A mask is dangerous, it can help you in times of need; however it carries with it a dangerous drug. A need and a desire for a mask to be worn in order to conceal your true self from others in fear of being judged, it becomes a part of who you actually are, and you begin to feel as though you no longer possess what you once had. The mask we all hide behind isn't going to make our problems go away; they only hide them from everyone else. There are times when you need to show others your true self, times where you will need their help, but they can only help you if you let them see who you are. For me all of this is a scary thought, I don't like people knowing about my past, or even my present. I feel very uncomfortable when people try to pry into my personal life. I'm accustom to keeping myself in a bubble, away from everything and away from everyone's prying eyes. In a time like this I should easily open up, tell them everything I know, everything that has happened, but somehow doing that is too difficult. I would rather risk my life in order to protect them from the truth that follows me like a contaminated dark river thrashing onto the sides of the riverbed. Once that river has finished washing away the edge which holds all that is bad, then it is there where the treasure lies, the treasures of family and my true self, my true identity but more importantly it is there where I open up and let everything good pour out, and this once blackened river becomes crisp and clean.
A sleepless night, one I suspect, of many to come. Every waking moment from here on out will be lived in fear. Fear that clings onto every sound that hollow's in the night. Every creak the foot makes as it glides upon the hardwood floor. If I allow fear to run my life, then I really am not living my life, it is the fear that is. To allow such a thing to happen, I never would have let it. I was the one that everyone else feared, I was fear. Now the roles have been reversed. It is I who fears, I no longer possess the power of intimidation. I suppose it's not a bad thing, I would much rather be approachable than ignored out of fear. That's exactly what I tried to accomplish last year when I first arrived at school. I tried to reinvent myself. I tried to be the one that everyone liked, but it's much too difficult, I would much rather just be myself. Trying to be someone you're not is too difficult in my opinion. I would much rather live a life where I don't need to worry about what others say about me, I don't want their words to define who I am, good or bad. Too much praise and you become arrogant and selfish, too many harsh words and you become dependent on acceptance.
Kiba has already gotten up and vanished. The space next to me is now very empty and cold to the touch. I look up to the white ceiling. The stationary light that shines false sun light, in a blink this could all be gone. This calm life I'm living is nothing compared to the pain and terror that my friend faced as she called my name with her dying breath, begging for me to save her. An empty promise, an empty hope. The pain of guilt, the feeling of responsibility weighs down on my shoulders as a constant reminder.
"Hey, how 'ya feeling?" Kiba asks as he takes a sip of whatever is in his white mug.
"Tired." I respond flatly, "Where's Kakashi?"
"He went out. I think he went to talk to his police thing about what happened yesterday and to see if-"
"Kiba, no offense, but that's the last thing I want to talk about this morning. I'm just trying to pretend that yesterday was some scary nightmare. So can you just not talk about it?"
"Kanae this isn't a dream, it's not something that'll just go away" he says calmly as he approaches carefully.
"It did before, who's to say it won't happen again?" I sit down at the table starring at the mug Kiba places in front of me.
"Kanae, you and I both know that-"
"Kiba, that's enough. I told you I didn't want to talk about it, and the first thing you go and do is talk about it!" I say sternly.
"Kanae." He says hurt. "Naoto will be here in a while. Once he's here I guess I'll head out."
"Great." I say monotone.
"I just have one question for you Kanae, what do you push away anyone who could possibly care about you?" Kiba looks at me from across the table with eyes glazed in pain. His eyes burning a hole through mine, I don't answer, I just look down at the cup in between my hands. The doorbell sounds, Kiba leaves his spot silently to answer the door. It is easy to tell the atmosphere here is damp and raw with emotion. It silences Naoto as he enters the apartment. With only a simple question "What happened here?" Kiba didn't answer, and neither did I, he only left , with not even a slight turn of his head to check back, just like that he was gone. My eyes sting and my vision beings to blur as the white mug becomes a blurred mess.
"Kanae!" Naoto rushes over when he notices my tears, "Are you okay?"
"Fine." I reply with a heavy heart. Naoto embraces me with kindness, he lathers me in care. He's extremely gentle and considerate. He kisses my head as the tears fall silently.
"Do you want me to get you anything?" He asks sweetly.
"No, it's okay. Thanks." I kiss his cheek lightly, "I think I might just …" a heavy sigh escapes my lips, "go to bed. I didn't sleep well last night."
"Okay. I'll be out here if you need anything okay? Don't hesitate to call. I'm here for you, and I always will be no matter what."
"Thanks Naoto, I really appreciate all of this, I really do." I glide silently back to my room. I can feel Naoto's eyes following me in anxiety and fear of all things bad as I make my way. I need some time to myself, to think things through. When no one else is near, when I have no one else around me to bother me, I just need some me time, is that too much to ask? Don't get me wrong, I'm really grateful for Kakashi, Kiba, and Naoto; honestly I am, more than I could likely ever express. They are so caring and so understanding. The steps that they've taken this last year is incredible. My life likely wouldn't be as good as it is if it weren't for these guys, mostly Kiba. I've said this before, in my life, I tend to have more guy friends, and this is a perfect example actually. There are few girls in my life. Sakura, Ino, and of course Hinata, being the only ones really other than my sister, but the amount of guys in my life is so much more. There's Kiba of course, Naoto, Kakashi who is now like the older brother I never had, Naruto, Shikamaru, Choji, and I'd hate to admit it but Sasuke. The support every single person has given me is phenomenal and I feel as though I'm not worthy of it. Not in the bit am I worthy of all their kindness, generosity, and I'd hate to say it but hell even their love. Though not on the whole sexual level, more of a brotherly kind of love. These guys are awesome really.
I still can't seem to manage to get what Kiba said to me out of my head though. It pains me to admit it but I know why I do what I do. But I'm afraid that Kiba and everyone else won't understand or even accept my reasons. I don't want people, especially Kiba, to know my reasons. It's difficult for me to admit to other people, and I don't fully understand why myself. I just know that for some reason that it's hard to allow people to get close to me, to allow people into my life. It's just hard for me to trust others. I suppose that it has to do with my past, with my family. My family has never really been there when I needed them; they stood to one side during my times of trouble and pain. That is the loyalty that my life lacked. It was my friends that left me when I was being bullied, that was the trust that left me. I never trusted anyone else fully since then. It made me lose faith in men, not just because my friends left when I needed them, but the infidelity that I saw both in my life and on the television. That is when I stopped trusting. All of these together are the loss of faith I have in humanity. I want someone by my side that will be with my through the hard times, who won't run away with the next girl that passes them by. I just need some kind of consistency in my life. I want to be able to rely on that person and hope that they would feel that same way about me. Want me to be faithful and would trust me with all their secrets. I just haven't met anyone like that yet, or maybe I have and I'm the one that just hasn't realized it yet. Realized the reality of it all. Reality is hard to escape though; there is always a constant reminder that stays near.
I leave my silent room behind and return back to the living room where Naoto is sitting watching the images from the television. The sound from the television completely shut off, it's just the images that prance around the screen.
"Naoto" I say quietly.
"Yeah?" he quickly turns around "Do you need anything Kanae? Want me to get you something or-"
"Can I join you?"
"Of course you can Kanae!" I sit down next to him, grabbing the remote and turning the sound on.
"Why was the sound off?" I ask him.
"I was afraid something bad was going to happen so I kept it on mute just in case." He smiles embarrassed.
"That's cute." I smile "Really, that's kinda geeky cute." He brings his hand around my shoulder and gently kisses my cheek. I turn to face him, our lips meet, and he kisses me gently. We part only for a moment before our lips find each other's again. The soft embrace as he places his large hands on my side. Carefully lowering me down to the couch as things heat up a little more, the pace fastens. Then, an abrupt opening of the door, we are brought back to reality. Kiba glares at us from the doorway, with Akamaru by his side.
"You're stupid mutt ran away." He tells Naoto coldly.
"You're kidding me?"
"You seriously think I would come all this way if he didn't?"
"Where'd he go?"
"How the hell am I supposed to know?" Kiba snaps.
"I better go find him; can you stay here with Kanae?" He asks Kiba as he gets up from the couch.
"Sure."
"Can I take Akamaru with me? He'd be more apt to find that silly dog before I could."
"Go ahead, but if you lose Akamaru be aware that I will kill you."
"Yeah, yeah, I get it, you love the dog."
"The 'dog' has a name, and if you want this 'dog' to find your stupid mutt you better show him some respect."
"My dog isn't stupid, and he's not a mutt. He just hates listening to you. I guess you're not as good of an alpha as you thought."
"Are you going to keep droning on and on, or will you leave already and find your dog?"
"Yeah, yeah I'm going." He waves to me from the door as he leaves with the giant white fluff ball.
"What's with you? Why are you in such a foul mood?" I ask Kiba as I head over to the kitchen to put away some clean dishes.
"Nothing." He growls.
"Oh, there's something. Don't even think for once that you can fool me."
"Shut up will you woman?"
"Excuse me?!" I scoff, "What the hell Kiba! Just because you're in a bad mood doesn't mean you can take it out on me."
"You're really something you know that Kanae. How far have you gone with Naoto, huh?"
"What's with this all of a sudden? Besides it doesn't concern you how far I may or may not have gone with Naoto." I slam the cupboard door in anger. What's gotten into him?
"So you've had sex with him, is that what you're tell me? What was I not good enough or something?!" He asks, his voice raised and filled with anger. This may be the first time I've seen him this mad. It's scary actually.
"You were perfectly fine Kiba! You know my view on this stuff! How can you even accuse me of that? Just because I'm with someone else doesn't mean I go changing my morals! What the hell is wrong with you?"
"What's wrong with me?! Seriously you're asking me that?!" His voice angry, filled with rage and disbelief. "I'm fed up, okay? I'm fed up with everything! I don't even know what to think about you anymore. How to act around you anymore. It would be best if we went back to the way we were at the beginning, the very beginning." He says with his voice calmed.
"When we hated each other?" I ask.
"Yeah, something like that."
"Tolerate then?"
"Yeah." The room quiets down and all that can be heard is the noise from the television. "This'll likely be the last time I come over. It's likely best that we don't see each other anymore. Once either Kakashi or Naoto comes back then I'll leave, for good."
"Okay." Only moments pass and we hear the doorknob move, Kakashi enters the apartment. Kiba walks to the door, with one last remorseful glance in my direction. The door shuts and that's the end of it. Kakashi looks to me.
"You alright?" he asks.
"Fine." I walk to my room. It seems to be a safe haven for me now. But how safe is it actually? A room, a house, they are only small barriers, barriers that could be easily broken. I don't know why I feel safe here, it's silly really. If they so desired too, they could get in. It sometimes boggles me as to why humans feel safe in a house during troubling times. There has always been that state of warmth and safety surrounding it. Just think for a moment. During natural disasters often times the house is first to be damaged, washed away, or even blown away. Why do we have such an attachment to a house? Is it really all that we put it up to be? I'm not saying that houses are a bad thing, I for one love the fact that the elements can't get inside and any gross rodents are kept outside. My question is why do we feel safe in a place that is filled with dangers daily? Fires can easily break out; there are knives, sharp corners, glass, extremely hot elements and an oven that reaches extreme temperatures. Those are only a few of many examples. There is a great deal of things in our homes that we just slide off as normal. But when you look at it, all of these utensils that we use in our day to day life often are what cause our death. But hey, we like that kind of stuff don't we?! Humans that is, they love to replace natural beauty with fake beauty, paving over all that is good, just to imitate what they destroyed. I suppose that it's in our nature now, we learn through both example and experience. Our history has wired us to destroy without the thought of consequences.
"Kanae, you need anything?" Kakashi asks though the door.
"No."
"You sure? It's supper time, want any food at all?" it's already supper time?
"No, I can get it myself."
"It's ready now; you either eat now or not at all."
"I'll be out in a minute."
"That's more like it." I can hear him chuckle through the door. Evil little man. I get up and head to the kitchen.
"Take out? Really? You got take out for supper? Why not just cook?" I ask taking some one the food and placing it on my plain white plate.
"Cooking takes a lot of energy, and after today I didn't feel like working in a stupid kitchen."
"Or yesterday, or the day before that, or the day before that." I say as I take a bite of the food.
"Okay, okay I get it. Balanced meals and all that stuff. Tomorrow."
"You said that yesterday."
"I liked it better when you were just a student."
"Hey, you chose me to live here, remember? You have to deal with the little sister attitude."
"Just eat your broccoli."
"You first." I joke while taking another mouthful.
"You're enjoying this aren't you?" he asks.
"Thoroughly."
"Just eat."
"Fine, fine Mr. Grumpy pants." I down the food; put the dishes in the dishwasher and began to walk back to my room.
"Now what are 'ya gonna do? You can't stay in your room forever you know."
"I'm doing homework, as a teacher you should be happy I'm doing this, and encouraging it. Oh, and gonna, isn't a word, and here I thought you were smart!"
I close the door behind me. Turn on the lights. I look around at my room. I've managed to keep it clean. Not spotless mind you, but clean. Is this really the way to live? I stay isolated in my room, in the apartment. It's not much of a life is it? I want to go out, I want to pretend like all of this was some bad dream, but it's not, it's reality. I'm well aware of that, but even so, it doesn't change the fact that I can't stay caged forever. I need to leave, I need to socialize, but apparently it's not safe for that. But it's been 'safe enough' for the past three years. So how is this any different? It shouldn't be but it is. I have to listen, because it's not just Kakashi telling me, but the police. It's not like they can stop them though, these people are sneaky, they are calculating. I guess you could say that I'm tired. Tired of everything. I'm tired of being misunderstood, and having no one to talk to about it. I have Naoto sure, but we're not at the point that I can spill my heart out and sob like a baby because I feel wronged. Kiba I could do that with, maybe. But it's not an option now, he hate me now. I definitely can't talk to my family or Kakashi, and Hinata, Ino, and Sakura are out of the county and there's no way to contact them. So I really have no one. In this big scary world there's not one person to talk to. Besides, I don't want to burden them with my troubles. I just have to deal with it, I did it before, I can do it again…I think.
I look to the clock, 11:00 p.m., I should go to bed. I turn the light off and get changed into some comfy PJ's. It's been rather warm lately, so I wear lighter P.J's. I hear a tap on my window, my heart races, please no. Another tap. This apartment is close to the very top of the building, how…?
"Open it up Kanae." Dammit, I know that voice. Kiba. Idiot! He freaking scared me to death! Wait, how the hell did he get all the way up here? "Kanae!" I open the blind, and open the window, take off the screen so he can get in. Trust me, I normally wouldn't have let him in, but for one it's really high and I don't want him to fall, it is night time and did I mention it's dangerous? I can't be accountable for a famous singer's death who also happens to be my ex-boyfriend/ friend; that would look very bad indeed. " 'Bout bloody time!" Kiba jumps into my room quietly.
"What are you doing here Kiba?!" I ask annoyed, I was about to go to sleep for god's sake!
"Shh, just don't talk."
"Excuse me? I have every right to talk, you're in my room, and I can ask questions if I want!" I put the screen back in its place, Kiba standing behind me grumbling something. I close and lock the window, putting the blind back down.
"You reek of alcohol, have you been drinking?"
"What's it to you? It's none of your business."
"You know what I think about alcohol Kiba, and you especially know what I think about you using it in bad ways."
"So what, I'm a little drunk, no biggie." He shrugs, rummaging through the things on my desk. "Man, your room is clean."
"Kiba, that's enough, just get out!" I say angrily. I can't deal with these stupid antics of his any longer.
"You know what," he says, his voice, his demeanor, his body language, everything about him changing "no. I'm not going to leave. What the hell is your problem?" he pins me to the wall. "Normal girls are supposed to even act sad when they break up. They should at least care, but you. Oh no, you didn't, you didn't even care!"
"I did care!"
"No you didn't!" he snaps angrily. "Why the hell didn't you do anything? I toyed with all those girls and you did shit! You were supposed to react!"
"You did all of that to torture me?! You ass! Look, I did care, I cared a lot. I'm just good at hiding my feelings from people. And excuse me I did interrupt, the day you were lip locked with that blonde you had scolded just the day before, yeah, remember her? I cared Kiba, you just didn't see it."
"I saw it." His voice lowered, "I always have. With you, I could always see when you were sad, when you were mad, every emotion you felt. The company…they made me."
"Kiba, no one can make you do anything if you don't want to." He lowered his arms, but they still remained on the wall, still blocking me.
"You don't get it. They wanted me to go back to the 'bad boy'; they wanted me to be the player of the group. To make it seem like I wasn't able to be 'tamed' the way they put it. But I didn't see it as being tamed. I saw it as losing someone important in such a bad way." There was a few seconds of silence before he added "but that still doesn't change the fact that you just moved on so easily! I only went out with Fuji to make you jealous. I thought for some stupid reason that you would be more jealous of a girl if she was in a long term relationship thingy. But even when I went out with that annoying bitch and talked to you about my so called 'problems', you just happily helped me. You were super supportive, even when I called you a 'friend' when you asked what I thought of you. Kanae, you were so much more than a friend, you always were. But you moved on so easily! It freaking killed me Kanae. You went to my cousin for god's sake! My COUSIN! What did that idiot have that I didn't?" he snorts in annoyance. "Did you have any idea about how good my families' sniffer is? We have exceptional noses, and we can smell the subtlest of changes in the human body. From fear, sadness, stress, arousal…" he eyes me like he had the day he first forced his way into my room back at school. "My cousin can too. And unlike me, he might try to take advantage of it. Like he did today, and you were going to let him had I not come in."
"Kiba, I-"
"No, it's okay. I mean it's not like I ever mattered to you." He moves away from me. Turning around and looking through the window. I had to bite my lip from saying that he was wrong. From saying that he was likely the one person in my life that mattered the most to me, that he was the one I was most afraid to loose. I can't say that now, not only will he not remember it, but if he does it would cause so many problems. Problems that don't won't exist if I don't say a word.
"You should take a shower, and brush your teeth. If Kakashi comes in here and smells alcohol, he'll think that I've been drinking underage and I'll lose the few freedoms I have left." I grumble.
"Yeah, yeah I get it, it's all about you!" actually I want him to be sober and feel cleaner, I don't care about my freedoms. Honestly I don't really have any. I just want Kiba to be safe. "You likely ought to come with me. If I go there and Kakashi knocks on the door and hears me answer, I don't think that he'll be very happy about that."
"You mean you need a cover?" For a drunken guy he has a point though.
"Yeah, and clothes, I'll need clothes."
"I'll see if there are any clean clothes of Kakashi's in the clean basket. Stay put and be quite." I leave the room, going to the laundry basket. Trying to be as quite as I can, but still seem natural because I know Kakashi is still up. That's the downside of living with a young-ish person.
"Where are you headed to?" Kakashi asks, his eyes staying glued onto the television.
"I'm going to get my laundry, then go for a shower. Is that okay with his highness?" I can't be different or he'll figure out that I'm up to something.
"Okay, just don't stay up too late tonight."
"You mean like you do?"
"Don't you have something to do?"
"Ah, the smell of victory, and alcohol?" is he drinking?
"I know what you're thinking; yes I'm having a beer. I'm an adult you know."
"Still, you're my stuffy history teacher. Who replaced my beloved teacher with this scruffy man-child?"
"Man-child?" He asks, turning around.
"Yes, man-child. Don't deny it. You're a man-child." He chuckles to himself. He turns back around and continues to watch his program.
"Hurry up and take your stupid shower." I go to the laundry room and take my things, along with some of Kakashi's things for Kiba. I leave without a word of question from Kakashi and return to my room.
"That took a while."
"Shut up and be thankful. C'mon lets go." I open the door and look around to see if the coast is clear. When I determine that it is, we both quickly rush to the bathroom. Only as I go in do I realize I should likely take a shower myself. But there is no way in hell I'm having a shower with this boy in here at the same time! No, he'll have his shower, I'll help him sneak back into my room and then go back to the bathroom to have my shower. This night would have been so much easier had he not come. Why did it have to be tonight of all nights?
"Here are the clothes. There's your towel. I'll be facing the door the whole time. Be as fast as you can, got it?"
"Yes ma'am." I turn around and lock the door. I hear him take off his clothes as he steps into the shower. This is going to be very awkward, I can feel it. About ten minutes pass with not a single word, I hear him turn the water off. Open the shower door and gather the things around him. "You can turn around now." He says. So I do, and the boy is shirtless. Really?
"Put a shirt on will you?"
"In this heat? Yeah right, you want me to die of heat? Look at you, little miss short shorts and tank top."
"Hey, my summer PJ's are none of your business."
"They are now." I huff in annoyance.
"Are you ready to go?"
"I still need to brush my teeth, you told me to, remember?"
"Yeah, yeah just hurry it up."
"Gotta extra tooth brush?"
"No, use your finger." He huffs and grabs the toothpaste, applying it to his finger and 'brushes' his teeth.
"Mouthwash and floss?" he asks. I point to the mouthwash and hand him the floss. "Thanks." I nod. "Aren't you going to brush your teeth? Or floss?"
"I'm having a shower, after your back in my rooms safely and hiding in the closet until I'm back. So I'll do all of that hygiene stuff when you're not here."
"Why, you self-conscious about it or something. There's the shower, it's not like I'll look."
"Yes you will. I know you better."
"Hey, you didn't sneak a peek, so I'll return the favour."
"I'm not having a shower with you in here Kiba. It's not happening."
"Won't Kakashi wonder why the water was running, you leave the room only to go back and put the water back on for another I don't know thirty minutes? A little suspicious don't you think?" He has a point, a damn good annoying as hell point. And I know Kakashi will say something, because he's just that kind of guy. I hate it when he's right.
"You have a good point. But if you so much as glance near my direction I will hurt you and you'd wish you never looked."
"I never regret anything I do around you." He smirks.
"I mean it Kiba. I'm very serious. If you look-"
"I know Kanae. Just hurry up and strip and take your damn shower." I glare at his back, grab a towel as I undress. Making sure that I'm covered at all times. As soon as I'm undressed, I leap into the shower, towel still wrapped around me until the door to the shower is closed. The lucky thing about this place is that the shower doors are slightly opaque from the neck down. Only an outline of my body is shown, but even so, I don't want Kiba to turn around and look. That's just a huge no-no. I keep my eye on Kiba, making sure that he isn't looking, or even trying to for that matter. I quickly wash my hair and my body, rise it all off and grab my towel on my way out of the shower. I wrap my towel around me as I get changed back into my PJ's, being sure to make sure my body is covered at all times of course, which is actually much more difficult than it sounds.
"Done now?" Kiba asks turning around.
"Did I say you could turn around? How would you know if I was done or not, huh? You wouldn't, you're damn lucky I was changed when you turned around." I scold him.
"Yeah, yeah. Tell it to someone who cares. I'm a guy, you should know by now that we never listen." I roll my eyes and open the door, checking to see if the coast is clear.
"Let's just go." We scurry to my room and as soon as he's in I close it shut. "Okay, now that you're more sober, go home."
"Can't."
"And why the hell not?"
" 'Cause it's super late. I'm an idol, so if anything happened to me you would be held accountable as I told the boys that I was coming over, well that was after I ranted to them while drinking. So you really don't want to be held accountable for the precious idol's life slash reputation, now would you?"
"Of all the people I had to piss off it had to be you, didn't it?!"
"Lucky old you." Kiba sits lightly on my bed, smiling cockily.
"I don't think so, you get the floor."
"Real funny. No way I'm sleeping on the floor after all I've done for you."
"Kiba I've got one word for you; Kakashi."
"I've got the floor."
"Good boy."
"Kanae." He says gently.
"Yeah, what is it Kiba?"
"You're a very strong woman, you know that?" his words made me pause for a second, my words were not able to form. "I know that people call you scary, but you have reason to be. You've been through so much. You are an extremely amazing woman. You don't let anyone faze you; you never let your opinions be swayed by people who want to take advantage of you. You speak your mind and you don't let people put you down. That's what first attracted me to you, you know? When we first met, you just fired right back at me each time I tried to intimidate you, and you always won. I honestly believe that you're a great person Kanae, a great woman, and any guy would be lucky to have you. I'm just upset that it can't be me."
"And why can't it?" I whisper.
"Because we've already fallen too far apart, what's worse is I was the one that let it happen."
"I encouraged it though." I say, sitting down next to him.
"We both did." I look to him as silence falls upon us.
As dawn approaches my eyes wake due to a small rustle from outside the door. No doubt Kakashi is up for his daily exercise regime which is actually really intense. Here I thought he was supposed to be a stuffy old history teacher that does nothing but spend his time learning about new things for the fun of it. I feel Kiba's arm wrap around my side, holding me close to his body. I can't really remember when we feel asleep or if I even made Kiba sit on the floor. I just remember talking with him for a very long time and after that everything is just a bit of a blur. Kiba nuzzles his face in the crook of my neck, breathing evenly as he sleeps comfortably. I didn't have the heart to move him away from me. He seemed all too comfortable and extremely happy. So I allowed myself to doze back off to sleep.
I wake up to pounding on the door, Kakashi yelling at me to get up. He opens my door, and I realize that Kiba was still in my room, wearing no shirt and his PJ bottoms, with his arms around my waist, in my room when he wasn't even in the apartment earlier in the past day. Yup, this looks very bad indeed.
"Kanae!" Kakashi says angrily.
"Kakashi, I can explain."
So, um, yeah, sorry about the not as constant updates. I've been super busy with stupid school work so it's extremely difficult for me to do anything outside of studying and doing homework. So basically I've had no time to do any writing and that's been annoying me a lot actually. I don't know how many of you actually read this part, but I want to thank you all. 'Cause it's all because of the people who read this and review, and even favorite or alert it which really encourages me to continue writing because you guys are interested in it and you are constantly helping me with self-confidence in my writing which has really dwindled in the past few months.