Chapter 14: Inevitable changes

Sasuke watched as Sakura and Sarada sat under the tree watching the sky looking perfectly content. Sasuke was just about to leave back into the cave because he felt as though he was intruding when Sarada's voice stopped him.

"Mama? Why don't you date?" the question seems to hang in the air as the leaves were blown by the wind, Sasuke putting all of his ninja skills into hearing the answer.

"Because I am married to your father." Even though the answer seems to come from Sakura so effortlessly, he was disappointed to hear her answer. For a moment, he wondered what he wanted to hear.

"But he's never around." Sarada said and Sasuke could almost imagine the scowl on her pale face. He himself frowned at her words.

"I'm still married to him." Sakura answered and Sasuke wanted to see her, he wanted to look at her for some reason, but he stayed hidden behind the wall of the cave. Sarada stayed quiet for a while and Sasuke thought she might've finished interrogating her mother.

"But if you weren't…?" she finally asked quietly and Sasuke held his breath because, as much as he didn't want to admit it, he was afraid of what she might say.

"It wouldn't be fair." She answered softly.

"To who?" he was almost taken aback by Sarada's voice asking the question he had asked himself.

"To whoever it is I date. Because I am still very much in love with your father." The answer seems to come to her so naturally and effortlessly. She didn't sound sad or regretful. She sounded as if she had thought about it. As if she had tried and failed. Sasuke couldn't help the small leap of his heart as he heard for the first time, in what felt like forever, those words from her lips. The last time had been the night before he left as he made love to her and she cried whispering it over and over again. The morning after when her lips formed the words, he had quickly kissed her preventing her from saying it because every time she said it, her words and voice seem to have some kind of sadness he couldn't put his finger on.

"How can you? Can't you see how awful he is? How can you love him after what he did to you?" now Sarada seemed almost angry, her voice a little frantic. Sasuke listened with bated breath because he has been wondering that for so long, since he left the village as a child he had been wondering how she is still capable of loving him so unconditionally.

"I know what you think of him honey, but he's not the person you think he is. You are only judging him from this one thing he did. You don't know him like I do. And its not your fault, its his fault that you don't him as well as you should. But he's…amazing. And despite what you think, he loves you very much. He's just… afraid of losing you because of his past. I know that one day you'll be able to forgive him, when you understand him." Sakura's voice was so unbelievably soft and and not for the first time Sasuke wondered how he was ever lucky enough to have her. "Just because he doesn't love me, doesn't mean he's a bad person." The sadness in her words were palpable and it made Sasuke snap his head up towards the voice.

'What!?' he couldn't help thinking the question. What does she mean by that? But before Sarada could continue her questioning, Sakura abruptly interrupted her.

"I think its time we went home. Get your things." She hurriedly said as if she had said something she shouldn't have. As if she had spoken forbidden words. Sasuke watched as Sarada confusedly looked up at her mother and Sakura smiled warmly down to her. But she didn't question her mother and stood up from her lap. Sasuke also went back in side the hideout, not wanting to get caught eavesdropping. He sat down at the kitchen table and sighed as Sarada didn't even spare him a glance. It didn't look like she was ever going to forgive him; his hearts ached at the thought.

Sasuke wondered why Sakura had said something like that. Why would she tell Sarada that he didn't love her? Or…did she actually believe that he didn't love her? How is that possible? He's never actually told her in words that he loved her, but she had to have known. Unless of course…she didn't. It would explain so many things, like her constant sadness, her tears the night he left after they got married, 'she didn't know!', the thought hit him like a brick to the face.

Just as that thought crossed his chaotic mind, Sakura walked in to the kitchen. They stared at each other for a while, Sakura with the same sadness she always carries when she looks at him and Sasuke with realization.

"We were thinking of going back." She broke the silence. "I would've liked to see Karin and Suigetsu, but I guess they are somewhere in here. I hope they visit before they leave." She said walking towards the exit of the kitchen, towards the room with Sarada's things in it.

"Sakura!?" He abruptly stood up as she walked by the table, the chair he was sitting on toppling over behind him making a loud crash in the quite room. She turned around towards him, her green eyes wide with surprise. "I heard you outside." He said quietly and she seems to look at him questioningly before realizing what he actually meant. He bit her lower lip as if she were afraid of what is to come.

"Then I hope you will find more time in the future for your daughter."

"That's not what I'm talking about." He said, though guilt still ate at his heart. "Sakura…why do you think I married you?" he asked hoping to get the answer from her. Sasuke could tell she was surprised at his question. She licked her lips before answering.

"Why does that matter now?" she said attempting to laugh yet failing due to the seriousness of the situation. Just as these words left her lips, Sarada came in with wide eyes, having heard the loud clatter of the chair hitting the floor.

"What's going on?" she asked looking back and forth between her parents.

"It matters to me." Sasuke said ignoring Sarada for the moment. He couldn't stand that Sakura didn't know such an important thing. He's never felt this way about anyone else and he wanted her to know, especially now that he knew she thought otherwise.

"Sasuke…please…" she pleaded moving her eyes towards Sarada as if she were begging him not to carry on. But he was going to, he couldn't stand for Sakura to spend another moment without this knowledge.

"Sakura…I married you because I have feelings for you." He blurted out and he knew his ears were pink from admitting something so personal. "The…romantic… sort." He added before she got more confused. His eyes went from Sakura's wide green ones to Sarada's equally wide dark ones with her mouth hanging open. She looked absolutely flabbergasted.

"You…" Sakura's voice broke and she swallowed before continuing. "…you love me?" she asked breathlessly as if that was the most unlikely thing ever. He could already see the start of tears in her eyes and was already becoming uncomfortable, but the happiness that he knew she was holding back was almost visible in her eyes as well.

"Tch, don't ask stupid questions." He said as his heart started beating against his rib cage. He felt ridiculous, why should he be nervous? But she recoiled at his words and he let out a sigh. He knew he was going to have to be much more delicate. He knew he has to put his personality aside for a while, at least until she got it through her head that he meant what he said. "Are you telling me that for twelve years, you didn't know I was in love with you?" he felt this was a question that needed immediate attention. Sakura's eyes widened at his covert admission.

"You never said." She said almost in a daze, her voice a whisper. Sasuke ran a hand through his hair.

"I thought you just… knew." He said as he looked anywhere but at her.

"How can I possibly assume such a thing when all its done in the past is hurt me Sasuke?" she asked in an exasperated voice making Sasuke realize that this was his fault, the list never stops.

Of course Sakura wouldn't assume his feelings for her because he had never even acted like it. Looking at his past behavior, even before he left the village, Sakura would never think that without him telling her. Why hadn't that occurred to him earlier? He could've saved both of them from so much pain if he hadn't let his pride lead his life.

Sarada spent the whole time looking from her mother to her father, her head spinning back and forth, her dark eyes bewildered. Had her father never told her mother that he loved her? Yet her mother had never stopped loving him despite him never having taken five seconds out of his life to reciprocate those feelings. How was it ever possible for her father to deserve her mother? Why does she love him so unconditionally? What is it about her father that she couldn't see but her mother never stopped seeing? She was baffled, she was confused, she didn't know what to think. What does this mean? Will her father be part of their lives now? Does she even want that? What will happen to her if her mother decides to accept him back? What will happen to the family that consisted of just her and her mama? May be she shouldn't have come looking for her father? May be it had been a mistake after all?

Her eyes finally landed in her mother's viridian ones and the happiness in them was almost palpable to her. When it came to her father, her mother's eyes were always filled with unshed tears, tears she wouldn't let fall in front of anyone else, especially her. Her eyes were filled with tears of happiness and Sarada felt like her relationship with her mother has forever changed. She felt like the happiness she has always felt when she was with her mother is getting further and further from her. As soon as she felt the image of her mother waver in front of her she ran back inside the cave she had just come from as she felt her life crumble around her.