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Zombieland: Cherish What's Left Over

Chapter 14: Of Violence and Friendship

"Time to nut up or shut up!" yelled Tallahassee, grabbing a nearby rake and digging it into the zombie's face. "Little Rock! Columbus! Go get the stuff together! I gotta feelin' we're gonna be swarmed!" yelled Tallahassee. Little Rock and Columbus ran outside but ran back inside at Tallahassee's orders. Wichita walked out onto the porch to find Roanoke frozen in her spot, eyes wide with fear and confusion. Wichita walked up beside her and bent down to whisper in her ear. "Are you sure you want to be a coward again? When you could always impress Florida?" she said in a barely audible voice.

Roanoke stood up abruptly and walked like the terminator over to a nearby shed. She went inside and in a matter of seconds, she was standing in the doorway holding a shovel and a weed hacker, oh, and to add a nice touch, lightning flashed. Roanoke threw the weed hacker to Tallahassee, who luckily caught it, and she sprinted at another zombie with her shovel. Roanoke began to bash the undead's head in with her garden tool and Tallahassee was mowing a zombie's face off. After he did so, he walked over to Roanoke who was still beating the zombie's head in, even though it was clearly dead, she showed no mercy. "I think it's dead." said Tallahassee bluntly. "Think so?" asked Roanoke plainly, pulling back her shovel and stepping back to examine her work. "Y'know, if you tilt your head a bit, the part right there, no, there, it kind of looks like a pony." said Roanoke, pointing at the corpse. Tallahassee tilted his head. "Yeah, I think you're right." Wichita laughed but the moment was to be disturbed quickly, for night was upon them and it was beginning to rain heavily.

"We got everything!" yelled Columbus from the door. "Good, let's go!" They ran inside and Roanoke had convinced them to stay for another minute so she could gather things that were sentimental and valuable to her. She gathered a half bag's worth of things from her room and she also grabbed all of her karate weapons from the den. They were about to leave when Roanoke stopped short. "Wait! I forgot Fluffy!" Tallahassee rolled his eyes. "We don't have time to get the snake right now!" Roanoke shook her head. "We can't just leave him! I want to bring her!" Tallahassee made a face. "No way we are bringing that thing with us!"

"I've had her since I was sixteen! I--" Tallahassee stepped forward and put a hand on her shoulder. "We can't, come on, I'm sure your snake will be alright, they fend fer themselves don't they?" he asked. Roanoke gave a solid nod. "You're right, let's go." Wichita gave a faint smile in the background and they all ran out to the van. "Just in time!" Tallahassee shouted, looking at a small group of zombies closing in. "Floor it!" Roanoke yelled to Wichita. "Don't have to tell me twice." Wichita mumbled before speeding out of Roanoke for good.

"Sixty-four bottles of booze on the wall! Sixty--"

"Okay! We get it! There's lots of booze on the wall! Shut up about it! Some people are trying to sleep!" yelled Columbus. Tallahassee thumped Columbus upside the head and Little Rock stuck her tongue out at him. "You're just upset 'cause you can't drink any! Ya sissy!" sneered Roanoke. Tallahassee laughed. "Whatever." mumbled Columbus before getting comfortable again. He closed his eyes and Tallahassee put his finger over his lips and motioned for the others to lean in towards Columbus. Everyone did so and Tallahassee counted backwards from three on his fingers. On one, they all began to sing really loudly in Columbus' ears. "Sixty-four bottles of booze! Take one down--"

"Aaargh!" Columbus threw his jacket over his head and covered his ears. The gang burst out laughing and Tallahassee was in stitches. "Raise your hand if you wanna spend the rest of the ride picking on Ohio over here!" Everyone but Columbus raised their hands. "Aye!" Roanoke giggled. "All who appose?" Columbus lazily raised his hand and mumbled from under his jacket. "Nay!" Everyone laughed again and after a few jokes, the gang began to settle down and have some normal conversations.

"So, you can tell by the weather that it's almost Christmas time!" said Little Rock. "What about Thanksgiving?" asked Wichita from the wheel. "I really don't think that there's anything left to be thankful for." mumbled Roanoke. "Well, then we'll have a small dinner, light a candle and call it Thanksgiving." smiled Wichita. "Now no one mention Halloween, I think we've all had enough of that holiday!" Tallahassee laughed at Roanoke's comment. "What if all these zombies were actually just people in costumes?" he asked playfully. "Well, then we'd be going to hell." Roanoke said. "Hah, hah! Highway to hell! Highw--"

"Don't start." said Roanoke, putting her finger in Tallahassee's face. "Anyway, do any of you guys wanna celebrate Christmas!" asked Little Rock. Roanoke chuckled. "Not any time soon, Lil' Rock, I just don't see me singing carols around a tree in the next couple months." Tallahassee nodded in agreement. Little Rock frowned. "Sorry, chick, I might get you a little somethin'- somethin'." Roanoke winked at Little Rock. "Hmm, what about birthdays?" asked Wichita, a curious glint in her eye. Roanoke looked up in thought and Tallahassee scratched his chin. Both had intense looks of thought plastered on their faces. "We could arrange that." they both finally said in unison, with both of their signature smirks. Roanoke looked at Tallahassee. "How old are you?" she asked. Tallahassee chuckled. "Old enough." Roanoke made a face. "Fine, I won't tell you how old I am then." she said like a spoiled brat. "Like I need to know that to get you in--"

"Twelve year old awake and in the vicinity!" shouted Wichita, glaring at the two in the rear-view mirror. The two glanced at Little Rock who had a confused look on her face. "What?" she asked. Roanoke's eyes widened and she leaned forward and grabbed Wichita by the collar of her shirt. "You haven't told her?" she whispered. "No! She's twelve!" Roanoke rolled her eyes. "I was ten when I found out!"

"Yeah, well you're not in charge of my little sister!"

"I was just assuming she'd know! I mean, after all the cons you two have pulled, you had to have pulled one on a guy sooner or later!"

"Look, that's not the point! She'll know sooner or later, until then though, please refrain from your raunchy comments with Tallahassee!" Wichita hissed. Roanoke sighed and slumped back into her seat. Tallahassee scoffed and Roanoke snapped her head in his direction. "What?" Tallahassee shrugged and his smile faded a bit. "Nuthin'." he said, taking his hat off and beginning to play with it. "Oh it's somethin'." Roanoke said slyly. Tallahassee shook his head slowly. "Drop it." he said. Roanoke made a face but ignored it and decided it woud be best to get back on subject. "So... birthdays. What are we gunna do?" she asked. "We could pull it off, we just need to know each other's birthdays." said Wichita. Little Rock's face lit up. "Okay, me first! June eighth is my birthday!" Roanoke nodded. "April first for me." she said. "No way! Your birthday is on April Fool's day?" said Wichita. Roanoke nodded. "The doctors weren't joking... well, they were, they made a very mean joke about how I had some sort of disorder, my mom nearly had a friggen' heart attack and when they said they were joking my dad was about to kill them." she laughed. The others laughed too. "That's funny, my birthday? September fourteenth." said Wichita. They all looked to Tallahassee. He sighed. "July twenty-ninth." he said. "Okay, so the nearest birthday is... me!" said Roanoke cheerily. Tallahassee grunted and smirked when he remembered that Columbus was still sleeping. "Who wants to ask Nerd-face over here what his birthday is?" he asked. Roanoke smirked. She leaned in towards Columbus and poked him. "Hey Columbus!" she fake-whispered. Columbus grunted. "When's your birthday?" He grunted again in response. The other four laughed and Roanoke leaned her head back against the seat. Her eyes began to close. She let out a yawn fit for a lion and curled her legs up into the seat. Little Rock followed in the suit and cuddled up against the door, falling asleep as well. Tallahassee yawned and tilted his head to the side. He soon, nodded off.

Roanoke woke up and looked at the car clock. It was four in the morning. She noticed a weight on her shoulder and that her head was leaning on something. She looked down to find Tallahassee's head on her shoulder and her head on his. She gave an almost nonexistent smile but on the inside, she was blushing. She remembered that Wichita was driving and she decided to trade places with her before Wichita fell asleep. She looked in the rear view mirror just as she felt as if the van was swerving a bit, which was normal since it was raining but Roanoke had a bad feeling. She saw that Wichita's eyes were fluttering open and closed and Roanoke lunged forward. "Wichi--" she started but it was too late, the van swerved off the road and into what Roanoke assumed to be a ditch. She blacked out.

Roanoke's eyes fluttered open and she looked around to the best of her ability. She could tell she was at an awkward angle and nothing seemed right-side-up. She felt something heavy on top of her and her eyes widened when whatever it was began to stir. "Tallahassee?" she wanted to yell but she was almost positive that it sounded more like a pained groan. "Roanoke? You okay?" came Tallahassee's gruff voice. "I think so, I dunno, I can't feel anything." she said, a hint of fright in her voice. "Hold on." Tallahassee positioned himself so that his hands were on either side of Roanoke, his hands being supported on the door frame. He lifted most of his weight off of Roanoke and she could ease up a bit. "Oh my God!" she whispered. "What?" asked Tallahassee. "Little Rock was beside me and the door's open! And we're... what are we?" Tallahassee looked around, he saw a figure that looked like Columbus in the passenger's seat and he couldn't make out what would look like Wichita. "Horizontal apparantly." he grumbled. Roanoke groaned and held her hand up to her head to hold a sudden searing pain. She examined her hand and saw that it was dark and wet, she also felt a warm liquid oozing down the side of her face. "Crap!" she snarled. "What?" Roanoke pressed her hand as hard as she could to her forehead. "My head!" Tallahassee reacted. "Whoa there! Easy now, somethin' may be wrong with that cabbage head of yours, just hold on." he said. "Can you move your arms?" he asked. Roanoke nodded. "Good, now, I want you to hold onto that door and I'm gonna unbuckle your seatbelt, when I do, you're gonna drop from what it looks like so I need you to hold on alright?" Roanoke nodded and got a good grip on the ajar door, despite her stinging head. Tallahassee felt along her waist until he found the button. He pushed it and the belt came loose. As he said, she dropped and yelped as she slid across the leather seats and out the door. Despite all warnings in movies, she looked down. She saw a small, dark figure on the ground and a larger figure not too far from it. She looked around. It seemed as if they had fallen off a hill and they were stuck between the hill and a tree. The van was totaled from what she knew and the ground was a long ways away. "What's it like?" asked Tallahassee from inside. "Wierd, it feels like I'm in a friggin' film!" Tallahassee paused. "Do ya see the girls?" he asked. "I think that's them on the ground." Tallahassee made a face. "Ground?" he questioned curiously with a hint of caution in his southern voice. "Yeah, from here, it's about a ten foot drop! We're caught in between a tree and a hill!" she explained. "Alright, uh, look, can you get yourself down by using the tree?" Tallahassee asked, inching his way a bit towards her door. "It should be easy, everything's pretty much layed out for me but the problem is, I can't feel my legs, it's like they aren't even there, I can't move them." Tallahassee bit his lip. "Okay, I gotta check on Columbus, can you hang there for a bit more 'til I figure something out?" Roanoke sighed. "It's not like I have a choice, but if I were any other girl, I'd be down by now, so you're lucky." she said.

Tallahassee fought gravity and set his foot on the side of the driver's seat. He held onto the passenger's seat with one hand and he pushed on the door on his side with the other. He swung the door open and and he climbed out of the van. He stuck his head out of the door opening and looked around. Roanoke was right, the passenger's side was level with the hill and the other side was completely facing the ground. He climbed out of the van and crawled until he was on the solid ground of the hill. Tallahassee sighed and he crawled over to Columbus' door. He reached inside the broken window and unlocked the door. He flung the door open and he dragged Columbus out of the car. He layed him flat on his back on the hill.

"Columbus! Columbus!" Tallahassee persisted as he slapped Columbus' face gently. Columbus' eyes fluttered open and he moaned. "Wh-what happened?" he asked, his words a bit slurred. "Car crash. Now, are you okay, 'cause I gotta go help Roanoke." said Tallahassee. Columbus nodded. "Just a few cuts as far as I can tell." he responded. Tallahassee nodded. "I need you to get to the bottom of the hill, under the car, I don't want you hangin' around all vulnerable and stuff up here." Columbus nodded and slowly picked himself up, nothing ached too bad so he was in the clear. Tallahassee carefully out of the van and handed it to Ohio. He then sprinted down the hill. When he was under the car, he looked up at Roanoke who was still holding onto the car door.

"Hey, if you could jump down, I could catch you!" Tallahassee said to her. Roanoke thought for a moment. "Well, it's dark out, you may not be able to catch me! It's a friggin' ten foot drop, Tallahassee! What if I just waited for the feeling in my legs to come back, I could climb down then!" Tallahassee shook his head out of impatience. "No tellin' when the feelin' will come back, and by then, the feeling in your arms could be gone! Just jump! Trust me!" Roanoke took a deep breath and fought her conscience. She released her fingers and she fell. She didn't scream but she had to hold her breath to keep from doing so. She fell for what seemed like forever until she met a comfortable feeling that made her relax. She inhaled a nice-smelling scent and she honestly thought for a moment that she was in heaven. She opened her eyes and saw that Tallahassee had caught her and was holding her bridal-style. Tallahassee set her down on the ground gently. "You okay?" he asked gently. Roanoke nodded. "Come on, we gotta help the girls." She said, nodding in the direction of the motionless figures on the ground not too far from where they were now. Tallahassee nodded and dashed to the figure of Little Rock while Roanoke crawled over to Wichita.

"She's breathing!" said Tallahassee. Roanoke let out a sigh of relief and turned Wichita over onto her back. Roanoke assumed she had some broken bones but the crook in Wichita's nose was obvious. Roanoke checked for a pulse and she had one. She let out another breath she'd been holding in. "Come on, Wichita. Wake up!" Roanoke urged, slapping her face as Tallahassee did earlier to Columbus. Wichita's eyes shot open and she immediately sat upright. "Whoa, whoa, whoa! Hold on! Wichita! It's okay! Calm down, I don't know what's wrong with ya." cooed Roanoke, setting Wichita back down onto her back. Tears began to form in Wichita's eyes. "My sister?" she choked. "I think she's doing okay. Hold on. Tallahassee! What's the 411 on Little Rock?" Roanoke hissed to where she assumed Tallahassee was. "She's good, still unconscious but I don't feel any broken bones or nothin'!" Roanoke gave a faint smile to Wichita. "See? Just relax." Roanoke began to feel Wichita's ribs and nothing felt wrong, she moved onto her arms legs and hips and detected nothing out of the ordinary. "Well, the diagnosis? A broken nose and some major bruising, you're gonna be fine." said Roanoke. Wichita nodded and tried to sit up again. She winced when the muscles in her abdomen had to work. "Yeah, there are gonna be bruises the size of Texas right around in there so take it easy."

Roanoke tested her legs and she still couldn't feel them, so she crawled over to where Tallahassee and Little Rock were, Wichita followed and she could see that Columbus was there too.

"How is she?" asked Wichita. "Okay, she's just gotta wake up." said Columbus. "Little Rock! Little Rock! Come on, wake up!" urged Wichita and Roanoke. Little Rock groaned and they all leaned forward. Little Rock stirred and everyone held their breath. Little Rock opened her eyes and everyone let out the breath they were holding in. Wichita hugged her sister tightly and Little Rock hugged back. "Anythin' wrong, Pipsqueak?" asked Tallahassee. "My ankle and wrist sting, and my head hurts." Tallahassee nodded. "Yeah, all of our heads hurt, probably whiplash er somethin'. You probably have sprained joints, but we'll put pressure on those later." Little Rock nodded and sat up all the way. "Look," Tallahassee sighed, "We gotta get the guns and find a nearby place to stay until the sun comes up. We can't take shelter in the van obviously and we're sitting ducks at the moment." Everyone nodded in agreement and Tallahassee got up to go salvage some guns from the van.

It was going to be a long morning.

I know! Cliffhanger! i'm evil! Anyway! I hoped you liked it!

Roanoke: Please review!

Tallahassee: Or we'll find you.

Little Rock: and wreck your car.

Wichita: and ransack your house.

Columbus: and take your cat.