Chapter Fourteen – Reflections

"You've got to do something Geoff," David insisted as he walked through the door to the base. "We need another pilot."

"I called in a relief pilot, we got one," Geoff returned in frustration. "On what grounds do I say we need another one?"

David threw out his hands in exasperation. "The man is not doing his job," he suggested.

"He is flying the plane isn't he?" the clinical department head returned.

"Yes but that-" David began to protest.

"He is coming on time, respond to calls, log everything that needs to be logged," Geoff interrupted him.

"He's an arrogant bastard," the younger doctor replied angrily.

Tom gave a low whistle as he entered the base from the hospital after installing Maggie Davies in a hospital bed.

"Captain Potts doesn't think it's in his job description to carry the stretcher or any of the medical bags. He doesn't assist in any way," David explained.

Geoff looked at Clare who only shrugged.

The only thing he actually does is flying the aircraft," Annie filled in.

Tom sighed. "Pilots. They're only causing trouble," he mused tiredly.

"Why, what's Gerry done?" Annie asked.

"He's-" Tom trailed off and shook his head. "Never mind. I think he's thinking of leaving us."

"What?" Kate asked as she walked around the corner from the radio room. "No, no and leave us high and dry with Potts?"

"One would think Potts, with all his experience, would be an excellent pilot," David complained. "But he's not able to fly the aircraft optimally. Both Sam and Gerry does it much better."

Kate sighed as she sat down heavily on the chair next to Clare. "I miss Sam and Emma," she said.

"Bottom line is," David argued. "We have to get rid of Potts and talk some sense into Gerry."

They all glanced in the direction of the door as it opened to reveal Father Jacko.

The priest took off his hat and the cheerful smile on his lips died away at seeing the unhappy faces before him. "Well," he began slowly. "I thought I was the one coming from a funeral."

The mood instantly got lighter in the room. Clare brightened as she turned to him and Kate chuckled.

"It's a little crazy around here," Geoff admitted wearily. "I'm sorry I missed you earlier. Did Brian get home all right?"

Jacko nodded. He'd been staying at the Maple Hodges and offered his services, not only as a priest but as a counselor. He'd been up for several nights and talked through the accident with various members of the family and their ranch hands. Jennie had been travelling back and forth from the farm and Crossing to visit the children, buy supplies and try to coordinate everything till the point that she'd gotten exhausted so Jacko had kindly offered to fly into town, pick up some groceries and take Brian and the remaining kid back with him in the aircraft as they were to be released from the hospital.

"He got home all right," the priest echoed and narrowed his eyes at the chief medical officer. "Of course he did. With my flying and my connections-" Jacko trailed off and tilted his head upwards as he theatrically threw out his hands in the air. "What could go wrong?"

David shook his head and sighed, remembering the landing he'd seen Jacko perform at Steve Patterson's place the year before.

"I gave him some advice, talked about the weather, and told him God forgives," he explained lightly. "I think the young bloke will be just fine."

"Thanks, Jacko," Kate said happily as she walked up to him and gently squeezed his shoulder. "You're just what the Maple Hodges' needed."

"I'm glad I was in the neighborhood," he let on. "How are you faring?"

Kate sighed and glanced at Tom who shrugged. "We're coping," she said truthfully. "Gerry is getting better for every day."

Jacko nodded. "Good. Would it be okay for me to see him?" he asked carefully.

"Why don't you wait until tomorrow?" Tom suggested. "He needs to rest and you need to go over to Vic and Nancy. They've been wondering when you were going to show up for days."

The priest glanced around the room. "Would any of you like to join me for some food?" he asked.

There was a chorus of yes and light laughter as they started to close down the office for the day.

OOOOOO

Tom Callaghan sighed as he sat down in the old and worn armchair situated in his single room over at the Majestic Hotel. Numb and tired after the long day he closed his eyes and leaned his head against the backrest. His thoughts whirled in his head and despite being tired he felt restless.

Maggie Davies, Kate, Geoff and Jack had, in more or less subtle ways, asked him about Chris. He found himself wondering about her too, how she was and what she was doing. He wanted to call her but he didn't know what to say. His thoughts went to Gerry and what he'd been through, how the pilot's life had seemed to seep through his fingers. Then, involuntarily, his mind traced back to Gibbo, his former colleague, roommate and friend and a sudden feeling of regret crept over him as he had never had a chance to say goodbye. He didn't want his friendship or romantic interest in Chris end in the same way. It was with sudden clarity that Tom realized that life wasn't waiting, life was happening now and could end at any second.

Tom reached into his wallet and fumbled with the scribbled note of the phone number and began to dial. He steeled himself, silently hoping she would pick up the phone. He sighed as nervousness washed over him.

"Randall's residence," a soft female voice answered.

Tom felt his mouth go dry. "Hello, Chris," he managed.

"Tom," she exclaimed in cheerful surprise. "I wasn't expecting to hear from you anytime soon."

"No," he mumbled sheepishly. "Look, I wanted to give you a call and see how you were doing."

Silence settled over the line for a moment but it wasn't awkward. His lips curled faintly upwards as he pictured her with a mischievous smile on her lips.

"Dad's stubborn. I haven't been able to talk any sense into him," she admitted, frustration seeping into her voice.

"So that's where it comes from," Tom stated lightly. "You can be pretty stubborn to."

Chris chuckled. "It's a blessing and a curse at the same time as you know," she replied.

He absentmindedly twiddled his fingers, his eyes focused on the worn picture of her sitting firmly in his lap that he kept on top of the drawer.

"Look, I never had the chance to say goodbye," he managed in a tight voice filed with mixed emotions.

"I didn't want to say goodbye," she explained quickly. "It wasn't meant as goodbye, Tom."

He felt his hope rise. "So you're planning on coming back?" he asked.

Chris let out a deep breath and sighed. "No," she whispered tiredly. "At least not right away. Dad is special to me. I want to take care of him for whatever time he has left. Then I-" she trailed off, her voice got a rough edge with a brittle touch that he'd never heard before. "I don't know, Tom. I need time on my own, time to sort out my feelings and time to find myself again."

"I've never pictured you as a lost soul," he said lightly. "You've always known what you want. The toughest female doctor in the outback."

"I don't know about that," she let on.

"How are you holding up?" he asked bluntly.

"What do you want me to answer? The only family I've left is terminally ill," she replied in exasperation.

"Is there something I can do?" he said carefully.

"No, I've got to sort this out on my own," she reasoned softly. "So, how's it going back there? Treated any twisted ankles?"

Tom hesitated, not wanting to burden her with more bad news.

"That many, huh?" she teased.

"We came within an inch of losing Gerry a little over a week ago," he said somberly.

"No," she whispered.

"It's all right, Chris. He is going to make a full recovery. It's just that when it hits so close to home it gets you thinking," he mused.

"Yeah," she said shortly and then added melancholically; "You weren't there when we buried Dave. You moved away from me, he went to greater lengths and died to get away from me."

"Chris," Tom began kindly.

"I cried myself to sleep the night after. I've never felt so lonely in my entire life. But they say such things makes you stronger. I contemplated moving back to Sydney but Geoff and Kate convinced me to stay. Then DJ and Sam came along and together we made the best of teams," she said.

"When I first arrived to Africa I was excited and eager to go to work. I got through the first day fairly well but my mind kept coming back to the one person that I lost, not the ten I saved that day," Tom mulled dejectedly, his eyes glazing over as he thought back at the camp. "The next day began like the first. People kept coming, we ran out of supplies but this time we even ran out of water. I did everything I could but they kept dying, they looked at me, hoping for a miracle and I did too."

"You're just a human, Tom. You can't save them all. I know it's hard to hear and even harder to accept but that is the only way if you want to move on," she said in a subdued voice.

"I thought about you," he managed. "I had a picture of you in my tent."

Silence settled over the open line for a moment until Chris finally broke it.

"I waited for you to call, to do something more than sending a few postcards occasionally. At times it seemed like you'd disappeared from the face of the earth," she said with a tinge of bitterness in her voice. "I kept thinking about you but in the end memories of even the good times fades to be replaced by new ones of other people and other places. Just when I finally thought I'd gotten over you, after beating my cancer, after returning to life and work, you accidentally ended up as my patient. To hear that you'd been so close for several months without telling me-" her voice quivered ever so slightly.

"I'm sorry," he whispered regretfully. "I didn't expect you to still want to talk to me."

"I fell for you a long time ago, Thomas Callaghan, and I fell hard," she whispered softly.

"You awoke something in me that I didn't know how to handle," he admitted. "You still do."

"It's never too late, Tom. It's just a very bad timing at the moment," she confessed. "I can't deal with that right now. I need to be alone."

"I'll be here for you whenever you need someone to listen," he assured her kindly.

"Thanks," Chris said gratefully. "Take care, Tom and say hello to the others for me."

"I will," he promised.

OOOOOO

"Hi," Gina greeted cheerfully as she found her brother up and about in the corridor. She turned to Annie who was walking behind the pilot. "Should he be up?" she asked skeptically.

The young nurse nodded curtly, weary of the snobbish woman. "As long as someone is with him," she informed casually.

"You know, he is standing here too," Gerry spoke up in mild annoyance.

Gina crinkled her nose mischievously at him and made a face before she turned serious and turned to Annie. "Look, I think an apology would be in order."

The nurse looked surprised, caught off guard by the statement. "No," she said and shook her head and broke into a dazzling smile. "It's okay."

"Well, I am sorry anyway," the tall, good-looking woman said. "I can be a bit difficult when anxious and tired."

"Have you hit your head or something?" Gerry teased lightly.

His kid sister slapped him playfully on the shoulder. "Just grown up," she let on enigmatically and switched subject. "Maybe I should come back later?"

Annie shook her head. "There is no need. We were on our way back to bed anyway," she explained.

"Charming," the pilot murmured and grimaced as he turned too quickly.

Both women hovered near him instantly. "I'm fine," he assured them and then added; "One day I'm going to laugh at this."

"You're getting better for every day," Gina said cheerfully.

"That's the general idea," Gerry returned dryly.

Five minutes later he gingerly sank back into the pillow and closed his eyes in exhaustion while hurting all over the place.

"I'll leave you two alone," Annie said kindly.

"I'll leave when visiting hours are over," Gina assured her and watched with satisfaction as the nurse walked away.

"Why are you still here, Gina?" Gerry asked tiredly.

His sister turned to him in surprise. "What do you mean?" she asked.

"I'm not a child. I don't need a babysitter," he replied in frustration.

"Stop pouting, Gerry. It doesn't suit you," Gina returned in tight voice.

When the pilot opened his eyes they were cold and hard. "Just go, Gina," he said sourly.

She hesitated for a moment and stubbornly crossed her arms over her chest and fixed him with a stare. "No."

Their eyes locked in a staring contest.

"You didn't leave me then and I won't leave you now," she said with finality.

"I don't need you here!" he exploded.

"I'm not leaving!" she returned, her tone of voice matching his. "I don't care if you want my help or not. You'll have it anyway."

An awkward silence settled over the room and Gina wondered how long it would take before the medical staff came around and ushered her out.

"You scared the hell out of me," Gina finally managed in a low and calm voice. "You are the only one that I have left. How do you think I felt when I got that call from Doctor Callaghan?"

"You told me," he muttered dourly.

"What's wrong with you anyway?" she yelled in frustration and then bit her lower lip to stop it from quivering. "You survived."

"What's going on here?" Tom Callaghan asked, looking from sister to brother and then back again.

Gina threw out her hands in exasperation and sighed while Gerry glanced out the window.

The doctor gently took the woman by her shoulders and led her out of the cubicle. "Come on," he whispered kindly.

Gina let out a quivering breath as they walked out in the corridor. "Why is he so-" she trailed off in frustration. "-ungrateful."

"Look," Tom reasoned. "He's been through quite an ordeal. It's a normal reaction to most people."

"I must have been such an ass," she whispered sadly, causing Tom to frown.

"Why don't you and I walk over to the pub and have something to eat?" the doctor suggested kindly. "I think you can use it."

Gina hesitated and sighed as if gathering courage to tell him something. "Six years ago," she began hollowly and swallowed. "Six years ago I was addicted to drugs and I was drinking. I'd lost faith in life and I'd stopped caring. My brother never gave up on me. He patiently waited for me one day, threw me in the car and checked me into a home. I was furious with him and told him to go away, that I never wanted to see him again," she explained as tears started to trickle down her cheeks uncontrollably.

Tom gently embraced her. She buried her head into his white coat and sobbed.

"It's okay," he whispered.

"I love my brother," she whispered. "I drove him away and when you called to tell me where he was I was overjoyed then when you told me he was injured and that there was a possibility that he would die I freaked out. I scrambled a few things in a bag and took the car. It turned late and I got desperate. I even got onto a plane," Gina trailed off and chuckled bitterly as she straightened to look him in the eye. "I'm terribly afraid of airplanes. They've always made me feel uneasy but when dad died in a plane crash-"

"It's okay, Gina," Tom repeated softly as he led her toward the entrance doors.

OOOOOO

To be continued