Times in the life of Saul Ramkin-Vimes and Samantha Vimes

by Seiya234

What if Sybil Ramkin was born Saul Ramkin, and Sam stood for Samantha as opposed to Samuel? So, Various incidents in the lives of Sir Saul Ramkin-Vimes, his wife the Commander of the City Watch, Duchess of Ankh, Lady Samantha Vimes, and their daughter, Little Sam. Massive new chapter at 23! (and smaller one at 29)

14. Society

It never failed to surprise foreign dignitaries [1] when instead of His Grace, the Duke of Ankh, Lord Saul Vimes and his wife they got instead…

"Her Grace, Commander Samantha Vimes, Duchess of Ankh, and her husband Sir Saul Ramkin-Vimes."[2]

And then Vimes had the temerity not to show up in a dress but in her Watch brazen classless woman didn't even wear a skirt in place of breeches, or heels in place of boots.[3]

And when it came time for dancing-well. It just looked positively indecent, two people in men's clothes dancing. And one of those dancers was Ankh-Morpork's formerly most prominent confirmed bachelor, and the other was a woman who clearly didn't know her place as befit her gender and then this was usually when people decided to take a break at the punch bowl.

—-

Sam, when she realized after her first dance why everyone was so discomfited, made sure to not quibble when she was announced as the Duchess of Ankh, and put extra effort into shining her dress armor, to make it that much more noticeable.

Then Saul decided to join in on the fun by only choosing ties, cravats, and the like in soft pastel colors, like seafoam green and delicate pink.[5] Lord Rust turned purple in the face the first time he saw Saul in his new colors, but then touched his crooked nose and decided to go to the other part of the room instead.

So of course, Sam then had to one up him by adding a tie to the nice shirt she wore under her stupid dress armor.

They decided to leave it at that when Saul added a carnation to his outfit, to prevent a total meltdown of the high society of Ankh-Morpork.

If Sam had to participate in all of this stupid fuss and muss, then damn if she couldn't wring some enjoyment out of it.

Besides, it wasn't like Lord Vetinari said anything, other than raise an eyebrow of slight inquisition.

So Saul showed up to every function, dance, and event in light green or pink accoutrement, and Sam made sure that her dress boots were as big and chunky and in no way delicate as possible, and together they both enjoyed the sight of snobs trying to hide their utter revulsion.
—

[1] and the ton of Ankh-Morpork, practiced in willful ignorance when it came to Commander Sam Vimes

[2] and didn't people titter and mutter at that. Though after Saul rearranged Lord Rust's nose, people now thought twice about saying anything to Saul's face

[3] though it was the dreaded dress armor. Vimes had fought long and hard against it until Saul pointed out that unfortunately, as both the Commander of the Watch and the Duchess of Ankh, she HAD to dress up a bit.[4] So she had the stupid gilt armor, but she managed to argue the rest down to a nice pair of black breeches and a white shirt, with new boots.

[4] It was almost worth it though, when Sam stepped out for her first engagement in the whole rigmarole and Saul just gaped at her for a minute before taking her in his arms and simply saying "You look beautiful, Samantha Vimes."

[5] "Saul, people were originally made dukes and duchesses for winning wars. They sure as hell didn't do it in an embossed breastplate."