Chapter 14

A/N:Ok, I don't know where everyone stands on the whole Lisa/Dean relationship...I like her as a character-and the actress is from Halifax, which happens to be one of my favourite places in Canada(you should totally all vacation there...okay, now I sound like a travelogue...)

This chapter is really a two-parter...so ideally the second part will be posted in a timely fashion.

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It was late Friday afternoon and Lisa Braeden was driving along the rain slicked roads to pick up her son Ben up from Karate class. She frowned out at the gloomy sky.

The last few monthes had been hard.

Ben had been angry at everyone when Sam showed up at their front door back in May and took Dean with him.

They barely had time to adjust during the month Dean had stayed with them. Dean was heartbroken over the loss of his brother. He'd thrown himself into the role of über-perfect family-man after the first few days: taking Ben to Karate class, playing baseball with him at the park, helping him with his homework, giving him PG-rated advice about girls.

Dean found a part-time job as a mechanic in town and took Lisa on dates: they went to see the Iron Man sequel, had an honest-to-God picnic lunch in the park, and took a Fusion cooking class together. The other couple that they met in the class were promptly invited by Dean to come over that weekend for a potluck.

He drank a lot.

Lisa wondered if she should have been worried about that, but frankly, she was more concerned about his weirdly uncharacteristic family-man behaviour. It was as though he was trying to be Ward Cleaver. So yeah, Dean drinking at the end of each day concerned her far less than his attempts to be cast in Father Knows Best.

Lisa had invited Dean into her bedroom the night he had shown up at their door. If ever there was a man in need of comfort sex, it was Dean Winchester. He'd made an effort to be with her, but more often than not Lisa could see the grief keeping him from any real pleasure. Her offer was open ended, but Dean made himself comfortable in the guest room. She wondered if Sam hadn't come back if Dean would have moved in to her bedroom eventually.

After he left the money started to show up. Envelopes stuffed full of twenties. No return address, but the hand-writing was familiar enough that she knew who it was coming from. He never sent a note along, just the money. Child-support. The summer when Dean had shown up at Ben's 8th birthday party was the only time he'd ever asked about Ben's father. The lie had slid easily off of her tongue at the time. She'd been so shocked to see him. Should I have told him the truth? It's not as though he stuck around, that time, or the time after that. Still, that's something that should be shared face-to-face.

Lisa sighed and tried to concentrate on the road. The Jeep was hard to handle in this sort of weather and she found herself fighting to keep the vehicle from hydroplaning. The wind kept buffeting angrily against the Jeep from all sides, no true direction to the sheets of water that teamed from the sky.

The roads were all but empty which was just as well because visibility was negligible. It figures that I'm the only one silly enough to brave the elements on a day like today. She didn't have much further to go. Just over the bridge and a few streets over.

She reached for the knob on the dash to turn on the radio. Maybe Ben and I can get dinner in town while we wait out the storm. There was a sandwich shop near the Karate school that was pretty good.

It happened so fast that Lisa didn't have much time to think. The road was flooded and the Jeep spun out of her control. She tried desperately to find her equilibrium, but she couldn't even tell what direction she was facing any more. She felt her stomach lurch as the Jeep pitched violently and went into a sort of free fall.

When the Jeep landed, all she could feel was pain.

And that cliché about seeing your life flash before your eyes? Total lie.

XXXX

Ben was waiting at the Karate studio with his Sensei. It had started to rain and they were both staring out at the storm. All of the other kids had already been picked up from the class. Ryan Humphrey's mom had offered him a ride home, but when Ben had tried to phone his Mom to tell her, her cellphone went straight to voicemail...so here he was, just waiting.

"It's pretty bad out there, isn't it, buddy?"Sensei Andrew frowned at the weather,"I'm sure your Mom will get here soon."

45 minutes later, she still hadn't arrived.

Sensei Andrew decided to drive Ben home, rather than wait any longer. The rain had abated a little and they were able to load into the karate instructor's green Prius without getting too wet.

It was slow going, because the roads were half-flooded. They finally reached the bridge only to be met by flashing police and ambulance lights.

Ben felt as though an invisible rock had formed in the pit of his stomach.

Sensei Andrew rolled down his window a crack as they inched forward passed the emergency vehicles. One of the police officers approached the Prius,"We're just going to get your to drive slowly as you pass the emergency crew, sir."

"What happened?"

"Lady flipped her Jeep...skidded right across the road and off the bridge...so take your time."

Ben had frozen at the police officer's words,"Mom?"

Sensei Andrew looked at his charge,"I'm sure it wasn't your Mom...she drives a-"

"Jeep...we have a blue Jeep."

"You think you know the lady, son?" The officer frowned and looked over at Ben.

"His Mom was supposed to pick him up from karate; we couldn't reach her on her cellphone. I just figured one of the cell towers had gone down in the weather."

"Hold on."The officer turned away from the Prius and spoke into his radio,"Archie, we got possible kin of the vic on site. You got an ID yet? Bring it up, would ya?" The officer turned back to Andrew and Ben,"I'm going to get you to pull over to the side. We'll sort this out in a jiff, don'tcha worry."

Andrew pulled his car over to where the officer had directed and turned in his seat to face Ben."Hey, buddy-everything's gonna be okay."

Ben blinked in Andrew's direction. Why were adults such bad liars?

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Saturday afternoon found Frank surfing an airline website for flight times and prices on her laptop, amidst checking emails from her grandfather and her best friend Steph. They'd spent the rest of the day in the motel in Madison, Wisconsin; Sam was looking for another case on his own laptop, Dean was cleaning their arsenal with a surly expression on his face that seemed to deepen everytime he looked over at Frank.

The tension had only mounted after she finished Dark Side of the Moon. Frank hadn't liked reading about the marital tension between Mary and John, she didn't like the way her gut twisted over Sam's heaven being the night he left for Stanford-one of Dean's worst memories. The frightening tale of the Winchesters being stalked by Zachariah made her head ache. The brief pleasure of seeing Pamela the psychic and Ash in heaven, did not ease the encounter with a twisted version of Mary...and whatever Zachariah was implying they were doing together.

Even when they were saved by Joshua, Frank did not feel comforted by his pessimistic words. It just didn't sit right with her when Joshua told them that God 'didn't think it was His problem.' And Castiel had been so disappointed.

That evening, Dean's cellphone rang. He wiped his hands on a rag and fished the phone from his pocket. He glanced at the screen, frowned and answered,"Hello?"

"Is this Dean Winchester?"a curt voice came over the line.

"Uh, who is this?"

There was a short silence before the man answered tersely,"Eric Braeden."

"Braeden?...Like Lisa and Ben Brae-"

"Yes. I'm her brother."

"Ok, yeah, this is Dean."

Sam looked over at his brother curiously.

"Lisa's dead."

As much as Dean appreciated directness, he nearly fumbled his cellphone."What? How?"

"Car accident."

"Was Ben hurt?"

"He's fine. She was on her way to pick him up from his Karate class."

Dean sat down heavily.

Frank and Sam exchanged concerned looks.

"The funeral's in a few days."

"Right."

"It's here in Cicero. Do you have a pen? I'll give you directions to the funeral home."

"Uh, hold on."Dean covered his phone and grabbed the motel stationary.

"You ok?"Sam asked quietly.

"Lisa was killed."

Frank and Sam wore identical shocked expressions.

Dean jotted down the directions from Eric. He ended the call and grabbed the Impala's keys.

"Dean,"Sam's face wore an expression of anguish,"Where are you going?"

"Out."Dean growled.

"When will you be-"

"Later."Dean left the motel room.

Frank rose from where she was sitting with her laptop on the other bed and picked up the pad of motel stationary."Hartley Funeral Homes. 209 West Jackson Street, Cicero, Indiana. Eric Braeden."she looked up."Should we go after him?"

Sam frowned at the door, and then looked at the bed."No, he left everything here...he won't go far. We'll be here when he gets back."

Frank nodded, trusting Sam's judgement."How long will it take to get to Cicero?"

"Less than a day, 6 hours maybe."

"We can stay here tonight. Tomorrow morning we'll get Dean fed, and then we'll head out."If there's one thing Frank had learned from traveling with the Winchesters, it's that Dean operated better on a full stomach.

Sam nodded in agreement.

"God didn't give up."Frank said after a moment, her posture straightening.

"What?"Sam was thrown by her non sequitur.

Frank gestured at the copy of Dark Side of the Moon that she'd left on the bedside table once she had finished reading it"God wanted you to remember your trip to Heaven. He didn't back off because He doesn't care; He back off because He'd given you everything you needed to finish the job."Frank was moving around the room restlessly."Like Winston Churchill."

Sam cocked his head to the side, considering,"You think so?"

Frank's eyes gleamed."I know so."

Sam smiled,"You might be right."

"By the way, what happened to the amulet? Did you fish it out of that trash bin?"

Sam inclined his head and smiled.

"Go Team Free Will!"

XXX

Dean was frantic with worry about Ben. The day that Dean had showed up at the Braeden's door after Sam had fallen into the Pit with Lucifer and Michael was the beginning of a rocky month. Dean had been half out of his mind with grief, he drank too much, had nightmares, and searched through every book he could get his hands on, all the while trying to fit into the puzzle of Lisa and Ben's lives.

Dean parked the Impala in front of the bar down the street and strolled inside. He needed a drink more than he needed air right now.

His heart was torn in two for Ben. Growing up without Mom had been rough on Sam and Dean, but at least they'd had Dad. Ben only had one parent to begin with, and now he had no one. Well, except maybe his uncle, Dean considered, Eric-was it?

There was no question over whether or not they were going to the funeral. Dean had to make sure that Ben was going to be ok. He had to make sure that someone was going to be there for the kid.

Dean signaled to the bartender to bring him over a shot as he settled onto the stool at the bar and slapped down some cash.

Ben was probably going to go live with this uncle. Dean considered that he didn't know much about Lisa's brother at all, just that she'd had one. They'd drifted apart after their father, Gerald Braeden, had died of lung cancer close to when Dean had actually met Lisa for the first time. The Bendy Weekend. He didn't know if this Eric guy was going to be in any shape to take care of Ben. Didn't know if Eric was homeless, or violent, or even cared about Ben at all.

Dean stayed for a couple more shots before heading back to the motel. He wasn't nearly as drunk as he wanted to be. He wasn't even drunk enough to make him think twice about driving the Impala the couple blocks back to the room.

He turned his eye in the door to find Frank and Sam still up, sitting at the small kitchen table pouring over something on Sam's laptop.

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They were on the road again the next day, a clear Sunday morning, heading for Indiana. Frank was reading Point of No Return in the back seat.

"The real Adam is a whole lot more like Dean than Ghoul Adam."Frank mused."And gets along with him better, too."

Dean's scowl deepened as he thought of yet another person he had lost along the way. Sam looked over at his brother with a furrowed brow as Dean accelerated along the country road, kicking up dust with the Impala's tires.

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"What I find interesting is that after being around for millenia these creatures still find it easy to underestimate humans as worthy opponents."Frank looked up from her copy of Hammer of the Gods.

"Yes, fascinating."Dean muttered.

"Well, it's not hard to beat humans when you have supernatural abilities."Sam pointed out, giving Dean a worried sidelong glance.

Dean ignored his brother's silent concern.

"It is when those humans have been chosen by God."Frank argued.

"What exactly makes Lucifer think that, after he destroys the world, God isn't going to smite him?"Frank was a little at a loss to understand the Devil's logic.

Sam considered,"Probably he thought that God is off somewhere, not caring."

"Idjit."Frank muttered, turning the page.

XXX

Frank slapped her hand over her mouth with a gasp,"Oh no!"her eyes were welling up with tears.

"What's wrong?"Dean nearly swerved into oncoming traffic.

"She's still reading."Sam said, craning his head back.

"What happened?"Dean asked, craning to look at the book cover.

"Lucifer just...he just...Gabriel's dead!"Frank wiped her tears away, looking at Dean balefully,"I can't believe he killed him..."

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Frank slammed the copy of The Devil You Know shut in a fit of anger."He sold his soul? Has he learned nothing from you guys?"

Frank fished her cellphone out of her purse at her feet in the backseat and started viciously punching in Bobby's number.

"Calm down, everything worked out ok...and that was monthes ago..."Sam pacified.

Frank sent him a fierce glare, shut off the phone with a growl and picked the next book.."I will talk to him later."

Dean stifled a half-smile and took an off ramp for some lunch.

A few minutes later Frank groaned."Well, that's just perfect...Castiel lost his angelic powers. Seriously, what else could possibly go wrong?"

"We've learned it's best not to say that."Sam shrugged,"It's like asking for trouble."

"Fair enough."

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"Of course Michael is using Adam as his vessel!"Frank exclaimed loudly as Dean pulled away from the drive-thru.

"Ah yes, getting to the good part, are you?"Dean asked grimly as he unloaded the brown paper bag.

Frank set her book down and wandered over, drawn by the smell of fried grease."What did you end up ordering, anyway?"

"It's international food,"Dean gestured over his shoulder at the small restaurant that was shrinking in the rearview mirror,"-we've got Chinese, Thai, Mexican-something called escamole tacos, and regular all-American burgers."

"Escamoles, you mean those ant eggs that are slightly nutty tasting? I didn't know they sold those in the States." Frank mused.

"Ant eggs?"Sam asked, wrinkling his brow.

"Yeah, they are harvested from these giant venomous black ants that live in the roots of agave plants. Usually the eggs are served in tacos with a side of guacamole."Frank said with an amused smile on her face.

"Um, I think I'll pass on those."Dean curled his lip, reaching into the bag and tossing the offending burritos out the window."Do you think the rest of this stuff is safe to eat?"

"I didn't say it wasn't safe..."Frank protested, face stunned at Dean's blatant littering.

"Edible, then?"Sam supplied.

"It's edible. It's just...exotic."

"I think I'm going to stick with the traditional burger, if it's all the same to you."Dean eyed the food suspiciously.

Frank rolled her eyes, leaned over the front seat to grab the container of Soo Guy and opened it, inhaling the almond scent."Variety is the spice of life."

"William Cowper."Sam cited, opening the wrapping on his burger.

"Enough with the English lesson, I'm starving."Dean said, driving with one hand and digging into his own burger.

"What do you say we pull over to eat?"Frank suggested."I saw a picnic area that we passed when we came off the highway.

"The weather's nice."Dean said by way of agreement.

Frank smiled at Dean and minutes later, after directing Dean to the picnic tapbles, helped the brothers move the party outdoors. She said a small prayer of thanks over the food, and they all enjoyed their dinner in silence, contemplating the cooling October weather and the strange take-out place near Joliet, Illinois that featured ant egg burritos.

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After lunch they threw out their takeout garbage and headed back into the car. Frank picked up her book again."Neither of us can remember?"she scoffed after a few minutes back on the road.

"Uh...what?"Sam asked.

"Death is talking out of his ass about how neither he, nor God, can remember who came first. God is God. I suspect that God remembers that He came first."Frank was affronted by Death's assertion to the contrary.

Sam was about to comment when it became evident that Frank was not quite done with her rant,"And as for Death thinking that Dean has an inflated sense of his own importance...uh, Death thinks he's going to reap God. Yet Death can be bound by a spell that Lucifer worked. Clearly Death's conveniently forgotten all that lore that mentions the whole 'omnipotent, omnicient, omnipresent' description of God. That, or someone's been telling Death lies."

"You don't think God can be reaped?"Dean wanted to know.

"Nope."

"Killed?"

"Nope."

"Die-"

"No! Who are you-Neitzsche?"

"-of old age...?"

Frank regarded Dean in the rearview mirror with an extremely nonplussed expression."Are you trying to get a rise out of me?"

Dean wore his innocent face.

"That's what I thought. You better be careful or you're going to find yourself in the belly of a giant fish."Frank rolled her eyes, but couldn't help smiling as she turned the page of the book.

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Frank took a deep breath, picked up Swan Song and stared at the cover contemplatively. "So, the Apocalypse, eh?" She asked nervously.

"Don't you think you should rest and just read that tomorrow?"Dean suggested gently.

Frank looked at Dean and quirked an eyebrow,"I don't think I could be surprised by anything anymore. Besides, everything turned out ok, right? Both of you are alive, Castiel has his angel powers back, the world didn't end."

"Still, it's not going to be a picnic to read about."Sam said cautiously.

"I'm sure it wasn't a picnic to live out, either."Frank pointed out, making herself comfortable in the back seat.

Dean and Sam would look over to Frank every so often as she read the last book that Chuck had published. She turned the pages with trepidation, fingers nervous and trembling.

Several pages in they heard her gasp and cover her mouth in shock.

"What happened? Are you going to be ok?"Dean half-turned from the wheel.

"He just exploded Castiel...he broke Bobby's neck."Frank's face was dark with fury,"And now he's beating you to a bloody pulp...I am so glad you put him back in the Pit."Frank went back to reading with a vicious turn of the page.

Sam pursed his lips."So are we."

XXX

Frank closed the book and looked over at Dean. How had he gone from living with Ben and Lisa to travelling on the road again with Sam? And how did Sam get out of Hell? She looked around for the next book, but couldn't find it."This is it? Where's the next book?"

"How does it end?" Sam asked curiously.

"Well, you and Lucifer and Michael fall into the Pit. Dean goes to Lisa's. You show up outside her house. Fade to black. What happened?"

"Michael locked Lucifer in the Pit. Then he pulled Sam out." Dean said.

"And then Dean left with me."

"What happened to the apple pie life?"

"I don't think we'll ever get that." Dean said carefully.

Frank nodded,"There was a very cautious man. Who never laughed or played. He never risked, he never tried. He never sang or prayed. And when he one day passed away, his insurance was denied. For since he never really lived, they claimed he never died."

"That's what we should have been doing this whole time...life insurance claims. Credit card fraud is small potatos...we should have been cashing in on each other." Dean nodded.

"I don't think that was her point." Sam said slowly.

Dean shrugged."I know...but I'm just sayin'..."

Frank put Swan Song back into the cardboard box beside her on the back seat of the Impala with all of the other Supernatural novels. She leaned her arm on the door and stared out the window. If she was honest with herself, she was glad that Dean had not remained in domesticity. It just wasn't what he was meant for. She felt the same way about herself. It was part of the reason she'd gone off to Haiti for 6 months. It was part of the reason why she'd stayed with the Winchesters on their zigzagged roadtrip across the continental US, instead of flying home after meeting Bobby. Sam and Dean's family motto of 'saving people and hunting things' was not far off from her own desire to save the world over one sick or injured person at a time. The wanderlust had gripped her tightly at a very young age and she thrilled at the chance for adventure.

"Wild heart, child heart, all of the world your home. Glad heart, mad heart, what can you do but roam?" she remembered a line from a poem.

"Robert Service. Wanderlust." Sam glanced over his shoulder.

"Mais oui."Frank smiled.

"You have brains in your head. You have feet in your shoes. You can steer yourself any direction you choose."Dean put in his two cents.

"Theodore Geisel."Sam cited.

"Nope! Dr. Seuss."Dean gave Sam a self-satisfied smirk for knowing something Sam didn't.

"Dean, Geisel is Dr. Seuss."Sam corrected.

"I've never understood why male writers take pseudonyms."Frank said,"I mean, I understand why S.E. Hinton and J.K. Rowling used their initials, and Harper Lee was just lucky with her gender-neutral name...but what purpose does 'Carver Edlund' serve for Chuck, that his own name couldn't?"

"Anonymity?"Dean suggested.

"Yeah, but we found him."Sam pointed out.

"But that's because we're awesome."Dean reminded his brother.

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