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part 14
Leonardo came very close to meeting death.
It was that event more than anything that made the brothers all realize what Master Splinter had been trying to teach them their entire lives. Their existence was going to be difficult and perhaps brutal, made so by the shear circumstance of what they were.
They now had an arch enemy and a deadly foe. He had tried to lure Leonardo over to the dark side and had nearly succeeded. Despite his obvious maturity, Leo was still a teenager with only fifteen years of life from which to cull experiences. It just wasn't enough.
Fortunately, Master Splinter had intervened to show Leo that he was about to answer a siren's call. Ashamed of his actions, especially about how he had argued with and nearly killed Raphael by tossing him off of a building, Leo defiantly turned down the Shredder's offer.
The insult from someone as lowly as a mutated turtle was too much for Oroku Saki, who did not take the rejection well. They had all survived the ensuing battle, thanks primarily to Master Splinter's skill and ingenuity.
Unfortunately, the Shredder did not stay down and when he returned it was with a vengeance. Catching Leo alone on the rooftops, Shredder's minions beat him mercilessly.
Shredder's attempts to remove the rest of the clan from existence resulted in April losing her home and store. With Leo near death, the group needed a safe place to take him, and so Casey drove them out to his family's farmhouse.
Seeing his oldest brother lying battered and broken on the couch was too much for the emotional Raphael. In spite of their differences, Raph knew deep down that he needed the brother who was his leader. Leo was the solid foundation that helped Raphael hold it together.
Raph tried to hide his tears but his Father saw them and he attempted to offer the red banded turtle as much solace as he could. Their sensei had then reached into Leo's mind with his tale of the youngster's battle to overcome fear.
The story had given Leo that final push he needed to begin to fight his way back to his family. Raph was both overjoyed and determined; swearing that he wouldn't leave Leo's side until the elder brother was fully recuperated.
With Raph occupied by his self-proclaimed vigil, Donatello and Michelangelo found themselves spending a lot more time together. Don's usual distractions weren't available; other than repairing the heating system, the oven and the water heater, there wasn't much for him to do.
Since none of those repair jobs took up very much time, Don began to take long walks with Mikey, exploring the woods around the farm and trying to be prudent about not being seen by the crazy neighbor or said neighbor's pit bull.
Mikey was not as careful when he was alone, and wound up drawing the attention of a crazed reality television monster hunter. He, Don and Casey worked as a team to rid themselves of the woman and Mikey gained a new level of respect for the brother he tended to think of as a geek.
While the free-wheeling Michelangelo and the studious Donatello were sharing an adventure, Raphael was busy with a project of a greater magnitude.
Next to Leo's bedside nearly round the clock, Raph was the first brother the eldest saw when he finally recovered enough to sit up. Raph brought him food and the tale of what had happened during their fight with Shredder, as Leo had been unconscious for a good portion of the battle.
Leo's body slowly recovered, but his spirit remained in a vacuum. He ducked away from Raph's attention and holed up in the barn, feeling sorry for himself.
Raphael watched him from a hidden spot just outside of the structure and came to understand that Leo was embarrassed. Leo had let himself be trapped by the Shredder and his minions, he'd lost his swords, and his deepest feelings of worthlessness came from the belief that he had let his brothers down.
Knowing he couldn't allow Leo's dejection to turn into a deeper depression, Raphael intervened.
Firing up the old blacksmith bellows, Raph gave Leo some salvaged steel pipe and the motivation to forge himself a new set of swords.
The work was hard, hot and tedious. Leonardo had several books on the art of forging a katana, and both he and Raphael had studied them on numerous occasions. Recalling as best they could the techniques used, the pair set about making serviceable weapons from the materials at hand.
They did not have months to create the perfect set of swords, nor the proper equipment, but they were determined to do the best work possible. To that end, Raph and Leo practically moved into the barn, sleeping in blankets tossed on top of hay and sharing meals while seated on the dirt floor.
For the first time in years they didn't argue or fight; instead they each took the time to gather a greater insight into one another. Complete understanding was too far out of their grasp; they were infinitely different in many ways, but in others they were nearly the same.
Raphael came to respect Leonardo's persistence; the thing that drove his brother to strive for perfection in all things. Leonardo in turn began to appreciate Raphael's obstinance; the stubborn streak that kept his red banded brother from ever admitting defeat.
While they worked they talked.
"Raph, can I ask you a question?" Leo was flexing his hand, the bandages newly removed. Feeling more confident than he had in days, Leo was determined to broach a subject that he knew was probably going to be sensitive.
"Yeah, sure Leo. Ask away," Raph said glibly as he stoked the fire.
"What happened between you and Michelangelo? Neither of you has been the same around each other since the pipe incident," Leo said.
Raph paused for a moment; then said blithely, "Ain't the pipe incident enough? I let my temper get the best of me and almost killed my baby brother. Oh, and thanks for bringin' that back up again."
Leo set the hammer aside and turned his attention fully on Raphael. The radiance from the fire bathed Raph's skin, making the emerald green seem to glow. Its heat set a fine bead of moisture on top of the bigger turtle's body, defining the bold musculature.
Eyes narrowed, Leo felt as though he were seeing his hot headed brother for the first time, and his breath caught.
Trying to disguise the warmth he was suddenly feeling, Leo said, "I think something precipitated that pipe incident, and I'm sorry to open that wound. I just feel like neither of you has really healed from it. I want us to always be close enough to keep those kinds of injuries from festering."
"Don't worry about it, Leo," Raph said, looking up to see his brother staring at him. "Okay? It's just something between me and Mikey and we're workin' through it."
A spark came and went in Leo's eyes. "Mikey has always had a special bond with you."
Raph shrugged. "I was overprotective of him when we were kids. Ya' remember how he was always clinging ta me. It's just habit and he's growin' out of it."
"I don't like to see Mikey get hurt," Leo said in a low tone.
Something in his voice made Raph turn around. Leo's face was as inscrutable as ever, but Raph, whose raw instincts were especially sharp, knew there was something his brother was hiding.
"Ya' that worried about me too, bro'?" Raph asked, his voice becoming husky. He wasn't sure what it was about Leo that made his voice drop that way, but he meant to find out.
Leo's eyes became rich amber pools for Raph to drown in. Staring back at his brother, Raph refused to let the viper's allure pull him in to his big brother's trap. This was a trick Leo had learned at an early age, and while it worked on Mikey and Don, Raph had his own indomitable willpower to fight with.
"I worry about all of you," Leo finally answered, wrestling with the golden gaze that was his greatest ally and his biggest foe.
"But ya' suddenly got an urge ta oversee Mikey's well-being, that it Leo?" Raph asked, pushing against Leo's iron resolve.
"It's possible I do want to take more of a vested interest in his welfare," Leo said. "That shouldn't bother you since you've clearly chosen not to have him 'clinging' to you any longer."
Raph wasn't quite sure how to respond to that. There was something in Leo's voice, his eyes and his entire demeanor that Raph could only read as hunger. Raphael had always been a little fascinated by Leo; he was the most mysterious member of the family.
But this Raph recognized; Leo's insatiable appetite for something he wanted desperately. He had wanted to be leader and had turned himself into the perfect son, the perfect shadow warrior and the perfect ninja in order to attain that goal. His desire to be the best had even drawn the Shredder's attention.
"Ya' ain't got enough Leo? Now ya' want Mikey too?" Raph asked, his voice a deep caress.
"You don't," Leo said flatly. "Isn't that why you two had that fight? Mikey knows what he wants; he always has. Turn him loose Raphael."
Raph's emotions warred with each other. If he was understanding Leonardo correctly, his oldest brother wanted from Mikey what the youngest had hoped to get from Raphael.
Leo would treat Mikey right; Raph knew that. Since Raph had told Mikey he didn't lean in that direction, the thought of Leo moving in to take his place shouldn't be bothering him, but it was.
With a sudden stab of what he knew had to be irrational jealousy, Raph decided he didn't want his Mikey to belong to Leonardo. The problem was that Raph wasn't really sure what to do about it.
Raph could tell by the look on Leo's face that his brother was reading him and he was slightly irked by that fact.
"I ain't his keeper," Raph growled.
"You aren't letting go, are you?" Leo asked, a corner of his lip curving upward. He took a step toward Raph without meaning to; the emerald turtle's stubbornness always seemed to pull him.
"You ain't making any sense, Leo," Raph told him. There it was again, that low level hunger that Raph had sensed earlier.
"Someday you'll stop denying yourself brother," Leo said. "I'll be there when it happens."
Turning back to his hammer, Leo began to work the now cooled metal, behaving as though their conversation hadn't happened. Raph continued to watch him for several long moments before returning to his own job.
He didn't forget though. The knowledge that Leo's latest hunger was for their youngest sibling wouldn't leave his mind, nor would the final promise.
Because when Leo made it, Raph felt the hunger reach out for him, too.
"Are they still in the barn?" Mikey asked as he peered out of the window.
"Yep," Don answered, piling an extra blanket on his bed.
Even with the fireplace going and the heat on, the open room in the loft where Don and his brothers slept was cold. Mikey shivered and turned away from his viewing portal.
"The blankets don't help," Mikey griped as he sat down on the edge of his bed. "I was still freezing last night."
Don stopped what he was doing to look up. Mikey was holding himself and staring morosely at the floor.
"What's your problem?" Don asked. "You had a shell of an adventure this week and other than the deep freeze in the back of Dr. Finn's truck, you haven't seemed to be all that bothered by romping around in the snow."
"That's the point, Donny," Mikey said in his most sarcastic tone. "Romping in the snow is fun because I'm moving. Moving means I don't get cold."
"You could always take up sleep walking," Don told him.
"Ha, ha. Funny turtle," Mikey responded. "Remember when we were all little and slept in the same bed? I was never cold then."
"I remember," Don said, "that you moved around a lot and always managed to kick me in my face."
"I didn't do it on purpose. I was asleep," Mikey pointed out.
Don laughed. "I know. Look, I have an idea. Why don't we shove our beds together and share all of the blankets? That should keep us warm."
"Not afraid I'll kick you?" Mikey teased.
"For a little warmth I'll take my chances," Don said.
As they started to shove the beds together, Mikey asked, "What about Master Splinter?"
Don made sure the beds were solidly against each other as he answered, "Sensei fell asleep downstairs on the couch. He's got that giant comforter and the fireplace to keep him warm."
"Not to mention all that fur," Mikey said as he crawled into bed, pulling the blankets up to his neck.
Doing likewise, Don shifted closer to his little brother. Something in their mutation kept them from being completely cold-blooded, and the warmth emanating from Mikey's skin called to him.
Feeling Don draw nearer, Mikey followed suit, imagining he was a tot again. Burrowing into their nest and surrounded by all three of his brothers had always been his favorite way to sleep.
Thinking of his brothers made Mikey ask, "Donny, what do you suppose they're doing down there?"
Turning onto his side, Don studied Mikey for a moment before answering. "Judging from the flickering light and the heat coming out of there, I'd say they've got the forge going."
"Oh." Mikey mulled that over for a second, and then said, "Oh! Swords?"
"That would be my guess. Leo's trying to wallow and you know Raph doesn't put up with that. So either they fight, or they work together towards a common goal."
"I haven't heard any yelling," Mikey said happily. Staring up at the ceiling, Mikey asked, "Donny, has Leo ever come to you and like, asked if you needed um, stuff?"
Don frowned. "What kind of stuff?"
"Like, someone to talk to?" Mikey was fidgeting with his fingers beneath the blankets and Don saw the movement, recognizing that Mikey was agitated by something.
"He's asked me if I've needed help with things," Don said. "And of course we talk some. But he's never asked if I needed to talk. Why did he ask you that?"
"'Cause he said he thinks Raph and I aren't close anymore and maybe I need someone to talk to," Mikey explained.
"And that's been bothering you, his asking you that?" Don asked.
"Yeah, sort of," Mikey said.
"Why?" Don lifted himself on one elbow to look down at Michelangelo. "That seems innocuous enough; why would that question bother you?"
Mikey looked up into Don's eyes. Embarrassed by his conclusion, he nevertheless felt compelled to tell Don everything, just as his brother had trained him to do since they were small children.
"I think he wants to be with me," Mikey admitted in a voice barely above a whisper.
Don stared down at Mikey, entranced by his unnatural blue eyes, and thought about what Mikey had just said.
"Be with you as in sex, Michelangelo?" Don finally asked, wanting clarification.
"Yeah." This time Mikey did whisper, and the sound made Donatello's pulse race.
"Mikey, why did you and Raph have that big fight?" Don had broached the subject to Raph just once, and although Raph talked about almost everything else, that particular event was still taboo.
"I tried to get Raphie to love me," Mikey answered simply and Don understood everything.
"Raph doesn't think of you that way, does he?" Don asked.
"No." Mikey's eyes were starting to shimmer and Don knew he was more upset than he'd been letting on.
"Mikey, do you even know what you would have done if Raph had agreed to 'love you'?" Don placed a comforting hand on Mikey's stomach and began to rub slow circles on it.
Mikey managed a grin. "I only needed your help figuring out masturbation, Donny. Geez, I've got a pretty good idea about the other stuff."
"And you're positive you want to do that with Raphael? He's a guy just like you, and he's your brother." Don said.
"Stating the obvious there, Donny," Mikey said with a little hitch in his voice. "Point out the female turtles and I'll weigh my options."
"You can always choose abstinence," Don told him.
"I probably would if I wasn't already in love with Raphie," Mike said. "Take back the female turtle comment; I wouldn't choose one even if I did have the opportunity."
Don continued to pet Mikey's plastron. He had himself day dreamed about the red banded turtle; Raph was in fact his favorite masturbatory aid.
But Raph was not the only brother he thought about in that way. Mikey had always fascinated him as well; the youngest a complicated mixture of worldly knowledge and naiveté that Donatello found entrancing.
Mikey may not have thought overly much about the fact that they were brothers, but Don had. Whether or not they were actually genetically linked didn't matter; Master Splinter had made them a family and pronounced them brothers.
Their options for finding mates was greatly limited, although not completely impossible. But it seemed that they were all, except for Raphael, uniformly drawn to each other.
"I think our mutation may have predisposed us to certain physical and psychological compulsions, Mikey. In other words, nature may actually mean for you and Raph to be together."
"And Leo?" Mikey asked.
"Yes, Leo too," Don said.
He didn't add that he had been feeling the same needs. Mikey's plastron beneath his hand felt extremely sensual, the slight scraping sound it made against the rough pads of Don's fingers an almost blissful song.
Mikey realized why Raph always went to talk to Donny and no one else; his genius brother was very easy to open up to.
"So what should I do?" Mikey wanted to know. "Do I just keep waiting for Raph? I want him to be happy; but I don't want to scare him off again."
A fire was growing in the pit of Don's stomach as he continued to run his hand over Mikey's upper body. He didn't want to take advantage of his brother, but he knew his need was going to become too much for him soon.
"Mikey, do you want to practice a simple way to give Raph pleasure? Something that doesn't come on too strong and won't embarrass him?" Don asked in a breathless undertone.
The gentle play of Don's hand across his scutes had gone unnoticed at first, but Mikey was slowly melting into the feeling. He didn't want it to stop; in fact, he was really wishing Don's hand would move lower.
"Okay," Mikey said softly, amenable to anything at this point.
"Then I'm going to touch you, and you're going to touch me," Don said, sliding his hand down Mikey's center frontline. "Instead of using your own hand, you'll use mine."
"Ahh, ahh, o . . . okay," Mikey said again with a soft groan as Don's palm rubbed over the growing bulge beneath his plastron.
"That's right Mikey; just relax," Don crooned, watching Mikey's eyes slide shut as little shivers of enjoyment shook his body.
Don smiled, continuing to move his hand as Mikey's pleasure grew. Tonight Donatello would give and he would take, but not too much.
There was, after all, a time for everything and two other brothers that would need to be appeased.
TBC…