XIV: Like Family Again
Gaara finds being Kankuro's younger brother an odd experience.
1. He finds it very similar to how Yashamaru used to treat him.
There are enough differences to stop Gaara from wanting to curling up in a corner and cry - but it is still similar. He remembers what Yashamaru's smiles used to be like, though, and there's something subtly different in Kankuro's and Temari's... and it's enough for him to trust them. Because this time, love seems real.
2. He's never been a younger brother before.
Although technically Gaara's always been one, he knows there's more to being a younger brother than just blood. He wishes he knew what that was,no matter how much Kankuro says it doesn't matter, because he already is.
3. Gaara is the more experienced shinobi.
He knows it, and his brother knows it too. But Kankuro still gives him advice, and Gaara still takes it (most of the time). Do all younger brothers get this kind of guidance?
4. Gaara wants to protect him.
He only wanted to kill him before, so that's an odd experience in of itself.
5. But he also wants to be protected.
On an intellectual level, he knows he's the stronger of the two... but he wants to feel like he's being cared for again. He missed that.
6. Kankuro looks a lot like their father.
When he isn't wearing his kabuki paints, anyway. It's a very... odd feeling for Gaara, to see Kankuro and be reminded of what he hates so much, but at the same time the warmth he's come to associate with his siblings and never thought he'd feel again. Kankuro understands as well - that's why he continues to hide his face.
7. He has gotten Gaara acquainted with "sarcasm".
Gaara's surprised to find that he's rather good at it, mainly because he can keep a perfect straight face. His brother muttered something about him having a lot of practise. He's pretty sure he answered with something snarky, but Gaara can't remember what it was, because the important thing at the time was to change the guilty look on Kankuro's face for something else.
8. Kankuro trusts him not to kill him.
Nobody has done that - well, hadn't done that, not before. And Kankuro was one of the ones he threatened the most. Yet now... he trusts him. Completely. He's not sure how he's supposed to deal with that.
9. He forgave him too easily.
At least it seems that way to Gaara. After threatening him, terrifying him for as long as Gaara can remember - Kankuro forgives him for it. Within months. He thinks Kankuro's forgiveness is real, but this doesn't stop the fear he has of it being taken away again, and the desperate hope that it never is.
10. Kankuro seems to think that Gaara should forgive him.
Gaara would in a heartbeat, of course. He just can't think of anything to forgive him for.
11. His brother is willing to die for him.
He almost did. Nobody has ever shown they cared that much before.
12. Gaara doesn't want him to do that.
He never used to care about the lives of others, but now the thought of how close Kankuro came to dying really... hurts. He wants his big brother to stay.
13. He needs help.
This is something Gaara had never needed before, either, or at least never wanted - but being the Kazekage requires more than the ability to kill. He finds it strange, that Kankuro is so willing to help him, but he appreciates it nonetheless.
14. He used to be able to terrify Kankuro with a glare.
Now, that exact same glare will just get him a smirk and (occasionally) ruffled hair. He's not sure what the difference is, but he's glad Kankuro isn't scared of him anymore.
15. He hasn't been criticised before.
Nobody dared. But now, sometimes, when he says something, Kankuro will reply, "That's stupid, Gaara." It annoys him immensely, but he doesn't really mind. Annoyance is better than what he had before.
16. Kankuro can confide in him.
Gaara thinks this is the oddest thing by far. It is one thing for his brother to trust him not to kill him - it is quite another to trust him with things like secrets and worries. Things that have no presence in the physical realm are all the harder to hold on to. Gaara knows this best of all, and can't quite believe that Kankuro is giving them to him so easily. He treasures them, all the same.
17. For once, they are equals.
Kankuro doesn't defer to him anymore, even though, technically, Gaara actually does have authority over him now. His brother doesn't seem to let this get in his way of them being a family, or caring for him. Gaara is so grateful for this that it makes him want to cry, but he doesn't, in case Kankuro starts worrying about him.
18. He hasn't seen Kankuro care about anyone like this before.
Not even Temari. Their relationship is different but similar at the same time; they still love each other, but Temari refuses to be protected by anybody. (Kankuro wouldn't dare ruffle her hair, either.) The differences are what make them family, so he doesn't mind.
19. Gaara was born to be a weapon.
He's not supposed to have family.
20. Kankuro is normally so stubborn.
He has confessed that he used to think of Gaara as a weapon, too. Gaara isn't sure how he managed to change his mind, but he's glad he did. He wouldn't give up his older brother for the world.
A/N: This took me a while because I found it kinda hard to get inside Gaara's head. Also, this was originally going to be from Kankuro's POV, but that was harder. XP Not sure when I can get another one up, I think the next few are going to be difficult for me. I'll do my best!
If you're interested, there's also a sort of tie-in story for #6 called "Family Resemblance".
Aaaannd... The Two Of Us now has 50 faves! Thank you everyone who keeps reading this, that's what makes it worthwhile! I hope you all continue to enjoy it. :)