Chapter 14

Her hair looked so soft. Silky. The morning sun glistened off of each dark chestnut strand fanned out across the pillow. Her hair had always been soft, from the time she was a baby, to a little girl, and now to an adult with children of her own. She looked so childlike when she was sleeping. When she was a little girl, she had quietly entered her room while she was sleeping and just watched her sometimes. This tiny little human being that she had created. Her first born. She was a complicated one, always challenging her, perplexing her. Stubborn as a mule. Both her sons were so different, both eager to make her happy, but Hayley had always been different. There was a fire in her eyes directed at her. Deep down, Hayley threatened her. She would always take the most diametrically opposite view to her. She felt the need to battle with her constantly. They sparred about everything. It was almost comforting in an odd way.

Beverly gazed at Hayley asleep in her pale blue hospital gown with an IV taped to her arm. Hayley normally had such a large personality, but now she just looked so small and fragile. Much like she did when she was a child. She was overcome with a feeling of uneasiness. Normally she was quite objective about her children. She had raised them to adulthood, and now it was their responsibility to take care of themselves and live by their own decisions. It had nothing to do with her. Their successes were their own. Their failures were their own. She had no feelings towards either in that regard. But seeing Hayley in the hospital was making her feel nauseous. It was troubling her.

Beverly tentatively reached over to touch a silky lock. It was the same. The same as when she was a child.

"So soft" she whispered, as she gently stroked her hair. A tear gathered in the corner of her eye as she gazed at her daughter.

"What are you doing?"

Beverly snapped back her hand to her side and turned around startled to see Leonard standing in the doorway holding two steaming cups of hot coffee. He gingerly set the coffee down on the table beside Hayley.

"Don't wake your sister up. Come out into the hallway." Beverly stately coolly. She stood up, straightened her skirt, picked up a coffee and walked out of the room. Leonard followed her out into the hallway. He gave his mother a puzzled look. It was not like her to show any type of affection.

"What are you doing here?" Leonard asked again.

Beverly sighed. "Really Leonard. Why do you ask such obvious questions? I'm here to check on your sister, and to speak with her physician during their morning rounds."

"It's barely six in the morning. I came this early because I didn't want Hayley to wake up alone." Leonard eyed his mother's slightly disheveled appearance. She normally never had a hair out of place. "Were you sitting here all night?"

Beverly ignored Leonard's question, and took a large sip of the coffee that was meant for him. "They are discharging her today. I want to analyse their recommendations and see if I agree. You wouldn't understand the neurological impacts of some of the medications, it's too complicated for you to grasp Leonard." She raised an eyebrow and looked at Leonard whose irritation was evident. "Where did Michael stay last night?"

"I don't know mother. He's a big boy, he can take care of himself. Penny and I stayed in a hotel a few blocks away. Thanks for asking about us by the way" he muttered.

Beverly opened her purse and took out her compact mirror. She then carefully applied her lipstick. "Oh Leonard….you are such a needy child. I have no idea why you constantly seek validation. Do you want Mommy to give you a prize for booking a hotel? Really. I wish Michael were here. I can get more sense out of him."

"Oh yes, your golden child Michael. He can do no wrong in your eyes can he? Why did you always favour Michael so much? Was it out of guilt? Were you subconsciously trying to make up for your failings as a parent?" Leonard said pointedly.

Beverly glared down at Leonard. "Guilt? I have nothing to feel guilty about. Are you trying to psychoanalyze me? You are obviously trying to transfer your feelings of inadequacy and jealousy of your brother to unsubstantiated claims of poor parenting on my part. A sophomoric attempt Leonard. I clothed and sheltered you until you were eighteen. Perhaps you feel inadequate because you are. That's on you. I suggest you try to better yourself, instead of blaming your mother. That's what adults do."

Leonard threw his hands up in frustration. "Did it ever once occur to you that you, yes, you are part of the problem. Why Hayley feels like she is unlovable. Why Michael has lashed out in the ways he has. My desire to feel needed. You can't absolve yourself of any responsibility. We are your children, not your damn houseplants! You have to do more than feed and water us until we are eighteen. We needed to feel love and trust in our parents. That was missing for us, and is a large part of the reason why we are in the mess that we are in." Leonard started pacing around the hallway.

"Really Leonard – " Beverly started.

"You know, I'm trying to wrap my head something. In my head, I would think if I was a parent, and something happened to my child that completely traumatized them, I would notice. I would notice they were behaving differently. I might not know exactly what was wrong, but I would know that something was wrong. Am I crazy to think that way? But you didn't notice. Or did you? Is that when your favouritism came out to play? Why did you favour Michael so heavily?"

"What are you talking about? What are you insinuating?" Beverly cautiously whispered.

"Michael and Hayley couldn't reach out to you because there was no trust. They needed you and you failed mother. You failed horribly."

"I will not be spoken to this way." Beverly snapped. "You have no idea what you are talking about. No idea. You are not even a parent, yet you act like you know everything. You don't. " Beverly said angrily. "I don't have time for your nonsense. I need to make arrangements for Hayley."

"Michael and I are taking care of Hayley. We are staying with her at her house. We don't need your help." Leonard replied.

"I can come over and –"

"Don't" Leonard interrupted. "Just don't. Do us all a favour and leave us alone. We need time to heal. We need family right now, and our family is Hayley, Michael and I."

"Leonard, why are you behaving this way? I am merely –"

Leonard sighed and opened Hayley's door. "Goodbye Mother. Just let the three of us handle this." He looked at his mother's troubled eyes. "Please" he softly implored. Leonard entered Hayley's room and quietly shut the door.

Beverly leaned up against the wall. Her eyes filled with tears. Was Leonard right? Had she completely failed them? Her own children thought that she didn't love them, but they were wrong. She had done what she had thought was best. She wiped the tears from her eyes. Perhaps Leonard was right. She really had failed.

"I'm telling you, these accusations are completely without merit." Michael said passionately into his cell phone. "It was completely fabricated; there is no truth to it at all. Yes….yes. I understand that, but-" Michael sighed. He placed two suitcases carefully into the trunk of his car, moving the third small one to the side. "Is there anything I can do until the inquiry? Is that Harvard's policy?...Yes, I understand. Please keep me updated."

Michael hit end on his cell phone and stared out at his New Jersey childhood home. He gazed at brick and white house with a large porch in the front. Truth be told, it was a beautiful house. The home held so many memories, good and bad alike. When he lived there he just wanted to escape that house. It felt like a prison for him. The moment he reached eighteen he had moved out to live with friends off campus. Over the years though, the house was losing the power it once held over him. He no longer dreaded going there, and did once in a while to visit his mother. It had simply become a house. Four walls and a roof, but nothing more.

Michael turned his attention back to the car. He had arranged with Leonard last night to go to their home and pick up his and Penny's stuff, so that Leonard and Penny could accompany Hayley home without delay. He had gone to his and Emily's condo earlier that morning and collected his things. He knew that she had an early appointment for work, and that she wouldn't be home. He was thankful that he had not brought too many things from his place in Boston, so he was able to pack quickly. It was funny how quickly things changed. The woman he was going to marry in a couple days, he now couldn't stand to be in the same room with. Life changed so quickly sometimes.

Emily's attempt at ruining his career was proving to be rather successful. He was just informed that an official inquiry would take place to look into the allegations that had been made against him. He assumed that he would ultimately be found innocent, but the damage was done. The reputation that he had built up for himself over the years was gone. People would always wonder if the accusations were true, and think of it first before the accomplishments he had achieved in his academic career. His initial instinct was to lash out at Emily somehow, to drag her through the mud. But what good would that do? It would just start this to and fro that was bound to get endlessly nasty with nobody winning in the end.

If he was really honest with himself, he wasn't really looking forward to heading back to Harvard. It had been a huge goal of his to get where he was all these years, and now that he had accomplished it, he had been getting bored. He wasn't sure if academia was for him. He was good at it, but he craved excitement. That's why idea of entering politics had been so appealing to him. Working with all types of people, the rush of campaigning, making connections, changing the way we do things on a very real level. It stirred an excitement deep within him.

His phone had been ringing off the hook since all those gossip rumours were published online. It did not take too much sleuthing to discover that it was him they were talking about. The constant calls were already taking a toll on him. With each call he was growing increasingly frustrated at the situation he was in. To top things off, he had also made a number of calls to cancel wedding arrangements and venues. At this last minute, no deposits could be returned, and he was getting an earful from their wedding planner and a number of vendors. In particular, the American Museum of Natural History was demanding that he show up in person to discuss the cancellation.

It was still only morning and it was already turning into the most frustrating day ever. His cell phone rang, and the name Jeremy Smith popped up on the screen. It was his NYPD friend.

"Hello" Michael answered.

"Buddy. I managed to get you the information you were looking for. It wasn't easy though. Do you want me to text you the number?"

"Jeremy, you are the best. You have no idea how much this means to me. Yes, please text it to me."

"No prob. I'll send it to you right away. Let's catch up for a beer soon."

"Definitely" Michael replied as he hit end. A minute later a text popped onto his phone with a cell phone number.

Michael took a deep breath. His life was a mess but hopefully he could makes things right. He needed to do whatever he could to make things right. He stared at his phone for a minute and the clicked on the number.

"Hello?" a man's voice answered.

"Mitchell? My name is Michael Hofstadter, I'm Hayley's brother. Please…Please wait, don't hang up. You need to hear me out. The information you've been told about Hayley is untrue.…"

Hayley sat down on her light grey couch in her living room. It felt good to be out of the hospital and back home. Leonard and Penny exchanged a worried look as they sat with her in the living room.

"I don't want you to worry about anything. Leonard and I have it covered. I just want you to relax and enjoy being at home. Can I get you anything? A pillow, a book, water, a blanket? " Penny asked anxiously.

Leonard smiled at her and squeezed Hayley's hand. "Anything to make you comfortable Hale. It's just us, so just be yourself. Sleep, rant, cry…it's all ok with us."

Hayley smiled back at them. It was amazing that both her brothers and Penny rallied to stay with her. They had picked up her children, and they were up in their rooms getting settled in. She had been worried about coming back home. Facing Nate. Facing Phoebe and Daniel. What was she going to tell them about everything that had happened? She didn't know what was happening herself. All she knew that was that she couldn't go back to the life that she had been living. She had texted Nate earlier and told him that she needed some time to herself with the children. He had been oddly agreeable. She looked over at Penny who looked so eager to help her.

"A glass of water would be nice" she responded as she smiled at Penny.

Penny smiled back at her. "Sure thing. Are the glasses in the cupboard by the sink?"

"Yes" Hayley replied.

Hayley watched as Penny walked into the kitchen. The blender was still out on the counter. The blender. Her last vain attempt at making things work with Nate. It seemed so stupid in retrospect. What was she thinking? That a nice breakfast would somehow heal her marriage? It felt so embarrassing when she thought of her efforts and the fact that Nate had been rushing off to hook up with another woman.

The doorbell rang. Leonard jumped up and answered the door. Michael was standing there looking exhausted with three suitcases in front of him.

"Here, let me help you with those" Leonard offered. He grabbed his and Penny's suitcase. Michael brought his in. Penny put down the glass of water in front of Hayley.

"Leonard, you and Penny can stay in the spare room upstairs. Michael you can stay in the spare room on the main floor." Hayley suggested. Leonard grabbed the suitcases and headed up the stairs.

"Here, I'll help get us set up upstairs. Hayley do you need anything else?" Penny asked.

Hayley smiled at Penny. "No I'm ok thanks. You guys go settle in. I'll just catch up with Michael here."

"Ok" Penny replied. She headed up the stairs after Leonard.

Michael sat down next to Hayley and pulled her into a deep hug. "Oh, It's so good to see you out of that place. I never want to see you in the hospital again."

Hayley gave him a sad smile. "It's weird being home. It's my home with Nate, and everything has a memory attached to it. I mean it feels good to be home, but strange at the same time. I just can't believe it's over in a sense. It feels surreal."

Michael looked at Hayley concerned. "Hayley, are you sure you are ok being home? And with us staying with you? Would you rather stay somewhere else? I don't want you to feel stressed in any way."

"No..no. I think it's best that I am home. It's best for the kids too. I guess it's just a new reality that I have to get used to. There is no point in avoiding it."

"Well if you are sure. Don't feel bad if you change your mind. We can always figure something else out." Michael looked at Hayley and bit his lip nervously. "Hayley, I'm not sure if this is the best time, but I want to talk to you about something."

Hayley looked at him puzzled. "What is it?"

Michael took a deep breath. "I spoke to Mitchell."

Hayley could feel the blood leave her face and her fingers go cold. She had avoided thinking about Mitchell. It just made her feel sick to think that he thought badly of her. She just felt so foolish. First for trying with Nate, and then for loving a man who she was sure would never love her back. What had Michael said? Her stomach started churning. "What? Oh no…Michael what did you say? Did he talk to you?"

"Well he didn't want to. Emily had him really snowed, that's for sure. I told him that Emily was angry with me and was out to get all the people that I loved. I told him that she fabricated the whole story about you being obsessed with him. That the whole thing was untrue. We talked for a while, he believes me. I proved to him how the doctor that called him did not exist. I think he had a hard time believing Emily's story in the first place because of the strength of your friendship. I told him you were unwell, but I didn't go into great detail. He was quite concerned."

"You didn't tell him about my feelings did you?"

Michael squeezed her hand. "No. That's your decision. You need to do what is best for you, and only you know what that is. I do like him though. He's very soft spoken, but interesting. Genuine."

Hayley smiled softly. "Yes that he is."

"Well, he is probably going to contact you at some point. Hale, I'm so sorry for putting you through this." Michael sighed. Hayley looked at her brother. He looked absolutely exhausted. He had bags under his eyes, like he had not slept at all. He looked so sad and completely stressed at the same time.

"Michael, why don't you go lie down and take a nap. I'm ok here. I'm sure Leonard and Penny will be down soon, so you don't need to worry."

He smiled at her. "Are you sure? I just need a little rest, and then I'll be ok." He grabbed his small suitcase and started to head down the hall.

"Michael?" she called out.

He turned around and looked at his sister. "Yes?"

"I love you." Hayley smiled at her youngest brother.

He smiled back at her. "I love you too."

Michael started opened up his small suitcase in his room and took out his toiletry bag. He just wanted to brush his teeth and sleep for a few hours. He took out a t-shirt from his bag when he could feel a set of eyes watching him. He turned around to see Phoebe staring at him.

"Hi Uncle Michael" she said softly.

"Hi Phoebe" he replied. An awkward silence filled the air. She walked into the room and sat on the bed. She gave him a serious look. She was fidgeting around like she wanted to say something.

She took a deep breath. "Why did you hit my dad?"

Michael looked at her perplexed. What was he going to say to her? He couldn't tell her everything that happened. She was just a child. "Did he tell you I hit him?" he asked.

"Well no, but I overheard him talking about it on his phone."

"I shouldn't have done that. It's not right to hit people."

"He hurt my mom didn't he? He did something, and that's why she got sick. That's why he's not here and you and Uncle Leonard and Auntie Penny are here isn't it?"

"Oh Phoebe…" he whispered. "It's not that simple. I guess I got angry at him for hurting your mom. But I hurt your mom also."

"I told Auntie Penny not to trust you." Phoebe said flatly.

Michael sighed as he unpacked some more clothes onto the dresser. "Sound advice Phoebe. I haven't been the nicest person, that's for sure."

Phoebe twisted her hair. "Well, I knew you were up to something when you were snooping in my mom's phone. You're not a very good liar."

"Well maybe I am, but you are just very perceptive." Michael replied.

Phoebe smiled at his reply. "I like that. It's like I am a super spy or something." Her face went serious. "Are my parents going to get a divorce?" she said in a scared whisper.

Michael looked at her sadly. "Oh Phoebe….I can't say. That is up to your mom and dad. You need to talk to them about that."

Phoebe looked at Michael with wide eyes. "My dad is mean to my mom. I can see it. I live here every day. He makes her sad. She is happier when he's not here. I don't want her to be sad all the time."

Tears filled Michael's eyes. "Oh Phoebe. None of us want to see your mom sad. That's why we are here, to help make your mom feel better."

Phoebe gave him a sad smile. "Well, I'm going to keep my eye on you. But I definitely like you a lot better now that you've gotten rid of Emily. I really hated her."

Michael laughed and shook his head. "You and me both. How did you know about Emily? You seem to know everything."

"Well I am a super spy" Phoebe giggled. "Well I am going to go hang out with my mom." She hopped off the bed and headed towards the door.

"Phoebe?" Michael called out.

"Yes?" she replied.

"I'm going to earn your trust back. I promise you that." Michael said seriously. Phoebe gave Michael a little smile and ran out of the room.

"Well….that meal was interesting" Michael joked as he loaded the last dishes in the dishwasher. Penny and Leonard gave each other a look, and then stared at the casserole dish with blackened cheese.

Hayley smiled at Penny. "It's so sweet of you to cook tonight. I kind of liked the blackened pasta. It gave a nice crunch."

"It's not my fault. I'm not familiar with this kitchen" Penny protested. She tried in vain to scrape the cheese off the dish. "Hey Leonard…you helped too, I can't take all the blame."

Leonard laughed. "I think that pan a lost cause at this point. Let's just let it soak. How about we go relax in the living room." The four headed into the living room and sat down.

"The kids sure knocked out early" Penny stated.

"Yeah, I think the last few days has been hard on them. I think they are happy to be back home in their own rooms." Hayley answered.

Michael sat down and looked around the room at his family. "You know…it's been so long since we've hung out together. I honestly can't remember the last time that we did. Probably not since we all lived in the same house."

"I know…" Leonard said softly. "It feels weird….but nice at the same time. I kind of feel like we should be torturing each other or something."

Michael laughed. "Well, I'm game. Should we start with Leonard's crush on the mom from Family Ties, or Hayley's love of cheesy 90's hip hop?"

Penny started laughing and looked at Leonard. "Family Ties? Really?"

"I did not have a crush. She was just such a sweet mom…..and she had really nice hair. So shiny…" Leonard trailed off. "Wait what about you Michael? I seem to recall you and your friends trying to start your own boy band with your friends."

Michael started laughing. "Hey we managed to book a bar mitzvah once."

"And Skee Lo was a legend! He's not cheesy." Hayley protested.

"Didn't he have one hit?" Leonard laughed.

"When you create the perfect song, you don't need to write any more hits." Hayley countered.

"I'm not sure if I'm familiar with that song? Skee Lo? I haven't heard of him. Was he really big?" Penny asked.

"No" Michael replied.

"Yes" Hayley countered punching Michael in the arm. "Oh my God…I can't believe you don't know Skee Lo. I'm sure you'll recognize it if you hear it." Hayley looked at her brothers and grinned. "I'll get us started. I wish I was a little bit taller"

"I wish I was a baller" Leonard added.

"I wish I had a girl who looked good, I would call her" Michael grinned. The three siblings broke out laughing.

"I do know that song! It was on some car commercial recently. It is really catchy." Penny exclaimed.

"Penny, I have a whole world of songs to introduce you to….you're going to love it!" Hayley replied.

"Oh good Lord…..I have a feeling it's going to be a 90's hip hop revival at our place" Leonard groaned.

Penny grinned and winked at Hayley. She crossed her legs under her on the couch . "So…" she started mischievously. "Tell me which one of you is the smartest?"

The three siblings all looked at each other with a grin on their faces.

"Me!" they all yelled in unison. They started laughing again.

"Well, in all honesty, both my brothers are brilliant." Hayley said softly. They smiled back at her.

"I think if we are being objective, I think Hayley did the best on all her Christmas essays. Even though they enraged Mom, she still got pretty good marks on it. Plus she's a brilliant scientist, sister and mother. My vote is for Hayley." Leonard gently stated.

"I agree" Michael replied quickly.

"Well this is quite the love fest" Hayley blushed. "Leonard, we haven't seen you in so long. We heard about your paper. That's amazing. I'm so proud of you. It's really a brilliant idea you two presented."

"Thanks. I'm really excited about this, I really think we may be onto to something big. I'm in the middle of designing a new experiment towards testing this theory."

"Well…" Michael started. "I think what you've come up with sounds amazing, but I admit it. I really don't understand what you do Leonard. Physics was never really my forte. Is it true you really believe in multiple universes. Like in the movies?"

Leonard smiled. "Well, not all physicists subscribe to that theory, but I believe it. We like to call it the multiverse, or the many worlds interpretation in quantum mechanics. Basically, all possible alternatives or choices one could make are realized in and create a different universe. All possible paths in the past and present exist."

"Man…that is hard to wrap your head around . Like If I had made a different career decision that would create a totally different world in a sense where that choice was realized. But I am just one person and that was just one choice. There would be have to be an infinite amount of universes out there then. It's just so abstract. How do you even begin trying to prove something like that?" Michael shook his head. "I've never told you this before, but wow Leonard. What you do is exceptional. I'm really proud of you."

Penny squeezed Leonard's hand. "I'm really proud of you too. Not just for what you do at work, but for the person you are."

Leonard flushed red. "You guys…I'm not used to this praise. Maybe we should go back to making fun of each other…"

"You know…I think the multiverse sounds really romantic." Hayley said softly. "I like to think there is a world out there where all your dreams have a possibility of being reality. It's really beautiful in a way."

"I always thought so" Leonard said softly. He looked at Penny, Hayley and Michael. "I think we are all dreamers. It's nice to think of world where everything is perfect, but I'll tell you this. I wouldn't change my reality with having you two as my brother and sister, and you Penny as my fiancé for anything."

A/N: Sorry this chapter took me so long to write. I went on vacation since the last chapter, and then have been quite busy with life. I do have an undying love for 90's hip hop, as my playlist attests to. And yes Kaley Cuoco starred in that Toyota commercial with the Skee Lo song playing! = ) A special thanks to allanjay who informed me about universities "inquiry" procedure, and for encouraging me to start writing again. Thanks for reading and reviewing. This story will probably wrap up in about 3 chapters or so. Thanks!