He walks out, she knew she had hurt him and she should have never said that. She walks into the bedroom and turns on her lamp " I am sorry I never wanted you to see me having one" , she could see the pain in his eyes. " They started my sixth night in Italy, Sal heard me screaming and broke my door trying to get in, that is why we were so close he slept with me every night".
"Why didn't you tell me Bay, I can't even imagine why you would keep that to yourself" he held her hand, " I knew you would have come, but you had started school, we would talk and I would feel so much better".
" How many times Bay" he signed. " I don't know in my old sketch pad I have it written down, when I would have one I would sketch something and write down the number, please forgive me for saying that to you".
He walked out of the bedroom and went get it, he walks back in and hands it to her. She starts at the back and is flipping pages, " forty nine with tonight's, it has been about three weeks since I had one".
" I have one question please answer it" he signed, " how many did you have there, how many since you've been back".
" How about we talk about it tomorrow, we both need to sleep, you know Eli wakes up at six every morning" she signed. He just looked at her, he loved her so much he thought she was healed.
"I did not have a clue how bad I hurt you, I have told you this so many times please know that I am so sorry" he laid down. She held his hand, " you haven't told me that you forgive me, I need to know that we are all right", she signed.
"You know that I forgive you for everything, I just kept on breaking what was already broken".
"Would you mind if I laid down with you , please just hold me" he put his arms out and she laid with her head on his chest. He held on to her so tight, "I love you so much" he said. She picked up her head and kissed him, "I love you too".
He woke up in the same position as he went to sleep, he kissed her head he picks up his phone it was five thirty, he just had to think about what he should do. He tried to get out of bed with out waking her but it didn't work, she looks at him " what time is it" she asked. "Its almost six, I was going to go and start getting his breakfast ready".
They got out of bed and she walked up stairs use the bathroom and get a change of clothes for Eli. When she walked down he had coffee brewing and he was making grits. " I will go into the room and pump then we can talk".
She goes into the room and the baby was up, she takes him into the living room and changes him and puts him in his hi chair.
When she comes out Emmett and Eli are in the living room, she goes fix her some coffee. He puts him on the floor with a movie and turns to Bay, " will you tell me now" .
She took a drink " I had nine in Italy, I know that if I had talked to you we would probably be married now, and I am sorry for that ".
"But it doesn't change what happened, I love you but I am scared, I need to know that I can trust you"
" You are going to have to baby, because I will never let you sleep alone again " , he pulled her in for a hug. " I know that it was from when he went to your house, why didn't you talk to me and tell me how you were feeling ". She just sat there, and drank her coffee.
"How many people have you told about this " he asked. She was shaking her head no, "Bay you see a counselor twice a week" she was still shaking her head no.
"Make an appointment and I will go with you, how do you expect to get better if you won't talk about it"
"Emmett if you had not been there last night you still would not know " she signed. " How did your mom not know how could you have kept it a secret".
She started crying " last night it was a bad one I have only had three that were horrible" , he was sitting there waiting , " the first one ,the last one and " she stopped. "Bay always the truth please tell me".
They sat there for a while " the hotel in Chicago, they called the police they thought something was happening to me, but I told them it was just a nightmare".