Song belongs to Disney's Robin Hood. Also the name Scarlet Pimpernel belongs to another, but I just thought Hiss would make a good Disney version of him. Anyway, enjoy!

Ch.14: Phony King of England

After making their way through the brush, Robin and Marian looked around the clearing that serves as the hideout of Robin's band. With its clothes on the clothesline and pot in the campfire, one would think of it as more of a campsite. But Marian doesn't seem to mind.

"Oh, Robin," she said, hugging her love, "what a beautiful night…I wish it would never end." Robin just hugged her back and held her for a few seconds before…

"Surprise!" Clawdia and Hiss jumped up from behind another brush along with Friar Tuck, taking the two lovebirds by surprise.

"Long live Robin Hood!" the badger cheered before his two mice friends Father Sexton and Little Sister climbed onto his head and cheered for them as well.

"And long live Maid Marian!"

"Bravo! Bravo!" Soon everyone else was cheering on the now engaged couple smiling sheepishly before Clawdia went over and hugged Maid Marian.

"I'm so happy for you!" she said with delight.

"Thank you so much," the vixen replied with a laugh before Clucky spoke up.

"And down with that scurrrrrvy Prince John!"

"You said it, Clucky," Hiss laughed.

"Yeah!" Little John laughed, playing on his lute to start up a song. Alan and the other musicians joined in before they all began to sing the song portraying that wannabe Prince John.

Hiss: Oh, the world will sing

Of an English King

A thousand years from now

And not because he passed some laws

Or had that lofty brow

Clawdia joined in with Sir Hiss as Marian joined in their merry dance.

Clawdia: While bonny good King Richard leads

The great crusade he's on

We'll all have to slave away

For that good-for-nothin' John

Hiss blushed at how close the two of them are now but smiled with a chuckle. She's just so cute like that.

Little John: Incredible as he is inept

Whenever the history books are kept

They'll call him the phony king of England

Friar Tuck and Musicians: A pox on the phony king of England!

Clawdia and Hiss then turned to see Little John pull back a shirt on the clothesline to show a hollow oak with a large hole as if for a puppet show. Everyone began to laugh as a makeshift puppet of Prince John (played by Friar Tuck as they soon found out as he tried to fix the puppet's crown) bouncing about inside the hollow and bowing to them. Hiss's eyes went wide however when he saw a sock puppet of himself (played by Otto) pop up next to it.

"Oh, no," he laughed, covering his eyes with his tail.

Little John: He sits alone on a giant throne

Pretendin' he's the king

A little tyke who's rather like

A puppet on a string

Otto then made the Hiss puppet talk to the Prince puppet, lifting itself higher that he pulled him back down (Friar Tuck). It then came back and blew at the other puppet with a party blower, tipping its crown to the side to make it beat it with a stick. The Hiss puppet then got back at the other puppet by grabbing the stick and beating him back, making the Prince puppet hold its ear with one hand and suck its thumb on the other.

"Does Prince John really do that?" Clawdia laughed.

"So much," Hiss answered with a smile, "that I think he should consider therapy." Clawdia then went hysterical before burying her face into his neck.

Alan-a-Dale: And he throws an angry tantrum

If he cannot have his way

And then he calls for Mum

While he's suckin' his thumb

You see, he doesn't want to play

Everyone then went hysterical with laughter when the Hiss puppet beat the Prince puppet again and made it rip to shreds, surprising the puppeteers themselves. Hiss just laughed with them, feeling pretty good with himself.

Little John: Too late to be known as John the First

He's sure to be known as John the Worst

A pox on that phony king of England!

"Lay that music on us, Al!" Clawdia called to her rooster friend. The minstrel obeyed and rocked it out to have the other musicians rock out as well. A lot of couples then began to dance to the music: Robin and Marian; Little John and Clucky; and an owl couple. Hiss then turned to Clawdia with a smile.

"Care to dance, Clawdia?" he asked. She just returned the smile.

"Yeah, let's rock and roll, Hiss!" she cried, and he took her hand with his tail before they started dancing as well. As they did, they smiled at each other, not wanting to tear away from the other.

Alan-a-Dale: While he taxes us to pieces

And he robs us of our bread

King Richard's crown

Keeps slippin' down

Around that pointed head

Clawdia felt as though she and Hiss were made for each other. After all they've been through since the day they first met a couple of days back, she was really starting to fall for him, despite his working for the Prince.

Little John: Ah! But while there is a merry man

In Robin's wily pack

We'll find a way

To make him pay

And steal our money back

Hiss was also feeling the same way as Clawdia. Although he works for the Prince and she's working with Robin, he's willing to betray the Prince John for her and Marian. After all, he did make himself that promise for her. And Clawdia's the proof. You might say that Robin and Marian brought those two together.

Clawdia: The minute before he knows we're there

Ol' Rob'll snatch his underwear

Everyone laughed when Robin slipped into the shirt of the Prince John puppet while it's still on it. Everyone agreed that he'll snatch it all from under that tyrant's nose, right down to the undergarments.

Hiss: The breezy

And uneasy

King of England

They all partied the night away, the fireflies dancing around them to make the festive dance livelier.

Little John: The snivellin'-grovelin'

Measly-weasely

Clawdia: Blabberin'-jabberin'

Gibberin'-jabberin'

Hiss: Blunderin'-plunderin'

Wheelin'-dealin'

All: Prince John, that phony king of England

Yeah!

It soon became late, and everyone returned to the village with the song still in its voices. The only ones who remained were Robin, Little John, Marian, Clucky, Friar Tuck and the Church Mice, Clawdia, Alan, and Hiss. They agreed that Marian and Clawdia remain with Robin and his band for a while so as to avoid the Prince doing them harm. Hiss will also keep in touch with them with a few trained messenger doves he has trained and still keeps with him, reporting anything that might have happened in Nottingham.

Before he left to return to the castle, Hiss stood by the clearing with Clawdia.

"Are you sure you'll be okay?" she asked, slight nervousness in her voice. Hiss can tell that she's worried about him, so he just tilted her chin up with his tail with a smile.

"Do not worry, dearest," he assured her. "I may fear the Prince a bit, but I'm more cunning than he is…and more cunning than Old Bushel-Britches." Clawdia laughed a bit before he went on. "If anyone asks, I simply was knocked out from behind, been out for hours, and woke up in my room after one of the guards found me."

"Sounds good to me. Hopefully, they'll buy it."

"I'm sure they will. In the meantime, take good care of Marian for me."

"You can count on me…Scarlet Pimpernel." Hiss chuckled as he looked down at the clasp on his cape.

"I like that name," he said before looking at her again. "Very well, 'Scarlet Pimpernel' shall be my undercover name…as long as I address you as 'Shadow Lavender'." Clawdia giggled with a blush.

"Deal." Hiss then kissed her on the lips goodbye before leaving, and she simply watched after him with a smile. Both of them can feel their hearts fluttering with delight at the thought of the kiss.

When Hiss secretly returned to his room in the castle without anyone else noticing, he changed out of his costume and hid it away before drifting off to a peaceful sleep of dreams about him and Clawdia together.