Wizards of Waverly Place
I've got a secret
Part Fourteen: Day Fourteen
It was Friday, October 15, 2010, and the Russo's were all in hot pursuit of their lost persons. Little did they know that dangers awaited them like they had never dreamed of even in their darkest nightmares.
Justin, Theresa, Kramer, Max and Juliet had just woken up to the same house the Unknown Passer had guided them to the previous night, still unsure of their next move in finding Jerry. "Uh, that was the worst night sleep ever, ah who am I kidding I never sleep better than that, even on a chair." Stated Justin who had just awakened.
"Ya that was one of my better nights." Stated Juliet. "But where do we go now? All we know is that Jerry is hostage in a studio or something, and I doubt they would take him to the one we watched the filming in. Justin, what do we do?"
"Beats me." Said Justin as he picked up a bottle of cologne and lathered it into his hair. "Well, maybe they took him to a warehouse, I know if I kidnapped somebody, I'd take them to a warehouse."
"Well we'd better hurry on." Said Theresa.
"Ya, who knows what they're doing to him." Stated Kramer.
At the studio where Justin and Juliet had watched shooting, Jerry was clad in a knight's suit and was acting out the terrible dialogue they had put in the film at the last minute, but it didn't matter, for it was some of the best scripture in the production. "Oh my king, why haths, hath, thy, calledeth, I don't think they put 'eth' at the end of every work." Stated Jerry as he put down the script.
"Yes they do, just like it says in this ancient biography!" Yelled the man, also the producer, as he held up one of his prior films that was released to less than ten theaters.
"Even I didn't see that one." Said the other man.
"Shut up, Lewis!" Yelled the man.
"Sorry, bro." Said Lewis.
"I don't know, maybe he's right, and this movie isn't as great as we've made it out to be to the academy of film judges." Stated a lady worker, who happened to be the man's sister.
"Ya, we should take a real good look at this script before we continue filming the movie." Stated the head of the film's script, who was the man's dad.
"No! I have never had a script re-written in my history of directing!" Yelled the man.
"You've also never had a film earn more than thirty thousand dollars." Stated the man's mother. She didn't work there, but she was just fun to have around.
"Son, I am telling you this as your father," Started the man's brother. "I know you like to do things in the spur of the moment without any consideration, but it doesn't always work."
"Yes, my unconsidered actions always end up great!" Yelled the man as he banged his fist on the table, which shattered under the weight of his fist, they couldn't afford real tables.
"Want some coffee honey?" Asked the man's wife, who had messed up hair, a cigarette in her mouth and a glass of wine in her hand. He had met her at the same film school he went to, not knowing she would end up just as successful as him.
"Well, maybe you have a point, we've all lived doing whatever feels natural, and between the three of us we've produced eight films that never made it to more than thirty theaters, and have had six of the stupidest children ever born." Stated the man.
"Nine." Said the dad, obviously referring to the three he had.
"So, what do you say?" Asked Jerry.
"Alright, we'll take another look at the script, but we want your son to shut down that mob of his!" Yelled the man's sister.
"I heard he has Ray Liotta in his mob." Stated the father.
"Ray Liotta!" Yelled Lewis.
"I loved him in Goodfellas." Stated the mother.
"Ma, we had an agreement, if you wanna come, you have to stay quiet." Said the man.
"I will not be silenced!" Yelled the mother in her raspy voice, which sounded just like Ma from 'Ma's Road House'.
"Don't worry, once my son sees that your film isn't a piece of rubbish that will corrupt culture for years to come, he'll call of his mob." Stated Jerry.
"See honey, not all people are bad there's good in every man." Slurred his wife in one long statement with no stops and she leaned on his shoulder and slid on to the floor.
"So, can you let me go now?" Asked Jerry.
"No! Nobody can ever leave once they have seen the secret recording studio!" Stated the man. Around the studio were old cameras, rotted wooden sets, webbed up sound booths, and a man with no clothes watching film strips of the desert and mumbling to himself.
"Ha, can ya get me in to see Ray Liotta in concert?" Asked the man's mom.
"He's not a musician." Stated the man.
"Can you get me in too?" Asked his sister.
"Oh." Groaned Jerry.
Meanwhile in the park, Alex was still searching for Mason when she heard footsteps following hers. "Hu, who's there!" She demanded. She turned around to find the path clear. "Hu, oh well." Said Alex as she carried on.
Behind Alex, hiding behind a tree was a member of the mob, accompanied by Sergeant de Havillan, who isn't a real police sergeant at all. Ha ha, once she finds that boy, we'll capture them both, making our chances of capturing Jerry for their ransom even greater, for I can only assume that this Mason is her brother, and therefore Jerry's son." Stated the Italian mob member.
"Yes, and to think we never would have known about Justin's family, if it weren't for that spy we hired who has diligently spied on them for the past week." Stated de Havilland as the spy walked out of the shadows. It was Susan Lucci.
Thank you, Ms. Lucci." Said the Italian mom member.
"Yes, I personally have a vendetta against the family, for you see, Alex Russo is a great enemy of mine.
"Ah, either way, we will soon have Jerry Russo in our clutches, and dead, and in payment to you, we will kill all other members of the Russo family, for nobody opposes the great unnamed mob of New York." Stated the Italian mob member.
"Ya, and nobody opposes detective de Havilland either!" Yelled de Havilland.
"You know that you're not a real mom member don't you?" Asked Susan.
"Nobody opposes me!" Yelled de Havilland.
"I'm sorry." Said Susan as she ate off the hair which she held in her hands.
In the city, the Russo's were walking cautiously across the walls of the buildings near the sidewalk. "Uh, I hope we find Jerry soon, without those sunglasses the police will be on us in no time." Stated Justin.
"Oh, we're never going to find him it's hopeless, it's hopeless!" Yelled Max.
"Shut up Max, Jerry could be tied to a pole with, five men pointing guns at him or, being lowered into a shark tank, and you want us to go home and forget him?" Demanded Juliet.
"I don't want to go home I was just saying that we'll never find him, not that that's going to make any difference." Said Max.
"No, we'll look for Jerry for the rest of our lives, because Russo's never leave their family behind no matter how hopeless it looks!" Yelled Theresa.
"What about Alex?" Asked Kramer.
"What about Alex!" Yelled Justin as he took a potted plant and put it in front of his face and soil started to leak out the hole in the bottom.
"She could be in the forest helpless being eaten by bears or rhinos." Stated Kramer.
"Oh my." Said Max as he looked at a magazine he found on the sidewalk.
"Rhinos, in New York?" Said Juliet.
"Ha, you had film makers lowering Jerry into a shark pit." Stated Justin as soil poured on to his feet, then he took a step and he tripped and fell right into the plant and it's dirt.
"Where'd you get a cable strong enough to do that?" Asked Theresa jokingly. Nobody laughed and they all stared at her.
"Ha, you look really familiar." Said a man with a cup of coffee. "Where do I know you from?"
"Uh, us, we don't know you, in fact, you look like the least familiar person I've ever seen." Stated Theresa.
"Ha, you look like my wife, three children and my brother, who all live in my house, ha here they come now." Stated the guy as they walked up to him, and each person was lined up with the one they look like. Seeing them all together they realized that the man looked just like Jerry.
"Jerry!" Yelled Kramer.
"No, I'm Larry." Stated the man.
"Wow, you guys are just like us." Stated Hutton, who was just like Justin.
"Are you guys wizards too?" Asked Justin loudly.
"No." Said the person who was just like Juliet, who's name cannot be said in this story.
"Wow, us neither." Stated Juliet.
"Wait I thought tha..." Started Max.
"Nope, no wizards here." Stated Kramer.
"Glad to hear it." Said Rodger.
"Well, see ya." Said Theresa as they ran off.
"Weirdo." Said the Theresa like woman.
"Yep." Said the Max like person as he ate some of the soil on the ground.
"Ha, stop right there!" Yelled a cop as he ran at the Russo's.
"Uh oh." Said Justin as they stopped. The cop ran up right to the Russo's, then immediately turned around and wrestled the other family to the ground.
"You're under arrest, Justin Russo!" Yelled cop.
"You got it all wrong, I'm no..." Started Hutton as the cop punched him in the stomach. "Hu!"
"That was fortunate." Stated Theresa.
"Ya, now run!" Yelled Justin as they ran in the other direction.
Back at the forest, Alex had been walking for hours to no avail, until she came across a necklace laying in the grass. She picked it up to find that it was the necklace Mason had given to her, which he wore all the time to express his love to her. She picked it up and held it in her hand. "Oh Mason, where are you." Pleaded Alex as she put the necklace to her heart. At that point, it began to glow, and she felt a strong feeling. "Hu, what was that?" She asked herself. She had a strong urge to go to her left, and was soon assured that the necklace was leading her to her true love. She didn't hesitate another minute. She ran on to the left, deeper into the food.
Later on at about seven at night, the Russo's had finally made it to the filming studio, and found Jerry sitting in a chair as the six looked over their arbitrary film. "Guys!" Yelled Jerry.
"Jerry, we finally found you!" Yelled Theresa as she ran at Jerry with her arms wide open. Her path was blocked by a strong electric shock. "Ah! What was that?" She yelled.
"We know who you are, and we will not allow you to destroy out movie, for we have seen the light, and are ready to make it the best movie ever!" Yelled the man as he stood up and held his fist in the air.
"Ha, does whoopee have three o's or four?" Asked the dad.
"Five." Answered the sister.
"You don't understand, we just want to bring Jerr..." Started Juliet.
"Ha, we finally found the headquarters, I've waited so long for this!" Yelled Justin. "Let's do this, ha!" He yelled as he ran at the studio and began ripping props apart and smashing camera lenses with his fist.
"Stop, Justin stop!" Yelled Jerry.
"What!" Yelled Justin, who's fists were cut and covered in blood.
"These people have decided to redo their script, and to make sure it won't ruin fine film culture, Justin, don't they do the best they can?" Asked Jerry.
"Ha, ya know these inky pencils can show you how much writing fluid is in 'em?" Asked the mom as she held up a pen.
"This is the film company you hired insane mobsters and arsonists to help you shut down?" Asked Theresa.
"I could've wrecked this place no problem with these losers." Stated Max.
"We are not losers!" Yelled the dad as he banged his fist on the table, and there was a loud cracking. "Ah!"
"Ha, watch this!" Yelled Lewis as he lit a cigarette and threw it in the air, and it his eye. "Ah, ah!" He screamed as he kicked over the table and fell on the floor clutching his eye. "Uh, hu." Said Lewis as he sat in a chair and put the cigarette in his mouth.
"Alright, are you going to give Jerry back to us or not?" Demanded Kramer.
"No!" Yelled the man.
"Don't worry, I won't tell anybody about your, your old props, and, dirty cameras, or, your crazy mother." Stated Jerry.
"Ha, they should make beer cigars, so ya can smoke and get drunk at the same time." Said the mom.
"Well, alright, but we want it made known that you will never make any attempts to shut down out movie, ever again." Said the sister.
"Uh, well, okay, as long as you promise to make it better." Said Justin.
"Okay." Said Lewis.
"And, I want forty percent of what the movie makes." Said Justin.
"Alright, here." Said the man as he handed Justin ten dollars. "I want the change."
"Well alright, see ya guys." Said Theresa as they headed for the door.
"Ha, ya know, yer kinda cute." Started the man's wife. "Yer so tall, and handsome, tall." She said as she leaned on Kramer and slid on to the ground.
"Oh, honey, what are you doing?" Asked the man unenthusiastically not looking up from his script.
"Ya, gotta go, by." Said Kramer.
"Hu hu." Said the woman as Kramer moved and she fell on the floor.
"Ha, don't get blood on their, I just put cologne on their, and that stuff goes for thirty dollars a jar." Said the mother.
In the forest, Alex was deep in the woods, and was still looking at the necklace. "Left, okay, don't worry Mason, I'll be there soon." She said to the necklace.
"Wow, I'm glad we're home." Said Theresa that night as the six walked up to the house on the street.
"Ha, after all this time, home is where I want to be." Said Jerry.
"Where's the key, here it is." Said Justin as he unlocked and opened the door. "Ha ha, ha, who're y, ah!" Yelled Justin and the family as an arm grabbed and pulled them into the darkness of the house.
Will the necklace really lead Alex to Mason, or will she be eaten by a rhino first? Will de Havilland and the mob catch Alex and Mason, then kill the rest of the family? Will the movie really be improved? Will Ma invent beer cigars? Who grabbed the Russo's, and where did he take them? You'll know if you read the other 356 days in the year in the life of the Russo's, "I've got a secret."