I do not own Naruto.
Another very early one. These are actually urban legends. UGH.
Title: Gossip
Challenge: Urban Legends
Words: 473
Characters: Three random genin, Orochimaru, Jiraiya, Tsunade, Gai
Bonuses: The Sannins, lack of curse words, glasses, and Maito Gai.
"He's a snake, plain 'n simple."
"Nope, he's a rat. A treacherous rat."
"Naw, I know what he is. He's a devil. I heard that his mother wished that if she ever did have another child, that she wanted it to be nothing less than a devil. Then he was born, and though he generally looked human, inside he was broken and wrong, and those eyes of his showed every bit of this. I heard even his own mother stood at her door and told him to never come back."
Laughs.
"Actually, I hear sompthin' like that, too. When he was born, he had horns, bat wings, a horse's head and forked tail, even! Someone pulled a forbidden jutsu out of their butts and changed him to look like normal though, else everyone wouldav known how evil he was at one glance."
"That'd be one time I'd be glad to have glasses. I could take them off whenever he's near."
More laughs.
"And what of those other two?"
"Shh, you can't talk about them. Theys normal enough, and one's the Hokage! You shut your trap about them or someone'll be callin' all of us turncoats."
"Well, you know what I hear about that perverted one? That he was supposed ta get married with some lady, and at the reception thems all got drunk off their—well, you know what—and were playin' hide and seek. Then when he couldn't find his wife, he gave up 'n decided that she got cold feet. Theys all left and he went on like before. Then, when some lady was cleaning the house they'd had their thing in, so found his soon-to-be wife's decomposing corpse in some –"
"I heard that one! She was ina trunk, right? She locked 'erself in!"
"Now that's just disgusting. The two of you need better things to do, really."
"Okay, okay, jus' one more. I heard that dear ol' Hokage was sunbathing one time in the sun—"
"Ya idiot, a'course in the sun!"
"You know what, I'm going home--give me my glasses back, you twit! Fine, fine, I'm sitting back down. Brat."
"Shut up! So she felt some bug on 'er cheek, 'n slapped it away. Then, she found she had a huge blister or pimple on 'er cheek, and it was all red 'n disgustin'. One way or 'nother, she hit it, maybe when she was washin' her face, or sompthin' and it popped open! 'N a buncha little spiders came crawlin' out! When she was in the sun 'er pores gots so big, that some spider laid eggs in 'em!"
Gagging noises.
"That's disgusting!"
"Yeah! Thas really gross."
"Hello, dear students! Is it storytime? Can I join in on the fun?"
Stifled chuckles.
"Hello, Gai-sensei. Could you stand up? I think you sat on my glasses."