Lightsabre
Author's Note: Sorry for not updating, I am struggling with ideas as I am running out, i am also scrapping the mind swap idea because it's a terrible idea, I need you guys like Midnight Luna to review and give me funny ideas
Three stormtroopers were waiting outside the entrance of the imperial complex's main elevator
"Hey do you guys ever wonder how we can't seem to hit a thing with these?" a stormtrooper asks
"NO! Now Shut up!" another of the threesome exclaims
"YOU!" Darth Vader exclaims as the elevator door opens
"NOT IT!" two of the threesome exclaim
"You have failed me for the last time!" Darth Vader exclaims
"Which one of us?" one of the trooper asks
"YOU! You were, um, questioning me" Darth Vader said
"Look, the important thing is that I get to try out my new, LIGHTSABRE!"
"Behold the instrument of your demise" Darth Vader says as he pulls a Lightsabre out of a package he was carrying
"Oooo, Bubble wrap" Darth Vader said as he started playing with the bubble wrap
"Alright guys, what's the plan?" the unlucky storm trooper whispers to his side
He then turns left and right to see that both of the other storm troopers were missing
"Oh, Wow. It has eon two pain crystals" The trooper said as he read the instruction manual
"That, That is Awesone" The other trooper said as he took a wire out of the package
"Oh dear" The unlucky Storm trooper says
"Fusion cores not included, huh" The storm trooper said as he continued reading the instruction manual
"Oh nevermind, pass me the adaptor" Darth Vader asks as the Stormtrooper passes him the wire and he plugs it in
"You have failed me for the last time!" Darth vader says as he ignites his new lightsabre to reveal a bright pink blade
"Pink?! I can't kill anybody with pink! What am I gonna do?! Wuss you to death?!" Darth Vader exclaims
"Oh thank goodness!" The unlucky storm trooper says
"Says here you can change the colour" The Storm trooper reading the manual says
Vader's lightsabre blade suddenly turned green
"Ah, Here we go, green. Green is a killing colour" Darth Vader says
"It says that sea foam" The storm trooper reading the manual says
"Sea Foam? Red?" Darth Vader asks as he changed his lightsabre blade to red
"It says that Flora" The Storm trooper says
"Blue?" Darth Vader asks
"Storm clouds" The Storm Trooper responds
"Yellow?" Darth Vader asks again
"Canary" The storm trooper replies
"Orange?" Darth Vader asks
"Orange. Orange, popsicle" The Storm trooper responds
"Who Named these? Doesn't matter, Prepare to DIE!" Darth Vader Exclaimed as he swung his lightsabre and hit the Storm trooper's helmet
The Lightsabre bounced off
"*gasps* huh? Wha-What?" The unlucky storm trooper utters
"Er, Safety is On" The storm Trooper reading the instruction manual said
"Safety? What's a safety on a LightSabre" Vader questions as he toggles the Lightsabre setting
Suddenly the lightsabre drops down and becomes a whip
"Whoa, *chuckles* I swear this never happens" Darth Vader said as his lightsabre turned into a whip
The storm troopers hesitantly joined the laugh
"It looks like you have it on whip" The storm trooper reading the manual said
"Er, Rake, pin wheel, tooth pick, sword that is shaped like a question mark, fork, spork, sword that only kills ghosts" the storm trooper read out as Darth Vader's lightsabre blade changed designs
"Pfft, Sword that only kills ghosts? That's stupid" Darth Vader said
Vader waves his lightsabre about
"Gimme that" Vader said as he snatched the instruction manual away from the storm trooper who was reading it
He reads the manual for a while before saying "Ah, Okay. Here we go" and ogles the lightsabre setting
His lightsabre turns into a thin white blade and he swings it across the storm trooper's chest
The blade shows no effect
"Now you have cancer" Darth Vader announced
"Wha-What?" The storm trooper stammered
"Yep, and now you die in sixteen months, depending on how you respond to treatments" Darth Vader said
"Hey don't worry buddy, we're all in this toether" The storm trooper who was reading the manual said as he hugged the other storm trooper
"Thanks. Well everyone, I've got some phone calls to make" Said the Storm Trooper before turning away and start walking away
"nah, This isn't gonna work for me, I need something with a little more power" darth vader said as he toggled his lightsabre setting once more
"Uh Oh" The storm trooper said as he stopped dead in his tracks
His new lightsabre blade turns into his old lightsabre blade
"here we go" Darth Vader said as he tried to hit the storm trooper but the adaptor was holding him back
"Die!" Darth Vader said as he repeatedly tried to hit the storm trooper
"There's a red slider on that, if you want to make it grow bigger" One of the storm troopers said
"Just be careful, that thing very sensi- SHIT!" The storm trooper exclaimed as Darth Vader toggled his light sabre setting and his blade grows so big it shoots out of the roof of the imperial complex
"Don't worry, just don't move" The storm trooper said in a worried tone
"What did you say?" Darth Vader asked as he turned and his light sabre cut through the rest of the Imperial Complex like cutting a cake