Chapter 14: Don't Bring Me Down

"Everyone's telling me I'm crazy for dating you, Ryo-san," Kuramochi said as he sat on the school roof. He unwrapped his melon bread and took a vicious bite from it.

Ryosuke crouched down next to him, his lips curled. "Oh, really? Please elaborate."

"They all said that you're psycho and sadistic and just plain terrifying. Well… that's very true–"

"Very true?"

"Kinda true, but there's that nice and calm side of you that attracted me."

Ryosuke broke off a piece of Kuramochi's melon bread, holding it between his thumb and index finger. "If that was an attempt at flattering me, you succeeded. I appreciate your words."

Kuramochi grinned. Deep down he knew that his boyfriend was simple to please if you just used the right phrasing. Though sometimes he would dismiss it and make you feel like a complete idiot. Shaking out of his thoughts, he cleared his throat. "Hey, Ryo-san. What would you do if I said I wanted to marry you?"

Ryosuke felt his cheeks heat up and he coughed, turning his head away from his partner. "I'd have no reason to refuse, idiot. You're something special."

"Hyahaha!" The green haired male grabbed the pinkette by the arm and pulled him onto his lap. "Then in a few years from now, we are so going to get married, live in a big house and have lots of children!"

"Those are some pretty big dreams you got there. How are you sure we'll even make it to that point?"

The shortstop leaned down and brushed his lips against Ryosuke's, humming. "Because I have you, duh!"

Nodding, Ryosuke pushed him away and finally chewed the piece of melon bread he had been holding onto since the beginning. "Alright, we'll see. If we don't make it, I'll kill you. Understand?"

'Now's it's all gone,' Ryosuke thought as he stood in front of Kuramochi's body on the hospital bed, his fists clenching his sweatpants. 'This is all my fault. He's gone because I was jealous of something trivial. I feel extremely guilty now and there's nothing I can do to make up for it. He apologized numerous times, but I still rejected him because I was blinded with loneliness. Saying sorry wouldn't even… amount to the pain he must be feeling. I'm terrible…'

At the doorway, Miyuki and Eijun made eye contact as Ryosuke slowly began to break down, his body shivering as tears slipped from his eyes. Light sobs filled the silent room, instilling a heavy curtain of sorrow. 'We should leave him alone. He needs a moment to himself.'

Eijun was the first to speak. "Uh, Harucchi's brother… we'll l-leave now. Just know that we'll be praying for you."

"Mmm," Ryosuke choked.

With that, Eijun and Miyuki left the room and headed back to the entrance near the waiting room. The woman was still sitting there, fidgety as ever.

"You're not gonna go home?" Miyuki asked, signing out at the reception desk.

Mirai nodded. "I feel like I should stay for a while longer." 'I said I wouldn't take responsibility! Why am I still here?!'

The bespectacled male shook his head. "Young women like you shouldn't stay up too late, it's not good for your skin–"

A vein popping on his forehead, Eijun latched onto Miyuki and dragged him to the door. "Stop flirting with her and let's go! We left Kazujun all alone, remember?!" He shot a dark look at Mirai. "If I see you near my sexy husband, you'll get it!"

Miyuki sweat-dropped. "I wasn't flirting, baka! It's called being caring!"

"You can be caring in non-suspicious ways! Now let's go!"

Mirai chuckled. 'They're always loud.'

Eijun crossed his arms as they made their way down the hill from the hospital. An occasional breeze passed by, rustling the leaves on the trees. "I can't believe you were flirting! Right in front of my face, too!"

Miyuki scratched the back of his neck, slightly perturbed. "Listen babe, I was just being nice! Want me to go back there and ask for her number?"

"Hell no!"

"Alright then!"

The brunette huffed, pouting. "Not my fault your words can have different connotations."

"That's nice terminology; where'd you learn that?"

"I had the same college education as you did, Kazuya!"

"Wasn't sure if you'd be able to actually remember everything that you learned, anyway. All the times we had to do late night study sessions because you slept during class!"

"How'd you know?!"

"Your professor told me on the low."

"Damn you~"

Miyuki revealed his infamous shit-eating grin as he ruffled Eijun's hair, happily digesting his victory in the argument. "I feel so nostalgic right now. College days with you were the best."

Eijun rolled his eyes, hooking his arm around Miyuki's. "No, they weren't! Once I graduated Seido and went to go find my dorm on campus, I screamed because you were my roommate! You treated me like a slave!"

The bespectacled male rose a brow. "Really? Hmm, I don't remember anything of the sort."

"KAZUYA!"

"Calm down, calm down!" 'Oh… that's right. I understand now. Everyone used to call the both of us twisted. Something tragic would happen and we'd act like we were fine. We'd make jokes and lighten up the mood, but deep inside we were just as depressed as they were. We'd try not to let the negative emotions consume us, but after a while it'd strike us hard. So hard no one would see our faces for the next couple of days. It's sick, honestly. But we can't help it. I really do feel bad for Kuramochi… I hope he gets to rest in peace.'

Eijun blinked, sensing a change in his husband's demeanor. "Kazuya? Everything alright?"

Miyuki offered him a genuine smile. "Yeah. Now let's get home before Kazujun starts freaking out."

"Alright. If you say so." 'Mochi-senpai, why'd you have to leave first? I was supposed to go soon. Now I have to meet you in Heaven and apologize for being an idiot.' He grimaced at the sudden salty taste of blood bubbling in his throat, begging to be released. He had secretly vomited blood on his way to get Ryosuke and at the moment, he wasn't feeling quite good. A little light headedness but he was sure it would go away if he took his pills. 'I don't want to die yet… I can't… I have to take care of Kazujun and watch him grow.'

A nurse walked inside the room holding a clipboard to her chest. "Um, Kominato-san? I know this is strange, but it's sort of past visiting hours."

"I'm not moving," Ryosuke responded sharply. He laid his head on Kuramochi's chest, his fingers combing through his hair. "Your best chances of getting me out is if you drag me or call the police. I am not leaving."

The nurse sighed. "We have to abide by the rules~"

"Did you not just hear what I said? I'm not leaving. Would you mind giving me some privacy?"

The nurse, deciding that it was best not to fight a losing battle, nodded and left. "There are water bottles in the hallway if you need any."

Ryosuke sucked his teeth and focused on his fingers running through the green strands of Kuramochi's hair. Oh, how he wished to apply gel and style it for him again. How he wished to dry it with a towel when Kuramochi came back home on a rainy day again. How he wished to purposely bury his nose in his hair and slyly compliment on how lovely it smelled again.

The pinkette now realized all of that was gone. He didn't know how Kuramochi ended up this way, but he had a feeling that it was fault. Maybe if he was at home instead of drinking… his husband would still be with him. Breathing the same air as him. Sharing the same bed as him. Living with him.

Deep inside, he disliked that they had argued. Accepting Kuramochi's apology was a difficult thing to do because of his stubbornness. Of course he'd been lonely for two years, but it wasn't worth fighting over. Now it was too late to say sorry. The opportunity to utter such simple words were gone like the inability to express his emotions.

He was a blubbering mess, tears constantly dripping down his face and onto Kuramochi's chest, his nose and cheeks red. His heart felt heavy for the first time in his life and it was painful. Sorrowful. Detrimental. Sniffing, he moved his hand lower and intertwined his fingers with Kuramochi's, more tears welling up as he saw that the latter still wore his wedding ring.

'It's this bad,' Ryosuke thought, his eyes burning. 'I never thought I'd miss him this bad… what did I do to myself? What did I do to us? Why did I even think drinking and ignoring him was a good idea? Why?'

Swallowing nothing but air through the tightness in his throat, the pinkette slowly shook his head. "Youichi, I know it's too late… but I accept your apology. I'm also truly sorry about everything I said to you. I was troubled at the time; I didn't know what to believe. I know I'm not the best partner at times and that I tend to ruin things… but you still loved me unconditionally. It was my fault this happened… I'll take any punishment I deserve. As long as you'll forgive me… I'll be fine. I'm sorry."

Two minutes passed.

"What was I expecting? Not like he was going to resp–"

Beep… Beep… Beep! Beep! Beep! Beep!

Ryosuke's eyes widened as he tilted his head and peered at the heart monitor. The lines were no longer flat; instead they began to move up and across the screen. The numbers on the side increased also.

The pinkette was bewildered. He averted his eyes back to Kuramochi's hand which was rapidly regaining color. His index finger twitched. "Don't tell me…"

Ryosuke released a fresh batch of tears as he looked up at Kuramochi's face and saw his eyes flutter, then slowly open. Glazed eyes robotically stared at him, a small smile appearing on the green haired male's face. "R-Ryo… I was… waiting f-for you… to say that…"

"Youichi…?"