porch and sat on the step. I looked into the night sky. I took another swig of my drink and puckered again as it went down my throat.
"Bella? Are you alright?" I heard Emily's voice behind me.
"I'm fine.." I said looking down.
"Come on Bella, it's just me, we can have girl talk." She was right, She must've told Sam to stay inside although he seemed just as concerned as Emily.
"I heard from Paul about Seth imprinting..." I trailed off.
"I wish Paul wouldn't have been so blunt with you about it."
"It's okay, I'm glad for Seth, he deserves it."
"Then why do you seem so upset about it?" I took another swig and didn't look into her eyes. It must've dawned on her then.
"Ah, you're worried about Jacob..." She knew this wasn't easy for me to talk about. She saw how me and Jacob were at times without Paul or even Sam around. We would stop by at Emily's sometimes to help out making food for the whole pack at times. She saw how we looked at each other, and how I always tried to distance myself, but if any of them understood, it would be Emily.
"Are you worried that he won't imprint, or that he will?" she asked curiously.
"Both to be honest." I said, downing the rest of my drink in a gulp. I finally let go of my worries and just spilled everything out.
"I don't want him to imprint. I know it sounds selfish. If he does imprint, I'll be forgotten about and left behind.."
"Jacob would never do that to you Bella.." She put her hand on my shoulder.
"You think that, but what if he imprints on someone else? He won't even give me a second look."
"That's not how it's going to be Bella, he cares about you too much to let you go, you guys would still be friends." I looked at her, and then she realized what I meant.
"You're scared because he hasn't imprinted on you..." I nodded my head. I felt like crying
"Sometimes, they don't imprint Bella. To be honest, this is really unheard of that this many of the wolves have imprinted."
"But Emily, Jacob is literally now the only werewolf.." She put her finger up to stop me.
"What about Leah?"
"Okay, Jake is the only MALE werewolf that hasn't imprinted."
"Imprinting isn't just a relationship, they are what they have to be for that person. You know that. Whether it's a brother figure or a protector or a lover." I nodded. I knew this but I knew that if Jacob ever imprinted it would be for the person he was meant to be with.
"Maybe it's because he doesn't care about the imprinting and just wants to be with you. I can tell how he looks at you Bella." I just rolled my eyes.
"Yea right.."
"No seriously, you have no idea how much the pack gets annoyed with Jacob, all he ever thinks about is you. They have to hum or think of some obnoxious annoying song weeks on end to just block it out."
I raised an eyebrow.
"Do I even want to know what kind of songs?" She giggled.
"Paul's been stuck singing barbie girl from aqua for the past 2 weeks. If you leave a room and he'll be by himself he'll still hum it." I couldn't help but giggle at that.
"Poor guys, Jake is making them all turn into those horrible radio stations that play the most annoying songs over and over." I started laughing. I felt a bit better and I was very appreciative of Emily trying to look out for me.
"Trust me Bella, he looks at you, like he already has imprinted.. He's always around you and he can't stand being away from you for long periods of time. Even a few days and everyone tells him to go to your place before he would make Paul destroy the mass population of deer we have in the woods."
"Well I'd hate to be the reason deer would be on the endangered species list in Forks." She giggled.
"Sometimes, you have to work hard for your imprint. Just let go of everything to finally be with that person, no matter how hard it is." I nodded.
"You shouldn't worry so much about Jacob, he really loves you." I smiled at that thought. I hugged Emily as she hugged me back.
"Thanks Emily." She looked at me into her eyes and put her hands on both sides of my face.
"It's alright Bella, this conversation didn't happen though. I won't say a peep to anyone." I nodded and did a zipper on my lip and looked like I had thrown away the key I had locked it with. She laughed.
"Oh! I know how to make this night better!" She squealed.
"Uh oh.." I trailed off raising an eyebrow at her.
"Oh don't worry just follow me." She got up and walked around to the front yard and ran to her car.
Emily got a big tablet and easel out of her trunk. Just then Seth was walking up the street, hand in hand with a girl.
"Bella!" he yelled running up to me and giving me a hug.
"Hey there Seth!" I said hugging him back.
"Happy birthday!" He said all excited. "I'm sorry I was late, I had to pick up Anna.." He turned to her and I could tell how he felt about her already just watching him look at her. Emily was right, I had seen Jacob look at me that way, or at least I thought so. It gave me some sort of hope for us, causing another chain to break. I just smiled watching him look at her.
"Hi, my name is Anna." She put her hand out. She definitely was his type of gal. She was Caucasian with beautiful blonde hair. It reminded me of Rosalie's. Her eyes were a beautiful blue color that popped thanks to her blue mariner's tee shirt she had on.
"Seth you made it!" Emily said excited.
"Of course, I wouldn't miss a party at Bella's place." He turned to the house and realized how lively it was.
"Didn't expect this at all huh Bells?"
"Nope not at all." I smiled at him. Seth was so young and full of energy he always found ways to keep everyone happy around him.
"Heard anything from Leah?" I asked.
"She's not here yet?" I shook my head.
"Huh.. she left about an hour or so ago from the house to get your present.." I looked at him in shock.
"Seth Clearwater, you better be pardon my french.. shitting me.."
"Nope." He said with a smile.
"Well, I guess when she shows up she shows up." Seth said.
"In the meantime.." Emily said handing the easel over to Seth.
"You can carry that inside." We all walked back into the house as Emily made an announcement.
"Okay, who's up for charades?" Most of the pack put their hands up. We all tried to crowd into the little living room, but it was no use. With our limited space we gave up and moved everyone outside to the backyard. Jacob and I set up the porch lights and tiki torches so we had enough light. Everyone sat around on the grass except for Sue Clearwater, Billy, and dad. They were on the same team anyways so it made it easier. The teams were split up between two teams of five. Me, Jacob, Quil, Embry, and Emily were on the same team against Paul, Charlie, Billy, Sam, and Jared. The rest that remained watched the fun.
The last subject was movies and our teams were both tied five to five. Jacob and I had been watching movies almost every Tuesday night. It became kind of a date night for us in a way. I figured I could guess some of them. I got one of them, earning us a point. The last one, I had no idea about.
Emily was the person up for us to guess what movie she was trying to make out. She looked like she was doing some sort of boxing and then looked like she lifted something in the air with both of her hands.
"Mr. Nanny!" Yelled out Charlie. Emily shook her head no.
" Predator!" Yelled Jared, Paul smacked him upside his head. Emily then looked like she was writing on a piece of paper.
"Oh! Say anything!" Yelled Jacob.
"Point for Jake's team."
"Yea we won!" Quil jumped up and down.
"In your face!" Embry taunted as he jumped as well.
"What's say anything?" I asked. Jacob turned to me almost in shock as did Emily.
"Bella, you've never seen say anything?"
"I've never even heard of it."
"Bella it's one of the most iconic movies in the nineteen eighties."
"Well that would explain it. I hadn't seen many eighties films." Then Paul even looked at me stunned.
"What about the brat pack films?"
"What are those?" Paul gave himself a face palm and just sat back on the grass. Jared popped up
"Really Bella? I mean.. Really?" I nodded. I didn't know what they were going on about.
"Okay list off best eighties films!" Yelled Jared. Emily got her easel with the big tablet ready.
Everyone was stirring now over movies. I saw Seth get up.
"The Goonies! Even I've seen that one!" Emily wrote it down as everyone noted them.
"An American werewolf in London!" Yelled Jared. All the pack seemed to root for it. Charlie just scratched his head and looked at Billy who just shrugged. Me and Jacob watched them and laughed.
"The Lost Boys!" Yelled Embry. Everyone seemed to boo at him. A wad of paper flew out of nowhere and hit him in the head as he sat back down. I leaned in towards Jacob and whispered in his ear.
"Let me guess, a vampire movie." He nodded.
"It's not too bad though."
"Say Anything!" Jacob yelled out. That probably should've been first on the list after that round of charades. By the time we were done there was a list of about 15 movies that I had only barely heard of and not seen at all. I felt like I had been buried in some deep hole for about the last decade. How did I not hear of these movies. Most of them all high school or coming of age flicks.
"Don't worry Bella, I'll lend you say anything. I have it at home."Emily said to me. Jacob nodded towards me.
"I'll pick it up and bring it over on Tuesday for our movie night." I smiled.
"Sounds good." He smiled back and I couldn't help but nuzzle myself against him. He just wrapped his arms around me and put his head onto mine.
"Who's up for cake?" Said Charlie. Everyone got up as Charlie and Sue walked out with the massive cake in their hands. It had the candles that were numbers. It had twenty-one on it. Everyone sang happy birthday. Of course Embry and Jared and Seth sang along about how I smelled like a monkey and how I looked like one too. The cake was almost gone when someone walked around the side yard.
"Sorry I'm late Bella." Leah Clearwater made it to my party.
"There's still some cake left. Would you like a slice?" Sue asked her.
"Yes please." She cut her a piece as Seth ran up to her.
"What made you so late Leah?" Asked Seth, with Anna next to him.
"I hit some traffic on the way out of town, I was so beyond pissed...Anyways, I got your gift." She handed me a small box that had comics from the Sunday paper wrapped around it.
"Leah, you didn't..." She put her hand up.
"Look, I know that we didn't get along before.. but, I'm really trying to be nice and give you a chance here, so don't muck it up okay?" she said. That was probably the closest thing to nice I was ever going to get out of Leah Clearwater. I ripped open the paper and opened the box. I pulled out two books from the box and stared at them reading the titles over and over. I started laughing.
"Someone actually wrote these?" I asked almost wiping a tear laughing at the titles.
"I thought they fit the Bella I've seen lately more than the one I remembered before." The two books were Pride and prejudice with zombies and Little women and werewolves. I handed them to Jacob and he started laughing.
"Poor Josephine March.." He said out loud. I almost looked at him in shock. He put his hands up in protest.
"Wait a minute, I have older sisters! My mom used to read them that story a long time ago!" I laughed.
"Leah, thank you.." She smiled at me, an actual warm smile.
"It's no problem Bella." She then went over to Sue to get her piece of cake and eat it.
"Oh crap that reminds me, we had to save a piece of cake for Ruby." Jacob ran over to sue to grab a slice of cake to put in the fridge for safe keeping. When he came back out of the house he walked back up to me and grabbed my hand.
"What is it Jake?" I asked him curiously.
"I still haven't given you you're birthday present." Uh oh.. I thought.
"Don't worry I just don't want people around, especially Embry and Quil." I could agree with that, those two definitely knew how to rub things in. if it was anything near sweet Jacob would never hear the end of it. He walked with me up to my room and I turned the light on. He pulled something out of one of his big pockets on the side of his jean shorts.
"Here.." he handed me a jewel case with a CD inside.
"It's blank.." He shook his head and smiled.
"No, just all the tracks are unlisted. It would make you listen to the whole CD that way. I really put a lot of thought into those songs for you. I want you to listen to every one of them." I hugged him tightly, almost too excited to wait to put it in. I opened it up and he was in front of my CD player.
"You can't play it til after I go home tonight." I stomped my foot on the ground like a four year old. He crossed his arms at me. Probably waiting for me to stick my tongue out at him too.
"Why not?" I asked him.
"Because, that way when I see you tomorrow, you won't turn down what I have planned." I raised an eyebrow.
"What exactly do you have planned?" He looked at me sheepishly.
"Well, that depends on if you are free tomorrow and for a good part of Monday." I smiled at him.
"Totally free." I answered. He smiled back at me and I felt my heart skip a beat.
"Pack your backpack with overnight stuff and bring your hiking boots, oh and your fishing pole you barely ever use."
"Should I worry?" I asked almost concerned. Hearing about hiking boots, overnight bag, and fishing pole in the same sentence kinda scared me.
"Don't worry Bells. I promise you'll have a great time. Bring one of those books of yours that Leah just gave you." I nodded.
"Okay, I guess I'll go.. but where are we exactly going?" I asked him curiously.
"That, miss swan is a surprise." Now I really was worried.
"Don't worry I already threw the idea to your dad and my dad they were both fine with it. That should you that you won't be in harms way at all. I mean your dad is the chief of police." I smiled.
"Okay fine I'll go. What time should I be ready tomorrow?" He rubbed his chin.
"Well I would guess we should leave here around 10 am? That will give us enough time to get over there part way then hike the rest."
"Yikes, hiking..." he rubbed his hand up and down my arm. I was ready for his heat to cause my arm to burst into flame.
"Don't worry Bells, it's not a lot of hiking I promise. Also it's supposed to be really nice out tomorrow." I thought for a moment, I hadn't hiked in a long time. Last time I really hiked was about four months ago. We didn't get far before it started pouring down rain and decided that it was better to go another day. We never did talk about going on another hiking trip again after that. I had gotten a cold for a few days after I was soaked by the time we got back to my truck. I was miserable for those few days. The only thing I didn't mind was the soup that Jake made me or at least heated up from a can.
"Jacob! Come on! Everyone is leaving!" Billy called upstairs.
"Bella come downstairs and say goodbye to everyone!" Yelled Charlie. We both went downstairs. I said goodbye to everyone and thanked them for coming. I helped dad pick up the trash that was laid out and put the little bit of leftovers away which consisted of a half a bag of potato chips, a piece of cheese, and about two slices of birthday cake.
"Well Bells, I hope you had fun." Charlie said as he scooped up a few plates off of the living room table.
"I had a blast dad. This was probably the best birthday ever." He smiled.
"Well I'm glad." We put all the trash into the big black trash bags and I hauled one and he haled the other two over his back and we dropped them in the now overflowing trashcan.
"Well I better get to bed dad, I have a big day tomorrow with Jake." I said almost running up the stairs.
"You guys going out?" He asked.
"Yea, he has me packing up for a night. I think we are camping outside." I almost cringed at that thought.
"I think you'll have a good time Bells."
"I think I will too. I better get to bed though, it's really late." I looked at the clock and couldn't believe that it was already almost close to one in the morning. I saw Charlie yawn and stretch.
"Yea, I think I'm going to bed myself, I'm getting old, this is the latest I've ever been up." I laughed.
"See dad, you're not that old." He smiled.
"You're only as old as you feel Bells." I smiled.
"Night dad."
"Night Bells." I ran upstairs and got changed. I changed into a different tank top and shorts to sleep in tonight. My shirt was still on my bed. The window had been open and the smell of Jacob was fading away from my shirt. I then remembered the CD and decided to put it in my CD player next to my bed and put my headphones on. I laid in bed waiting for the first track to play. I pulled the blank insert out of the jewel case and got my pencil from the nightstand. I wrote down all the tracks that Jake had put on the CD. Some I had never heard before, some I had to look up online by the lyrics to find out what songs they were. I found that track five was Force of Gravity by BT. It was easy to notice that song, I thought of Jake and I dancing as that song played as I had my eyes closed. Some of the songs, tore at my insides as I listened to all the lyrics. These songs were all songs that obviously made Jake think about me. When the last song, which was track fourteen came on, my jaw almost hit the floor. It was unthinkable by Alicia Keys. I looked at all the tracks that I had written down.
1)Letting the Cables sleep - Bush
2)Save you – Michelle Branch
3) Gravity - Sarah Bareilles
4) The best of me – The starting line
5) Force of Gravity - BT
6)Please, Please, Please let me get what I want - The smiths
7)Brown eyed girl - Van Morrison
8)Your eyes - Peter Gabriel
9)What if – Safety Suit
10)Until the day I die – Story of the year
11)In my arms - snow patrol
12)Dark blue – Jack's Mannequin
13) Words meets Heartbeats - Parachute
14) Unthinkable - Alicia Keys
I couldn't believe how much thought he had put into this for me. I couldn't wait to see him tomorrow to thank him. I was still holding back, but I knew this weekend was the time I talked to him. I had promised Jessica and Angela and most importantly to myself. It wasn't fair for me to not tell Jake what was wrong. I was in love with him after all. I'm just scared of what could happen if I let myself love him. I set my alarm clock to make sure I would be up and ready for the next day. I put the CD on repeat and had one of the headphones against my ear as I slept. My sleep shirt still slightly near my nose as I could smell the last remnants of his scent on my clothes. I closed my eyes, hoping for good dreams for that night.