NOTE:
Starting at this particular chapter are various oneshots I've written and posted on my lj… but just never got around to posting here. Some are for my Lucius & Hermione & Draco claim on lj's ff100 community, some are just plain random. Take your pick & enjoy if you can.

A Dramatic Display
astarvingwriter

Standard Disclaimer Applies
Author's Plea: Entirely random and silly. Even less of a point to this one. A bit of pointless fluff that wouldn't leave me alone when I was working on Falsity.
As always, enjoy if you can.

They could hear the happy murmuring of hundreds of happy teenagers even through the thick wooden doors of the Great Hall. It was almost enough for her to lose her nerve. It was more than enough for him.

"I believe I left something in my common room..."

"Your spine?"

"This is a stupid idea!"

"It was your idea!"

"All I said was that it might be best to start small and work up to the truth. This isn't what I meant!"

"Well, it's too late now! Really, Draco, do you really believe a plan endorsed by your father is stupid?"

"He hasn't exactly shown the best mind for strategy."

"Yes, but I thought up the details for this one and both of you have used my ideas before with limited success--"

"Limited--"

"--And only limited because neither of you cared to listen to my entire strategy before running off with it."

"Bollocks."

"Perhaps a language you comprehend easier: if you do not do this correctly, I will not hesitate to tell your father about that certain indiscretion behind the greenhouses."

"You wouldn't!"

"You know I would."

They glared at each other unrepentantly until he gave in to the painful promise in her eyes.

"Fine," he spat angrily. "Let's get this over with and save our arses. I'll still have you know that all this is entirely your fault."

"So says the boy who locked me in a room with his father. Did you really expect us to exit gracefully?"

"I didn't expect you to exit at all."

"Too bad. Now get ready. Time to change everything."

The Hufflepuff had just settled himself in with a full serving of roast beef and roast potatoes, fully prepared for an altogether satisfying and uneventful meal, when one of the doors to the Great Hall opened with some effort to reveal a furiously snogging couple.

At first, the Hufflepuff was content to ignore them. After all, he didn't see a yellow tie and he was far too young to be thinking that sort of behaviour appropriate. However, it suddenly occurred to him what colours the ties actually were.

He squeaked, and it happened to be at the exact right frequency that made near everyone in the Great Hall turn towards the source of the noise and find instead the two enemies locked in a passionate embrace.

"Hermione!" a certain angry Gryffindor shouted at exactly the same time a certain female Slytherin squealed in disgust before promptly passing out.

The noise of her head hitting the hard stone floor had just the percussive sound necessary to stir the lovers from their activity. They smiled giddily at each other for a second before Hermione Granger turned and acknowledged her audience with an unfeigned blush.

"Um... Good evening."

"How could you, Hermione?" asked Harry. "You... He... How could you?!"

"O, don't sound so accusatory, Harry. This has nothing to do with you."

"Yes, Potty, so shut it."

"Quiet, Draco."

"But, pet..."

"How many times have I asked you not to call me 'Pet'?"

"That isn't what you said last night."

A startled and giddy gasp went through the Great Hall.

"Are you trying to embarrass me, Draco?"

"Ah, so you get it now, do you? Wondered how long it would take you to pick up on it, Mudblood!"

A startled and disgruntled gasp went through the Great Hall.

"You... You..." Hermione spluttered before her countenance hardened considerably. "Well, I was only using you to get to your father!"

"WHAT?!" several people, students and professors alike, proclaimed.

"All this time I've been sneaking off with you, it was only so I could be closer to Lucius!"

"But... But... You were never at the manor! You couldn't have been with my father as he can't leave!"

"Did you really think you could hide that portkey you keep in your dorm secret?"

"You filthy Mudblood, stay away from my father! I'll kill you first!"

"Are you really going to kill your own step-mother?"

The gasp this time was followed by several low clunks as several students fainted from the shock. Everyone else leaned forward so as not to miss the rest.

"Draco, I do believe this is it for us. You simply are not up to standard. I suppose I'll be seeing you during the holidays though, so stop snivelling and apologize already."

"I will never apologize to a filthy Mudblood, even if she has ensnared my father in some spell."

With a huff and a flourish, Draco strode out of the Great Hall to the sound of silence. Hermione watched him go, content to savour these last few moments of speechlessness. When she finally turned to confront the contorted faces of the student body, she almost wished she could take a bow.

Such was it that all of Hogwarts, and the wizarding world at large, became aware of the relationship between Hermione Granger and Lucius Malfoy.