Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight. I do own a menagerie of geriatric animals and a husband who's obsessed with mowing the lawn in the patterns found on baseball fields.
I wrote a one shot for the Age of Edward Contest. I chose 1960s Edward at Woodstock, and it's called "Save Your Love." Check it out (and review, because you know I'm a whore like that). Obviously, the link is in my profile, under My Stories.
THANK YOU to my betas, zetas, omegas and any other letter of the Greek alphabet you want to throw in (In alphabetical order, 'cause you know the girls are anal bitches):
Isabella303, Idea Bouncer Extraordinaire and Yellow Highlighter Dominatrix – without her, the girls would have never argued for joint shower privileges.
KnittingVamp7, Comma Container and Capitalization Crusader
*****
Chapter 14: Provoking the Precious
"God, Bella, you're heavy," Edward groaned when I hopped on his back. Would the man never learn to quit making comments about my weight?
After the Attack of Emo Edward in the woods, I wasn't cutting him any slack. He seemed to be feeling better after our lewd and lascivious act in the clearing. Who knew that doing something that was probably a felony in Kansas would be a fix for his emo episodes? I was going to take advantage of his better mood and catch myself a ride. The man was wearing me out.
"Tough titties, Edward," I retorted, hitching myself a little higher against his back. I also may have allegedly tightened my forearm just a bit too much around his neck. Allegedly on purpose. He coughed and I let go. "You're the one who wanted to take a hike today. Then you decided to have your wicked way with me in the woods. Can you blame me for being simply too exhausted to walk the rest of the way to the car?" I leaned my head over his shoulder and caught him smirking again. He just loved to push my buttons.
But… he pushes our button so well, Bella!
He really did, but I've agreed with them enough lately. They're getting a little cocky.
…
Really? Nothing, girls? I left the door wide open there. Huh. Maybe they're quieting down a little, or at least maturing…
"Come on, it's only fifty feet to the car. You can make it," he said, pretending like he was about to drop me. I held on tightly, like some type of arachnid – slash – primate.
"Nope. I don't think I can." I leaned forward again to whisper in his ear. "My legs are a little shaky… I have no idea why."
"Forgot already, did you? You know, if I didn't have to carry you to the car, we might have had time for me to remind you…" he trailed off, sighing. I reached back and smacked him on his perfect behind. Well, I tried to anyway. I think I might have hit his hip.
"Giddyup, Buttercup," I said. "You're not getting off that easily."
"Buttercup?" he laughed. "Can't I have a more manly horse name? I think I'm insulted."
"Buttercup is a very distinguished name, I'll have you know. Remember Princess Buttercup in The Princess Bride?" I asked, trying not to laugh.
"Princess Buttercup," he said flatly. "Thanks."
"What about Buttercup the horse in Half Baked?" I laughed out loud this time.
"Oh, thank you, Bella. You named me after the farting diabetic horse in a stoner movie!"
"'Hey girl, ya hungry?'" I laughed close to his ear.
"That's it," he growled, running the last few yards to the car. Guess I'm not that heavy after all. I slid down his back and stepped back quickly as he whipped around. He looked a little pissed… and a whole lot sexy. I shrugged the heavy backpack off my shoulders and let it drop to the pavement.
"What, Edward? I was just asking!" Oh, I was so tongue-in-cheek.
Hopefully it will be Edward's tongue!
Of course, I completely agreed.
He advanced on me and I played along, quickly realizing he was herding me up against the car. I went willingly.
"Really, Edward, there are Clif Bars in the backpack…" Teasing Edward always got me results.
"You seem to be operating under the misapprehension that I am female. 'Princess Buttercup'. 'Hey girl, ya hungry'?" he mocked, pressing me against the car with his body. I tried to raise my hands to his face in order to calm him down, but he grabbed both my wrists and pinned them to my sides.
"Leave them there." His voice was rough and I sucked in a breath, biting my lip, feeling heat sweep throughout my whole body. His hands moved, one rounding my waist and settling at the small of my back, the other traveling up my torso to encircle my neck. His mouth covered mine, all teeth and tongue and demanding lips.
Note to self: Call Edward girly names more often.
His fingers were warm and firm against my neck. I trusted him completely with one of the most vulnerable parts of my body. He was pressed against me from chest to thigh as he thrust his tongue in my mouth, his hand cupping my throat, my pulse fluttering against his hand. He owned me completely in that moment. My hands hung at my sides, clenched into fists as we kissed. My fingers itched with the need to touch him and my knees trembled.
"Mommy, what is that man doing to the lady?" I heard, the sound punctuated by the slamming of a car door and laughter. We'd been so wrapped up in each other that we'd failed to notice a car pulling into the parking lot. Edward yanked his mouth from mine and put a few inches between us, his breathing labored. His eyes were the color of the pine forest at dusk and filled with unsatisfied lust.
"Tonight, Bella," he said roughly. "After tonight, you'll never associate me with anything female, ever again." It was a promise that only stoked the fire burning in my gut.
"'Kay," I sighed, licking my lips as he patted his pockets, looking for his keys – the keys that were currently in one of the zippered pockets of the backpack. I suppressed a smile and bent over, quietly removing the keys and walking to the driver's side. Once I was there, I hit the button to unlock the car and quickly slid into the driver's seat. I had the seat adjusted for my size before he realized what I'd done. He tapped on the window, jerking his thumb over his shoulder.
Oh, he wants me to get out? Fat chance.
I cracked the window. "Get the backpack and get in, will you?" I smiled sweetly as he scowled at me. I waved my fingers at him and he gave up, turning on his heel and stalking to the passenger side. He plopped down in the seat and slammed the door. "Edward! Be careful! You have to be gentle with this fine piece of Swedish machinery," I said teasingly.
"Be gentle is right, Bella! I never let anyone drive my car," he muttered, shaking his head.
"Don't worry, Edward, I won't hurt your precious baby."
You'd better not, or he won't let us have OUR Precious!
I flipped the girls the mental bird.
"Hey, will you get my iPod? It's in the pack somewhere." He rummaged around and found my Nano, and I attached it to the auxiliary cable. He still looked put-upon, and he sighed dramatically. I shook my head and started the car, smiling at the smooth purr of the engine. Those Cullens really had rubbed off on me…
One of them has rubbed ON you… and you liked it.
We're back to immature teenage boy again.
I thumbed through my music library, looking for the perfect driving song. Yes! I pressed 'Play,' cranked up the volume, and threw it into reverse as the car filled with the sound of funky bass guitar.
Hey man, you know I'm really okay…
"Bella, you've gotta be kidding me…" he groaned. I grinned at him and began to sing along as I peeled out of the parking lot.
"The gun in my hand will tell you the same
But when I'm in my car, don't give me no crap
Cause the slightest thing and I just might snap
"When I go driving I stay in my lane
Getting cut off, it makes me insane
Reach in the glovebox, check inside
Gonna wreck this fucker's ride…
"I love this song!" I yelled over the music.
"I think you should slow down a bit," he said uneasily. We were on the short length of highway between his parents' house and the nature reserve, so I gunned it, just to mess with him. "Bella! You're going ninety-five!"
"So? I've seen you do ninety-five with me in the car," I said as I weaved through traffic. "Which exit is yours?" Oh, I was enjoying this so much. Speed Racer was getting a taste of his own medicine.
"The exit after next," he said tensely. "Bella, please slow down, you're not used to driving this car-"
"Shush, Edward. We're almost there. When we get to your parents' house, you can inspect your precious car," I said patronizingly, glancing at him. When I turned my head back to the road, it was just in time to be cut off by an enormous Jeep. "Shit!" I stomped on the brake and came within inches of rear-ending that sucker. "Sonofabitch!"
Something's odd… feel like I'm God
Stupid, dumb shit, Goddamn motherfucker!
'Motherfucker' was right!
"Fuck, Bella! Be careful!" he roared. I chanced a glimpse over at him. Edward was using the "oh shit" handle!
Girls, we have arrived! We scared the shit out of Edward with our driving!
Oh, fuck. Now I was talking to them? Straitjacket, please…
I decided to focus my attention on the asshole in the Jeep.
"I'm following that jerk," I growled. "Do you have any of those cards that Alice has?"
"No! Bella, we're going back to my parents' place. No following," he told me. "Please."
"Okay," I sighed, clenching the steering wheel so hard my knuckles were white. I might not get to follow this 'tard for long, but I was gonna ride his ass while I could. That would show him.
"You might want to start merging to the right, because our exit is next," Edward said. I grudgingly followed his instructions and took the exit. Fortunately for me, the Jeep was going the same way. In fact, the Jeep was going to exactly the same place we were. I parked the car behind the offensive vehicle in Edward's parents' driveway. Who should step out of the driver's seat? Meat Sweats himself.
"Edward, why didn't you recognize your own brother's car?" I asked through clenched teeth.
"I've never seen it before! It must be new."
"It's official, all three of you drive like maniacs!"
"Then welcome to the family, Love! You're worse than the rest of us put together!"
I gasped in affront. There was no way I was worse than the three of them. I undid my seat belt and got out of the car, using all my strength to slam the door.
"Where the hell did you learn how to drive, Meat Sweats?" I yelled, stalking towards him.
"That was you?" he asked. "What the fuck, Edward? You're letting her drive now? Are you insane?"
"She stole my keys, Emmett!" Edward protested. I treated them both to the double bird.
Oh, he so isn't getting any tonight.
But, Bella! Don't punish us! Punish Edward! We'll show you how! Remember that flogger we were talking about?
STFU, girls. I mean it.
"I can't believe Edward let you drive his car," Emmett mused, turning towards Edward. "In my country," he said in an exaggerated accent, "we say, 'To let woman drive car, is like to let monkey fly plane. Very dangerous, yes?'" My mouth dropped open. I was not prepared for him to quote Borat.
"I can't believe the state issued you a license, driving like that," I yelled. Edward joined me on the lawn, gripping my elbow gently. "Edward, you knock him down, I'll give him The People's Elbow!"
"Oooh, Edward, she's feisty! I bet she's a firecracker in the sack!" Emmett chortled. Edward just smirked and shrugged. I kicked him in the ankle, but he wasn't fazed.
"You are so banned from the restaurant. No more picanha for you!" I said, poking my index finger into Emmett's chest. Edward grabbed me and pulled me back into his chest, effectively pinning my arms to my sides. He was trying not to laugh. Traitor.
"Ignore him," he whispered in my ear. "The teasing means he likes you."
"Wait! No, you can't do that, Bella! I need that meat!" Emmett pleaded.
"No more comments like that," I said, "especially in front of your parents, Meat Sweats!"
He held up his hands. "Anything for the picanha," he said, looking relieved.
"Where's Rose?" Edward asked.
"She'll be here in a bit. She had to work late. She's trying to get some new kid she's representing signed by the Mariners." He looked at me. "She's a sports agent," he said.
"Oh, like Jerry Maguire?" I asked, smirking.
"Don't mention that movie in front of her if you want to live," Edward warned with a laugh.
"And, whatever you do, don't say 'Show me the money,'" Emmett added, looking absolutely serious.
"Why? What happens?" I asked.
"You don't want to know," Emmett said. I looked to Edward, who just nodded his head in solemn agreement.
"Come on, Bella, let's get your bag out of the car and we'll go change." Edward took my hand and led me back to the car.
"Oooh, looky at the lovey doveys," Emmett taunted. Edward flipped him off without looking back, squeezing my hand at the same time. I shot him a sideways glance and caught him looking at me, a smile curving one side of his mouth. My panties were ready to make like a 1929 stockbroker and fly right off of me.
We grabbed our bags out of the trunk and made our way into the house. We just had one change of clothes for dinner, since we weren't staying overnight, thank God. I was definitely not ready for an overnighter with the parents.
"Bella! It's so lovely to meet you in person!" Esme said, hurrying towards us. Oh, God, I hope she doesn't want to hug me! I probably smell like sweat and the sex I just had with her son! She swept up to me, arms wide, and I had no choice but to walk into the lion's den. I hugged her awkwardly, hoping against all hope that maybe she'd forgotten what sex smelled like. She did have grown children, after all. As I stepped back and took a second look at her, however, I had little doubt that unless her husband was an idiot or gay, she was more than likely still, er, "popping the lid on the soda can," as the girls would say.
"It's so nice to meet you, too, Esme," I said. I could feel my cheeks blazing, and it was my own fault. The girls were rubbing off on me. My mind was in the gutter and there was probably no hope of digging it out.
Just give in, Bella. We'll all be a lot happier.
I fought back a sigh. Esme turned to Edward and enveloped him in a tight hug.
"Edward, you don't come home enough," she said, holding him back at arms' length and giving him a good once-over. "You look exceptionally well." I had to remind myself that he was adopted, because I could have sworn he'd inherited his smirk from Esme. It was plastered on her face, and she looked back and forth between the two of us.
Edward grinned at her, winking. I wanted to fall into a hole and die.
"I'm a busy guy, now, Mom, what can I say?"
"I guess I can forgive you. Just this once," she said. "Why don't you two go and change for dinner, and we can chat then? I've got a few things left to get ready, so if you'll excuse me?"
"See you in a bit, Mom," Edward said. I waved, still unable to find my tongue. He led me up two flights of stairs, smirking at me the whole way. "This was my room," he said, opening a door at the end of the hall. "The bathroom is just through there. I'll be in the guest bathroom across the hall."
Separate showers? Don't you want to help the environment and conserve water? Tell Edward he needs to be more environmentally friendly!
I couldn't agree more, girls, but I'm not tempting fate twice in one day. Remember the woods?
I swear I heard them sigh in contentment.
Wait a minute! Since when do you care about the environment? Shit! I'm talking to them again.
Of course we care about the environment, Bella! The wasting of finite resources is everyone's business. We are helping the environment and the Precious!
I had no words.
"Bella? Where did you go?" Oh, shit. I really need to stop having these internal conversations. He's going to think I'm batshit crazy. Think fast!
"I, ah… I went to the woods." Oh, nice one. Idiot.
"Oh, you did?" Grabbing my wrist, he yanked me into the room and kicked the door shut behind him. "I've been thinking about that, too," he said with a wicked grin. He stepped closer to me and set his hands on my hips, turning the tractor beam on full force. I shut my eyes in the interest of self-preservation.
"Edward, I need to take a shower. Your mother is waiting downstairs. Not a good idea."
"We can always shower together… if I remember correctly, you're quite fond of that," he said, his mouth close to my ear. He was definitely invading my personal bubble. Too bad it didn't bother me in the least. We could form our own joint personal bubble and I'd be happy. Bubble Bella and her Bubble Boy.
Must. Resist.
No, Bella! Think about the environment…
"I am a fan…" I trailed off as he set his lips to my neck and one hand snaked around to my ass. What was I talking about? He dug his fingers in and pulled me against him, trailing his lips up to my mouth. I braced my hands against his chest, trying to keep some distance between us.
"I thought so," he said against my lips. His teasing was enough to break the hold of the tractor beam. I tried to respond, but his mouth was on mine and all that came out was some kind of muffled gibberish.
"What was that?" He asked, barely pulling back enough to speak. I tried to talk again, but he swooped back in, muffling my response once more.
"Mmrrmmph." Dear Lord, what is this man trying to do to me?
"I couldn't hear you," he whispered against my mouth, this time not even giving me the chance to try and speak before he closed his lips over mine. I could feel his smirk as our mouths connected. His hands traveled up underneath my t-shirt, pushing up the fabric as they went. The cool air brought me back to reality and I turned my head to the side, determined not to let him win yet again. His lips landed near my ear and he took my earlobe into his mouth, the gentle suction causing my back to arch. He wrapped his arms even more tightly around me, hugging me so hard my feet left the floor.
The next thing I knew, we'd crossed the room and he was pushing me back onto his bed. He reached behind his back with one hand and stripped the shirt off over his head before setting one knee on the mattress to follow me. My brain started functioning again just in time and I backed away quickly, sitting up against the headboard.
Even though I was determined to resist, his persistence was flattering. It was nice to know he wanted me that badly. Lord knows I wanted him in return. I just couldn't let him have his way all the time. I needed to develop a little bit of resistance to the 'sexy-time tractor beam,' or I'd never stand a chance against him.
"Edward! Your family is downstairs. We have plenty of time for this later," I said as he crawled up over the bed towards me, not stopping until he'd trapped me against the headboard.
"I can make it quick," he chuckled, once again nibbling at my ear. I was ashamed that he knew all my major weaknesses so well.
"Oh, well I'm sold, then!" I quipped. He chose that moment to begin rubbing his thumbs over my nipples, nearly sending everything but thoughts of the girls' Precious flying out of my brain. Nearly everything. I knew his weaknesses too, and I needed to use them if I was going to come out on top of this little skirmish.
Bella, you said 'come'!
Goddamn hussies. You're weak! WEAK!
I really had to quit talking to them.
I moaned for his benefit and pushed on his shoulders, indicating he should lie back on the bed.
I'm about to scramble your brain, Dr. Cullen. Please lie back for a thorough examination.
He flopped back against the pillows, a self-satisfied smirk on his face. I straddled his legs and gave him a quick kiss on the lips, before working my way down to his collarbone. I raked my nails down his chest and he inhaled sharply. I smiled against his skin as I traced a line with my tongue from one side to the other.
"Bella," he whispered, his hands tangling in my hair. I kissed across his pecs as my hands played around the waistband of his shorts. I almost felt bad.
Almost. Then I thought of all the times he'd used that damn tractor beam on me. I unfastened his shorts and unceremoniously shoved my hand into his boxers, gripping his length. He groaned softly and I couldn't resist stroking him. I used a firm grip as I pleasured him; his hands slid from my hair to clutch at the comforter. I couldn't resist reveling in the fact that it was all for me.
The ragged sounds he made were almost enough for me to have mercy on him, but I was feeling evil. I was also feeling selfish. All I could think about was what he would do to me later tonight, when there was no possibility of interruption. It was that thought I kept in my mind as I steeled my resolve.
Bella? This is bad; you shouldn't provoke the Precious.
Yes, I should. Believe me, girls, it will be worth it.
I couldn't resist kissing him once more, taking charge this time. I kissed his bottom lip first and then paid the same attention to his top lip. His lips were so soft and warm, and he kissed me back like I was the most important thing in his world. I started to feel guilty again, but I caught myself just in time. I did not want to be caught doing inappropriate things in Esme's house, especially when I harbored secret fantasies of spending time with Edward and his family for the rest of my life. In my fantasies, we had plenty of time to defile Edward's old bedroom. I eased off of the kiss and withdrew my hand from his shorts.
"Tonight, Edward," I said, mocking him. "Tonight, you can remind me of just how… male you are." I hopped up quickly and grabbed my bag, running to the adjoining bath and locking the door. I heard bewildered laughter from the other side and I smiled widely. Giving myself a congratulatory fist pump in the bathroom mirror, I started the water for my shower and stripped quickly. The water was freezing.
The girls screamed.
*****
I stared forlornly after Edward and Emmett as they abandoned me in the kitchen with Esme to play Rock Band in the basement. I wanted to play Rock Band. They were just afraid I'd shred their asses. I should never have named him Buttercup… Or teased him mercilessly up in his room…
"Bella, come in, come in! You can help me slice the vegetables for the salad," Esme said with a smile. Cute and fuzzy bunnies, Bella. Stay on your guard… I stepped further into the kitchen and noticed the spicy scent of cumin, garlic, and thyme. It smelled just like the restaurant where Edward and I had our first date. I smiled in spite of my nervousness.
"What else are we having?" I washed my hands and began to carefully slice a bell pepper, keeping my eyes trained on the wicked-looking knife in my hand.
"Oh, I took this wonderful Greek cooking class, and I just learned how to make these great authentic sandwiches!"
It can't be…
"They're called gyros. Have you ever had one?"
The knife slipped a bit and I nearly added the tip of my index finger to the salad ingredients. Heat crept into my cheeks as I answered.
"Yes, I love gyros. I actually had one on my first date with Edward." I finished mutilating the green pepper and set down the knife before looking up.
"Really," Esme said, sporting a smile worthy of the Mona Lisa. She's teasing me!
I'll kill him. I know Edward had something to do with this…
Esme handed me a long English cucumber to slice before turning to pull the seasoned meat out of the oven. I fantasized that the cucumber was Edward's dick and began to slice it into perfect rounds.
NO! Not the Precious! What did the precious ever do to you besides fuck you senseless?
They're right… it's just the "owner" of the Precious that I was peeved with.
"Edward tells me you two met at your job? The Brazilian steakhouse Emmett loves so much?"
"Yeah," I said, grinning at her. "I hit him with the kitchen door. I thought I broke his nose." Esme covered her mouth with her hand, trying to hide her smile.
"Oh, that is priceless. Did you know Emmett broke Edward's nose in the ninth grade?" she asked. "He hit him with a soccer ball."
"Ouch. But you know… I think it's for the best," I said with a smirk.
"Why?"
"Edward would be way too pretty without that little bump in his nose," I told her. "That nose sort of brings him down to earth."
"Oh, you think so?" she laughed.
"Definitely. I mean, that man is too pretty for words anyway." Ooops. T.M.I. for my boyfriend's mother?
Her expression was soft and gentle as she regarded me, her eyes soft and warm. "I'm so glad he's found you, Bella. You're good for him." My cheeks still hadn't cooled from the gyro embarrassment, and I felt them get hotter. For what seemed like the millionth time since I'd met Edward, I found myself without anything to say. I smiled at her and looked down at the cutting board before scraping everything into the salad bowl. I actually didn't know if I was good for him. How good could it be for an alcoholic to date a bartender? I wondered if his parents knew that I tended bar at the steakhouse. His siblings knew and seemed to be fine with it, but I was still afraid his parents wouldn't approve.
However, I knew I was past the point of caring. I wanted to be with Edward. It was time for me to grow up, just as I'd been telling myself recently. I didn't plan on bartending forever. Edward, however… when I thought of him and "forever" in the same stream of consciousness… I wasn't scared. I was hopeful. I honestly couldn't think of my future without him now.
I looked up to see him strolling into the kitchen and my pulse sped up. His warm, verdant eyes met mine easily, sparkling with mischief. I couldn't even be annoyed with him for the gyro conspiracy. I secretly loved that he enjoyed teasing me. It only showed how comfortable he felt with me. Charlie always said, "If a man farts in front of you, it's true love."
I'm pretty sure hell would freeze over before Edward Cullen farted in front of a woman, but if he's so at ease with me that he could constantly tease me… surely that's the next best thing. Wait a minute… farting is the best thing? That can't be right!
He wrapped his arms around my shoulders as he stood behind me and dropped a quick kiss on my head.
"How are you two ladies doing?" he asked. "Is dinner coming along well?" He was pressed so close to me that he hindered my ability to form coherent sentences. I merely nodded. The girls had been right. I shouldn't have provoked the Precious. Now the Precious would be provoking me all night.
Provoking sounds kind of like "poking." Heh, heh… we want the Precious to poke us.
I was seriously considering getting a hysterectomy. Then I wouldn't have to listen to them anymore.
Edward snagged a cucumber round from the salad bowl and popped it into his mouth. "Smells good in here. What else are we having?" he asked when he finished. I looked up at him and caught him winking at Esme.
I knew it. I narrowed my eyes at him and he grinned unrepentantly.
"We're having Greek tonight. Don't you remember? You're the one that suggested it." She shot me a smile and I was relieved that they wouldn't be ganging up on me. It seemed like everyone was fair game for teasing in this family, and I finally began to relax. I had a feeling I would fit right in with these people.
"Oh, you did, did you?" I asked, trying to look stern as I looked up at him over my shoulder.
"Only because it's your favorite," he replied smoothly. He looked up at Esme. "She loves meat sandwiches."
He. Did. Not. Just. Say. That.
I couldn't even offer a smartass reply, because I didn't want his mother thinking I had a dirty mind.
Bella, your mind isn't dirty, it's filthy!
Pot, meet Kettle.
"I sure do," I said with a fake smile. Edward burst out laughing and Esme gave us both a funny look. Suddenly, the kitchen door flew open and a tall, blond man rushed in, tossing his briefcase on the kitchen table. He looked up and I got my first full glimpse of his face. Holy hell.
Edward's dad was ten kinds of hot. Of course, he really couldn't compare to Edward, but for the Viagra crowd, he was definitely top notch. He gave Esme a kiss hello and turned to us. That's when the girls perked up.
Where have you been all our lives, stranger? Rawr.
Oh, fuck. Girls, no. Just. No.
Bella, we need to hedge our bets. That man is hotter than Satan in a sauna!
Oh, God. Girls, shut up.
But Bella! We want to let him play bury the sausage with us!
I was never going to survive this.
"What held you up, Hon?" Esme asked.
"I had a patient go into labor rather suddenly. Luckily, it was her fifth child, so it went quickly," he explained.
"Dad's an OB/GYN," Edward murmured to me quietly.
He specializes in us?? Bella, forget the precious. We want this one.
I had to try very hard to stifle the beginnings of a hysterical giggle. That was just too rich.
Fuck off, girls. I run this ship. Shut up or I'll have him remove you.
Edward released me and took my hand, leading me over to his parents.
"Dad, this is Bella," he said. I caught the look in his eye when he said my name. His gaze was so affectionate, it made warmth gather in my chest and I had to fight to tear my eyes away.
"Hi, Bella." He took my hand and squeezed gently in greeting. "It's a pleasure to finally meet you."
"Likewise, Dr. Cullen."
"Please, call me Carlisle. You'll find we're not formal at all around here," he said with a smile. He looked at Esme, and the look on his face was one of the sweetest I'd ever seen. I turned to look at Edward and found him watching me; my stomach dropped into my feet. It was the same look Carlisle was giving Esme. I locked my knees at the wave of disorientation that washed over me.
Holy shit… I'm in love with him.
It was fucking scary. I still had dinner with all of them to get through, and the girls were very talkative tonight.
God, give me strength, because the Captain won't be here to help me with this one.
*****
A/N: Let it be known that my husband must love me VERY much. He also loves prunes. God help me.
So I lied, dinner is next time. The chapter ran away from me. I apologize. Hope you enjoyed road rage Bella and her attempt at using the tractor beam magic.
Thanks to AngryBadgerGirl for reccing my little fantasy world in Apples & Oranges. The girls want the inside scoop from Sk8r Girl's girls, because they need some pointers on successful conception. They're quite jealous.
Thanks also go to WriteOnTime for pimping out the girls in The Port Angeles Players.
"Bad Habit" lyrics belong to the Offspring.
"The wasting of finite resources is everyone's business" quote belongs to Stephenie Meyer.
Nominations for the Summer Bellies are open! Go nominate your favorite fics!
http://www(dot)thecatt(dot)
Nominations are also open for the Indie TwiFic Awards. Go give some of those awesome lesser-known fics some recognition!
http://theindietwificawards(dot)
Now, my lovelies… REVIEW. Please? Don't provoke the Precious. Teasers for reviews this time! I'm actually prepared! The girls would love 1000 reviews (I know, I'm laughing hard enough to pee my pants too… but that makes me cool in Billy Madison's eyes).
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