Author's Notes: Thank you ever so much to the wonderful Phoenix for her beta work. She is wonderful! Another thank you to SouthernWitch69 for being my sounding board and helping me with ideas. And last, but not least, thank you to GeriPixie for her help with the cream Severus is concocting in this chapter. My team of supporters is ever growing, and I am so grateful.
Another thank you to toxicstarlit/ParkedSoul for her video she made for this story. It is wonderful! Also, thanks to AliceMeetsJack for her multiple illustrations for this story. And not to be left behind, SouthernWitch69 made a story using Yahoo emoticons. It is hilarious! I am also grateful to AmeliaQ for working on a Chinese translation of this story. I am so very humbled by all the support I have received from everyone. You can see the artwork on my livejournal under the art tab on my memories at www.remusseverus.
Thank you also to my reviewers. Each of you makes my toddler-filled days a little more enjoyable.
Yet more thanks to the mystery person who nominated this story in round six of the Multifaceted Awards in the Intelligence and Possibility categories. Any votes would be so very much appreciated. They also nominated my drabble series, Eternal Love, in the Shyness and Tears category. Voting opened July 5 and lasts through July 22. Copy and paste the following link to cast your votes.
http/multifaceted. HP didn't start out as mine, and it still isn't mine.
Chapter Fourteen
"You pathetic boy," Severus growled at Harry. "I see you have been filled in on the truth of what happened to Hermione. You really are just like your father. You prance around Hogwarts as if you own the place, barging into my presence, spouting about my love for Hermione as though it's some kind of perversion." His wand dug deeper into Harry's throat with each word.
"You love her?" Harry managed to wheeze out.
"Of course I love her, you bloody fool," Severus said thickly, digging his wand even deeper into Harry's throat. Magic coursed through Severus' body, and it was only with great effort that he forced it back. It was borne of his darker side and begged to be loosed. Instead of hexing Potter, as he was longing to do, he surprised himself by hissing, "Legilimens."
Images of St. Mungo's dominated the forefront of Harry's mind. Feelings of rage, sorrow, disbelief, and horror nearly overwhelmed the memory of Hermione telling Harry and Ron what had happened. When he lip-read Harry calling Hermione a bitch, Severus pulled out of his mind suddenly.
"How dare you blame her for the deaths of your parents? Don't you think she's going through enough right now without one of her best friends treating her the way you are? One hundred points from Gryffindor for sneaking off grounds."
"Typical of you to take as many shots at Gryffindor as you can," Harry managed to gasp. "Hermione, whom you claim to love, is in the hospital, with your child, and you are here, bullying your students."
He might have said more, but Severus rammed his wand so deep into his throat, it was all Harry could do to breathe.
"You think you are any better than me, Potter? You who called her a bitch, knowing that our son may possibly die? You who kicked her when she is already down? You who are supposed to be her best friend?" Severus spat angrily.
Harry's eyes flashed with pain, sorrow, and regret at Severus' words. As he continued to wheeze, eyes locked with Severus', Severus dropped him without warning.
"Get out of my sight, Potter. And know that it is only for Hermione's sake you are walking out of here under your own power."
Severus threw Harry's wand onto the ground, watching as Harry grabbed it and rose. "I love her, too, you know," he said softly as he walked out.
Severus walked to his desk, collapsing heavily into his chair. The magic that had coursed through him slowly settled down. It had only been his love for Hermione that had kept it in check.
"Hermione," he whispered, dropping his head into his hands.
Hermione awoke the next morning to find Remus Lupin sitting next to her bed.
"I woke this morning being pecked in the face by an owl. Tonks let him in, thinking to take the message, and it bit her. Minerva really knows how to pick the aggressive ones," he said wryly.
"I'm so glad you're here, Remus," Hermione said, swallowing a sob as she sat up. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you the truth."
"I understand why you didn't, Hermione," he said, smiling softly.
Hermione reached out, and he moved to the bed. Wrapping her arms around him, she buried her face in his chest and cried.
"I made so many mistakes," she cried, hiccupping.
"Shh… Hush now. Don't cry, Hermione. You were in a very difficult situation. You did the best you could," Remus said, trying to soothe her.
"Yes, messing around with Severus' life was the best I could do. I'm being punished now for messing around with time. Aiden is being punished because of me!" Hermione began shaking in his arms.
Minerva's letter to Remus had explained Hermione's entire reappearance. He was aware of the truth after having taught her in her third year. When he had seen her on the train, he had been shaken, but tried to reason that this must be his long lost friend's daughter. When he arrived, Albus had explained the situation, giving Remus strict orders to act as though he didn't know her. When Sirius had broken out of Azkaban and seen Hermione in the Shrieking Shack, he had thought much the same as Remus, assuming that she was their friend's daughter. He finally elicited a promise not to tell Hermione anything, but Remus had seen an odd gleam in his eyes and suspected that his friend might try to seduce the girl he had once convinced himself that he loved. His efforts to make Hermione like him only served to make her uncomfortable around him, and Remus had even heard Hermione tell Harry to be careful of Sirius' intentions once.
Now, the girl he had befriended was in his arms, unchanged, after nineteen years. It was uncanny and more than a little strange, but Minerva had felt that Hermione might need a friend who would understand what she had been through. Remus had not told anyone that he had been privy to all but one of Hermione's secrets, but Minerva's missive left him with the belief that she suspected Remus knew more that he had let on at the meeting with Albus.
"Aiden is not being punished for anything you did, Hermione," Remus said, rubbing her back. "You are not being punished either. Things went wrong because of the stress of traveling back here. You are the first pregnant woman to ever travel through time. No one knows how it might have affected your pregnancy. This is unprecedented." He didn't know what else to say to make her feel better, deciding that it would be a very bad idea to bring up how the potion being absorbed into her skin might have also affected her pregnancy. She was angry enough at Dumbledore already.
"I'm a bad mother, Remus! I can't even take care of my own son. What use am I? Brains don't mean anything if I can't even keep Aiden healthy." She began crying again and snuggled closer to Remus, seeking comfort as she once had. "And Harry hates me now! He asked me why I didn't warn his parents, and I told him I couldn't risk it. But I risked everything to be with Severus over a schoolgirl crush. I'm as bad a friend as I am a mother," she moaned.
Remus had been warned that Hermione was struggling with post partum depression, but he was unprepared for the amount of self-loathing that emanated from Hermione.
Placing his hands on her cheeks, he lifted her face until he could rest his forehead against hers. "You are not a bad friend nor are you a bad mother. Things are just not at their best right now. You need to remember the love those around you have for you, even if they might be angry right now. I love you, Hermione."
Severus woke early the next morning, still in a foul mood from dealing with Potter the night before. His head was throbbing, but he wanted the pain at the moment. He showered and dressed before making his way to his labs. Sifting through his neatly organized cabinets, he pulled out various bottles of ingredients. Setting them on the lab table, he began a base for Hermione's post partum depression potion.
"Unrefined, African shea butter," he murmured, setting the thick substance to one side. "Jasmine, Bergamot, Lemongrass, Roman Chamomile, and Rosewood," he continued.
Wheels spinning in his head, he moved back to his cabinets. Drawing his wand, he pointed it just to one side, whispered a charm, and a hidden drawer directly in the wall appeared. He flicked his wand again, and a lock clicked open. Pulling open the drawer, he carefully extracted two bottles, setting them on the lab table, and recast the careful wards on the hidden drawer.
Third night full moon fairy dewdrops, collected at midnight, and phoenix tears, he thought as he picked up the jars he had selected. These two bottles were the last he had of the precious and hard to find substances. While Dumbledore had Fawkes, it was not often that the Phoenix chose to gift his tears. My Hermione is worth it, he thought, a small smile splaying on his face as he crushed the herbs into a paste.
His thoughts drifted to Hermione as he added the paste to the Shea butter, mixing thoroughly. He had admitted to Potter last night that he was, in fact, in love with her. He knew that he loved her when she first arrived, but it was the first time he had actually said the words aloud in nineteen years. And he was angry because he felt guilty that they weren't said to her, but to her friend in anger. Slamming his fist down on the table, he finally gave in to taking a headache potion. Adding the dewdrops and the phoenix tears to the cream, he whipped it vigorously before transferring the creamy mixture into a small tin. As he walked from the lab, he stopped short, going back to his cabinet and pulling a small vial from it, placing it carefully in his robe pocket.
When he arrived at St. Mungo's, he was approached by a Healer who looked determined. He hadn't seen Healer Klein since he had yelled at her the day Hermione gave birth, but it was obvious that the story had spread. Most of the Healers he had dealt with since Aiden was born had been, at some point, his students. This one was no exception, except that she had also been his classmate. She had been a seventh year during his first year of teaching.
"Miss Warble," he said in greeting.
"Come off it, Severus Snape," she said irritably. You were my classmate. I remember you when you were called Snivellus. Don't you think we all heard that nickname with James and Sirius running around? You were only my teacher for one year, and you don't intimidate me. And I haven't been Miss Warble for years. You may refer to me as Healer Tate."
"Well, Healer Tate," Severus said, his respect for her growing despite her bringing up his schoolboy nickname, "what can I do for you this morning?"
"You can find a place for Miss Granger to stay. This is her last day in the hospital. She doesn't need to be here. Post partum depression is not a hospital-worthy illness. I understand that your son is here, but she will only remain more depressed to be here on a constant basis. As the father of her son, I leave it to you to make suitable arrangements."
With that, the Healer turned on her heel, leaving a stunned Severus Snape in her wake. He was going to have to throw his pride out that door and talk to Dumbledore. It wouldn't do to have Hermione just anywhere for anyone to learn the truth. God forbid Rita Skeeter should find out and plaster the story all over the Daily Prophet. The Dark Lord would not likely be very understanding of the situation, either.
He stalked toward Hermione's room and was shocked to hear a male voice. His shock turned to anger when he opened the door quietly and saw Remus Lupin sitting on Hermione's bed, holding her teary face in his hands, his forehead resting against hers. It was all he could do to restrain his fury at seeing his Hermione in another's arms. It brought bad memories of Sirius Black to mind. Seeking to break them away from each other, he coldly said, "How cozy."
Remus jumped and looked up, letting go of Hermione's face. "You startled me, Severus," he said, standing.
Severus walked forward and hissed, "If you weren't feeling guilty, you wouldn't be startled, Lupin."
"Severus," Hermione said quietly. "Remus hasn't seen me in nineteen years. Do you honestly think that he is feeling guilty about something?"
Severus scowled, sitting on the edge of the bed. "Well, he did manage to make you cry," he said harshly. "Have you eaten breakfast yet?"
"No, she just woke not long ago," Remus volunteered.
"I'm not talking to you, Lupin," Severus said icily. "Hermione, I specifically told you to eat every meal. How can I help you if you won't help yourself?"
Severus saw Remus tense and open his mouth to speak when Hermione interrupted, saying, "How exactly can I eat breakfast when I only woke about fifteen minutes ago and haven't had a chance to order anything? I can't help myself when what I need isn't here."
Severus set the cream-filled tin down on the bedside table and stood. "I'll go speak to the Healers about having the rest of your daily meals ready for you in a timely manner. And you will make sure to eat after all of my trouble."
He turned around and shot Remus a dark look as he exited the room. As he closed the door, he saw Remus walking forward, no doubt to sooth Hermione from a sure onslaught of tears, when she said, "That man is the most difficult human on the planet. Honestly, how can I eat so quickly? Infuriating."
Severus smirked. She should have expected that. It wasn't as if he had changed much in that regard. He was as impatient now as he ever was. He avoided Healer Tate, choosing instead to terrorize a young Healer who was still training. He berated her and the staff as he demanded a meal be sent to Hermione immediately. The Healer ran all over herself, horrified at the thought of infuriating him anymore, and he was soon stalking back to Hermione's room with the Healer in tow, holding a plate of steaming food. He banged open the door, noticing Remus had not resumed his position on the edge of Hermione's bed. The werewolf was smarter than he had given him credit for.
"This tray contains sausage, eggs, and toast," Severus said, setting the tray down and withdrawing the small vial from his pocket. "I expect you to eat every bite. When you are done eating, I want you to take this Calming Draught. It will allow you to keep your mood swings under control until you are able to start using the cream I have mixed for you. Well, what are you waiting for? Eat!"
Remus sat down across the room as Hermione retorted, "If you are so hungry, why don't you eat? I don't like eating so soon after waking. It makes me feel nauseous."
"I am not eating because I have already had breakfast," Severus lied. "And you feel nauseous because you don't eat regularly enough. I thought you were supposed to be the most brilliant witch of your age? You should know a simple fact like that," he replied silkily.
Hermione scowled and opened her mouth to say something, but was silenced as Severus crammed a forkful of eggs into her mouth. She chewed furiously and said, "Don't treat me like a child. I can feed myself."
"Then don't act like a child and just eat," Severus snapped in annoyance.
Hermione finally finished eating between sharp comments, and Severus picked up the vial. "Make sure to eat regularly as it is important for nutritious breast milk. You will do this," he said severely. Picking up the cream, he said, "This is something for you to use before you sleep. Massage it into your feet, hands, and over any stretch marks. It will help you sleep and heal, and it is safe for the breast milk the hospital has been helping you extract for Aiden."
"Fine," Hermione huffed. "Hand the potion here already. How can I take it if you won't give it to me?"
Severus threw his hands up and almost rolled his eyes as he handed her the vial. "I am going to class now. I will be back tomorrow morning to escort you out of the hospital."
"Out of the hospital?" Hermione asked after swallowing the draught. "What do you mean? I can't leave! Aiden is still here. I will not leave our son here alone!"
"You will not be leaving him alone. He will continue to be cared for by the staff. It does him no good for you to stay here, feeling sorry for yourself. You will leave in the morning and get yourself well enough to care for him when the time comes," Severus snapped. Hermione dissolved into tears, and he felt a momentary pang of guilt. No, he refused to feel bad for insisting that she take care of herself. He walked forward and stroked her hair awkwardly, unsure of what to do or say. When she didn't respond, he stiffened and stepped away, turning to face Remus.
"You are her friend. Make her understand."
He walked out the door, hoping that Hermione would get over being so emotional all the time. He might care for her, but he had no idea what to do with weeping women. They puzzled him. He decided it was time to call on Narcissa for advice. Yes, that would do nicely. She was a woman with a child. She should be able to tell him how to handle this.
Ron had ignored Harry when he arrived back in the common room after his detention. He hadn't spoken to him since they had been at St. Mungo's. He was angry at Harry's harsh treatment of Hermione and didn't trust himself to be calm. Harry hadn't tried to speak with him either, obviously annoyed that Ron had taken Hermione's side.
He woke early and walked to Harry's bed kicking the mattress harshly, startling Harry out of a deep sleep. "We need to talk," he muttered.
"Now?" Harry said groggily. "What time is it?"
"Early. Get up. We need to talk," Ron said again.
Harry stumbled out of bed, dressed, and followed Ron to the common room. "What do we need to talk about so early?" he asked, yawning.
"Not here," Ron said, glaring at him.
Ron crawled out of the portrait hole, trusting that Harry would follow him. Harry did, and Ron made his way briskly to the Room of Requirement.
Once they were inside, Ron cast a Silencing Charm and immediately said, "What the bloody hell is wrong with you? How could you call Hermione a bitch like that? You prat!"
"Me? What about you? If it weren't for me, you would have been the one to scream at her! You were like a ticking time bomb. If I hadn't been there to calm you down, you would have exploded and been the Ron you usually are. I don't know who that bloke in the hospital was, but it sure wasn't the normal, selfish you," Harry spat angrily.
"Normal, selfish me? What is that supposed to mean? I was the one who held Hermione after you hurt her." Ron was shaking visibly as the veins on his forehead strained with his anger.
Harry's face was turning red as he shouted, "And how many times have I been the one to hold her after you hurt her? You are a miserable prat who has hurt her more times that I ever could or will."
"At least I never called her a bitch," Ron interjected.
"And I feel horrible about it, Ron, or haven't you noticed?" Harry said, calming a bit. "I got detention with Snape on purpose. Last night, I asked him what kind of spell he had put on Hermione to make her willing to touch him."
Ron's mouth dropped open in shock, and he fell into a chair the room provided for him. "You didn't? And you're still alive?"
"Surprisingly. He picked me up and slammed me against the wall, nearly crushing my throat with his wand. But Ron, Snape really loves her. He admitted it to me. He cast Legilimency on me and saw us in the hospital. He went ballistic when he saw me call Hermione a… a bitch." Harry sat in a second chair and dropped his head into his hands. "God, Ron. I was so horrible to her. I was just so mad that she would ignore messing around with the past by getting involved with Snape, but not at least hint to my parents what lay in store for them. I wanted to hurt her for being so selfish. But she wasn't really being selfish, was she? I'm a terrible friend. And now I can't even go apologize to her because Snape knows that we snuck out and is watching us."
Ron was unsure what to say. Normally, it was him in Harry's position, needing to figure out how to apologize. This twist of events was catching him completely off guard, and he suddenly realized what good friends he had.
"Harry," he said. "Hermione is smart. She'll understand when you explain to her what you were thinking. She probably already knows what went through your mind. Just talk to her as soon as you can. Send her a message with Hedwig. Explain yourself. Better yet, send her chocolate. Women love chocolate."
"Chocolate! That's a great idea, Ron! You're a genius."
Ron smiled widely. Hopefully, Hermione was in a forgiving mood. If she could love Snape, then surely she could forgive Harry. His smile faded. He still couldn't believe she would fall for him. He was going to have to get her to come to her senses somehow. She couldn't really love Snape.
Severus paused before the Headmaster's door after classes. He didn't want to talk to him just yet, but he was his employer. He would have to at some point anyway. Squaring his shoulders, he spat the password and entered, readying to knock on the door.
As his fist descended, the door opened of its own accord. Dumbledore was sitting at his desk.
"Ah, Severus. Please come in. We have much to discuss."
Wanting to snap, but deciding against it, he entered and sat down. "I need your help," he said without preamble. "Hermione is being dismissed from the hospital tomorrow morning, and I think you can agree with the fact that she can't go just anywhere. If the Dark Lord was to find out about her and Aiden, he would stop at nothing to get his hands on them, killing me the moment the opportunity presented itself."
Dumbledore contemplated the situation for a moment before saying, "Perhaps it would be best if she were to stay with you, Severus."
"Are you mad?" Severus asked. "A student living with her professor? The scandal would rock the school. The board would call for my immediate dismissal. There's no telling how they would react to finding out it was your suggestion."
"You are forgetting, Severus, that Miss Granger is no longer a student. She took the N.E.W.T.s at the same time as you did, tying you for the most ever received. So, you see, she is not your student," Dumbledore said calmly, leaning back in his chair.
"And how are we to explain having a child together? It would be obvious to those who don't know of the situation that she became pregnant during the last term, while I was still her teacher," Severus said harshly. "My resignation would be demanded immediately, and the Dark Lord would kill me since I would no longer be of any use to him."
"No, Miss Granger was only taking refresher courses as of halfway through last year, Severus. You are mistaken about the dates," Dumbledore said, waving his hand. A parchment shot from a drawer and into his outstretched hand. Handing it to Severus he said, "As you can see, I conducted the early testing for Hermione, myself, which is perfectly acceptable for a student attempting early graduation. Professor McGonagall verified the results, as she is certified to give examinations. Fortunately for Miss Granger, she turned seventeen last year in September. She was an adult by wizarding standards and able to make the decision to test out early. She has since been attending Hogwarts for refresher courses until an apprenticeship opened up. Professor Vector just informed me this morning that she was thinking of opening up an Arithmancy apprenticeship position at the end of the year. I asked her if she would be willing to take on Miss Granger now since she is ready for a position. Professor Vector is willing, if Miss Granger is agreeable to the idea."
Dumbledore sat back, eyes twinkling for the first time since Hermione had arrived back to the present time. He looked very pleased with himself as he popped a lemon drop into his mouth.
"You… you…" Severus murmured.
"I need to atone for the mistakes I made nineteen years ago, Severus. While you and Hermione also need to atone for yours, I feel that the two of you actually living together will more than suffice," Dumbledore said, offering the bowl of lemon drops to Severus.
Severus waved it away asking, "What is that supposed to mean?"
"You have obviously never lived with the woman you loved before," Dumbledore said knowingly.
Severus growled in annoyance as he stood up and walked to the door. "You are a meddling fool. Your 'benign' antics are going to explode in your face miraculously one day."
Slamming the door, he made his way to his quarters. Once inside, he nearly ripped off his cloak as he called out, "Dobby!"
"No, I refuse to go without seeing my son," Hermione said, putting her hands on her hips. She was the picture of defiance, but for the quivering lips and tear-filled eyes.
Severus felt a pang run through him at the sight. Will these emotions never let up? he wondered in exasperation.
"Miss Granger," the Healer began. "You can't visit today. Weekly maintenance is being carried out. There is a lot of spell casting and warding being done. It is imperative to your son's life that the process not be disturbed. Of course, you can come back over the weekend to see your son once we have determined everything is stable."
"No," Hermione insisted, tears rolling down her cheeks. "I won't leave until I have seen him. He needs to know I haven't abandoned him. He won't understand."
Severus was pulled in two different directions as both Hermione and the Healer began talking to him at once.
"Silence," he roared. "Hermione, you heard what the Healer said. It is unacceptable for you to enter the room today. Does Aiden's health mean so little to you? He won't even know you're gone. He's inside an artificial womb."
Silence reigned in the room after Severus' outburst until Hermione collapsed on the bed in tears.
"You could have handled that with a little more understanding," the Healer said, shaking her head at him.
Two hours later, Hermione finally arrived at Hogwarts. She had been silent since the incident at St. Mungo's, and Severus was beginning to worry about her. Perhaps he had been too harsh.
"Miss Granger," he said. "Are you well?"
"Must you constantly refer to me as Miss Granger?" Hermione snapped. "You've had sex with me. Or don't you remember? I think we've moved past that stage."
"I remember," he said shortly.
Dumbledore had seen to it that no one would be in the halls, and so Severus was able to get Hermione to the dungeons without being seen.
They entered his quarters, and she asked, "Where are we? This is not my room."
"Of course it's not your room. Did you actually think I would be escorting you to the Head Girl's room? As you are no longer a student, you are no longer the Head Girl. Your rooms have been given to the new Head Girl, Susan Bones. You will be staying here with me, in my quarters," Severus said as he removed his robes.
"Here? In your quarters? How in the world am I going to explain to my classmates that I am living with you?" Hermione exclaimed.
"Perhaps you should have thought of that before you decided it was acceptable to become involved with me when you ended up in the past," Severus said icily. "Your room is the first on the right. Get used to the idea. You will be staying here, as will Aiden when he is well."
Severus pointed to a hallway as he entered the first room on the left, leaving Hermione alone. She stood in the middle of the room for a long time, and, not knowing what else to do, she finally went into the room.
Flicking her wand, the room illuminated, and the first thing she noticed was a combination of Slytherin and Gryffindor colors. The walls were scarlet, and the trim was silver. It had an enormous four-poster bed hung with silver curtains made of silk. The sheets were also silver and made of silk. The comforter was a deep red and filled with down feathers. The furniture was mahogany and elegantly designed. She ran her hand along the comforter as she walked forward and opened the lavatory door. The floor, counters, and shower were rock. In the middle the bathroom was a huge sunken bathtub, big enough for four people.
She was overwhelmed and beginning to feel guilty for giving Severus such a difficult time. Opening the bedroom door, she crossed the hall to Severus' door, knocking on it lightly. Not hearing an answer she opened the door and peaked in. The room was tiny with just enough room for a full-sized bed and a wardrobe.
She stepped inside in stupefaction. He gave me his room, she thought wildly. As she stood looking around, his lavatory door opened, and a very naked Severus emerged.
.