NOTE: Another round of thanks to all you reviewers. I'm sorry I haven't had time to respond individually, but it's the end of the semester, meaning catching up on grading, semester test reviews, and making out semester tests. Oh, and keeping up with fanfiction (because you HAVE to do something for fun).

HAUNTED - Part 14

Carson sat back in his chair and rubbed his aching forehead. He was out of ideas and almost out of options. If Sheppard didn't keep something down soon, he'd have no choice but to put in a feeding tube. The colonel would not only hate that, but the feeling of helplessness that was currently fueling his severe depression would undoubtedly get worse. Nothing says "I'm helpless," like a feeding tube.

"Dr. Beckett?"

Carson startled out of his fog and looked up toward the door to see Teyla waiting on an invitation to enter. "Teyla, come in, lass. What can I do for you?" He stood as she carefully made her way to a chair and sat down facing him.

"I wanted to talk to you about John. I have talked to Elizabeth and she explained that one thing that is slowing down his recovery is his inability to eat without throwing it back up."

Carson nodded and sighed. "Aye, it is. Poor lad can't seem to hold much down for more than a little while, not even broth. It's making him weaker and weaker, which I think is making his headaches even worse. He feels so helpless and depressed right now, which is not helping matters at all."

Teyla nodded in understanding. "I may know of something that can help. When I was a child, I became very ill with something that made me unable to eat without vomiting for several days. My father made a drink for me that had little taste and no smell and I was able to keep this down in small amounts. It kept me from getting even more weak as my body recovered enough to heal itself. I have not seen it made in a long time, but several of the older ones still live and would probably remember how to make it. I would like to see if that is true and have some made for the colonel."

Beckett's expression lightened and he nodded enthusiastically. "Yes, yes, by all means. Anything we can get to stay in the colonel can only help. If nothing else, it will just make him feel better about making progress and a positive attitude can make a world of difference."

Teyla smiled, happy to be able to do something to help. "Good. I will ask Elizabeth to have someone take me to the mainland."

"Don't stay up on that leg too long. I don't want you putting yourself back in here."

"I will not be up walking very long and it is worth being tired to help the colonel." Teyla used the arm of the chair to push herself up and leaned against her cane.

"You should take Ronon with you," observed Carson .

Teyla nodded. "I will ask him. He wanted to see the colonel for a minute."

oOo

John could feel someone looking at him before he even opened his eyes. He tried to wait it out, not wanting to see anyone, and more importantly, not wanting anyone to see him.

"I know you're awake, Sheppard." Ronon's deep voice was surprisingly quiet. John opened his eyes to look up at the Satedan.

"Ronon . . . do you need something?"

Ronon stood with his arms crossed, staring down at John almost angrily. "You've given up."

John closed his eyes and sighed. "I haven't given up."

"Yes you have. Never figured you for a quitter."

"I haven't given up," John snapped. "I'm still trying . . . it just doesn't do any good. Everything I do backfires in my face. You just don't understand, I can't save him."

Ronon raised his eyebrows slightly. "Him?"

John looked confused, furrowing his brow as he rubbed the side of head. "I didn't say him, I said me. I meant me. I can't seem to save me." His head throbbed and his mind felt dull and hazy.

Ronon studied Sheppard for a moment, making the colonel decidedly uneasy. "I remember the Sheppard that fought the retrovirus tooth and nail and even managed to harvest iratus eggs when he was pumped full of enough drugs to kill him. I remember the Sheppard that stood up to a Wraith queen and lived to tell about it. I remember the Sheppard that –"

"Enough . . . Ronon, that's enough. I get it. So, now you're saying I'm not trying and that's why I'm so sick." Sheppard managed to push himself up into a sitting position, his face getting red with anger. "You think I want to be like this? You think I want to puke and pass out and sleep all the time?"

Ronon remained calm, watching Sheppard's growing agitation with a neutral expression. "I think you'll have to work to get strong again and you've quit working. You've given into the pain."

Sheppard was so angry, he could literally see red. He could feel the blood pounding in his ears and sharp pain beginning to stab into his temples and behind his eyes. He couldn't believe a member of his team was treating him like a petulant child. He pulled the covers back and swung his legs over the side of the bed, not really sure what he was doing, just reacting to the insulting comments.

"Colonel, what are you doing?" Carson 's annoyed voice carried loudly across the infirmary as he rushed from his office to stop his patient's progress.

Teyla hobbled along behind Carson , her face growing dark with anger as the doctor grabbed his patient's arm and began pushing him back into the bed. "Ronon?" She glared at the runner, certain that he had something to do with the colonel's current state. "What did you say?"

Ronon ignored her, but John responded almost breathlessly from where he'd been forced back into the bed. "He says I've quit. Is that what everyone thinks, that I've just given up?" He slapped at Carson 's hands as the doctor fussed with the covers.

"No one thinks that," said Carson, but he didn't sound very convincing.

Sheppard glared at them, his hands fisted around the blanket and his breathing rapid and harsh. "I haven't given up. I'm not a quitter and I better not hear anyone else saying . . . " John frowned, stumbling over the words and gasping as he brought his right hand up to his head. A blinding flash of pain raced through his head, bringing with it a rainbow of blinking colors as the sights and sound around him faded away.

Carson caught the colonel as he tensed and the suddenly slumped over, completely limp. The doctor leaned the Sheppard back against the pillows and straightened his form out into a more comfortable position. "Bloody fools," he muttered as he checked Sheppard's IV lines.

"Ronon, we should go. I think you have done enough." Teyla's expression was still dark and angry, her hope from earlier having dissolved very quickly.

"Hey, I just tell it like it is. You people are babying him too much, making him soft. Sometimes you have to be tough." Ronon was firm in his defense, but not angry. He knew Sheppard's friends meant well, but their coddling wasn't getting the soldier anywhere and it was time to take a harsher stand. He had expected resistance.

"Well, I'm not sure badgering a sick man who's suffering from severe depression is exactly the best course of action," argued Beckett as he turned away from his patient. He looked from Ronon to Teyla. "If you're still willing, you better head to the mainland before it gets late. I don't want you up on that leg too long."

Teyla nodded. "Of course I am willing. We will leave immediately."

"We?"

Teyla nodded. "Yes, we. Come with me and I will explain on the way."

Ronon frowned and, for a moment, Carson was sure he would refuse to go. But he finally shrugged his shoulders and began walking with Teyla out of the infirmary. Carson turned back to his patient and shook his head. "Guess I'd better check your blood pressure and make sure you haven't blown something."

Carson's radio chirped twenty minutes later. "Carson, it's Elizabeth . Teyla and Ronon just left for the mainland. I thought you'd like to know. Teyla told me about her mission . . . and about the trouble Ronon caused. How's John?"

Carson sighed. "His blood pressure is a bit high, but everything else looks okay. I guess it was just too much stress in his weakened condition. I don't know what Ronon was thinking."

"Try not to be too hard on him, he's just frustrated and trying to help in the only way he knows how. He comes from a different culture and they handle things differently."

Carson eased himself into a chair beside Sheppard's bed and rubbed his face, feeling the pull of the exhaustion that had been steadily increasing over the last few days. What little sleep he'd gotten the last week had been on a cot in his office, and it hadn't been much. "I know, but sometimes I just want to hit him over the head with something large and heavy, not that he would feel it."

"Maybe Teyla's broth or soup or drink or whatever it is will work."

"Even if he just keeps down small amounts a few times a day, it would provide a little nourishment to keep him from losing any more ground. If we could just stabilize things a bit for him, give him a chance to catch his breath, maybe he could start making some forward progress again."

"Let's keep our fingers crossed that Teyla's mission is successful."

"Aye, because if it's not, the next step is a feeding tube, and I hate to think where we'll go after that."

TBC